Like the true bff that he is Blake offers to help out Zoey an old friend from college, who is currently in the middle of a ridiculous dry spell so the obvious answer to all of this, was of course for her to just go and hook up with Blake.
…because for one night only these two hot friends can have some fun together, with no strings attached instead just some specific ground rules and lots of tension.
{this story will be in four parts, with the third and fourth dedicated to all the smut & then there will be a follow up story told mostly from Blake’s POV}
{Word count} 5.3K
{Warnings} 18 PLUS ONLY with mentions/scenes of the following: swearing, drinking alcohol and drug use, lots of tension, cute fluff and awkwardness, will mention height difference a few times, lots of longing, mention of hook ups, OFC is short, mentions of drink and in scene, friends with benefits, hook up for one night only, a preemptive one night stand sort of, scenes of fingering, oral sex, making out with Blake’s abs, sex in the biblical sense, p in v, different positions, Blake really can multi-task, aftercare, stuffed crust pizza and chill, scenes smoking weed…will add more if needed…
{A\N}
Picture this an AU Workaholics where the boys meet in college obviously, end up at TAC naturally but then the company went bust in their late twenties, now in their thirties Adam and Ders work as realtors together and Blake works several jobs still living up to his slacker lifestyle.
(Some of the above is mentioned in this story of course, but I wanted to also paint a picture to give the reader some idea of what the background of this fan-fic is about)
Despite living in their own places the dudes are still hella close of course with the addition of Zoey, someone else who Blake had met in college and stayed friends with because in this version Adam and Ders are basically the same maybe worse can’t tell, but Blake here finally has some game and a lil reputation as well.
{Story}
Back in the kitchen Blake now has his back to Zoey facing the counter, which makes her smile when her eyes drop down to his peachy behind, but right now it truly was time to finally get her head in the game.
“Shot time wasn’t it?” Zoey questions walking over towards Blake, who still has the bottle of vodka in his left hand.
“And here are the shots all lined up for inspection commander.” Blake states with a cheeky wink whilst putting down the bottle of alcohol, then points at them looking very happy with himself.
“Isn’t it too warm for you to be wearing that tank top right now?” Questions Zoey with a smirk as she counts the six shots, all lined up in a neat row on the counter.
“Only if you take off that damn dress as well because you’re just too hot.” Blake replies in a super flirty tone.
“That’s obviously true but like I said let’s do these shots first!” Zoey winks back sounding nervous again, so she quickly picks up one of the shot glasses to deflect.
“There is absolutely no need to be nervous Zoey.” Blake begins clearly picking up her tone so with a small nod he then states “Because I’m clearly about to rock your world.”
“All I’ve seen so far is you just flirt with me like you always do, and zero action has yet to happen.” Zoey retorts laughing out loud, at the pretend look of hurt that crosses over Blake’s face.
Picking up a shot as well Blake looks down at Zoey who places hers nearer to her mouth, his eyes stopping on her lips as they slowly part and she drinks the vodka, it’s gone in one and she licks her bottom lip happily soon after.
“That was really hot.” Blake states with a cheeky grin, as he quickly takes his first shot as well.
Seconds later his phone suddenly starts to buzz loudly, which makes him curse as he grabs it from the white tiled counter, then moments later he drops it back down with a dull thud picking up yet another shot to hold instead.
“Who was that?” Zoey questions with a smirk as she follows suit, eagerly grabbing shot number two with her right hand.
“Karl is gonna be popping by in a few, he has this new strain of weed, that he’s offering me to try and you can as well of course.” Blake nods as he takes the shot, then seconds later Zoey does the same.
…warm liquid coats her throat as she opens her eyes, noticing that Blake was staring at her with amusement dancing along his lips, the ones that Zoey desperately wanted to kiss right now but obviously she doesn’t.
It was about eight years ago when Karl became a permanent fixture in this friendship family, the story goes that Adam had met him in the car park of a Carls Jr, recommended by someone from the TAC office the guys had worked as the best drug dealer around.
Apparently.
“So Karl doesn’t know about what is happening tonight then?” Zoey questions with mild concern, as she eyes up the last set of shots on the counter.
“You know Karl he’s always assumed that we’ve been fucking for ages.” Blake states with a bemused shrug, then hands Zoey the final shot as he moves one closer for himself as well.
“One night will be more than enough thank you.” Zoey states with a laugh, knocking her shot glass against Blake’s, as they both down their last shots in sync.
“It’s all you’re gonna be getting from me Zoey.” Blake replies teasingly as he then asks in a low voice “So, shots have been had what’s gonna happen next?”
“Take off your damn tee-“
“But before that we definitely need some music playing in here.” Blake cuts Zoey off as he walks, right out of the kitchen heading towards the living room den.
…which was definitely her favourite place with the large TV on the wall, a long mint green thick rug right in the middle, and comfy as fuck dark purple couches that Zoey had crashed on maybe once or twice.
Standing alone in the kitchen Zoey lets out a long breath, one that she hadn’t even been aware she’d been holding onto, but for a third time this evening nerves were making her pause for thought.
Only when a Pixies song starts to play on low it makes Zoey smile, with previous thoughts of this being a bad idea expiring she can slowly feel herself relax again, because this whole album that Blake was currently playing it totally reminded her of college.
Yep, it’s time for another flashback and this was one, that Zoey had avoided thinking about for quite a long time…
“Gigantic by the Pixies plays softly in the background, whilst faint sunshine illuminates through the small bedroom window, casting late afternoon shadows over the patchy old brown carpet…”
“You don’t have to try it-“
“I really want to!” Zoey shrugs with a shy smile aimed at Blake, with both of them sitting cross legged on his very messy bed.
“Just breathe slowly-“
“If I choke on this it’s totally your fault Blake.” Zoey cuts him off as the guy in question, shuffles closer to her with a goofy grin on his face.
“It’s your first time doing this-“
“Don’t say it like that you’re making this weird!” Zoey cuts Blake off then smirks at him, the cute guy who she’d recently met in the parking lot near their college.
…taller than Zoey with messy brown curls tucked under his ears, pretty blue eyes that had no place being on a dude and a playful smile, one that started from the side of his mouth spreading quickly to light up his whole face.
Both of them back then had lived in house shares outside of the college campus, a lot cheaper then on site and impromptu parties were less likely to be shut down which had then lead to, them talking about Blake’s vintage loony toons tee shirt together.
