PurpleReina11 @purplereina11 - Tumblr Blog

London Bound

You go to your cousins wedding in Spain, and you catch the eye of the Alexia Putellas, she unintentionally becomes your plus one

Wordcount: 9k

Other Parts

Little warning before you read this, there is mention of cancer, but's not an over riding theme, its not the main purpose for the chapter but I know its a sensitive topic so thought should mention.

You'll probably be able to tell I wasn't feeling this as I was writing it, but I promised it so tried to get it done, so I hope you enjoy for the mess it is ✌🏼

☀️

The house is finally quiet, not silent with three year old twins, true silence doesn't exist, but quiet enough that you can hear the dishwasher humming in the kitchen and the distant sound of the baby monitor gently crackling upstairs.

Dinner had been exactly what dinner with Luca and Enzo always was, one refused to eat anything green because it was "dinosaur food." The other had somehow ended up with pasta in his hair.

You'd cleaned tomato sauce off the walls, Alexia had laughed so hard she'd nearly cried when she'd walked through the front door a couple of hours earlier after an away match, she'd barely put her bag down before announcing, "I do bath and bedtime."

You'd smiled, "You've been travelling all day."

"I know."

"You should rest."

She'd simply kissed your forehead, "I rest tomorrow. Tonight I want my boys."

So you'd let her. You'd stayed downstairs, clearing away the aftermath of dinner while the sounds drifted down from upstairs.

Luca insisting he wanted the blue pyjamas, Enzo insisting they both needed to brush their dinosaur's teeth too.

Alexia trying and failing not to laugh, eventually it was stories, goodnight kisses, one more drink, one more cuddle, one more question, another cuddle, then finally quiet.

You were curled up on the sofa when you heard her footsteps coming back downstairs.

Alexia wandered into the living room looking wonderfully exhausted, hair still damp around the edges where one of the boys had apparently splashed half the bath onto her.

She smiled the second she saw you, without saying a word, she crossed the room, leaned down and kissed you softly before dropping onto the sofa beside you, immediately tucking herself against your side.

You rested your head lightly against hers, "The boys asleep?" you asked.

She nodded, "Asleep."

You let out a slow breath, "Okay..." you said quietly. "So... we need to talk."

Alexia's relaxed posture disappeared almost instantly, she straightened, turning to face you completely, "...Okay." Her eyes searched yours, "You scare me."

You tried to smile, "It isn't us." That seemed to help only a little, she reached for your hand anyway.

You swallowed hard, "I'm going to try and get through this without crying."

"Muppet," she murmured gently, her thumb brushed over your knuckles, "You sick?"

You shook your head, "No."

The first tear escaped before you could stop it, you laughed weakly through it, wiping at your cheek.

"My dad has cancer."

The words landed between you, heavy and real, Alexia's face fell immediately.

Every trace of colour seemed to drain from it, "Oh..." You looked down at your joined hands, "Oh God," you whispered, voice cracking. "It's worse when you say it out loud."

Alexia didn't speak, she simply reached up, brushing the tears from your cheeks with both thumbs.

You took another shaky breath, "He... he has an appointment on Friday."

You struggled over the next words, your voice almost disappeared.

"They're going to go through the prognosis, his survival rate."

Alexia closed her eyes for the briefest second, her forehead resting against yours, "I'm so sorry," she whispered.

The room sat in silence, you sniffed, trying to compose yourself, "I've spoken to Mum a few times today."

She nodded, letting you continue.

"They're... trying to stay positive." You gave a humourless laugh, "I don't even know what that looks like right now."

Alexia squeezed your hand, "You go London," she said quietly. "Be there."

You shook your head immediately, "I can't." She frowned, "I can't, Alexia. You've got a match this weekend. There's the boys. We've got—"

"We sort something."

You looked at her, "I can’t just leave everything."

She interrupted before you could finish, "You can."

"What about the boys?"

"I sort the boys."

"What about training?"

"I sort training."

"What about—"

She shook her head firmly, "No." Her voice wasn't loud, it didn't need to be, "You can no not be there." You opened your mouth to argue again, "No argue, muppet."

There was so much certainty in her voice that it almost undid you.

"I sort the boys," she repeated. "I sort football. I sort everything."

She lifted your chin gently until you were looking at her.

