So often, we fall for people’s potential. We ignore the signs, so clearly lit up in front of us, because we are instead distracted by the light in their eyes. We make excuses for them.
“They didn’t call me because they are busy” “They just hate texting, it’s okay” “They are just independent, which is what I wanted” “Maybe I’m moving too fast, I don’t want to be too much”
Instead of failing to see the truth - they aren’t right for us. We can try to fit, mold, bend, and break whatever standards we have. We can try to validate every decision because we desperately want it to be them. Why? Because instead of seeing what’s real, we see what could be. We seek validation in the arms of someone that won’t carry us. We put our self worth in people that don’t deserve to have it. We fall for their smile and the way they curl their hair. We fall for their success and the idea of the future. We fall for their laugh - while wondering if they are even noticing yours. We fall in love with outward appearances, the potential of what could be, and crave their approval. Because if it ends, there must be something wrong with us, not them.
Ask yourself this: why in the hell are you less than them?
You may think you’re lucky to have them, but they are lucky to have you. They are so lucky for your brunette hair turned blonde, your sarcasm, and your laugh. They are so lucky for the way you love, your independence, and your desire to succeed. They are so lucky for the way you light up when you talk about what you love. They are so lucky for the way you get ready to go out, take one shot, then go back home. They are so lucky for the mother that you will be and the wife that you will become.
Because for the right person, we won’t be too much. We won’t have to second guess every word we say, wonder where we stand, and trip over ourselves to impress them. We won’t have to wait for just that one phone call, when it’s convenient for them, to get us through another week of uncertainty. For the right person, you love them for who they are. You won’t be sacrificing your values, selling yourself short, and lowering your standards. You won’t spend your days being drained, because they just “get” you. With the right person, you will feel loved. You won’t need validation, because they instilled in you that you’re worth so much more. You will never feel less than, because they won’t make you question your worth. For the right person, it fits. For the right person, the potential is already the reality.