…and somehow she had eventually, ended up in his tiny bedroom finally both of them alone.
Blake silently goes to pass her the glass weed pipe in his left hand but still she hesitates, not wanting to look like a loser in front of him yet here Zoey was, already overthinking it until the choice is made by shaking her head in the negative.
“You know we could actually do this another way.” Begins Blake in a low voice as he adds that “I could shotgun this with you so like instead of pouring beer into your mouth, it would be me just blowing smoke into it so that you can still get a buzz.”
“Ok, sure!” Zoey nods looking back up with a smile, watching as Blake lights up and takes a deep inhale then moving closer, with their knees touching he leans forward whilst balancing on his hands.
…having moments ago placed the glass pipe down on an old D&D hardback, the Pixies song had changed into another, but there was still some kind of awkward tension in the room.
Automatically Zoey slowly opens her mouth watching as Blake’s blue eyes dip to her lips, closing her eyes she feels his breath on her until the moment becomes too much, so she kisses him instead which makes the smoke leave his mouth alongside a surprised gasp.
Both of them attack each other’s mouths with tongues scrambling for purchase, taking one another’s lead as Zoey places her hands on Blake’s shoulders, whilst he grabs at her waist accidentally pinching her in the process with a weak apology pressed firmly against her lips.
…at the very same time that someone decides to walk into Blake’s room, of course without even knocking which totally ruins, the blossoming albeit incredibly cringeworthy moment between them both.
“What is happening here?” Questions the tall dude with short spiky dark blonde hair, in an overly sarcastic voice whilst also wearing a huge grin.
“Get out!” snaps Blake at the same time that Zoey darts away from him, where an instant blush starts spreading across her face.
“Dude put a way bigger sock on the door next time!” The guy salutes Blake, then winking at Zoey he finally leaves the room.
“Stupid fucking Anders.” Begins Blake with an embarrassed smile, but then he quickly asks out loud “Hey, so did you actually mean to kiss me?”
“Oops, was that wrong?” Zoey questions with a shy, yet playful grin on her face.
“It was unexpected-“
“You pinched my skin by the way.” Cuts in Zoey as she then says “Sorry the moment felt right but maybe it was all wrong.”
“We could try it again?” Questions Blake whilst leaning forward, his eyes firmly on Zoey’s.
“Which part the shotgunning or the other thing?” Replies Zoey with a wiggle of her eyebrows.
“Let’s try-“
“Hey Blake, where is that smoke coming from?” Cuts in Zoey as she watches him realise suddenly, that his book was literally on fire on his messy bedside table.
“Shit, fuck!” Blake almost falls off his bed whilst twisting round, knocking the weed pipe off his hardback book.
…which was just lightly burned on the cover but Blake glances back at Zoey, with a super frustrated look on his face, complete with pouty lips that she suddenly wanted to kiss again.
“So this was really fun.” Begins Zoey going for uncomfortable nonchalance instead, because that was what she did best.
“We should totally like hang out together again!” Blake informs Zoey, with a puppy dog look of hopefulness on his face.
“Definitely but maybe just as friends right now.” Zoey declares not wanting to get into anything, clearly she had just made things super weird by initiating that kiss.
…one that she would definitely cringe about for a long time, but Blake had been very willing nonetheless letting her take the lead.
“Oh for sure! You’re too short for me anyways Zo.” Blake replies flippantly also with a snort, to really make his point be known.
…okay sure so she wasn’t his type apparently, but Blake’s words had still managed to momentarily sting Zoey, yet she was able to brush them aside like many other times before.
“I’ve never ever had any complaints in that department Blake!” Zoey informs him with a wink as she picks up her large yellow tote, then with a small wave she leaves his bedroom.
“Me neither!” Blake shouts back as she closes the door with a bemused smile, only to then come face to face with two guys both grinning back happily at her.
…obviously roommates who clearly didn’t understand privacy, and they hadn’t spoken to many girls on campus either, Zoey could just tell that this was true right away.
“So you’re the chick from the parking lot then?” The tall guy named Anders questions, whilst folding his arms across his chest slowly.
“Wow, so you are real!?” Scoffs the other guy named Adam who was shorter, with brown scruffy hair and wearing a look of pure confusion on his face.
“Well I’m Zoey, and this is super creepy so I’m gonna leave now.” Zoey declares in a bored tone, one which makes both guys smirk at one another stupidly.
“Twenty dollars says that we never see Zoey here ever again.” States Adam with a loud snort.
“I dunno dude…”Begins Anders as Zoey winks at them both, then she exits the shared house as quickly as possible…
A loud knock at the door makes Zoey look up from her bare feet, quickly stepping right she can see the front door where Blake lets in his friends, both Karl and of course Adam head inside with one of them waving happily in her direction.
“Hey, Zoey’s here!” Karl shouts as if no one had noticed, which makes Blake on cue elbow him hard in the ribs, whilst his drug dealer bestie just smirks back playfully.
“Woah, looking good there Zoey where are you off to tonight?” Adam questions as he walks right past Blake, heading towards her still in the kitchen.
“Just hanging out here-“
“Oh shit!” Cuts in Karl as he walks closer with an apologetic looking Blake, asking in a stupidly unsexy voice “Is this finally a date guys?”
“Of course not!” Zoey shouts her reply in a super loud voice, one that makes her quickly clear her throat, whilst Adam and Karl share a look together.
“We’re just hanging out dudes you know the usual weekend vibes.” Blake shrugs as if it’s no big thing, whilst Zoey leans against the tiled counter.
…with a nod of agreement aimed at his friends, but from the looks of it neither Adam or Karl were buying it.
“Zoey you look way too hot to just be here with Blake, come out to the bar with me and Anders later?” Adam questions with a wink causing Zoey, to quickly shake her head in the negative.
“And watch you puke Adam whilst Anders pat you on the back no way.” Retorts Zoey sarcastically, grinning at Adam who rolls his eyes right back.
“So you’d rather stay here all night with Blake, who definitely can’t close with you by the way.” Adam retorts with a very serious look on his face, until a smile breaks out that he just can’t hold in.
“Fuck you, I can close plenty Adam!” Blake snaps with a sharp glare, purely aimed at his friend who was finding all this hilarious.
…here we go again these guys always loved to piss one another off, and going by the demonic grin on Adam’s face right now the guy was hell bent, on annoying Blake like always because that was obviously one of his kinks.
