Violent condition

just say that YOU love me alone and silent face to face just say that YOU need me those words that swallow this empty space. SHADOW RP BLOG. AU. READ PAGES.

[ilikerunningbetter]

After blowing on the hot chocolate within the mug, Sonic took a few long slurps before holding the mug into between his knees as he stared at the ground. I’m not even sure what makes me happy anymore, Shadow.

He sighed, someone really special left me ‘n’ since then everything’s just drained from me, man. I’ve always been free, or at least I thought I was but… Ever since she went I’ve felt like that maybe I wasn’t free all along, maybe I needed her 'n’ she made me feel free?

I dunno.

I like everything you do for me. I really like it, but what if I’m just desperate for attention? For someone to fill her role in my life? Only, you’re a lil more extreme with that role. She never brushed me or anything like that but…

If I let myself have that, not only would it hurt you if you are just a replacement, but it’d be wrong. I’ve told you before, but people aren’t that accepting of people walking around with other people with collars on and claiming they’re theirs.

I don’t know, Shadow. I just don’t know anything anymore.

[projectprototypal]

Shadow listened quietly, before gently placing his hand on Sonic’s arm -- tentatively, as if he was afraid the blue hedgehog would run away. 

I want to help you. You’re sick. And it seems like you’ve been sick for a very long time...

I want you to be able to discover what you want, who you are, and where you want to go. Even if you’re not mine I want this for you. I think, maybe, it’d be easier if you were mine, but...

I’m not going to force you. I don’t mind being used; that’s all I’ve been my entire life. But I don’t want to leave you alone, especially when it’s clear that you aren’t happy.

If you want to, we can give it a chance and if you find it doesn’t satisfy you, then you can tell me and I’ll leave. I can even let you think it over. You don’t have to give me your answer right away. But...at least let me help you a little bit. Get you outside sometimes and give you food to eat... I don’t like seeing you hardly eating and never leaving your bed. I’m not a mortal like you are but even I know that’s not healthy.

[ilikerunningbetter]

I had a headache… I didn’t mean what I said, I just…

I’m sorry.

Yeah, I’ll take it.

[projectprototypal]

Shadow gave him a small smile as he handed the cup to Sonic to take.

It’s okay. I understand. I was a little hurt, but...I know you’re not feeling well. 

He fell silent for a moment, before continuing quietly, I want this to be something that you want to do. I know I’ve behaved in desperation in the past about it, but...in truth, I already have the Chaos Emerald, and I’m already feeling much better than I was before.

I want to take care of and protect you. I want you to be mine, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. I just want you to be happy, beyond all else... 

He glanced at the floor. If being mine doesn’t make you happy, then it’s better that I let you go. Perhaps I was...too eager in the beginning. To have something, to have someone, of my own.

[ilikerunningbetter]

projectprototypal replied to your post:Sonic..? I brought you some hot chocolate. I was…

… If you don’t want me to be here, it’s okay, but can I at least give you the hot chocolate first?

No… I want you to stay, I’m just confused, man. I was an ass to you yesterday.

[projectprototypal]

I was probably bothering you and you’re still sick.

...Do you want it?

[goggleheadmark2-blog]

-All that suspicion drained out of Daisuke as he watched the creature tremble before him, those large ears of his pinned down as whatever strength the creature held normally seemed to drain out of him. If he was a threat he would have kept his guard up, right? Not that Daisuke would ignore the pleas of another creature either way.

Sadly though, Daisuke didn’t exactly have a straight answer. This creature was asking about a sick pet and Daisuke was no vet, although his mind had to wonder what exactly this pet was. This creature did say it could speak after all, and for once Daisuke’s mind didn’t leap to a Digimon right away(he’d seen too many of these strange creatures that claimed they weren’t Digimon at that point).-

Calm down, buddy. He’ll be okay… What kinda pet is he? Perhaps we could take him to a vet. I know one nearby!

[projectprototypal]

He’s a hedgehog like me. Well... He was born, rather than created like I was, so he’s not completely like me... 

Not that that bothered Shadow in the slightest. Shadow didn’t think it made a difference if he was created or born, but it did mean that Sonic had different needs from his own, which was where the problem lay.

I don’t know if a vet will help him. He’s not the four-legged kind of hedgehog. Plus, I don’t know if they’ll do me any service when I nearly blew up the world... 

