𝐉𝐔𝐃𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐖𝐒𝐎𝐍. An original character based on the story/lore of Far Cry 5. This blog will contain primarily adult content, please do not follow or interact if you are under the age of 20. Given the nature of the game, there may be a fair amount of triggering content. This includes but is not limited to: mentions of blood, death, violence, torture, religious extremism, murder, etc. PSD credit: creationcolors.
written by: Maya, she/her pronouns, 25+, discord is available upon request for mutuals only
carrd. | spotify.
Jude Dawson grew up on a small family ranch in the free state of Montana. Corporations had all but taken over the agriculture business in the state, but his family persisted, and as a result, struggled. Wishing to escape the ranch life, and desperate for something new, Jude turned to merc work among the numerous old towns that littered Western Montana. In 2068, the unrest around Rosalind Myer's election campaign presented a unique opportunity for Jude. Talk of unifying the free states with the NUSA once again had everyone on edge, and in order to prepare for the worst, an army was already forming to recruit and train volunteers. With most mercs being hired on to fight the NUSA, Jude found himself joining the army of the Free States to defend Montana.
During the unification war, Jude more than proved his grit as he went toe to toe with Militech super soldiers. His skills and aptitude earned him a spot on a special strike team (secretly funded by Arasaka) called the rangers, sent specifically to take out Militech holdings in Montana, Idaho, Washington, and eventually California. One of the perks of being on the strike team was access to advanced Cyberware he could have only dreamed of as a small town merc. Some of his upgrades included: specialized optics that made focusing down a barrel of a gun easier and quicker, subdermal armor, and gorilla arms.
During a mission in Night City, Jude lost his team in a strike gone wrong when the unification war was all but over. The loss devastated him, and though he wasn't the one to give the orders, he still felt partially responsible for the outcome. At the conclusion of the war, he was promptly offered a job in security by the newly restored Arasaka Corporation, but ultimately he refused. Instead, he wished to return home to his family's ranch in Montana. Turns out the quiet life wasn't so bad after all.
Once home, Jude discovered that during the war, the ranch had been burned down by a religious cult that had taken over most of the region, leaving his family murdered in the process. Seeing opportunity in tragedy, the burnt husk of a farm had been seized by Agricorps and now functioned under their umbrella. Homeless and jobless, Jude returned to Night City to carve out a new life for himself. Fresh from a war, he decided to use his skills on the NCPD force hoping to do some good on the streets. What he found instead was corruption and chaos left unfettered, with a police force that was spread too thin, and too easy to buy out. Though the force was one of the few organizations left that wasn't officially sponsored by corporations, it wasn't unheard of for police officers to be bought out to turn a blind eye here or there to shady dealings.
Jude's talents were wasted as a small time beat cop left to patrol Night City's streets, and given his cyberware and tactical ability, it wasn't long before came MaxTac knocking on his door. Jude soon found himself leading one of the many MaxTac psycho squads that keeps the streets of Night City safe--well relatively safer.
QUESTLINE:
At the completion of the Cyberpsycho sighting: the Wasteland, V will receive a message from Jude saying that he's heard whispers of their work incapacitating cyberpsychos throughout the city and has a job for them.
THE GAMBLER
If V follows up on Jude's offer, they will be prompted to meet Jude at the Mercado Sonora. Once there Jude will discuss with V the details of the job that he initially contacted them about. He'll express that it's something strictly off the books, which is why he isn't going to NCPD with this. He'll mention that he's heard talk of a small settlement outside the city of religious fanatics that call themselves 'the Project at Eden's Gate' (peggies for short). He needs V to gather some intel confirming their intentions, and stresses the importance that V not get caught or detected while gathering this information.
During the mission V can find various shards scattered throughout the warehouse and messages on the computer regarding the Peggies' beliefs and their influence in Montana, namely in a place called Hope County. If V successfully remains undetected and finds the intel Jude wanted, they will send the information Jude's way via a drop point. He will congratulate them on a job well done, and tell them to standby for further instructions. However, if V is unable to complete the mission stealthily, they will receive a call after placing the information in the drop point from Jude who berates them for drawing attention to themselves. Jude will then cut contact.