“Give me the time and places of these so called hook ups then!” States Adam with a chuckle, whilst sending a cheeky wink in Zoey’s direction.
“I’m not doing this-“
“Okay, so what happened with the brunette that you met at the bar Sully’s then?” Adam questions whilst cutting off Blake, with a smooth yet nonchalant shrug of his shoulders.
“Well her boyfriend didn’t like me talking to her firstly and-“
“Poor excuse, so what about the blonde at grand line then?” Cuts in Adam quickly warming to his favourite theme, the one where he annoys Blake until they start fighting like idiots.
“I had thought that she was smiling in my direction so I approached her, turns out that she just liked meeting women.” Blake shrugs with a small smile on his face.
“Ok then, so what about the hot girl from the chain bar on Lime street?” Adam questions innocently, whilst Karl starts laughing loudly behind him, obviously he had also been at the same bar as well.
“If her ex hadn’t reappeared then things would’ve been so much different!” Blake informs them, complete with a firm shake of his head, and a glare sent back in Karl’s direction.
“So this proves-“
“No, this proves nothing because what about meeting that girl Gwen at the Falls gig!” Blake cuts off Adam, with a huge shit eating grin on his face.
…which for reasons unknown makes Zoey feel a sudden stab of jealousy, which was stupid obviously because apparently he had only gone home with a woman named Gwen, yet this knowledge still makes her feel like walking away from the conversation very quickly.
Obviously over the span of their friendship both Zoey and Blake had relationships, and of course one night stands she knew that he met other women, so why did this suddenly come as a shock to her what did that actually mean?
“Was she the one that I heard about who had some tattoos?” Asks Karl with a cheesy smile on his face.
“Lots of them all over-“
“I still think this literally proves that you should leave with me instead Zoey, and never look back!” Adam cuts off Blake with both a smirk and a nod of his head.
“This isn’t a date-“
“Nope not a date!” Cuts in Blake making Zoey give him a look, one that of course Adam picks up on.
“No it definitely isn’t it’s you two hanging out as just friends.” Adam begins even using air quotes on the last two words as he adds “Like you have always done since college both just ignoring the signs.”
“Signs of what-“
“Cut it out Adam!” Shouts Blake over Zoey who was gonna ask him, what the actual hell was he going on about.
“Just hook up super quick and get it over with already, I still can’t believe that you two haven’t even-“
“Stop it now Adam because we need to get this transaction done super quick!” Begins Karl with a wink gladly cutting off Adam to add “ I’m heading to your guys’ old college afterwards for a few pre gaming deliveries.”
“Let’s do some business then dude.” Nods Blake who gives Adam an unreadable look, as he passes by to guide Karl towards one of the large purple couches.
“Are we doing shots?” Adam questions and before Zoey could even answer, he picks up the bottle of vodka from the side then pours her a drink into one of the empty shot glasses.
…this little interaction here could go one of two ways, because Adam either usually made her laugh or so pissed off, that she would then storm off which would obviously finish tonight before anything had actually happened.
“Thanks.” Zoey nods as Adam hands her the shot, hoping that once she had this then Adam would soon leave her alone.
Because this would be her fourth shot within half an hour, and she was already starting to feel the effects from the earlier three, which wasn’t how Zoey had planned on things going for sure.
…she had just wanted a little buzz, to go alongside the natural one that Blake gave her sometimes no big deal.
Watching as Adam ignores the other shot glasses he grabs a plastic cup from the cupboard, then estimates a measure of vodka which would get him fired if he worked at an actual bar, then with a smile he finally replaces the cap on the near empty bottle and pushes it to one side.
“Ready?” Asks Zoey with a nod not sure if she should actually take the shot, or just throw it behind her into the sink.
“I know what this is all about.” States Adam with a knowing look on his face, as he points a finger at her then behind him where Blake and Karl stood in the den.
“Look Adam!” Begins Zoey ignoring the stupid grin on his face as she explains that “Me and Blake we are just two friends, just hanging out tonight.”
“Oh please, I’ve seen how you always look at my boy, it was Karl who had even pointed it out to me in the first place.” Retorts Adam with a scoff which annoys Zoey briefly.
“You’re both imagining things because we’ve known each other for a long time, it’s just how friends normally look at one another.” Zoey replies with a shrug, and a quick smile trying to ward off Adam.
…yet maybe the lady doth protests too much?
“Like they really want to fuck?” Enquires Adam with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.
“In your dreams-“
“If you actually mean in Blake’s dreams then sure.” Adam cuts Zoey off with a laugh, at the look of pure annoyance on her face.
“Take your damn shot.” Zoey replies not sure what else to say, as Adam grins happily then does as he is told.
“Have I perhaps hit a nerve?” Questions Adam always happy to poke and prod, soon taking Zoey’s shot out of her hand which she allows as he swallows it down quickly.
“Get lost-“
“My advice that I think you should really take note of is this, just go for it dude you’re really hot and Blake would gladly have sex with you!” Adam interjects with his final words of wisdom, as a confident grin sneaks across his stupid mouth.
“That’s good to know-“
“I could even like go and put a good word in for you right now.” Adam practically yells with an over exaggerated wink, then literally saunters out of the kitchen area with a spring in his damn step.
…this really wasn’t good.
Because firstly they had been interrupted sweetly by Blake’s cute neighbours, people who she would totally adore going to a Sunday farmers market with, only now two of their ridiculous friends were here and one was about to try and set her up yet again.
The whole setting them up thing was a regular occurrence between their friends, with someone usually offering her stupid advice on what to do, maybe Zoey should’ve just explained to Adam about her ridiculous dry spell instead.
…but then he would’ve made some ridiculous suggestions, on what she should be doing rather than being here.
It obviously wasn’t lost on Zoey the irony of Adam trying to set her up right now, when him being here was the very reason why Blake wasn’t shirtless right now, and she wasn’t counting his abs or better yet licking them.
Unsure if she should either just stand here in the kitchen, or go and actually see what Adam was saying about her, Zoey decides to stays put instead right near the vodka bottle.
…wishing that neither Adam or Karl, had even shown up here to begin with, because things had been about to get interesting for sure.
That’s it!
Zoey smiles to herself as a plan albeit a little drunk one quickly forms in her head, because all she needed to do was try and get rid of Adam and Karl, to show Blake that it would be best if his friends left immediately like right this second.
…in addition to being horny right now despite the circumstances, Zoey also blames this on the alcohol because it had heightened her senses, and she was finally ready to have some fun.
