the peacemaker

a trapped rainbow, writing away from darkness;welcome to my world of curiosity and prayer 

[prayingiris]

Seek

Being in two places at one time. Through you. Answered prayers doesnt always come in fancy presents. Sometimes they come in raw reminders of the past. Caught in the middle of curiosity and confusion, I start to wonder why again. Am I brave enough to step out of my comfort zone? Am I ready to face the music of my future? Will someone ever stay to embrace all of who I am? I can only seek and wait for now.

[thelovejournals]

Two souls don’t find each other by simple accident.

Jorge Luis Borges (via thelovejournals)

no accidents

[prayingiris]

Transition

My 30th... I look back in awe and as I've been asking myself lately of who I really am... I am now slowly reaching the point of facing who I really want to be. Crossing over... Transition... Changing... Constants in our humble human existence. One step at a time may not matter today, but in His grace... Maybe 30 more years after this banter, I'd look back again and a genuine knowing smile will form in my wrinkly lips. Satisfied.

[prayingiris]

Hazy

I still don't know what I want. No excuses. No conviction. The things I used to hate, Now fills my senses with joy. The things I believed to be true, Now seems hazy.  As I live backwards... All I can pray for is to finally set my heart to live forward.

[prayingiris]

Stay

I told my friend that i am overwhelmed with the extremes of their love story. 7 years in the making and 3months married. I am still wrapping my head around the idea of being with someone someday... permanently. And she asked if there is something in particular that I prayed for.. Yeah. There is. I just pray that He'd be the one to stay. No IFs no BUTs.. He'll stay.

[prayingiris]

Inside Out

I thought I was done being hard on myself; being ironic and inconsistent. I thought my heart was set on an amazing vision; my conviction seemed strong enough. But deep inside... all I was waiting for is a way to let it all out. To correct myself. To face it all and bleed till it all runs dry. I felt the breeze gently calming me; i made a charming smile that I sometimes use to deceive myself and others.. that everything is alright even though it isnt. I am reminded NOT to despise correction, no matter how painful it is. Now the awful question remains unanswered... Which correction will define who I am?

[prayingiris]

Balance

How do you do it? How do you get the best out of everything?

Balance seems easy when it is stable. But on uneven planes it is painful. Caution is more than just a yellow sign. Everyday, every footstep is armed with care. Yet the blind curves exist and you can only look back...

Was it really you walking on that path?

[prayingiris]

The Girl

She wondered why she had so much love to give and so much smile to share. She wanted to see what others saw in her. She was trying to define who she is, as a friend, daughter and colleague. She wasn't sure if something evident has changed. It felt different around her and since she is stubborn, nothing can easily convince her that it is indeed a whole new world for her. She used her heart to see and feel the real things that she needs in her life. She was grateful for everything, even in the smallest things. Her loyalty is a great trait, but it sometimes leads to her weakness. She loved the picturesque sunset more than sunrise, but she is slowly trying to love them equally. She is still a mystery and an irony of her own. Today and for the many tomorrows she'll face, her blessed life will continue to bloom. 

[prayingiris]

Not My Story

My Life Group leader asked me if I could share my baptism testimony. It seems such a simple request. But I asked her to give me time to think abou it. I am a private person not because I am being indifferent. I just mind my own business and I make it a point to use my social media accounts responsibly. A friend thinks I am a 'deep' person. If the depth of sorrows before were involved, then yes, I guess I am. I am generally shallow and I laugh at the simpliest silliest things. If my words appear to be quite opinionated and matter-of-fact, it applies to those that I am passionate about. There are plenty of things that I am still clueless about, but the fire of my passion to learn is a definite priority in my life. If my story appears to be deep, I forgot the main reason why it is even written in the first place. Everything that I am and who I will become is all crafted by God's wisdom. Penned in His faithful will and creativity. I've struggled for quite sometime to write my own story. In vain I have discovered that I cannot do it alone. After our fellowship night last Friday i realized why I must share my story. It ain't mine. It is His story, written for me.

[prayingiris]

Let Go of Your Earthly Desires

My six-word story for this year will be an incredible feat.

It is what I need.

His will for my life feels so magnificent that I can't wait to live fully and happily in this Earth and wait joyously for the coming of His kingdom.

Make everyday count!

[prayingiris]

Seventh Heaven

I clearly remember their happy faces smiling back at me. Seventh Heaven :) We grew up in a country miles away from theirs, but the Camden's story is also a part of my family's journey.

The Lord's number or a number of completion, seven. In the story of creation and many other wonderful instances, He showed His divine grace through this symbol.

A week of revival is definitely overwhelming. I'm just a small seed in a vast forest of great minds. Blooming where you are planted ain't easy, but do you suppose a wild flower like me can take this chance? My own seventh heaven is budding. I can feel it!

[prayingiris]

Sometimes

Sometimes... rhymes hides my fears... smiles mask my tears

But most of the time...

My heart is filled with simple joys... That I simply found in u

*an ode for u, written before i started missing u*

[lifeofquotations]

Is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat’ worse than 'vindictive’, 'jealous’, 'shallow’, 'vain’, 'boring’ or 'cruel’? Not to me.

J.K. Rowling (via lifeofquotations)

[quotemadness]

Do whatever you need to do, but never put someone out of your heart.

Ram Dass (via quotemadness)

n e v e r.

[prayingiris]

Raindrops

​the rustling leaves and drizzling made no difference at all as it kisses my skin and warms my cold heart .MK. *My friend and I enjoyed a nice jog tonight and while we basked in the cool breeze after the rain, we played with words to ease the the weight of a tiring day.*

[prayingiris]

Kairos

Moments and time are valued differently, depending on our perspective and current situation. Kairos is an ancient Greek word meaning the "right or opportune moment" (thanks Wikipedia!). After a few months of uncertainty, I know now that I am claiming my destiny. But am I ready to embrace to this moment? Am I ready for all the responsibility that it entails?

Our fellowship last night focused on keeping the momentum of our spiritual lives. Walking in faith definitely requires vigilance and the consciousness to stay on God's path. I still have plenty of questions and I don't have all the answers...

But this is the moment to rebuild and make everything right.

[prayingiris]

Sense of Smell and Sensibility

My first time for the daily prompt. Excited and unorganized at 1am, here goes senseless typing.

Miles away from home, but almost near with my dear fluffy pet dog. I close my eyes and just remember Ulap's vanilla-like scent after her luxury bath. Then she runs to our kitchen and she starts to linger because my mother is cooking her one and only specialty dish, Adobo. The house is filled with its delicious aroma and even if I am not yet hungry, it lures me to eat heartily.

My least favorite part in the mall or any department store, is the perfume section. The mixture of mild and wild scents overwhelms my olfactory nerves if I stay there for more than ten minutes. Months ago, in a foreign land, in a claustrophobic bargain superstore, hypersensitivity knocked my senses out. I had colds and flu for a week, which was funny and frustrating at the same time. Never again will I dare that place. Never again.

Must I forget a particular scent or should I deal with the memory of the person first? It baffles me that my brain would still trigger such longing with a tiny whiff of his/that scent. I applaud such Italian excellence in their art of  perfumery. Although, I cannot give them credit for the charm and warmth while he wore that scent. It was his own.