NEON MOON
If V successfully completed the objectives in the The Gambler, they will be contacted once again by Jude who wants to take down a Peggy settlement discovered from information gathered during The Gambler. The intel from the previous mission revealed the existence of a new drug destined to hit the streets of Night City called 'the bliss.' It's rumored to cause cyberpsychosis in its victims, and he needs V to help him stop this before it's too late. For this mission, Jude and V work together to clear a Peggy hideout deep in the wastelands at an old abandoned motel. V can either follow Jude's prompts to quickly and quietly take out the guards or go in guns blazing. From here, Jude and V will split up to explore different floors of the motel and keep communicating via the holo. Shards littered throughout the motel reveal archived conversations between the peggies and the wraiths about bliss distribution, different holdouts (including the previous settlement V visited), and most importantly, a list of ranches and their locations that the Peggies are interested in. This list includes a line 'Dawson Ranch: Acquired March 15, 2070.' V can also discover an encrypted message between Peggy leaders and Agricorp. Turns out the two have been working together to target small family farms and ranches in Montana, with the cult wrecking havoc on behalf of the corp in order to gain a foothold of their own in the region and fund their interests, while Agricorp gets full use of the land.
After some time, Jude will tell V that he's found where they're making the bliss and to come help him quickly. The two will promptly blow up the vats of bliss, and escape to safety. Once a safe distance away from any possible tails, Jude will thank V once again. V has the option to confront Jude about learning about a certain 'Dawson Ranch' that came under Peggy control, and ask him if the name is of any relation to him. From there Jude will reveal his past, and how the Peggies were responsible for the destruction of his family ranch. Hence why he couldn't bring this to the NCPD's attention, he needed to ensure that they were dealt with personally. V has the option of divulging the alliance between the Peggies and Agricorp if they successfully decrypted the message. From there the two will part ways once more.
GODS GONNA CUT YOU DOWN
A few days later V will receive another call from Jude, who's discovered that their efforts at the motel were not enough. Bliss has begun to hit the streets and he's seen at least three cyberpsycho attacks induced by the Bliss that week alone. Their previous mission alluded to a Wraith holdout at an old abandoned farm on the far edges of Night City, Jude suspects the Peggies are operating out of there and needs V's help taking them down. V can meet Jude at the farm and the two will work their way through the hideout, not one Peggy or Wraith spared in their path. What they discover is that not only is the hideout a front for producing bliss, but that John Seed--former corpo lawyer and a peggy faction leader--is there personally to oversee the production. Fueled by a need for revenge, Jude charges forward to deal with John. If V is able to help Jude in time, the two will successfully incapacitate John Seed, thus fulfilling Jude's need for revenge.
If V does not reach Jude in time, John will subject him to bliss causing Jude to enter a state of cyberpsychosis. Once a cyberpsycho, Jude promptly kills John and any surrounding Peggies before turning on V. From there V has the option to kill or incapacitate Jude.
If Jude is killed, V can contact the NCPD to come and collect his body. His MaxTac squad will come and collect him and ask V the details about the incident. If V incapacitates a cyberpsycho Jude, they can call MaxTac or they have the additional option to call Regina Jones to come and take care of him.
If Jude and V successfully killed John Seed, together this will prompt a separate potential romance mission for Jude.
RAMBLIN MAN Mission dependent on the outcome of the Gambler.
If V failed to successfully complete the first mission, they will get a call from Regina Jones about a cyberpsycho wrecking havoc at an old abandoned motel in the wastelands (the same motel as the one in Neon Moon), and that she needs them to get there before MaxTac arrives. Once there, V will find Jude in a state of cyberpsychosis. Conversation shards will reveal that he tried to take on the hideout alone, and was captured in the process and subjected to bliss exposure causing his breakdown. Like any other cyberpsycho, V can either incapacitate Jude or kill him. In the end, Jude's MaxTac squad will swoop in and either take Jude back for reconditioning or to deal with his body.
CARRY ON WAYWARD SON
Potential romance mission
If V is successful in assisting Jude with killing John, they will get a call to come join him and a few buddies at a bar in Santo Domingo for a drink. After spending time at the bar and exchanging a few war stories, Jude will prompt V to follow him to the rooftop where they can see the cityscape lit up from there. He will once again thank V for all that they've done to help him, and that they always have a spot on his squad if they ever want to change careers. Jude will offer V an iconic weapon, an old sniper rifle called 'Eagle Eyes' from his days serving in the Free States army. From there V can kiss Jude, thus triggering his romance.