Maybe she could send Blake a sexy selfie from his bathroom, no that idea was stupid especially seeing how his phone was on the counter still, Zoey would have to give him something of hers then hoping that he would get the hint maybe her pink vibrator perhaps.
…sure it had started as a joke in her head but Zoey had literally bought her favourite toy, and once the idea had formed in her head back home, she couldn’t leave the apartment without it obviously.
…but if Adam was to see it for himself then he would have a fucking field day, the amount of “I knew it’s” that he’d utter would be immense.
So whilst tugging down the bottom of her dress yet again in obvious frustration, Zoey gets the start of an idea one that could go either really well or really bad, but upon hearing the muffled laughter from the living room.
…Zoey knew that she needed to do something right now, otherwise joints would get lit and the chances of her scoring, well that would go up in smoke right in front of her eyes.
So desperate times called for desperate measures, because the last thing that Zoey had imagined was all this waiting around, even fantasising earlier Blake just grabbing her as soon as she’d walked through his front door.
…taking off his tee shirt she’d imagined him wearing the dark blue one, as they kissed one another getting undressed in a rush only for them to trip, and then fall together onto the couch in the best position possible with her on top of course.
Instead they had flirted awkwardly and Zoey kept having flashbacks, surely because things were about to change in this dynamic between them, only she couldn’t wait any longer things needed to get moving like right now.
Finally leaving the kitchen Zoey starts to tip toe right but then stops, because from the sound of it Adam was still talking loudly so instead, she walked away from them towards the two bedrooms and down the short hallway to the very end.
…where Zoey hurriedly reached her destination the bathroom of her dreams, which had a large bath with overhead shower the second favourite place of hers in this whole apartment.
Because bringing a change of clothes after a night out was always the perfect excuse for Zoey, to have a quick shower taking full advantage of both the space, and the various settings on the shower head that one time.
…only after seeing Blake walk out of the bathroom in just a light blue towel, skin damp and hair clinging to his shoulders, Zoey had literally just stood there with her mouth hanging open.
…is this a fantasy?
“What’s the matter Zo?” Questions Blake with his patented lazy smile, aimed cheekily in her direction.
“I, er need to-“ Zoey tries and fails to answer Blake, who just stands there with large hands on either side of his waist.
…right where the towel he was wearing hangs low on him, showing off a damp treasure trail that Zoey stares at with obvious interest.
“Well are you gonna tell me what’s up or my stomach?” Questions Blake in a tone that makes Zoey look back up at him.
“Can I have a shower now that you’ve finished in there?” Zoey asks Blake instead, desperately trying not to let her eyes dip down, back to his abs again.
“Sure, do you need a hand?” Blake asks with a sexy grin, whilst using aforementioned hands to brush slowly through his curly hair.
“Oh, I’m good!” Zoey replies desperately as she darts past Blake, trying to avoid any part of herself from accidentally touching him.
Once inside the bathroom Zoey close the door practically in Blake’s face, he had turned round to give her a bemused look, almost as if he’d known exactly what she was thinking about in her mind.
Pure and utter filth if truth be told because Zoey had woken up horny on Blake’s couch, it’d been one whole month back then into her dry spell, and seeing Blake practically naked had almost short circuited her brain.
Which sure was kind of weird of a thing to admit about one of your oldest friends, Zoey knew this but it hadn’t stopped her from getting undressed, stepping into the bath and smelling hints of Blake’s shower gel which had been orange and mint.
When the cold water was doing absolutely zero to calm her libido, Zoey was still super frustrated that she couldn’t enjoy this right now, but she suddenly knew exactly what to do to help move things a lot so to speak.
Once quickly washed Zoey then turns the water up to make it warmer, washing off the soft bubbles to guide her hands over wet skin, which somehow manages to turn her on even more.
…so there truly was only one thing left to do, and whilst biting her bottom lip Zoey makes a quick decision.
Clicking the button twice on the shower head handle, Zoey picks it up from the slide bar attached to the wall and gets to work, with one foot balanced on the side of the bath her imagination runs wild as the fun begins.
Picturing Blake looking so hot fresh from the shower, of course she’d seen him in various stages of undress before but never that much, Zoey visualises him helping her right there in the shower.
Standing behind Zoey with one of his hands on her hip and the other between her legs, teasing her slowly which was something that she desperately needed, a loud moan escaping her mouth which was pretty embarrassing to say the least.
Moments later Zoey falls over the edge bringing herself quickly to orgasm, whilst fantasising about Blake who seconds later she hears him actually calling her name.
“Zoey, you er forgot your bag so I’m dropping it down by the door.” Blake states in a loud voice, which sounds even louder now the shower had been turned off.
Before Zoey can reply there is a soft clicking sound, which signals that Blake had closed the door again making her breath out a soft sigh, until a cold breeze of sudden realisation has her wondering…
Had Blake heard her moaning in the shower?
The answer to that was still pretty much inconclusive, because Zoey had obviously never bought it up of course, quickly leaving the apartment afterwards feeling all kinds of embarrassed from what had happened.
Glancing at her reflection quickly in the mirror above the sink, Zoey is thankful that her make up still looks good so after blowing herself a kiss for luck, she then pulls up the dress and takes off her black panties placing them on the side.
…then she quickly readjusts her dress catching the wicked glint in her brown eyes, one that was excited for the promises of things to come.
Because if this didn’t work then Zoey had no other choice than to actually leave, so long chance of finally ending this fucking dry spell, and rewriting the chemistry shared between herself and Blake on their terms.
Before she could overthink it anymore Zoey exits the bathroom with prize in hand, heading back towards the living room den where she luckily spots Blake by himself, whilst Karl was talking to Adam with both their heads dipped down low.
…neither of them even noticing her as she approaches Blake, with an excited look of anticipation crossing her features.
“Hey!” Zoey whispers sneaking up next to Blake, who looks down at her with a lazy grin on his face.
“All good-“
“I’ve got something for you, so hold out your hand real quick.” Zoey cuts off Blake with a playful smile, watching as he does as he is told which is sexier than it had any right to be.
“What’s this-“ Blake stops mid sentence when realisation quickly hits, making his jaw clench at the revelation, whilst Zoey stares up at him innocently as possible.
“Say something.” Zoey whispers to Blake in earnest, moments after placing her black lace panties, into his left hand which currently held onto them very tightly.
