ponderingthoughts

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

ok this man is literally the best tf????? like words cannot even explain how amazing this last week has been with him.

- he’s communicative

- he’s super cute

- he’s super funny

- he loves to eat (😏) with no expectations

- he’s a very good kisser

- he pays every time

- he drives us everywhere

- he plans dates but always asks for my feedback or suggestions

- he’s already made us reservations for valentines

I mean, I could go on and fucking on about how amazing his is and what an amazing boyfriend he is. He understands all of my weird ADHD and autism quirks. He’s just the best. I will be looking back on this in a few years for vow inspiration I’m sure 🥰😌😉

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

guess who has a frickin boyfriend now suckers!!!!!

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

made out in front of my parents house like a couple of teenagers 🫣😉 second date was AMAZING he’s so easy to talk to and so nice and funny and sweet and I reallllllyyyyy like him. he called me cute and then asked my permission to kiss me we love a consent conscious king 🥹😂

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

ok I don't want to get ahead of myself, but this guy is making such a big effort to talk to me everyday and ask me what I'm doing and everything. this feels like the start of something actually good?? I honestly was at a point where I felt like I was never going to actually find someone who wanted to really be with me for real and then he suddenly popped up out of nowhere. maybe it is actually true that you get what you want when you stop trying so hard to find it idk :)

most of my online dating matches and first dates have gone literally nowhere so this is so weird but it feels really good and magical and right for some reason. I feel like I can come on too strong sometimes with the no filter/blunt thing that is my real personality but at the end of the day I want to be truthful about who I really am and either people like it or they don't.

he's the first person I've gone out with that is more offline, like he has socials but he prefers to not use them so much, just occasionally. and we just like clicked really well personality wise, we're both yappers with big personalities. and I looked up the salary for his job and oh mama, he makes bank at his job haha. but beyond that he's cute, funny, kind, puts up with me, lets me yap, etc.

I just have a really good feeling about him and with the new year starting it feels like so feel so secure in the direction my life is headed in. 2026 truly feels like my year, especially after the last two years being kind of awful in a lot of ways.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

we're going on a second date on sunday :) thrifting with detours for sweet treats! I haven't had someone make this much effort to spending actual time with me in a looong time and he makes an effort to text me daily too. it's just very refreshing to actually be desired and not wanted for just a quick hookup.

the conversation flowed so nicely last night with little to no awkward pauses or anything. and he's funny and tall and very cute.

I'm letting myself have some hope and I really really hope it goes well.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

First date tonight went well, the man is communicative, texted me good morning today and kept messaging me leading up to the date. has no social media presence, has a nice full time job, doesn’t live at home, overall very nice. Conversation was steady and flowed well and he wants to hang out again he he. Overall it was a very good first day and very promising.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

met this man on hinge and we've been talking for like 2 weeks, trying to find time to hang out (hard bc we both work full time and he's a manager so his schedule is shitty) he stopped responding to me at one point so I point blank asked him if he was done with me and he actually had a heart to heart conversation w/ me where he admitted he was rushing into things (we got sexual pretty fast) and that I drove him crazy hehe we're still talking and flirting and stuff and will hopefully meet up soon. not quite sure if this'll actually turn into something or us just a fwb kinda thing, but i'm just focused on having fun and being in the moment. i gave him an out to stop talking to me during our convo, said i wasn't into drama and actually wanted to hang out regardless of sex and told him I thought he was cute and enjoyed talking to him. ngl i'm been very horny lately and ovulating and just overall wanting some physical touch so being fwb isn't off the table, I just long for more overall so i'm crossing my fingers he actually likes me likes me. he promised to take me out for ice cream so i'm hopeful lol. also he's tall and wears glasses which are my two biggest turn on's with men. he said he'd let me wear his glasses while he bends me over lol.

at the end of the day, I have no problem fucking the first time we meet, I'm very pent up and horny like all the time and the way he talks to me does not help. he calls me a good girl, threatens to spank me ;), told me he'd buy me ice cream, etc. and I get the sense he likes me being all bratty and annoying, denying him pictures of me, the chance to meet up and fuck in his car. I genuinely have not ever gotten this horny just talking to someone before, like every time I think about him or look at his picture, I instantly get horny it's crazy. he sent me some pictures, just normal selfies, when I told him I'd been touching myself to his profile pics. this man didn't know how to manage after I told him I came 6+ times looking at his pictures haha. I was like, I'm attracted to you, of course I came that many times just looking at normal pictures of you. he also works out but isn't super buff, so he's literally perfect. that with the glasses is undoubtedly going to kill me sometime soon. also he wants me on top and I've only ever done that once (not by choice, every time I asked after the one time I did it with a guy, every other man told me they preferred to be on top ugh) so I already very interested.

