some coquette girlies
will byers stan first human second
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@prettypinkdiamond
some coquette girlies
but if you hold me without hurting me,
you’ll be the first who ever did
happily deluding myself into believing that when im skinny, she’ll magically come back into my life and fall in love with me 🥰
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖
september 11th, 2022: -89 cals
i felt so good after eating some shrimp cocktail soup today i went to the gym and burned more calories than i ate. rewarded myself with a frozen choco banana and still ended up with negative calories.
when i weighed myself this morning, i was 177 lbs, and i was happy but also kinda worried…
when u fast, ur body doesnt just eat fat, it eats muscle. my leg muscles have been feeling weird, and my legs are looking smaller. which i dont want bcs my legs are already freakishly small compared to the rest of my huge body, if i lose from there i will literally look like an apple on a stick. so i’ve gotta start going to the gym more and doing workouts that will keep my legs from atrophying while also burning fat from my huge pot belly…
september 6th - 10th: >300 cals
didn’t update bcs my period has been miserable and i’ve mostly been sleeping all day, but that just made it easy to stay under 300 calories every day :)
weighed myself this morning and i’m 180 now, which means i’ve lost 10 lbs since august 24th! i’m so fucking happy, but i’m not going to update my cw yet bcs i know my night weight isn’t 180. still, it was so embarrassing to be 190, my highest weight ever, so i’m glad i’m glad that’s done.
(if you’re wondering why my sw is 185 and not 190, i officially restarted this blog september 1st, and by that time i had already lost 5 lbs)
september 5th, 2022 - 0 cals
fasted like i said i would babeyyyy. im meeting a new friend in a few days, i pray to god they don’t wanna get anything to eat while we hang out 🙏🏼
The aesthetic ✨️♥️
📸: teutamatoshi
september 4th, 2022 - 510 cals
its too close to midnight and i am too enraged to edit up a pink mfp log, so heres my summary (purposely leaving out details bcs i’d die if the friend mentioned somehow found this).
i ate literally TWO things today:
around 3 pm-ish i wanted to try something new, so i ate this on-the-go snack pack thing (220 cals). didn’t like it and didn’t finish it but i always log full calories regardless.
THEN a friend unexpectedly invites themselves over. and this friend has a bad habit of:
september 3rd, 2022 - 0 cals
oops forgot to post my food log yesterday (i think the double dose of melatonin actually worked but im trying it again tonight to see if it was just a fluke) but i fasted so there are no calories to report. i feel so much better with an emptier stomach 💖
you can be the boss
*pushes up glasses*
according to my calculations, if i keep my net calories under 500, i can be near 160 lbs by halloween. i doubt i’m going to dress up bcs thats still embarrassingly fat but the thought of being smaller by then is still nice…
september 2nd, 2022 - 459 cals
cutting it too close to midnight to add my aesthetically edited mfp log here but in summary i had 859 calories and exercised 400 off. but i still feel enormously guilty about eating almost 900 calories of food so i might fast tomorrow 🙃
september 1st, 2022 - 271 net cals
anyone else feel guilty when their total calories for the day is over 500 even when you exercise yourself way lower? i try to remind myself that its better this way to avoid ending up skinny fat but it’s not like my ed listens to reason 🤷🏻♀️
anyways, getting back in the gym felt amazinggg. i was so tired when i got home, i fell asleep immediately. just woke up a few minutes ago and remembered i hadn’t posted my diary but once i’m done, im going right tf back to sleep lol.