“You’ve broken me.” Jokes Blake looking down at Zoey with hooded eyes, plus no mistake that he had finally got the memo at last.
“No guy has ever said that-“
“Guys!” Shouts Blake in a gruff voice cutting off Zoey, to get both the guys attention as he then states “You two have to leave now like right now.”
“What’s the rush-“ Begins Adam with a loud huff aimed at Kyle, who just shrugs back in obvious confusion.
“Just go!” Announces Blake again in a serious voice, one which makes Zoey grin instantly.
Of course Adam notices her smiling and Zoey winks back at him playfully, causing the dude’s mouth to fall open in shock as she pokes her tongue out teasingly at him.
…clearly by this point now Zoey felt so ready for the next step, especially seeing how Blake was responding to her master plan so well.
“Don’t forget Zoey that if Blake doesn’t close anytime soon, come find us at the bar!” Adam calls out in a sing song voice, even throwing in some hand moves to show exactly how serious he was being right now.
Karl meanwhile just salutes Blake who hides his left hand behind his back, not very subtle like mind because Adam obviously notices that he’s holding something, but with a cheeky smirk he follows his drug dealer dude right off into the orange and pink sunset.
Silence finally reigns for a couple of moments as Zoey stares in the direction of the front door, biting her bottom lip in anticipation because they were finally alone, now they could hook up like Adam had suggested and both finally move on from this night.
Because sure due to the summer heat Zoey’s dress was stuck to her skin, but the air felt thick with something else and quickly turning round, she faces Blake noticing the look of pure unfiltered want on his face.
The one that he used often for staring at things like chicken tenders or jelly beans, and would’ve literally made her panties drop, if she was actually still wearing them right now…
Like the true bff that he is Blake offers to help out Zoey an old friend from college, who is currently in the middle of a ridiculous dry spell so the obvious answer to all of this, was of course for her to just go and hook up with Blake.
…because for one night only these two hot friends can have some fun together, with no strings attached just some specific ground rules and lots of tension instead.
{this story will be in four parts, with the third and fourth dedicated to all the smut & then there will possibly be a follow up story told mostly from Blake’s POV possibly…}
{Word count} 4.4K
{Warnings} 18 PLUS ONLY with mentions/scenes of the following: lots of tension, cute fluff and awkwardness, will mention height difference a few times, lots of longing, mention of hook ups, OFC is short, mentions of drink and in scene, friends with benefits, hook up for one night only, a preemptive one night stand sort of, scenes of fingering, oral sex, making out with Blake’s abs, sex in the biblical sense, p in v, different positions, Blake really can multi-task, aftercare, stuffed crust pizza and chill, scenes smoking weed…will add more if needed…
{A\N}
Picture this an AU Workaholics where the boys meet in college obviously, end up at TAC naturally but then the company went bust in their late twenties, now in their thirties Adam and Ders work as realtors together and Blake works several jobs still living up to his slacker lifestyle.
(Some of the above is mentioned in this story of course, but I wanted to also paint a picture to give the reader some idea of what the background of this fan-fic is about)
Despite living in their own places the dudes are still hella close of course with the addition of Zoey, someone else who Blake had met in college and stayed friends with because in this version Adam and Ders are basically the same maybe worse can’t tell, but Blake here finally has some game and a lil reputation as well.
{Story}
Zoey smiles stupidly to herself as she gets into the back of her flexi ride, despite this being a very bad idea she was still going to proceed with some caution, a bemused grin appearing right on cue as the car quickly drives off to her destination.
Straight on into the balmy evening that held both equal parts excitement laced with hints of nervousness, which was making Zoey tug constantly on her sunflower patterned sundress, the one that was way too short to wear to work but on a weekend it was absolutely perfect.
…the dress was usually something that Zoey wore on a night out to grab a guys attention, because this outfit made her feel both confident and super hot, despite the warm heat right now this was one of her absolute favourite things to wear.
The very reason why she was heading on over to Olympic was pretty normal, to see an old friend from college one who had offered her his help, because for one night only they would hook up together and hopefully not cause any rifts in their relationship.
…only nothing like this had ever happened between the pair ever before, unless you counted the embarrassing fumble back in college, something that neither of them ever liked to mention out loud of course.
Which is exactly why Zoey was feeling kinda nervous right now, because was this whole idea really good on paper, but in reality a literal waking nightmare she could never escape.
The very thought makes her shudder as the car passes by their favourite cinema, where herself and Blake have hung out together for years with mutual friends in tow of course, both Adam and Anders were guys who Zoey also had the pleasure of knowing since college.
…but Blake he was one of her oldest friends, they both really did know way too much about one another, yet them having sex would definitely blur the lines between that a little.
This whole idea had been fuelled by one stupid late night conversation at a dive bar, with both of them deliciously lubricated by various shots all lined up in a row, Zoey had soon found herself drunkenly opening up to Blake about her ridiculous dry spell.
…and how much it truly sucked because once she’d started talking, Zoey couldn’t actually stop herself from over sharing.
With over three months of bad dates in her pocket, she was drowning in a sea of embarrassing encounters in the back seats of cars, being ghosted by someone she worked with and of course getting slapped in the face by her blind dates girlfriend…
“So, what if I helped you out then?” Blake asks bluntly, once Zoey had finished teasing him, with her long list of embarrassing highlights.
“I definitely don’t need a pity fuck from you Blake.” Zoey retorts flippantly, wishing right then that she, hadn’t actually said a damn thing to begin with.
“I respect you too much for that obviously Zoey.” Begins Blake leaning closer on his stool, causing his knees to brush against hers as he continues “We can have one night filled with fun, and then just carry on being friends it’s really that simple.”
“I knew it!” Zoey shouts out with a loud laugh, one which makes Blake arch an inquisitive eyebrow in her direction.
“Knew what-“
“That even after all this time we’ve been friends, you still desperately want to sleep with me!” Zoey cuts off Blake with a drunken giggle, slamming her hand flat on the sticky bar in front of them.
“Oh, that’s exactly it! You’ve caught me out, because how have I been unable, to like resist your charms for so long.” Blake retorts sarcastically, as he winks at her with a wide grin on his face.
“Okay fine not always, but it’s awfully suspicious that you’re offering your sexual services to me now.” Zoey informs him with narrowed brown eyes.
“You’re missing a huge plot twist here Zoey.” Starts Blake with a lazy smile as he brings it on home by stating “I said for one night only it’s just sex, definitely enough fun for you to get out of your little funk.”