And then there was the matter of getting Sonic there. Oh, Shadow fretted, but Sonic ignored that and stayed in the house all day.

His poor pet.

[goggleheadmark2-blog]

blow up the world and Daisuke had been suspicious of them from the start but… Why wasn’t he yelling? Why wasn’t he ordering DemiVeemon to Digivolve to take this thing down before it harmed anyone?

This creature was pleading for his help, that was why, pleading with a voice filled with worry and pain. Daisuke couldn’t just ignore that.-

… Yeah. I’m Davis, what’s wrong?

-He brought himself down to the creatures height, one elbow resting on his knee as he examined the creature up close.-

[projectprototypal]

Davis. Hello. 

Shadow fell silent as he gathered up the ability to speak while Daisuke crouched in front of him, remaining completely oblivious to the suspicion that Daisuke held for him earlier. He stared at the ground before he spoke, voice quiet.

My... It’s my pet. He’s sick. He’s really, really sick and I don’t know what’s wrong with him. 

His ears fell and he trembled, just slightly. In front of Sonic, he tried to remain strong, but Sonic wasn’t here.

He lies in bed for days at a time, and it’s hard to get him to move. He often says that eating will make him nauseous... And he never seems happy.

I just...need some kind of cure. Or anything, anything that could point me in the right direction. It’s not healthy for him to skip out on meals and not do anything all day like this. 

He glanced up at the human pleadingly. Oh, he hoped that he knew what to do.

[goggleheadmark2-blog]

-They weren’t ever going to stop showing up, huh?-

You tried to what?

-But Daisuke was one to the this time! This was one was talking about blowing up the world, ha! He knew they were up to no good!-

[projectprototypal]

... To blow up the world. I know, it’s not good. But I... 

Shadow frowned, then shook his head.

Anyway, I need help. Please. You’re a human, right?

[ilikerunningbetter]

Shadow needed to stop staring at him like that, Sonic could feel the guilt tugging at his heart because of it. That guilt wasn’t as bad as the headache he had though. No!

Ugh… Shadow, look, I can get you like a Chao or something to take of just, I’m really not in the mood today, man.

[projectprototypal]

That did not make Shadow feel better. In fact, it made him feel worse. Shadow continued to stare at Sonic, ears dropping. What did he do wrong? He’d just offered to give him a kiss because Sonic didn’t seem to be feeling well. Before, Sonic seemed perfectly happy to be his pet -- did he lie to him?

Shadow swallowed thickly, then started to back out of the room.

I don’t want a Chao, he said softly. I want you. But...you don’t want me... He grew quiet, before turning. I don’t know what I did wrong, but I’m sorry. I’ll leave you alone. I hope you feel better. 

And so, he left.

[ilikerunningbetter]

That was sweet. No really, Shadow was sweet - despite being that hedgehog that wished to blow up the world. But Sonic was tired and as nice as that sounded, he certainly was in no mood for this whole ‘you’re mine’ business.

Shadow, I’m really not in the mood for that pet business today.

[projectprototypal]

Shadow fell silent, staring at Sonic as if struck.

... I thought you said you wanted to be my pet. 

Why would Sonic refer to it as ‘that pet business’?

[ilikerunningbetter]

Of course Shadow wouldn’t wait for his approval, Sonic didn’t even understand why Shadow was still here with him. Sure he claimed he owned him, but Sonic slept most the time, surely he should have left by now to move on to find like a Flicky he could brush and call his own instead.

The smell of eggs frying though did make the blue hedgehog’s stomach grumble and he sat up in bed, the covers rolling off his frail looking body. He really did need to go outside, he needed sunlight at least, even his skin was beginning to look a sickly grey colour.

Thanks… He mumbled as he took the plate from the black hedgehog, taking a bite out of one of the pieces of toast and chewing.

[projectprototypal]

Of course Sonic didn’t understand, and Shadow would explain if the blue hedgehog asked. After all, it wasn’t a secret why he stayed with him; something he owned could easily fall into disrepair, but that didn’t mean he should just throw it away. It was his, and the fact it was his was important.

As of that moment, though, Shadow didn’t reflect on Sonic’s status of disarray, instead wanting to make sure Sonic was happy and healthy. As he took the plate, Shadow sat next to him, watching him as he ate slowly and methodically. He frowned; Sonic was definitely sick, even if the other insisted he was fine. He couldn’t possibly be fine if something such as eating was such a task for him...

