It's my solar return today guys and seems like good day to let you all know that I'm starting anew on a diffrent handler so mutals new and old please follow me at the new hangout @gloomyjulliette
So I can follow you back π, the pinned post there should explain where my heads been at this whole time, princesseheart will still be around for archive purposes there's ALOT of memories on here and I don't wanna lose em but I also just need a fresh start yknow?
I'm glad they're bringing back the option to play as a Qunari for Veilguard, it's so fun walking around as a 8ft tall dragon man in Snake Eater body camo and having these people calling you the second coming of Crystal Dragon Jesus
the casual racism is interesting to see in DAI too including the infamous Solas scene where he's basically like wow ur so articulate and intelligent with magic never would've expected that from someone like you~! And you aren't given a good fuck you response to any of it lol.
Don't get it twisted I love playing my Treveyan since racially that is the most privileged PT, but there is something oddly fun about playing the underdog( especially since my personal canon for my Adaar is that he's very involved and interested in Elven magic and the Avvar A Vashoth and a Saarebas at that so just absolutely detested on both ends of the spectrum and just showing up the doubters? Very fun.
Got back on here to check notes and saw a bunch of folks reblog the Galazy Rangers intro lol. That era seems like forever go, it sucks I wasted that on a weirdo time waster.
het ships with blackΒ women typically end with one or both parties dying or with with the two not even ending up together at all by the end of the story, but Iβm supposed to just be satisfied with all the over-saturated het white/white ships because THOSE stories always get happy endings so itβs like the same and stuff. lol right.Β
Iβm also sick of fandoms throwing female characters they canβt vilify into wlw ships with another female character theyβve minimally interacted with, so they canβt interfere with with the aforementioned mlm ship, as if said femaleβs character arc or lack of character arc is only a problem when sheβs interfering with your ship.
More Sheva doods with the half-up-half-down spiky-y2k bun, im obsessed. It works alot more for the time period methinks and since nobody can stop me it is law.
some Shevas I like playing with hairstyles for her so long as you don't deviate TOO far from the original style it still fits me thinks, if she was gonna have it flat ironed I'm not sure why Capcom didn't have it mid length or do something literally more original than a basic ass ponytail, but I digress it was 2009...
πAuthors Noteπ: Ah ha, so under the cut is my first post of the year; that ficlet you all saw little blurbs from last year. The pairings Crave(Chris x Sheva) and boy has it been a long time since I've written so be gentle with me.π I've really always wanted some post RE5! Chris and Sheva interaction and the scenario has been on my mind for awhile taking form as this little thought experiment. It takes place after RE6 but before RE8. Let me know if you're interested in a continuation eh?
*I've also provided the optional audio above via a text to voice app of the reading for those who have issues.
It was bleak outside, gray; the clouds that lingered overhead teased rain but they never quite let a drop fall. She could feel the cool breath of the evening, emanating from the pane of glass from her window as she absentmindedly gazed at the streets below. Sheva Alomar had been preparing all week psychically and mentally for her upcoming mission on the island of Madagascar, Operation Orchid.
This mission was something personal, for so long she had been searching for leads on the incident that took both her parents, Umbrella had a decades-long foothold in the motherland, and she would see to it that Umbrella, Tricell, or hell any other bio-terrorism cell would no longer continue to destroy lives.
Per her briefing, the lead involved was keeping things very close to his chest. On the one hand, it pissed her off; because of course it couldn't be that easy, but she was willing to extend a shred of empathy as he seemingly only had this information as his sole bargaining chip. This man shrouded in mystery would be accompanying her on her mission in exchange for a complete expungement of his record, seemed reasonable enough but she'd hoped this wouldn't entirely be a dolled-up escort mission.
The soft glow of the streetlights outside filtered through the curtains of her well-to-do flat, -bought and paid for by BSAA of course- casting shadows on the furniture. Sheva, clad modestly in a plain black camisole with a pair of basic denim jeans, paced back and forth in her bedroom surveying the tactical gear strewn about on her bed, double and triple-checking her equipment while her thoughts raced. The all too familiar adrenaline rush before a big outing was to be expected but even with the incessant resurveying, it couldn't push back the memories that were starting to bleed inβ the feelings began to intrudeβ of missions shared with her ex-partner Chris Redfield.
She thought she'd compartmentalized that entire self-serving chapter of her life accordingly but those unresolved emotions she could feel gnawing their way back to the surface, reinforcing their presence via the butterflies in her gut.