in conclusion, i'm horny, need this man in every way possible, and I will fuck him if it's the last thing I ever do. as long as I get the ice cream we'll be good.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

asked him out on a third date and he agreed! very happy but very much still figuring out what we want from each other. or specifically what he wants from me, but it's looking good so far.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

ok a few days after the second date. it went well, been feeling pretty good. an old coworker came in who spent a lot of time with him and told me he's 'not looking for a relationship right now' and that he was pretty vocal about that when she worked with us. but we've been on two dates now and he's not mentioned anything about that. i feel like that's something you say before the first date or maybe you don't ask me out of TWICE before dropping that bomb at least.

and who knows maybe he's changed him mind/will change his mind. i feel like we click really well, get on well, have a lot in common. we've lived like two mins away from each other our whole lives and then just so happened to end up working at the same story, so weird. maybe we click enough that he's pushed that aside, idk tho. i feel like it's still a little too early to ask 'what are we/where is this going?" maybe in a date or two we can visit that?

but i'm glad she told me, so at least i've got that info ahead of time/going forward. i do honestly feel like there's potential there but it's a two way street so we'll see. only time will tell. i feel like you don't go out several times and string someone along if you know you're not looking for anything serious. he's 31, I'm almost 27. he has been/seems very communicative so i can't see him intentionally not telling me or stringing me along for no reason, so i'm hopeful, but I understand because i've been in the mindset for the last three/three and a half years. but i'm ready and i'm not here for my time to be wasted.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

date went sooooo well. We have another set for next weekend to go see Nosferatu. I'm really seeing some potential here with this guy. we have a lot in common and live close together too.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

we're going on a date on saturday...

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

another update: we've been texting all day lol. we are SO back.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

update: we've spoke for the first time as of today lol. and I left my number in his bike helmet for him to find when he leave work hehe. I think this is going just about as well as it could.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

as much as I miss my old workplace crush, he never made any kind of move. my new workplace crush is looking like it could actually pan out for real. he's a cute short king who loves jujitsu and wanted to have daughters <3 cross ur fingers for me!

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

ok YALL. so I went in to bring my apron back after my last day and also brought everyone working that day brownies bc I'm nice or whatever and this man came out of the kitchen just to say hi and make a joke about me poisoning the brownies :) and he made a comment about my cute new boots I wore today he literally didn't even have to do all that but he did hehe. I made sure to tell him (and everyone else) that I'd be back in all the time bc me and my grandma love the food they sell. what will it take to make this man ask me out, bc lord knows I won't make a move. multiple people (like 3-4 people) have made comments about him having a crush on me and being unusually nice and helpful to me.

I will literally come in all the time with cookies and cake and brownies until he makes a move if I have to.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

boy at work has slowly been getting touchier and touchier with me and we threw balled up receipts at each other all day today. i've been hard at work manifesting using neville goddard's SATS method. I know the best way to get what I want is to just talk to him, but I have so much anxiety over things like that lol. will only be working there for the next two weeks and I'm hoping he makes a move before then. i'll still go into the restaurant fairly frequently bc my grandma eats their food and makes me go get her some at least every other week, so we'll still see each other to some degree. really do genuinely like him, we have so much in common it's crazy and it helps that he's really cute and nice and respectful. crossing my fingers he makes a move before I leave.

[ponderingthoughtsblog]

this guy I work with literally flirts with me so much, goes out of his way to be helpful to only me, we have special inside jokes with each other, not to mention he's so nice and cute and respectful. dating your coworkers is never a good idea but I am about to quit. and multiple people have come up to me and said they noticed he's 'overly familiar with me' (not like I mind, I def flirt back, etc.) but I've been there 3 months now and he's made no moves but clearly likes me. I have so much anxiety about making the first move and could def be shot down (main reason I don't want to make the first move) by him, but idk. I'll still come to the restaurant bc my grandma likes their food and so do I but idk ugh. I think it a lot of things; his mom is one of the managers, he's trying to be respectful, he doesn't really date (or so I'm told) etc. I've just noticed a bit of a shift, a good one, like how he smiles at me, laughs at my jokes, and it makes me feel some type of way.

trying to manifest something before I leave bc I will highkey miss the flirting lol