❝ it’s wanting that gets so many folks in trouble. ❞
❝ it ain’t no secret i didn’t get these scars falling over in church. ❞
❝ if you win power, remember why you wanted it. ❞
❝ you do a man wrong, he’ll shoot you for it. you do a man right…well, he still may shoot you for it. ❞
❝ trust me. there’s things you’re better off not knowing. ❞
❝ you remind me a lot of myself. how i used to be. stubborn and angry. ❞
❝ i hope you will give me some warning if you get the sudden urge to kill me. ❞
❝ my side wasn’t chosen. my side was given. ❞
❝ a little sore, but apart from a couple extra scars, it will be as nothing happened. ❞
❝ i don’t think you’re a bad person. a little stupid perhaps, but not rotten. ❞
❝ i certainly don’t mind you asking, if you don’t mind me not telling. ❞
❝ you are being deliberately obscure as a substitute for having a personality. ❞
❝ so do tell me, have you needlessly risked your life since we last spoke? ❞
❝ i came into this world fighting. and i’ll go out of it fighting. ❞
❝ i hear you speak and suddenly i'm reminded of how the people i respected most in my life had a problem with authority. ❞
❝ you're looking much better. considering you were almost buzzard food a couple days ago. ❞
❝ power is like a drink. the more you have, the more you want. ❞
❝ people don’t forget. nothing gets forgiven. ❞
❝ sometimes in the service of what is right, you got to do terrible things. ❞
❝ you have quite a story. i really am a little jealous. ❞
❝ old friends make the worst enemies. ❞
❝ i had everything, and gave it up in the pursuit of nothing. ❞
❝ hah. you were always bad at lying. ❞
❝ i’m not going to stand by and watch good people suffer. ❞
❝ some trees flourish, others die. some cattle grow strong, others are taken by wolves. some men are born rich enough and dumb enough to enjoy their lives. ain't nothing fair. you know that. ❞
❝ if you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging. ❞
❝ now, if you don't mind, i'd hate to spoil such a beautiful afternoon on such beautiful land with any further unpleasantries. ❞
❝ i, too, have a family, friend. and so that we may see our families again i suggest we part ways amicably. ❞
❝ sometimes i tell myself that everything happens for a reason. ❞
❝ i see the good in everybody. it’s a flaw of mine. ❞
❝ well, try not to get yourself killed. ❞
❝ see if you can keep your gun holstered for once. ❞
❝ i don’t pay much attention to rumors. ❞
❝ i swear, if it was down to me, i’d never have gone anywhere. ❞
❝ lock all the doors. whatever happens, don’t come outside. you hear me? whatever happens. ❞
❝ what would you care? i’m just a nuisance to you anyway. ❞
❝ i’ve been hearing some things about you. ❞
❝ i would rather be dead than a cynic like you. ❞
❝ damn, a little gratitude wouldn’t kill you. ❞
❝ trust me, i ain’t no hero. ❞
❝ as it turns out, it's you or me. the way i see it, might as well be you. ❞
❝ you live in a dream world. it ain’t like they tell it in books. ❞
❝ i’m asking you to do what i say, before you get yourself killed. ❞
❝ those who sit on the fence make a choice…in their own way. ❞
❝ i’d do anything for you, you know that. ❞
❝ better watch your mouth, my friend. i've cut out a man's tongue for less. ❞
❝ there's nothing worse than a nobody thinking he's a somebody. ❞
❝ you got it all wrong. i’ve always loved you, even now. ❞
❝ what the hell were you thinking, going off on your own? ❞
❝ first impressions are hard to erase. ❞
❝ it’s a long story. too long to tell without a drink in my hand. ❞
❝ i’m not angry. i’m disappointed. ❞
❝ you know me. i’ll be late to my own funeral. ❞
❝ that tone of voice ain’t so becoming on you. makes you seem all pent up and angry. ❞
❝ you think i don’t know who you are. ❞
❝ why don’t i get a warm and tender embrace? ❞
❝ what do you want me to say? yippee? ❞
❝ there’s always a choice. you’re just too blind to see. ❞
❝ you’re not ready for that yet. one step at a time. ❞
❝ every time you go off, i worry you’re not coming back. ❞
❝ it didn’t have to be this way. ❞
❝ come on now. try to look on the bright side. ❞
❝ after all i taught you…i’m ashamed. ❞
❝ it’s easy to make promises you can never keep. ❞
❝ we all make mistakes. i never claimed to be a saint. ❞
❝ how does it feel to kill hundreds of men in cold blood? ❞
❝ it ain’t the first time i had a gun to my head. ❞
