the quiet in-betweens.

r — ✵ she/her | infj-t 4w5 writing ✧ movies ✧ khh&kpop ✧ mental health journey ✧ romcoms & thrillers

[polaris-archive]

✵ Welcome to my blog ✵

Hi there, i'm r— ✵

I write deep into the night and have an erratic sleeping schedule (not sure it can be considered one though)

This is the space where I'll dump my creative process, moodboards & visuals, story updates and personal writing journey, often tied to my mental health battles and quiet wins :)

✵ a little about me:

- an infj-t, which means i’m a professional overthinker and i’m always quietly absorbing the emotions that surround me - the common denominators of all my projects are: bittersweet endings, the unsaid, grieving the life we didn’t choose - my interests include: WKW movies, La La Land, Past Lives, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, Nana, visual novels (and a lot more) - big fan of khh, krnb and 2nd gen kpop. in particular the DPR collective and CL (i love music in all its forms tho) - can’t live without art and fashion (love love love expressionist art and vivienne westwood) - currently reading The Secret History and The Five People You Meet in Heaven

✵ my current work in progress

polaris. (2025 redux)

a fanfiction inspired by the music videos of CL and DPR IAN but reinterpreted and expanded as a character driven novella that explores mental health and its impact on relationships, creative obsession and a bittersweet romance suspended in time.

i started writing it in 2020 but decided to come back to finish it after 5 long years. (never lose faith in that ao3 story last updated in 2015 lol) crazy how much you can mature and experience.

it is true that simply ‘living’ is fuel for writing.

cupid’s beloved (completed)

a short story about Cupid disobeying the rules that come with his duties due to his obsession for a human woman. he soon discovers why gods shouldn’t meddle with humans.

✵ a small quote for you fellow writers:

“People often think that writing a novel starts with an idea. But actually, a story begins with a desire: the desire to write. A desire that takes hold of you and nothing can stop, a desire that pulls you away from everything else. This constant urge to write—I call it ‘the writer’s disease’ — The Enigma of Room 622, Joel Dicker.

[federicagiordanophotography]

By Federica Giordano

[dailyflicks]

ROMAN HOLIDAY 1953 — dir. William Wyler

[riseswind]

ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND (2004) dir. Michel Gondry

[title]

“May I rest my weary head on your shoulder?” (insp.)

In the Mood for Love (2000), Rafiki (2018), Cold War (2018), Your Name Engraved Herein (2020), But I’m a Cheerleader (1999), Moonlight (2016), Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019), And Then We Danced (2019), Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004), My Own Private Idaho (1991), Anatomy of a Fall (2023), Lovesong (2016), God’s Own Country (2017), The Handmaiden (2016), Notorious (1946)

[tvandfilm]

La La Land dir. Damien Chazelle | 2016

[polaris-archive]

✵ polaris. | chapter 3 - ghost voice. | now live on AO3

I had to drop it somewhere, it was supposed to stay behind. But so was I.

author's note. Surprise! I know I went on pushing for a scheduled release, but I'd rather just post when I feel something is ready enough. Yay spontaneity! This is not a rewrite of the the 2020 fic but new content that finally gives us a glimpse of Chaerin's character pov. This was completely missing and rather needed to explain why tf she left so suddenly in Chapter 1. Admittedly, one of my favourite chapters. I'm just relieved I can finally publish this piece.

Thank you again for being here. r —✵

—full author's notes, creative process and easter eggs: here

[polaris-archive]

extended author's notes | creative process

This is the space where I'll dump my creative notes, fun facts, and details involved in my creative process. just a nice extra :)

✵ Writing process. As I mentioned, this is not a rewritten piece but brand new content I decided to add to deepen the story and Chaerin's POV. In the previous version of the fan fiction, we only delved into her journey through brief glimpses that hardly carried the entire depth of her struggles and interiority. Here we see how much it pained her to leave. Why she said "Maybe I should just go to LA." back in Chapter 1. We do see the moment she drapes the jacket over Ian before leaving.

I absolutely loved writing the banter between her and Matthew. That's probably my favourite part.

✵✵✵

✵ Cover art. For the cover art I imagined Chaerin's character on the passenger seat of a cab driving through Los Angeles' palm trees. There's a contrast between the loneliness and the glamour and warmth of the city that I wanted to depict. Chaerin moves quickly, never stays somewhere long enough. That's the feeling I wanted to capture.

