Eternal daydreamer

Instagram:barabasreka

[idleminds]

[comakitten-deactivated20170806]

I’m a sensitive little demon

[pudertukortanc]

:))) amugy

[learn-with-whiteboard]

You in?

[cowboyemojis]

“(…) all she wanted was the smell of the sea, of disappearance.”

— Louise Glück, from March in “Poems 1962-2012″ (via adrasteiax)

[phresious]

[365filmsbyauroranocte]

Nueve cartas a Berta (Basilio Martín Patino, 1966)

[synqra]

[violentwavesofemotion-deactivat]

“We grow. It hurts at first.”

— Sylvia Plath, from The Collected Poems; “Witch Burning,” c. October 1961

[books-n-quotes]

“There’s no need to talk about it, because the truth of what one says lies in what one does.”

— Bernhard Schlink, The Reader (via books-n-quotes)

[sad-indie-techno]

“In order to understand, I destroyed myself.”

— Fernando Pessoa, from The Book of Disquiet (via minuty)

[suspend]

how do you know if you're in love???

I honestly asked my friend this same question just hours ago as I was clueless myself but thinking about it now I think it’s when for the first time after what seemed like a dreadful year (or life), you look forward to waking every morning knowing he (let’s use he as it’s me talking) will be there for you. I think it’s just plain seeing him and being happy that’s he’s around. It’s being happy just by hearing his voice. No matter how bad your day is, one message from him would make your entire day. It’s when he makes you want to write long letters and huge poems. It’s not all about “lust”- it’s more of the intimate relationship you have together. It’s when the simplest of things count. It’s when you start to mature and start to plan something with him for the future. It’s when he makes you want to start fixing your life. It’s when he’s always in your head 3 pm or 3 am. It’s when you can’t stop talking or thinking about him. It’s when you just really always miss him even if he’s right beside you. It’s the “I used to like green eyes but now blue eyes are my favorite”. It’s when all love and cheesy stuff just apply for him. It’s when you begin to see nothing but him and you value him like you value yourself. It’s not the “heart pounding, hands sweating” feeling but more of the “I feel home” feeling. It’s more of like talking to yourself- being yourself with someone without worries. It’s when you begin to really trust him with everything and that includes your happiness. It’s when he’s your happiness. It’s when subconsciously you change for the better. It’s when you once again start opening up after a long time. It’s when you are denying it at most cause you are afraid of how strong you feel and last I think while you’re reading this- there’s someone in your head right now and you’re just contemplating whether you’re in love with him or not but hey the fact that he or she is the person (out of billions of people) in your mind while you read this must say a lot.

[jorrrrr]

What do you do when you lose this kind of love?

[suspend]

I broke up with the person I was thinking of while writing this because that’s what you do when you lose this kind of love- you let go and you move on.

You don’t cling onto the person because “two and a half years has been a long time and it’s a waste to end it here”. You end it because you’ve had enough thinking twice whether the person is still worth staying with or not. You let go because you find yourself looking back, comparing and missing the old times than cherishing the present. You let go because you have to stop defending that person and start facing the truth that things have changed. You let go because you let go of anything that upsets you whether it be work, hobby or a person.

And you let go because you have to stop being selfish. There is someone out there wanting to love the person you’re holding onto and they deserve to feel this genuine love from someone and not a pity love from you.

When you lose this kind of love, you move on. You do it because it’s the best choice for you. You move on because you’ve been hurt enough and it’s time to be happy. You move on because you don’t deserve to doubt the love that someone gives you. You move on and whenever you crumble, remind yourself on why you left in the first place.

And you move forward because you won’t find the right person for you while you’re holding onto the wrong one.

[peachflows]

[naturaekos]

““There was so much sadness in everything, even when things worked.””

— Charles Bukowski (via naturaekos)

[bled]

It’s a miracle we ever met by Hallie Bateman

[pudertukortanc]

orok kedvenc

[megansknees]

note to self entry #05

[amespeciale]

[xvaniex]

“He saw darkness in her beauty and she saw beauty in his darkness.”

— about Hades and Persephone