❝ you’re not perfect, and i’m sure not. but you’re better than they are. ❞
❝ you alright? you’re not hurt, are you? ❞
❝ this really couldn’t have gone more horribly wrong. ❞
❝ you’re just like me. you can’t change who you are. ❞
❝ my whole life, all i ever did was fight. ❞
❝ you’re in no position to make demands. ❞
❝ the bright side? there ain’t no bright side. ❞
❝ my heart’s beating like a drum. ❞
❝ are you sure you’re alright? i mean, i know all that business must have been hard on you. ❞
❝ you’ll make me blush with all these kind words. ❞
❝ i never took you for the jealous type. ❞
❝ come now, you’re stupid, but you’re not that stupid. ❞
❝ you’re weak. you always were. you never had the stomach for this. ❞
❝ seems real quiet, don’t you think? ❞
❝ you were always a hard and nasty man. ❞
❝ see, i have nothing but your best intentions at heart. ❞
❝ don’t talk about things you don’t understand. ❞
❝ i guess there’s only one room for one hero in this family. ❞
❝ for a wise man, you are a really stupid man. ❞
❝ what would have happened if i hadn’t come along? ❞
❝ you must have mistaken me for someone else, friend. ❞
❝ you ain’t very talkative, are you? ❞
❝ we cannot be too careful. the world is very dangerous. ❞
❝ no, i’m not okay. do i look like i’m okay? ❞
❝ you are so tense all the time. come, let’s have some fun! ❞
❝ i will stay and fight. i am ready to die if necessary. ❞
❝ i know i can’t change the past but i’m sure gonna do something about the future. ❞
❝ i’ve given you no reason not to trust me. ❞
❝ choose your tone rightly. remember who you’re talking to. ❞
❝ there are guards everywhere. if they see you, they will kill you. ❞
❝ it was nothing. i’m not a kid any more.❞
❝ a lonely, forsaken place. some people say it’s haunted. ❞
❝ i’m not sure your idea of paradise and mine are the same. ❞
❝ maybe if you were more cordial to folks, they’d be better inclined to help you. ❞
❝ i’ve been in far worse situations. ❞
❝ you have the exterior of a violent man, but the soul of an angel. ❞
❝ you’re not gonna pass out on me, are you? ❞
❝ you’re no better. how many men have you killed? ❞
❝ stay alert. something doesn’t feel right. ❞
❝ i'm going to hand you over to them and watch them tear you limb from limb…i'm just kidding. ❞
❝ you love to talk badly of other people because it makes you feel better about yourself. ❞
❝ it’s been a pleasure spending time with you. ❞
❝ that’s a lot of sacrifice. i just hope it’s worth it. ❞
❝ i’m not cut out for this. no, not cut out for this at all. ❞
❝ i don’t need you to show me. ❞
❝ men are born, and then they're formed. at least, that’s how i see it. ❞
❝ a little flattery…now we’re finally getting somewhere. ❞
❝ i thought you were supposed to be fearless. ❞
❝ you are a man who has lost his spirit. ❞
❝ if you were less secretive, people might be more inclined to trust you. ❞
❝ me mean me no harm? this is funny. what harm could you do to me, exactly? ❞
❝ come on, after everything we’ve been through, i think we can trust each other, don’t you? ❞
❝ i can’t rightly believe it. just like in the books. ❞
❝ i didn’t ask for your help back there. i owe you nothing. ❞
❝ be careful. what’s stopping me from killing you? ❞
❝ one day, i promise you, you’re gonna regret this. ❞
❝ you know i’ll do whatever i can, but i have problems of my own. ❞
❝ what would you know about leadership? ❞
❝ you make a choice by not making a choice, you know. ❞
❝ hold your excuses until you figure out which one to use. ❞
❝ i'll give you a bad case of "someone just shot me in the head" if you don't hurry up. ❞
❝ being honest though, this tastes bad enough to kill a man. ❞
❝ do i look like i need saving? ❞
❝ sarcasm should be beneath a man such as you. ❞
❝ are you always this stupid or are you making an extra effort today? ❞
❝ i don’t like to kill a man on his knees, even if he deserves it. ❞
❝ don't forget you need me more than i need you. ❞
❝ i’ll hunt you to hell and back. ❞
❝ you’d best not be lying to me. ❞
❝ let's get going. before the weather gets any worse. that sky don't look good.. ❞
❝ thank you for telling me all that back there. it must have been hard for you. ❞
❝ i know we ain't exactly old pals, but…have i ever done you wrong? ❞
❝ your nobility's almost as affecting as your naivety. ❞
❝ you are a romantic who wants to be a cynic. ❞