"You need go be daughter."

The tears came harder then, because somehow those four words gave you permission to stop trying to hold everything together.

Alexia wrapped her arms around you immediately, pulling you against her chest. "You spend every day looking after everything," she murmured into your hair. "Now... time for me do so you can go be with your papa"

You cried quietly into her shoulder and she simply held you, like she always did, until the weight felt just a little lighter.

☀️

The garden was unusually quiet, Luca and Enzo had finally worn themselves out after an hour of football in Eli's back garden.

Enzo had insisted he was Mami's team, Luca had quietly decided he was the referee, neither had understood the rules.

Now they were asleep together on a blanket beneath the shade of the olive tree, still in their Barcelona kits, cheeks pink from the afternoon sun.

Alexia watched them, coffee untouched in front of her, she hadn't stopped thinking since you'd boarded the plane three days ago.

Eli noticed, "You've not listened to a word I've said."

Alexia blinked, "...Sorry."

Alba smiled sympathetically, "You've been somewhere else since she left."

Alexia rubbed a hand over her face, "I don't know what we do."

Eli reached across the table, resting her hand over her daughter's, "You don't have to decide today."

She looked back out at the boys, "They need routine." She swallowed, "She need be with her papa." The words caught in her throat, "I cannot ask her to come home because... football." Neither Eli nor Alba interrupted, "And I cannot ask her to leave her dad."

Silence settled over the table, finally Eli spoke, "You've always known football wouldn't always be the most important thing."

Alexia nodded, "I know, but right now" she sighed, "it still is my job."

"It is," Eli agreed, "And no one is saying it shouldn't be."

Alexia leaned back in her chair, "I keep thinking maybe... maybe she should move back."

Alba looked up, "To London?"

Alexia nodded slowly, "Her family is there, her dad." She looked exhausted just saying it, "If this" She struggled to finish the sentence. "If this becomes a long treatment"

Eli nodded gently, "It could."

Alexia's eyes drifted back to the twins sleeping outside, "But..." she whispered another impossible thought, "She no go without boys."

"No," Alba agreed immediately.

"And" Alexia smiled sadly, "I don't want the boys to be without me."

The honesty of it hung in the air, you both could survive distance, you'd done it before years ago, flights between London and Barcelona had been painful, but manageable. You'd counted down days, lived out of suitcases, fallen asleep on video calls.

But back then t had only been the two of you, now there was a family and could a family do long distance? Alexia wasn't sure.

"I think" she admitted quietly, "me and her... we survive." She looked at Eli, "But we have the boys now, we either all go or none of us, and she hate me for making her pick"

Nobody answered immediately, it wasn't the kind of question with an easy answer.

Alba was the first to break the silence, "...Can I say something?" Alexia looked over, "You know your contract is up this year with the plus one year" Alexia nodded, Alba chose her words carefully, "What if you stopped thinking about her moving and started thinking about you moving?"

Alexia frowned, "What do you mean?"

"Maybe you don't accept that plus one and you explore a club in London. You've been saying this past year how the pressure at Barca is getting to much. Maybe you go find a new challenge with less pressure so you can support Y/N and her papa"

The words seemed to freeze the room, Alexia stared at her sister, Alba continued carefully, "I'm not saying you have to. I'm saying..." She glanced towards the garden where her nephews slept, "if y/n needs to be in London for a while and the boys need both of you maybe the question isn't whether your family should separate or stay in Barcelona. It's if football has to stay in Barcelona."

Alexia looked down at her coffee, for nearly fourteen years Barcelona had never been a question.

It had simply been home, her career, her identity, everything she'd built.

The thought of leaving felt almost impossible and yet she looked outside again at the boys she felt she'd saw less of this year than the to previous and smiled anyway.

Then she thought about you, sitting beside your dad in another country with her, trying to be a daughter, a mother, a wife, trying to somehow be all three at once.

Alexia closed her eyes, for the first time since you'd left for London she allowed herself to ask the question she'd been avoiding.

If football had given her everything was it finally time to give something back to the people who had supported her through it all.

☀️

The bedroom was dark, Alexia stirred at first because she thought she'd imagined it a muffled voice, then another but not loud, just enough to pull her from sleep.

She frowned, blinking at the clock on her bedside table.

1:47 a.m.