[ilikerunningbetter]

projectprototypal replied to your post:Can I kiss you?

… I thought it might help you feel better.

Wah…?

Shadow, why the heck would you think that?

[projectprototypal]

When I received an injury, the Professor would kiss me on the forehead, or wherever I was injured, to make me feel better... And since you’re mine, I thought it would be part of taking care of you...

[projectprototypal]

...

I know I tried to blow up the planet before, but I really need someone’s help.

[ilikerunningbetter]

Dude, you’re not my mother… Sonic wasn’t entirely sure why his voice got watery there, all he knew was that his chest had suddenly clenched with an unidentified sadness. Fuck. He wanted to go back to sleep.

[projectprototypal]

Shadow did not wait for Sonic’s approval. In fact, he’d left the door specifically to grab some food.

It didn’t take him long, either. After maybe five minutes tops, Shadow rapped his knuckles against the door.

I’m going to be coming in. 

One thing about Sonic being owned was the fact that this was technically Shadow’s house now, not Sonic’s, and therefore he didn’t need permission to be in his room, especially for something as important as feeding time. Without giving Sonic time to respond, he opened the door, carrying a plate with toast and eggs.

From what I’ve heard, these are easy to digest... It shouldn’t make you sicker than you already are.

[ilikerunningbetter]

But I’ll be sick if I eat… Nnn… You worry too much, man. I’m not even hungry so I’ll be chill.

[projectprototypal]

... I will bring you food and I expect you to eat at least a little.

[ilikerunningbetter]

I’m not hungry. I’m tired.

[projectprototypal]

You haven’t eaten in nearly a day... Please, eat.

[ilikerunningbetter]

Someone has barely left his room in days.

[projectprototypal]

... Sonic, you need to eat.

[ilikerunningbetter]

Yeah, but… That’s the thing, Shadow. Sonic set down the brush on the counter once more to rub one eye with his hand, turning away from the black hedgehog to flick the kettle on. He needed coffee, more sleep and he would have nearly slept the whole day away, even though that kinda sounded wonderful and Sonic would have preferred that over being awake.

I got the rings to support us, you don’t need to be doin’ any extra work or anythin’. I got enough to keep a roof over our heads ‘n’ food in the cupboards so don’t worry ‘bout buyin’ things, okay? We got everything we need.

[projectprototypal]

Shadow watched Sonic rub his eye and frowned. He didn't imagine the blue hedgehog would be this exhausted; he'd chased after him with a determination that said otherwise. The more he saw of him, the more he worried. How long had it been since anyone had pointed any of this out?

You can give those rings to me if it concerns you that much, he told him softly. Right now, though, he didn't care much about rings. Instead, he approached his pet from behind and gently placed his hands on his shoulders, rubbing his thumbs into the space between them and his back. You're very thin. I can feel it in your shoulders. You don't eat enough.

[ilikerunningbetter]

Highest quality? It looked better than the old brush Honey had given him, that was for sure. And Sonic quickly finished up chewing and swallowing for him to then pick up the brush and examine it carefully. A part of him couldn’t wait for the next time he was laid in Shadow’s lap, snuggled into his warm fluffy chest and dozing in and out of a light sleep whilst Shadow brought that brush through his quills. The other part of him told himself that Shadow brushing him was weird… But… It felt so good.

This looks really nice… He mumbled softly, brushing his fingers through the bristles. You didn’t need to get me things though? I mean, I do really like it but… Where are you gettin’ the rings? ‘N’ don’t we have enough for you to ‘look after’ me ‘round the house? Gee, he was beginning to sound like Honey with that ‘where are you getting the rings’ question.

[projectprototypal]

Shadow watched Sonic from his peripheral vision, the blue hedgehog continuing to chew and swallow on his toast. He really needed him to get to eat more than that, and he hoped that the brush wouldn't offer a distraction from that. The brush was a reward; he wanted Sonic to understand that. In order to get that reward, he needed to be taken care of.

That's not something you need to worry about, he reassured Sonic gently. He continued to shuffle through the bag as Sonic felt up the brush with his fingers. I have enough to get us by. He turned to him, his fingers lingering on the collar that lie within. You should eat more than just toast.