❝ i apologize if i seem to be prying. ❞
❝ strange place for a decent person to visit, if you don't mind me saying. ❞
❝ well, you must admit…it's an unusual start to a friendship. ❞
❝ i can’t really say i understand you. ❞
❝ every man has a right to change, a chance of forgiveness. ❞
❝ hello, old friend. it’s been a long time. ❞
❝ i hope you understand now why i've been playing my cards somewhat close to my chest. ❞
❝ nobody made my path but me. ❞
❝ it’ll be a piece of cake. trust me. ❞
❝ oh, don’t be so deliberately enigmatic. ❞
❝ my word, what a difficult life you’ve lived. ❞
❝ you have a strange sense of humor. ❞
❝ stay and fight me, you coward. ❞
❝ i ain't planning on staying very long. ❞
A member of the 75th Ranger Regiment who eventually becomes a staff sergeant, Jude leads his squad on multiple missions overseas. His squad becomes a second family to him. There's nothing he wouldn't do for the men he leads and vice versa. This loyalty is tested when a bad call from senior leadership leaves his men in a situation with nearly impossible odds while he and a fellow squad mate provide overwatch. Rather than sit there and watch his team get picked off, Jude leaves his post to assist his men on the ground and gets caught in the crossfire himself. He's only saved due to the efforts of his squad mate, and together they're able to save the only team member who remains alive.
After losing his team, Jude bears the guilt of his squad members' deaths on shoulders. And while a part of him understands there was little he could do to change the situation or the call that was made, he feels responsible. Nearing the end of his contract and given leave to return home, Jude's left with the decision to stay in the Army or end his career. But it's far from a happy reunion. He soon discovers that his brother and his budding family are set to inherit the ranch instead of him, in spite of his efforts to restore his reputation. With little left for him to stay in Montana, Jude decides to remain in the Army. Over the years Jude continues to execute missions with a new squad, until he's once again faced with an all too familiar situation. Forced to send his team into a losing battle, and with little resources to save them he and the few survivors exfil to safety.
Burned once again by the choices of his leaders, Jude leaves the service at the end of his contract. The adjustment to civilian life is a struggle. Though he keeps busy by working on his family's ranch, it's a stark contrast to the work he'd been doing for almost twenty years. So when a friend from his first squad tells him about the opportunity to join an elite PMC, he jumps at the chance. Jude joins the Shadow Company as a sniper. Utilizing all the skills he learned in the Army, he often provides overwatch on the ground during missions, and assists multiple units in specialties ranging from reconnaissance to combat. Though his work in the Shadow Company hardly erases the scars of the past, it feels good to be a part of something bigger. He genuinely believes the work they do makes the world a safer place at the end of the day. However, the events in Las Almas leave a bitter taste in his mouth. Though now weary of contractors and the spheres of influence which command them, he is recruited to join another PMC. After a brief return home, and another poor attempt to join the civilian world, he ultimately decides to become an operator for SpecGru.
IT ISN'T SHAME THAT KEEPS HER FROM MEETING HIS GAZE, BUT RATHER AN IMMENSE FEAR OF REJECTION. their values, their opinions, their everything differed so vastly. this was no secret. but she often chose silence over confrontation these days, opting to ignore his goals and desires for the end of this war. maybe it was naive to want something different, to want change in the middle of this story, rather than the bitter end.
her eyes focus on the pictures scattered across his tabletop, all displaying her in compromising positions. WHO WAS WATCHING HER? jude didn't have the time, nor the doubts in her to do so. her first and only accusation was directed at adam decker. he had something against her, a burning hate that she'd never seen before now. even her enemies, even jacob seed himself, didn't look at her like that. much like the way jude was surely looking at her now.