“You had me at plot twist.” Zoey nods with a laugh and a bemused shake of her head.
“Huge plot twist.” Blake states poking his tongue out playful, whilst Zoey proceeds to roll her eyes.
“Ok, fine let’s do this-“
“Really?!” Blake questions whilst choking on his drink then coughs as he adds “I was actually just joking.”
“What?!-“
“It’s good to know that you still think I’m hot though Zoey.” Blake cuts her off with a what-can-you-do shrug of his broad shoulders.
“When have I ever said-“
“You totally had a huge crush on me in college everybody knew it!.” Blake interjects in a deep voice, one that he rarely ever used on her, because this guy had a history of being a surprising flirt.
…one who somehow managed to get the babe, Zoey had seen him in action before but back then (read: five months ago), she’d actually managed to close all on her own without any help.
Returning back to the moment Zoey’s mouth drops open as she tries and fails to speak, words are unable to form on her tongue partly due to the alcohol she’d consumed, but mostly it was because Blake had actually been spot on correct with his assumption…
“Oh shit, your face that was so fucking funny!” Blake cuts off a shocked looking Zoey, as she tries and fails to hit him on the shoulder.
“Can’t believe that I really thought you were being serious!” Zoey declares closing her eyes as she feels her face overheat, whilst still blushing she then says hurriedly “I don’t have a crush on you now though!”
“Hey I was just teasing, because I’m honestly totally down to help a hot friend like you out with some naked fun!” Blake places a hand on her knee again, making Zoey open her eyes as he grins mischievously back.
“Okay, but if I have to fake it at anytime then I’m totally leaving.” Zoey informs him, with a very firm nod of her head.
“I love a challenge you know this.” Blake states in a deep voice again, one which makes her snort back stupidly.
“I can’t believe that we are even considering this-“
“It’s happening.” Shrugs Blake again with a playful smirk as he then adds “ But let’s quickly get back to the part where you officially admitted your gigantic crush on me!”
So Zoey was basically desperate and Blake was loyal if not optimistic that this would be fun, of course it had helped that over the years her friend had obviously become hotter she’d definitely noticed, but what if this blew up in their faces sure they flirted stupidly and were super close.
…but what if finally seeing one another naked was the breaking point between them, or worse than that what if Blake was actually really bad in bed?
These were questions that Zoey was about to find out seeing how she was nearing his apartment, Blake lived alone and many times she had stayed over in his little spare room, even sometimes only making it as far as his couch before she’d passed out usually drunk.
Beth her nosy but also amazing roommate had found Zoey’s friendship with Blake an enigma, she was a romance reader at heart so she saw between the lines, but besides the guy appearing once or twice in her one handed fantasises.
…nothing truly significant had ever happened between them, sure there were some wasted moments that random memories would awaken, but again neither ever spoke out loud about such things.
Until now of course as the car finally stops outside where Blake currently lived, a small walk up with four units in a pretty cool neighbourhood, right near the independent coffee shop where he worked as an assistant manager.
…Project coffee wasn’t a franchise so Blake could wear whatever he wanted, usually jeans with ripped tie dye tees and his hair in a ponytail or bun, Zoey especially liked the wire framed glasses that he wore at work too but that was a secret.
Zoey absolutely loved hanging out at Blake’s apartment, because it always seemed to cheer her up every single time she was there, and actually seeing the small building now from the car’s window was making her feel strangely relaxed.
Especially when she notices the large red double doors swing open, to reveal Blake complete with a boyish grin on his face when he spots her, how had she actually known this guy for over fourteen years that thought alone was truly wild.
“This is the part where you get out of the car now.” The bored male driver states in a dull sounding voice, one which makes Zoey roll her eyes in annoyance.
“Thanks for the instructions but I can actually take it from here.” Zoey responds flippantly as she exits the car, only to watch it quickly drive off whilst she stands completely still on the pavement.
On cue Zoey brushes some stray brown hair away from her face, quickly tucking it behind her left ear whilst she automatically tugs at her dress one last time, then turning round on her heels she spots Blake still watching her curiously.
Wearing his signature look of black sports shorts and an old white band tee, one that he’d cut up into a tank that shows off his Californian tan courtesy of the constant sunshine perfectly, broad shoulders and arms folded across his chest obviously completed the look.
…the ridiculous grin on Blake’s face was hella cute also but she would never openly admit it, and seeing how absolutely hot he was just standing there, now that was suddenly making Zoey’s body flood with hot hot heat.
Despite this even if her life depended on it Zoey would still deny it every single time, that she’d never had a crush on Blake regardless of her feelings, which were of course purely sexual and tonight she was going to finally put them all to rest.
Amen.
“What’s up Zo you nervous?” Questions Blake loudly, which makes her narrow her eyes back at him, as she starts to walk nearer to the low rise entrance.
“I’m just wondering if this is really my last resort, or could I actually drop any lower in the humiliation scale?” Zoey retorts with a scrunch of her nose, followed by a playful smile aimed right back at Blake.
“Oh you absolutely couldn’t drop any lower than me.” Blake begins whilst Zoey smirks betraying herself as he continues by saying “Remember this is the only chance, that you’re ever gonna get with me tonight, so definitely use it wisely.”
“I am a little nervous actually!” Zoey explains and then instantly regrets it, not wanting to make things awkward before anything actually happened.
“Well this is a safe space for you.” Begins Blake with a soft nod as he then states “But if this doesn’t feel right then we can stop, or if you’ve had enough we stop you are in control Zoey.”
“Thanks Blake I appreciate-“
“This is your night and I’m just here for the ride.” Blake explains with a wide grin on his face.
“Well I also bought my favourite vibrator along just incase so I’m all set!” Zoey informs him with a cheeky shrug, noticing the grin that instantly spreads across his face, when she stands in front of him.
…closer up Zoey could see the crinkles around his blue eyes, and his pointy canine teeth which Blake had nipped her with on the wrist one Halloween, the rogue memory always made her bite her own bottom lip quite firmly.
“That’s actually kinda hot about the toy we could-“ Before Blake could finish that sentence, two women both with welcoming smiles on their faces appear beside Zoey.
…neighbours from number four next door to Blake’s apartment, a married couple who Zoey had waved at several times when leaving here before, but she had never actually spoken to them until now.
“She’s funny!” Says the one with long white blonde hair, and a cheeky wink aimed at Zoey quickly confirming her suspicion.
