eldritch apologist

a filthy TSW blog

[tutterypuff]

hey guys sorry it’s me and I’m the way I am, I’ve recently gone into heavy code mode and I’ve been drawing a ton of shit but never posting it so get ready for a dump  also: here’s jayce, in a redraw of possibly the oldest art known to mankind.

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long time no see, fellas

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she’s got a file too, take a look at that anyone who wants to talk to her by all means should lmao

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hey if you guys were looking for a portrait of that bitch that I won’t stop posting about, you’ve got it right here

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wow sorry for whatever the fuck happened last night  have something better than that hot mess 

like Jayce and the incorporeal abomination that just won’t leave her alone

anyway, I’LL GET TO COMMISSIONS SOON I’M SO SORRY

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that big boy right there  that’s the old god that’s bound to Jayce’s sword as he is right now

he kinda shifts and changes depending on what’s been sacrificed, and for the past couple centuries it’s been a lotta goats and horned shit 

but he wants to be a person. he wants people to be sacrificed. and that’s just no good for anybody.

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hey boys and girls did you hear about tsw getting relaunched and me drawing until nearly 4 am?  because I sure did 

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the bitch is back in town

this time with a yandere smile and demonic posession! 

[juczerro]

Tiny sleepy Zaharian. <3

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Bless this sleepy boy

[juczerro]

askshivanulegacy skomentował(a) Twój post: askshivanulegacy skomentował(a) Twoje zdjęcie…

I’ve been thinking about trying that out because my sister has been begging me to do it… but swtor has eaten my life. Is it worth it?????

Definitely worth it! I mean TSW is having a special place in my heart and it’s one of those games I love to come back to (just like swtor). You actually came in the right time for that, because TSW is getting relaunched as Secret World Legends and it’s going to be for free. It’s the same game as The Secret World, but they fixed the mechanics, as they said, fixed graphics and made it all for free (basic game + all the content). So if you want to try it, it won’t cost you anything :D

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Hey hey hey you should play TSW it's a spooky game with spooky fun and it's a high quality time

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I’m putting together a sketchbook for the first time in my life, and I’ve got some traditional doodles that I’m fairly fond of. uwu

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She's just always pissed off now.

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oh my god I haven’t posted this anywhwere lmao Jayce’s blood magic isn’t anything conventional, becuase where would we be if she weren’t a special snowflake

she’s just channeling the rage of that orochi demon sword and her blood’s a perfect conduit for it. 

she needs so much blood to do things lmao

someone be my TSW friend we should RP and plot and have a good time

[deactivatedunfollowmelol]

[aiweirdness]

Cooking with Cthulhu

Here’s what you get when you give incomplete cookbook recipes to a neural network trained on the complete works of H. P. Lovecraft:

Bake at 350 degrees for 30 to 32 minutes. Test corners to see if done, as center will seem like the next horror of Second House.

Whip ½ pint of heavy cream. Add 4 Tbsp. brandy or rum to possibly open things that will never be wholly reported.

Cook over a hot grill, or over glowing remains of tunnel mouth.

With blender on high speed, add ice cubes, one at a time, making certain each cube is the end.

Dice the pulp of the eggplant and put it in a bowl with the vast stark rocks.

NOTE:  As this is a tart rather than a cheesecake, you should be disturbed.

This may be one of the most exceptional souffles you’ll ever serve. The beet color spreads upward from the noisome Great Ones.

Coat apple slices with strange things.

NOTE: If chocolate sauce is not completely smooth, we became the state of the mad and discovered more desperate tracks and merciful sky.

Cook over medium heat until thickened and bubbly. Spoon over bizarre eyes.

Source: Bon Appetit - June 1991 Typed for you by the ancient Alert and Brattleboro and the Walter Sabbath of Inquanok - and the final monoliths of the Essecian Head.

[puffballfhtagn]

this reads exactly like every single one of the lore pages for TSW 

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DID SOMEONE SAY SHIT LIST CHARACTER???????? 

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the dragon wasn’t very nice to her considering she got a handful of people killed and then continued to put people’s lives in danger. 

they honestly hate her. she is the worst. 

[tutterypuff]

((hey guys I started playing TSW and I can’t stop, this is Jayce my main, she’s a reboot of a character I’ve had since I was 11 but somehow I still love her, everyone in the TSW fandom please talk to me I love you all I have a discord we have to play together and RP and everything))

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OK SO BRIEF TIMELINE 

she’s got a super normal middle class upbringing.

once out of high school she moved into Tokyo after spending a year at home. She spent the next year working mostly night jobs and building relationships with some of the seedier citizens of Tokyo. She realized she could use her persuasive skills to make herself into a pretty effective information broker, and began building an information web by befriending small time gangsters, and some members of law enforcement. 

After a while of selling intelligence, the orochi group caught wind of her, and recruited her to sniff out leaks and protect the company’s intellectual property. She was given a high degree of freedom and considered an independent contractor. 

she moved up the ranks of the orochi group for the next seven years, while also using their connections to expand her information web. She was occasionally assigned to go on small missions, but never anything too dangerous or overt. She became a private investigator for the company, and occasionally took jobs for outside sources.

The orochi group has her track down a stolen prototype. It is a weapon forged from a sacrificial knife of a dead god, which could theoretically become a powerful artifact if put in the right hands. Jayce tracks down the people who stole it, but eventually hits a wall when her plans start consistently failing. She realizes someone has been keeping tabs on her, and tries to run.

She is led into a trap, realizing the people she was tracking were never after the weapon, but after her connection to orochi. The dragon offers her a deal to become a double agent for them, which she pretends to accept.

She immediately tells Orochi what happened, hoping they could get her out of her deal, but realizing the kind of liability she was, they stab her with the weapon she intended to return, and leaves her for dead in an alleyway.

Knowing this would happen, the dragon steps in, saves her ass, and offers her a much shittier deal. Jayce, heavily bleeding and with no allies left, has no choice but to accept and becomes a fully fledged member of the dragon.

She ends up running dangerous and tedious jobs for the dragon as punishment, which she constantly bitches about. She also frequently runs jobs involving the orochi group and information gathering. 

she is hoping that she can still get out of her deal and go back to working for the orochi. This is hugely unlikely, but she figures if she finds a way to cripple the dragon from the inside, they’d have to take her back. 

they know this, of course, and assigned someone to keep her in check until they can wear her down enough to stop resisting.

the artifact she was tracking down is now technically hers. The dragon never had any interest in it, and gave it to her as kind of a petty jab at her. But, when she got injured with it, it woke up the dead god that it was bound to, who now desperately wants blood. 

the dead god felt cheated out of a sacrifice after Jayce survived, but after a while he realized the kind of advantage he would have if he could manipulate her, and intends to restart his cult to gain power again, with her as his high priestess. 

Jayce, having none of this bullshit, refuses to fight when it can be avoided, and has never killed anything living with it. 

The old god is also furious at her being such a little bitch and is trying to make her go insane, so she would be easier to sway.