He was in town. The twenty-three-year-old version of her the wide-eyed idealist and the young woman who was naive in matters of the heart would have girlishly thought; "He's here for me, to see me." But she was no longer that woman and she knew better than that, he was there for work, steadfast in his duty as a dedicated protector. Even after he'd been missing for months, worrying his sister-- hell worrying her to near death, even after a stint of short-term amnesia he conveniently told no one about, and losing Piers in China; she could feel him slipping away, walling himself off...occupying himself constantly with work.
She took her phone from out of her back pocket absent-mindedly scrolling through her messages until she saw his name:
Chris: Hey Sheva, in your neck of the woods next week for business. Mind if I swing by and catch up?
She remembered hesitating when she first saw the message, her thumb hovering over the keyboard. A flurry of emotions pushing back, dread, anxiety, relief, heartache...anger. A small part of her still hopelessly longing for the connection they once shared; the other part wanting to chew him out for ghosting and icing her out but then sending a message out of the blue after so much time had passed.
After a moment of contemplation, she had decided to respond.
"Sure, Chris. It's been a while. Swing by Friday evening? Round 6?...If that works for you."
Almost immediately, Chris's reply came through.
Chris: Understood. Six should be fine, looking forward to catching up.
He was never one to mince words, she honestly was shocked he had even sent a text in the first place, recalling a hazy pillow-talk session where he irritably groused about his distaste for it. But it was set and done and the pent-up tension came out on one haggard exhale as she arbitrarily slid the phone onto her coffee table.
Now here it was Friday evening, and she was standing there in her living room hating how it all made her feel. Was this all a mistake? Was she nervous? Angry?
She wouldn't have too much time to think about it as a knock on the door rattled her thoughts, jolting her back to the present. Sheva looked at her phone bewildered.
'5:45? Punctual this one. How could she forget?
Gathering herself, she approached the door; a soft exhale passing her lips as she hesitated slightly before opening it. Standing in the doorway was Chris Redfield, a rugged silhouette against the dimly lit corridor. His attire was rather morose not a hint of color, dark grays and blacks under a long coat. What was striking now was the silver cropping up slowly in his hair and beard, the faint beginning of all the wear-and-tear over the years, creeping up on his face. Still as handsome as ever though just with a bit more of a mature edge. Sheva couldn't help but set out for his eyes, they always betrayed him and she took a bit of pride in being able to find his tell, and when her eyes finally met his, for the briefest moment, the weight of unspoken words were laid bare.
"Hey," Chris said, his gaze breaking the line with hers, his voice low and gruff, a familiar warmth beneath the surface. "Mind if I come in?"
"Of course." Was all she could muster.
Sheva stepped aside, allowing Chris to enter. As he walked passed he still absolutely towered over her. The tension between them; already palpable, even after only a few brief moments a silent storm was brewing in the room. She closed the door, and as the latch clicked, the air grew even heavier.
"...I know it was on short notice, but thanks for having me," Chris said, his voice carrying a mix of formality and an underlying sincerity.
"Can I get your-" She motioned at the long trench-coat, trying her damnedest to keep up appearances.
Chris' eyebrows briefly rose quizzically and upon realizing what she was gesturing towards, he gently rejected the offer.
"-I won't be long."
Sheva winced just ever so slightly feeling her jaw clench, she led him into her living room directing him to the large sofa, while she took a smaller chair askew from him, and as they settled in, another bout of uneasy silence...
"So you wanted to catch up, let's catch up." her tone was cold, but her eyes burned and bore through him.
That didn't go unnoticed by Chris, a flash sideways glance in her direction turned immiedtly into a more defensive position, looking down and away.
"How are you? How have you been?"
"Busy...you know how it is."
"Yeah I do, in this line of work doesn't really afford much time for anything else..."
Sheva snatched her gaze away from him not responding.
Chris, ever perceptive, picked up on the palpable unease but decided to press on.
"I heard you transferred to a different branch," he remarked cautiously, choosing his words with care.
"Yeah, here in London." Sheva replied curtly. "Needed a change of scenery."
Chris nodded, his eyes studying her face for any hints of what lay beneath the cold exterior. "And how's that treating you?"
Sheva took a moment before responding, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Different challenges. More paperwork, less action."
Chris chuckled, a hint of nostalgia in his voice. "You always did prefer being out in the field."
A bitter smile played on Sheva's lips but silent she remained.
"...Heard you were soloing the operation in Madacascar."
Shevas brows furrowed a bit.
"And how'd you hear about that?"
Chris leaned back, his gaze steady. "Word gets around. You know how it is."
Sheva's expression remained guarded. Of course he'd know he was a founding senior member, but had he'd be asking around specifically? "I guess so."