…clearly having overheard what they had just said to one another, whilst she’d been staring at Blake’s mouth lost in her own sordid thoughts of course.
“Date night is it Blake?” Questions the other woman who has short black spiky hair, and thick rimmed glasses to match.
“We’re just friends-“
“Oh, please tell me that you are Zoey!”Cuts in the woman with glasses, who also shares that her name is Rhodes.
“Does this guy talk about me a lot?” Zoey questions with a smirk at Blake, who rewards her with one right back.
“Oh all the time you two have a lot of funny stories together, it’s actually so cute-“
“Excuse my wife she likes to gossip.” Interrupts Sasha with a laugh, as she then explains with a soft smile “ But to answer your question yes, Blake does in fact mention you quite often.”
“Thanks a lot Sasha.” Blake informs her whilst pulling a goofy face in the process.
“We met at college you know-“
“Of course you two did!” Grins Rhodes with glee as she cuts off Zoey, who gives them both an awkward smile right back.
“Anyway, it was lovely to finally meet you Zoey what an introduction, you guys have a good night then!” Sasha informs the pair of them, with a friendly smile on her face.
“Have lots of fun together with your toys as well!” Interjects Rhodes, with a playful grin on her face.
“You misheard us.” Blake explains as he awkwardly rubs a hand against the back of his neck, showing off his bicep muscles as he flexes his left arm of course.
“Well it’s only ever to be used in case of an absolute emergency anyways.” Zoey states back with a wink, whilst Blake chokes out a muffled laugh.
“Going by the noises that some of Blake’s guests have made, I’d say in confidence that you won’t even be needing it.” Rhodes states, which obviously makes Zoey’s eyes widen at the admission.
“Not that I’m bragging or anything!” Blake winks at Zoey with a smug grin on his face, whilst she still looks a bit shocked.
“I apologise again for my wife she’s been watching too many after dark Hallmark movies.” Cuts in Sasha as she nods to them both, and then with a small wave the pair finally head off through the red doors.
“That was a secret!” Rhodes mutters at Sasha, who just pats her playfully on the back with a laugh.
“I don’t think that either of them will remember-“ Sasha begins but trails off when Rhodes, starts waving her hands around animatedly.
“Well that was super awkward, yet also incredibly humbling.” States Blake with a humiliated snort.
“No way! I definitely love your neighbours more now!” Zoey replies with a laugh as she then quickly admits “I have actually waved to them a few times before, but I’ve never spoken to them.”
“They are truly something.” Begins Blake with a nod as he then states “ I can actually tell you more about them later.”
“Like you told them both everything there is to know about me?” Questions Zoey with a raised eyebrow.
“Sasha was just exaggerating.” Starts Blake with a smirk but then admits “ Although I did tell them about that one time with the water fountain in the park.”
“Oh, so you also told them that you had dared me to do it?” Asks Zoey with an embarrassed sigh, from the memory of that afternoon.
“Of course we were both drunk and you said that you could swim-“
“To try and get back to my place quicker because I wanted a nap, which still makes no sense.” Cuts in Zoey with a laugh, recalling Lara waiting for them both, outside of their own apartment block in a less nicer neighbourhood.
“Yeah we got day drunk at brunch, to counter a hangover that had been a lot of fun actually!” Blake laughs as the mention of that day, brings a cute dimpled smile to his face.
…whilst a specific memory of the night before that quite random Sunday, suddenly floods Zoey’s mind like a technicolour dream.
The pair of them had been out with friends at a club it’d been dark and very late, both of them dancing close together with him bopping her nose playfully, whilst she had taken off his black baseball cap and put it backwards on her head.
Blake had then proceeded to stare down at her with a cocky grin on his face, Zoey meanwhile was stuck in the moment and his blue eyes watching her dance as he proceeded to stand nearer, both of them lost in their own thoughts but neither was making the next move.
Despite the club being dark with blue and green lights illuminating their faces, it had almost felt as if they were the only ones there like in a daydream of their own making, the chemistry between them palpable almost like an actual living thing appearing in plain sight.
They had gotten so close together either by their own accord or from the busy crowd, Zoey couldn’t quite remember but she could recall the heated look on Blake’s face, the way his warm body was so near to hers with heat and something else practically enveloping the both of them…
Yet neither of them had ever mentioned how in that particular moment, something had very almost happened between them that night, but the point was now clearly moot seeing how this was gonna change pretty soon.
“It had been super fun that brunch but tonight is gonna be on a whole other level.” Blake informs her playfully, tugging at his long hair that sat messily below his shoulders.
“I hope so because it looks like I am the only one who has dressed up!” Winks Zoey finally walking past Blake, into the apartment block where she then heads straight for the metal staircase.
“You are looking really good Zoey, but don’t forget that those clothes won’t be on for very long.” Blake states from behind her Zoey hearing his footsteps getting nearer, as they both start to walk up the stairs.
“Is that a fact?” Questions Zoey with a giggle, as she continues with a shake of her hips, hearing Blake clear his throat makes her laugh.
“Well you are only here for one thing-“
“I just hope that it’s worth it.” Zoey cuts off Blake with both a statement and a soft sigh, peeking behind her at the top of the stairs spotting him grinning right back.
“If not there is the new Marvel movie on streaming.” Blake retorts with a slow roll of his baby blue eyes.
“Let’s just queue that up in case just to be safe.” Zoey nods with a wink, as she walks down the short hallway to Blake’s front door.
“Despite what they say about dudes, I am actually pretty decent at multi-tasking.” Blake begins teasingly as he then informs her “I’m particularly good with my hands too so I’ve been told.”
“I bet your neighbours would agree from all the noises they’ve heard.” Zoey replies flippantly whilst Blake grins back at playfully.
…seconds later he nudges her out of the way, so he can slowly open his green front door.
“Are you quite noisy then to Zoey?” Asks Blake with a cocky smirk appearing on his face.
“Only if I get to use my toy.” Begins Zoey with a laugh as she then adds “But first we need to set some ground rules, and I definitely call dibs on the remote control later.”
“So bossy, I like it!” Grins Blake stupidly as he steps to one side, letting Zoey walk into his place first.
Zoey heads inside then spins on her heels to face Blake in the open plan living area, poking her tongue out at him as he chuckles right back, she ignores him to look around the apartment which was cluttered but also was a very cosy time.
