My problem is that I drive myself, but I do want to be wonderful, you know? I know some people may laugh about that, but itās true.
Once in New York my lawyer was telling me about my tax deductions and stuff and having the patience of an angel with me. I said to him, āI donāt want to know about all this. I only want to be wonderful.ā But if you say that sort of thing to a lawyer, he thinks youāre crazy.
-Marilyn in an interview with Georges Belmont, editor of the French magazine Marie Claire, 1960
Fame has a special burden, which I might as well state here and now. I donāt mind being burdened with being glamorous and sexual. I feel that beauty and femininity are ageless and canāt be contrived, and glamour cannot be manufactured. Not real glamour, itās based on femininity. I think that sexuality is only attractive when itās natural and spontaneous. This is where a lot of them miss the boat. We are all born sexual creatures, thank God, but itās a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift. Art, real art, comes from it- everything.
ā-
You know, when they talk about nervousness- my teacher, Lee Strasberg- when I said to him, āI donāt know whatās wrong with me, but Iām a little nervous,ā he said, āWhen youāre not, give up, because nervousness indicates sensitivity.ā
Also, a struggle with shyness is in every actor more than anyone can imagine. There is a censor inside us that says to what degree do we let go, like a child playing. I guess people think we just go out there, and you know, thatās all we do- just do it. But itās a real struggle. Iām one of the worldās most self-conscious people. I really have to struggle.
ā-
But when youāre famous you kind of run into human nature in a raw kind of way. It stirs up envy, fame does. People you run into feel that, well, who is she- who does she think she is, Marilyn Monroe? They feel fame gives them some kind of privilege to walk up to you and say anything to you, you know, of any kind of nature- and it wonāt hurt your feelings- like itās happening to your clothing. One time, here I am looking for a home to buy, and I stopped at this place. A man came out and was very pleasant, very cheerful, and said, āOh, just a moment, I want my wife to meet you.ā Well, she came out and said, āWill you please get off the premises?ā
Youāre always running into peopleās unconscious. Letās take some actors- or directors. Usually they donāt say it to me, they say it to the newspapers because thatās a bigger play. You know, if theyāre only insulting me to my face, that doesnāt make a big enough play because all I have to do is say, āSee you around, like never.ā But if itās newspapers, itās coast to coast and on around the world. I donāt understand why people arenāt a little more generous with each other. I donāt like to say this, but Iām afraid there is a lot of envy in this business. The only think I can do is I stop and think, āIām all right but Iām not so sure about them!ā
-Marilyn in an interview with Richard Meryman for Life magazine, 1962.
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