❝ YOU KNOW, I'M SURE SOMEONE OUT THERE HAS A SIMILAR OPINION ABOUT YOU. there's someone out there that doesn't think you're worth saving, that you deserve anything other than death. you think you're different? you think just because something horrible happened to you, to your family ... gives you a pass to shed blood? when do two wrongs make a right? do you wanna take his family from him? do you want to make him feel like you? what happens at the end of that? do you think it's all going to go away? ❞
her voice doesn't shake, even in the face of his anger. though the feelings between them have become more and more apparent, neither of them have made it real. their relationship is a giant question mark on a blank piece of paper, and yet there's something inside of her that aches at the idea of him expressing this anger, this betrayal, whatever this is towards her. eve chews at the bottom of her lip for a moment, anxiety becomes a looming threat in her chest.
❝ i killed jacob seed. i got my revenge. it broke me more than i've ever been broken before - it's a tidal wave i can't catch my breath from. i can't sleep, i can't eat, i can't breath without thinking about it. without thinking about him. without wanting to go back and change my mind. i can't live with myself. even if he was the worst person, it wasn't my place to take a life. it wasn't my choice to make. killing john isn't going to solve anything but soothe a temporary wound while the real problem is festering inside of you. ❞
she looks him in the eye now. ❝ i don't know what you want me to say, jude. i'm not going to apologize for feeling the way i do about this whole thing, for wanting to make a difference, for wanting to change the tides. i didn't tell you i was doing any of this because i knew you'd react the way you're reacting now. but if you're going to sit there and believe whatever story adam spun, there's no changing your mind. condemn me, everyone else has. ❞
HER WORDS STING FAR more than he cares to admit. They were reminiscent of a time before the reaping, when they had worked together at the sheriff's office. Out of place within whatever truce they had come to now, to what he had understood was at the very least a friendship. More than that? Well they hadn't quite formally discussed that part yet, despite the obvious change in their dynamic these last few months.
He had defended her against threats and accusations alike from within their own ranks. Had trusted her enough to reside under the same roof, enough to share the same bed together. He had allowed himself a measure of vulnerability with her that he had not afforded to anyone else since the reaping. If he was being honest, he hadn't let down those walls he'd built for anybody in years, even before the reaping. And this is where it left him. Maybe that's why it bothered him so much. That the unsaid nature of whatever they were now had left obvious holes in what they considered the other to be. Her little liaisons with John Seed felt no better than if he'd been cheated on, even if the two of them had done nothing more than talk from what Jude could tell.
But perhaps the most damning part was that there was a measure of truth in her words: he wanted the entire Seed family to burn, and John with it. He'd stop at nothing to make that man suffer, to feel a fraction of the pain he'd been through after he'd killed his family and used their bodies as little more than lawn ornaments. He'd be lying if he said there weren't nights where the sins of his past came back to haunt him and he wondered if he'd become no better than the very monsters they were fighting. Thoughts he'd never admitted out loud that she was now giving a voice to. He had become a vengeful, empty shell of his former self, and that made him no better than the enemy in her eyes. He dare not ask the question that had begun to form a pit at the bottom of his stomach: do you think I'm not worth saving? He knew he wouldn't like the answer.
Instead he keeps his focus on the betrayal, it was only slightly easier to accept than her certain condemnation. " I take it you're not going to apologize about lying to me either then. " He continues to try and meet her gaze, and the fact that she refuses to return it frustrates him even more. " Listen, we can sit here and argue on your philosophy about killing people all night long but that don't change the fact that you lied to me. That you snuck around behind my back, walked right into enemy territory, and sat down to have a little chat with them, as if we aren't actively at war with the Seeds. I've defended you from day one, almost everyone else thought you were a traitor, that they'd had planted you within our ranks to feed information to the peggies and tear us apart from the inside. But I trusted you, I trusted you as my partner, as my friend--" He breaks off, not knowing quite how to finish the rest of that list or to label what they had become these last few months.