Chris, sensing the need to tread carefully, continued, "Look, Sheva, I didn't come here to pry. I just... wanted to see how you're holding up, solo missions can be difficult y'know"
Sheva nodded, appreciating the sentiment but wary of the unspoken history that lingered between them. Chris searched her face again, his eyes running down her form, searching for cues she wouldn't vocalize.
"You have a partner on this mission?" he almost seemed just to blurt that out and almost immediately regretted how that might sound to her; yet he still glanced at her with a raised eyebrow.
Sheva's eyes narrowed at Chris' question, a flicker of irritation and suspicion crossing her face. She hesitated for a moment, debating how much to reveal, but then decided to keep it brief.
"It's classified." she replied tersely. "But, Chris please this isn't my first mission without you- without a partner". She hastily corrected. "I can handle this alone."
Chris nodded, understanding her need for discretion, a flicker of concern in his gaze nonetheless. "I know you can, Sheva. It's just... always safer with someone watching your back."
Sheva could feel her hands start to clench slightly. His concern was sincere; that she never doubted, but why now after all this time did he choose to sit before her?
"Is this your way of keeping tabs Chris? Making sure your conscious is clear hmm?"
He shook his head, his expression seemingly hurt and taken aback.
"Figured you'd know me better than that."
"Maybe a long time ago I would have; We were partners....a team. But things have changed...you've changed. "
Chris felt his shoulders tense up, his jaw clench, her response struck a nerve. "Sheva." He'd turned cold and stern. "We've been through this. We can't afford distractions in this line of work."
"Distractions!?" Her voice raised. She straightened her posture, turning to face him; eyes welling threatening to betray her actual feelings. She leaned in as if to extend her heartache towards him.
"No. Don't you dare..." You don't get to do this Chris! "You're the one who left." "You're the one who completely shut me out!"
"I had too!" He snapped, his face falling solemnly as he finally met her gaze.
"You are in danger when you're with me." " And I've lost entirely too many people I care about-" He stopped short; Sheva was watching him intently waiting with baited breath for what she assumed would be a poor excuse.
He was afraid that this would happen; but it was foolish of him to think this wouldn't boil over eventually; this was a conversation long overdue and he knew that at the very least he owed her an explanation...
"So do I just not get a say in any of this?" Sheva replied; a little despondent, the tears from earlier finally falling as she quickly went to remove them with the back of her hand.
"I fell in love with you..." He began, the words hanging in the air like a confession he never thought he'd utter; the softness in his voice amplifying the pain beneath the surface.
"Chris-" Sheva's voice was a soft plea, her eyes searching his, for the truth behind his revelation.
"And frankly, that scared the shit out of me," he continued, his tone laced with regret. "I couldn't afford that distraction. It compromised my judgment, my focus. I found myself questioning decisions, hesitating when split-second choices could mean life or death."
Chris looked up, meeting Sheva's gaze again, and in that moment, he felt like he couldn't remain seated any longer. He rose from the sofa, a mixture of sorrow and determination etched on his face. Closing the distance between them, he approached Sheva, kneeling before her; his hand gently cupping her cheek. His thumb tracing the path of a tear, wiping it away.
"You have no idea how hard it was for me to walk away from you Sheva; to walk away from us... but I had to."
Sheva's expression softened, the ice around her heart starting to crack as she absorbed the weight of Chris' internal struggle. The room felt smaller, the air heavy with the shared pain of a love that had been sacrificed.
"I could not... bear the thought of something happening to you because of me..." Chris continued, his voice now carrying the burden of regret. "Please. I just need you to understand that..."
His plea lingered, echoing in the quiet room, there was no more daylight outside, only the cold darkness of early nightfall and the street lights flickering from below.
Hestantily Chris removed his hand from her face, standing up he began walking past her just short of the front door; but not before stopping to look over his shoulder.
"While you're out there. One call, Sheva. Just say the word and I'll have a team there to back you up," he assured her, his tone conveying a mixture of sincerity and concern.
Sheva, still battling her emotions, felt a surge of frustration. Without thinking, she rushed forward out of her chair and grabbed the sleeve of Chris's jacket.
"Damn it, Chris," she muttered, her voice a mix of frustration and vulnerability. "You can't just waltz in here, talk about falling in love with me, and then just leave it at that."
Chris turned to face her fully, his expression softening. Sheva's anger faltered as she gazed into his eyes, and a silent understanding passed between them. In a moment of impulsive vulnerability, Sheva closed the distance between them, wrapping her arms around him in a comforting embrace.