…it was always a fun place to be whenever Blake hosted a little fiesta, with lots of his friends and Zoey always dragging Beth along, who would have to try and avoid seeing Adam cause he was like a dog with a bone around her.
The apartment was open plan with a living room den and kitchen, two bedrooms one of which she was familiar with, and a large bathroom which was unfair because Zoey’s one was so tiny.
“Do you want a drink or something?” Question Blake making Zoey look back round, noticing the slow smirk appearing on his face.
“Some ground rules first.” Zoey counters back whilst watching Blake, as he picks up his green baseball cap holding it tightly in his hands.
“Let’s just have a good time, because like I said earlier if the vibe ain’t right, we can totally stop and order a pizza instead.” Blake explains with a firm nod, whilst shoving the green baseball cap over his curly mane of hair.
“With stuffed crusts?” Zoey questions with a laugh, when she clocks the look on Blake’s face.
“Of course.” Blake explains with a nod, as he softly bites the tip of his tongue cheekily.
“Ground rules for me would be that we obviously need to use condoms, absolutely no anal and please don’t go falling in love with me.” States Zoey ending with both a flourish and a smug smile.
“Yet you’re the one with the pretty obvious crush!” Retorts Blake his eyes dropping down to her lips, which makes Zoey grin even wider.
“I think that we should have some shots instead of spreading lies.” Zoey states with a firm nod, passing Blake she heads past a tall free standing shelf towards the kitchen area.
…which was covered in stickers, collectables, lots of cd’s but most of all, it held various issues of comics and thick graphic novels, some of which she had even been allowed to borrow.
Hearing her wedges clicking on the wooden flooring, Zoey stops to lean against one of the stools by the counter and takes them off, losing some well needed height of course but like Blake said she’d be out of this outfit soon enough.
…let’s be hoping because Zoey was getting warm again, and something told her that it wasn’t entirely the weathers fault for her body’s response.
Switching on the fan in the kitchen makes Zoey sighs to herself, she could easily stand here instead all evening with the cool air, blowing her hair around that and fallen out of the messy bun on top of her head.
“Let’s get this sexy little party started then shall we?” Questions Blake as he reaches for the vodka bottle, which lived in the corner of the kitchen counter.
“I’m ready!” Zoey nods grinning up happily at Blake, noticing like always the obvious height difference between them.
…with her reaching up to his broad shoulders spotting the look on Blake’s face, with him glancing down biting on his pouty bottom lip, which somehow makes her giggle as she catches his attention.
The air then suddenly becomes thick with anticipation between them, which makes a teasingly decadent warmth spread low in her belly, making Zoey quickly squeeze her thighs together damn this dry spell had made her literally desperate.
…hell it had almost ruined Zoey but like many times before, the guy in front of her had quickly swooped in, and yet again saved her from trouble because what were friends for.
…this feeling illicit’s an old memory, one that Zoey decides to follow for a distraction
to stop herself, from just standing there staring into Blake’s blue eyes.
“Hey, watch it!” Snaps a creep at the bar who Zoey had “accidentally” spilt some beer on.
“Oops! My bad.” Zoey cries sarcastically as she carries on through the busy crowd of people.
“Bitch, come back here!” Shouts the creep as he follows, grabbing onto her elbow which makes Zoey drop one of the drinks.
“Look what you did asshole!” Zoey shouts a little drunk, but mostly pissed that this guy had actually touched her.
“You need to apologise-“
“What’s happening here?” Questions Blake cutting off the idiot, the one who he had seen nudge Zoey quite hard.
“Your stupid girlfriend knocked her fucking beer on me!” The asshole shouts far louder than necessary, which causes people to look over.
“I think I actually improved your outfit of triple denim.” Nods Zoey conveniently ignoring the comment, the ridiculous one that heavily implied that she was Blake’s girl.
…never in this lifetime.
“Look it was clearly just an accident, but what I won’t allow is you touching my friend inappropriately.” Blake practically growls at the guy, which makes Zoey look at him.
….Blake being this angry about something was as rare as a triple rainbow in the sky, but Zoey notices the sharp flare of his nostrils as he stands his ground next to her.
“Oh I could do a lot of inappropriate things with this little missy-“
It happens in a flash Blake’s left hand clenched in a fist quickly connects with the idiots face, who looks shocked for a second whilst Zoey gasps clearly in alarm, but then the asshole gets his bearings again and punches him right back in the nose.
“Holy shit!” Zoey shouts handing the other beer in her hand to a random bystander, then she takes Blake by the arm steering him away as two security guys quickly appear for the denim douche bag.
Blake’s nose is gushing blood as Zoey roots around her purse for tissues, upon finding them she orders him to tip his head back, as she holds the tissue under his nose then he takes hold of her wrist tightly.
“Next time I’m getting the drinks.” Blake jokes sounding muffled, but his eyes are still playful.
“You’re my absolute hero!” Zoey hugs herself to Blake ,who wraps an arm around her shoulders pulling her nearer to him.
“Get a room!” Someone behind the bar shouts, but Zoey doesn’t reply because she has her face buried in Blake’s neck instead…
{part two}
Who else who writes Adrian Chase x reader insert stories is now thinking of something new to write, just to get the old juices a flowing again amongst others of course, the tags are soon gonna become chaos and I’m here for it…
Alright I guess I’ve been summoned! So for those of you who don’t know there is a miserable person on here coming after some of my friends and fellow Peacemaker fans over something as simple as X reader fan fics with our lovely Adrian Chase.
Instead of being mean and throwing back insults I’m simply going to continue to be everyone’s favorite hype girl and encourage EVERYONE to go follow and support my hardworking and amazing writer friends if you love Adrian Chase:
I’m so honoured to be on this list I haven’t even got a speech prepared…
In all seriousness the people in the PM fandom have a right to ship/pair who they want it’s a fan persons right to do so
BUT
What I don’t like to see either is others bringing meaningless bullshit (no usernames mentioned but ya know how I mean) and narrow minded agenda’s leave it all on Reddit not here!!!!!
(also if it made them feel better by blocking people bless them for thinking that has any impact)
WE LOOK AFTER EACH OTHER HERE🙏
Thank you @myguiltypleasures21 for the nod I know what I’m gonna do with my day head back into some fics🥰
The countdown has officially begun and I am so ready🙌cannot wait to see these babes again🎀
Just gonna rewatch the second trailer over and over till it’s here (I’m from the UK and apparently we get this the day after the US I hope to fucking god that’s true please)🙏