Anyways, I Think I Get It Now. @pottedplantsandelephants - Tumblr Blog

My Apple Watch told me that I was in an environment loud enough to cause hearing damage if I was exposed to the noise for long enough. My screams were too loud for my own ears to bear. But it my screams are too loud for my own ears to bear, where are they supposed to go? Because it’s too loud for my own chest to bear, it creates a crack down the middle by my heart if I try to keep them in. I have been heartbroken, tested, tried, pushed, anguished, humbled, and lonely too often. I have sent too many condolence texts to mothers whose babies were born too young to make it. I have been hopeless and stuck on getting matters around my home repaired. I had to say goodbye to my dog after he got into something he wasn’t supposed to, only to find out he was five pounds in the clear. I have forced myself to choose myself when all i wanted was to choose someone else so hard that they’d choose me. So I guess my ears will have to go.