The handwritten words on the picture (because yes, I had to handrwrite that phrase only for it to be unreadable) is a quote from the chapter and it says: " The more I stared into the booth, the more I saw myself become reference material."

✵✵✵

✵ Music embed. There were a couple of songs I kept replaying while writing this. I can't help but search up Rihanna's songs whenever I'm in Chaerin's shoes. When I close my eyes to GET IT OVER WITH I imagine Chaerin and her lugagge by the door, inhaling deeply before leaving.

✵✵✵

That's it for today. If you’re reading this, thank you—r ✵

— from ✵ polaris (redux). full archive + extras: @polaris-archive

[polaris-archive]

✵ polaris. | chapter 3 - ghost voice. | now live on AO3

I had to drop it somewhere, it was supposed to stay behind. But so was I.

author's note. Surprise! I know I went on pushing for a scheduled release, but I'd rather just post when I feel something is ready enough. Yay spontaneity! This is not a rewrite of the the 2020 fic but new content that finally gives us a glimpse of Chaerin's character pov. This was completely missing and rather needed to explain why tf she left so suddenly in Chapter 1. Admittedly, one of my favourite chapters. I'm just relieved I can finally publish this piece.

Thank you again for being here. r —✵

—full author's notes, creative process and easter eggs: here

[fyeahdprian]

dprian Instagram Story June 15, 2026

[polaris-archive]

✵ polaris. posted chapters.

prologue.

chapter 1 - gone.

chapter 2 - blackout.

chapter 3 - maybe it took over.

chapter 4 - ghost voice.

more soon —r ✵

[polaris-archive]

✵ polaris. | chapter 3 - maybe it took over. | now live on AO3

it happened again.

author's notes. This made it out of the dungeon, huh? It's been one year since I've got back to the manuscript and many things keep shifting. I wasn't sure if this chapter should've made it to the 2025 redux version. It was cherished a lot back in 2020 because of its "strong" and almost grotesque nature. The confusion, the loss, the lies. You walk with Ian through all of this.

So thank you again for coming along. We're descending. How long until the crash? r —✵

—full author's notes, creative process and easter eggs: here

[polaris-archive]

extended author's notes | creative process

This is the space where I'll dump my creative notes, fun facts, and details involved in my creative process. just a nice extra :)

✵ DPR IAN Easter Egg / Music reference.

DPR IAN - Welcome To The Other SIde [soundcloud link] Two minutes left 'til midnight Line in Polaris: [Created: Monday, November 4, 2020, 11:58 AM]

See what I did there? I'm just a sucker for details like this that one would hardly catch (i mean, it's very subtle...)

✵✵✵

✵ rewrite.

Again, I wasn't sure if keeping this chapter would've fit the tone of the redux. It's quite dramatic and grotesque. My fear was that it would turn the story in a cringy direction. Stil, I decided to keep it, toning down and cutting down the stuff that gave me the "ick".

I felt it was necessary to really immserse in the confusion and distress that Ian's character would feel at this point of the story. He's still coming to terms with what's been happening to him.

I also wanted to keep that little Chaerin flashback to really deepen the bond they had before the start of the story. I really wanted it to be triggered by the stranger to create the contrast between confusion and the familiarity (and warmth)

✵✵✵

That's it for today. If you’re reading this, thank you. —r ✵

— from ✵ polaris (redux). full archive + extras: @polaris-archive

[polaris-archive]

✵ polaris. | chapter 3 - maybe it took over. | now live on AO3

it happened again.

author's notes. This made it out of the dungeon, huh? It's been one year since I've got back to the manuscript and many things keep shifting. I wasn't sure if this chapter should've made it to the 2025 redux version. It was cherished a lot back in 2020 because of its "strong" and almost grotesque nature. The confusion, the loss, the lies. You walk with Ian through all of this.

So thank you again for coming along. We're descending. How long until the crash? r —✵

—full author's notes, creative process and easter eggs: here

[byemambo]

And I saw you as I walked in through the side To a room full of actors, all getting high And I had my heart broken just the other night And now I just tell myself you're the only one that kept me sane

20260402 | DPR IAN - THE SHOW

DPR IAN 8TH SINGLE [The Show] | dir. DPR IAN

[heartpeacenquiet]

[fyeahdpr]

dpr_official Instagram Story March 31, 2026

[andastra-en-route-deactivated20]

[priezpourlui]

"Shadow Cast" by Pacifico Silano