" You should know by now that I don't give a fuck about what Adam says, but this? These are pretty hard to argue with. " He gestures to the pictures on the table, his voice had risen in volume the more he spoke betraying the true depth of how deeply she'd wounded him . " For God's sake, Eve, the least you can do is look at me when I'm talking to you. "
WHEN DO THEY DRAW THE LINE BETWEEN THEMSELVES AND THOSE THEY CALL ENEMIES? perhaps the reaping was a means of shining a light upon the monsters they all have within themselves, another intricate detail weaved into the chaos by the father himself. she wonders if this was part of the plan, this realization that they're not much different from the people they killed in the name of retribution. even now, eve stands upon a hill of death, sinking and sinking into the abyss. who is she to tell him what is right and what is wrong? they've both lost so much. but she can't avoid the hesitation before pulling that trigger, before signing away another life in this endless war. there's a part of her that wonders if there will ever be an end to this, even if they killed the seeds and restored a sense of order to hope county. will they ever be free of the death they inflicted upon this land? will they ever recover from all they had lost? will killing john seed bring back his family? there's an ever looming response, one that she's too afraid to face now.
❝ what happens when you kill him, jude? you think that's going to fix everything for you? for everything we're going through now? at the end of the day, it's another life lost. the war still goes on, nothing changed. killing him isn't going to heal those wounds, revenge isn't going to make your family come back. ❞ she heaves a deep sigh, turns her attention to something moving outside the window. anything but facing the consequences of her words. anything but looking him in the eyes.
❝ when do you draw the line, when do we say enough is enough? killing everyone who thinks differently than us .... it's not going to solve our problems. but, i don't know. maybe it's foolish of me to think that, maybe --- maybe i can make a difference another way. maybe i can change their minds, make them see differently. i'm not foolish enough to think that he's going to turn his back on his family, but he was manipulated by joseph seed too. he had a life before all of this, he was his own person. he wouldn't have made these choices, taken these things from you, if it wasn't for him. maybe, at the end of this, he goes to jail. he answers for everything he's ever done. but i just don't see how killing him is the right answer. death and more death. if we kill our way through all of this, nothing will be left. just us and this graveyard we've built together. ❞ @deputyzed
FROM THE MOMENT HE'D discovered her secret to now, he knew little more than the fire raging inside his brain, a blaze of emotion that threatened to consume. From anger, to hurt, to grief, to betrayal, he had cycled through his emotions over and over again in a constant loop until she walked through the door of his home and everything came to a head. They had been fighting Eden's Gate for over a year now, with few small victories to claim and even fewer people whom they could trust. Jude had thought he could count Eve among those people, hell, he had even invited her to live in his home. Only to discover he'd been housing a traitor this entire time. Pictures of her consorting with the enemy, waltzing right into his home and having a pleasant conversation with John Seed were scattered along his coffee table. As if the man hadn't been responsible for the current chaos which was unfolding around them. Now, he wasn't quite sure which was worse, the evidence placed before him, or a knife to the back.
" So I'm supposed to just sit here and feel sorry for the man because he has a shitty brother? He still had a choice. Even if Joseph manipulated him, hell even if he held a gun to John's head and told him what to do, that doesn't change what he did. Either you're blind or you're just choosing not to see it, at this point I'm not sure which is worse. He's destroyed so many people's homes, wiped out entire families, he's killed children, Eve, and I'm just supposed to forget about all that and make peace? " He barely conceals the rage boiling within him, a quiet seething thing that is reflected in his eyes as he attempts to meet her gaze, but she wouldn't even do him the courtesy of looking him in the eye.
" Killing him won't bring back my family, I know that damn well better than anyone else considering I was the one that buried them, but I wouldn't have had to bury them if it weren't for him. This isn't about revenge, this is about survival. Can't you see? There's no option here other than to kill or be killed. I know you're not a killer, and this entire fucked up situation forced you to become something you're not, but it's all that we've got right now. Who's coming to save us? The National Guard? The Army? Look around, Eve. We're all on our own. Don't be so naïve to think that we can all just sit around the campfire and sing kumbaya after all this is said and done. "
horses are an integral part of life at the dawson ranch. growing up working cattle jude’s ridden and owned quite a few horses, his most recent being his mare cinders, a bay roan american quarter horse. though cinders is still a little young (6 years old at the time of the reaping) she’s reliable and faithful. blue is jude’s younger sister’s horse, a blue roan gelding, that is also an american quarter horse. though he’s getting up there in years (about 18 years old at the time of the reaping), he’s as gentle as they come and still got some spark in him.