Chris, caught off guard but not resisting, hesitated before bringing his arms up and around her to embrace her in return, one of his hands thoughtlessly caressing the line towards the small of her back a gesture that hearkened back to a more intimate time in their relationship.
"Look beyond yourself and your own fears for once, okay?" she whispered, her words muffled against his shoulder.
Chris stood there holding her, his resolve wavering more than he'd care to admit. The proximity reignited a familiar warmth within, and as Sheva looked up at him, her soft brown low lidded eyes and the curve of her lips drew him further in. He found himself captivated by the woman before him, a cascade of conflicting emotions welling up inside.
Against his better judgment, and against the voice commanding him to put duty over his desires; Those eyes; her eyes had him where he could no longer resist, he would gladly let her consume him. Chris tilted his head just slightly removing what little distance remained between them. Their lips brushing softly ;almost timidly at first, but then quickly increasing to a heated intensity that spoke to the true volume of unspoken desires they had tried so hard to bury.
Sheva sighed into it with longing and frustration, her hands wandering a bit aimlessly, almost like if she couldn't grab a hold of something she'd cruelly be woken up or he would turn to dust at that very moment. While Chris brought a more grounded energy to his ministrations, his hand moving to cradle the back of her neck, deepening their kiss. Her head was swimming, he expertly worked her body like he'd never left; the room seemingly spinning around them and the weight of the past; the tension between them fueling the passion of the moment.
Sheva pulled away tentatively; breathless.
"You're so selfish..." She purred, panting between her aches of desire.
Her words left his expression beckoning, he so rarely let slip the iron mask and only a precious few saw underneath it. Maybe right now, here with her in this moment he wanted to be selfish, let someone else be the superhero...
Sheva leaned into him, on her tip toes to reach; she brought slender fingers to trace the faint lines on his face, before trailing and then resting her hand on his chest. With eyelashes fluttered shut, she tilted her head back just slightly. He knew her body language intimately enough to understand the gesture; his lips seeking hers once more but with a carnal urgency that wasn't present earlier. Both their hands began to wander, tracing the contours of each other's bodies, fingers entwined in a dance that spoke of familiarity and longing. The physical connection reignited a fire that had smoldered beneath the surface, and for a brief moment, the world outside ceased to exist.
One of Chris' hands stopped on her hip to draw her closer, the other resting on her back while Sheva grasped at the collar of his coat eager to feel anything other than the material of his clothing.
But then, a sudden realization jolted through them. The intensity of the kiss, the wandering hands, and their intimate past collided with the stark reality of their present situation. He couldn't push it to the side long enough; just this once, he wanted to be careless and vulnerable, even if it was for the one night, even if it meant just for however brief he could indulge in pure unbridled happiness. He wanted her and she wanted him, but they both knew. He knew; it couldn't stay this way, not without him hurting her again and with that Chris pulled away, his breath uneven, his eyes locked with Sheva's.
"We-...We can't," he whispered breath still shaky, lust tinged with a mix of regret and urgency in his voice.
Sheva, her chest rising and falling, her grip loosening on his collar nodded in silent acknowledgment. The room was charged with unspoken words, and as they stood there, their faces mere inches apart, the weight of the impossibility of their connection hung heavy in the air.
Chris took a reluctant step back, breaking the intimate spell. Sheva's hand falling into his as if to weakly pull him back into her embrace. The silence lingered, and in that moment of clarity, they both understood why they couldn't continue further. The unresolved tension remained, a bittersweet reminder of the passion they had briefly allowed themselves to indulge in.
"I should go. Before, I do something I can't take back." Chris said, his voice barely above a whisper, his thumb grazing the soft delicate skin on the back of her petite hand.
Sheva nodded, her own emotions in turmoil. "Yeah, you should." She'd said that confidently but her hand still reluctantly pulled away from his.
As Chris turned to leave, the weight of sadness and regret began to fill the room. The line between duty and desire blurred for a moment, leaving them both grappling with the ghosts of what once was and what could never be.
"...Stay safe Sheva."
"...You too. Chris."
Chris nodded, closing the door softly behind him, and with that he was gone again. Sheva standing there alone with nothing left but the mission that awaited her, she would now have to focus on seeing that through till the end and leaving the past where it remain...
It's my solar return today guys and seems like good day to let you all know that I'm starting anew on a diffrent handler so mutals new and old please follow me at the new hangout @gloomyjulliette
So I can follow you back π, the pinned post there should explain where my heads been at this whole time, princesseheart will still be around for archive purposes there's ALOT of memories on here and I don't wanna lose em but I also just need a fresh start yknow?