For a second she wondered if one of the boys had woken up, but no the voices were downstairs, adult voices.

She slipped out of bed and padded quietly onto the landing, the lights downstairs were on.

She descended the staircase slowly, still half asleep as she reached the bottom step, she stopped.

You were standing in the hallway, still in the clothes you'd travelled in.

Your eyes looked tired more tired than she'd ever seen them but when you turned and saw her, your expression softened immediately.

"Ale," you said, surprised, "What are you doing awake?"

Behind you stood your parents, your mum looked exhausted from the travel, your dad somehow looking older than the last time she'd seen him. Cancer had a way of stealing pieces of people before treatment had even really begun.

You smiled gently, "Go back to bed."

Alexia ignored you completely, of course she did. She walked straight over, cupped your face for a brief second before kissing you softly.

"I missed you," she murmured against your lips.

You smiled despite yourself, "I've only been gone four days."

"Too long." Her arm slipped naturally around your waist before she turned to your parents.

Your mum opened her arms before Alexia even had the chance, Alexia smiled warmly, leaning in to kiss her cheek before hugging her properly.

"So good see you."

"And you," your mum replied softly.

Then Alexia turned to your dad, there was the briefest hesitation, not because she didn't know what to do, because she didn't want him to feel treated differently.

She held out her hand first, he took it, but before he could let go, Alexia stepped forward and wrapped him in a hug too. Just long enough to mean something, "It's good to see you, Alexia," he said quietly.

"You too." He smiled, "I hope you don't mind the unannounced visit." He glanced at his wife before looking back at Alexia, "We wanted to come and spend some time with our grandbabies, before treatment starts and we" he trailed off not finishing the sentence not wanting to say out loud that he may not get back here again.

Alexia looked between them both as though the idea of them needing permission was ridiculous, "You never need announce." She shook her head, "Never need invite." Her English stumbled a little with sleep, but the meaning was crystal clear, "You always welcome here."

Your mum reached out, touching Alexia's arm gently, "Thank you, Alexia."

Alexia simply smiled, then she looked down at the two large suitcases sitting just inside the front door without a word, she took one in each hand.

She lifted both as though they weighed nothing, "I put your cases in guest room."

"Ale" you started.

She was already halfway to the stairs, you laughed quietly under your breath.

Your dad watched her disappear upstairs carrying both cases, he looked back at you, "...She's a good one you got there Y/N"

You couldn't help smiling.

☀️

Your parents had long since gone to bed in the guest room, now it was just you and Alexia.

The bedroom was lit only by the small lamp on her bedside table.

You were curled into her side, your head resting on her shoulder, her fingers absentmindedly combing through your hair.

Neither of you had spoken for a while, you were simply existing together, after the last few days, that alone felt comforting.

Alexia kissed the top of your head, "How did appointment go?"

You let out a slow breath, "They've found it in two places" She nodded, encouraging you to continue, "It's treatable, but" Your voice caught, "It won't be an easy short road for him."

Alexia's hand stilled slightly in your hair.

"The consultant was honest." You swallowed, "He said Dad's got a fight ahead of him." You stared at the duvet rather than at her, "They've got a treatment plan, there's surgery, then chemotherapy." You closed your eyes. "They're hopeful."

The word sounded so fragile.

"So are we."

Alexia pressed a kiss into your hair, "So we hold onto hopeful."

You nodded faintly, "Yeah"

She didn't rush to fill the silence, she never did. Instead, she simply wrapped her arm a little tighter around your shoulders.

Eventually you spoke again, "I wanted to talk to you about the boys." Alexia looked down at you, "How we go about this with them?"

She was quiet for a moment thinking, not searching for the perfect answer.

Just the honest one, finally she spoke, "We honest." You looked up, "We no dumb down." Her thumb stroked gently along your arm, "We no hide. We answer any questions."

You considered that, "They're only three."

"I know."

"What if they don't understand?"

"They maybe no understand all now, but they understand love. They understand Grandad. They understand when someone sick."

She brushed a tear from beneath your eye before it had a chance to fall.

"If we pretend nothing happen..."

"They're clever," you murmured, "They'll know"

"They are."

Alexia smiled, "Luca ask one hundred questions."

You laughed quietly, "He'll want to know where cancer lives."

"And Enzo ask if dinosaur eat it."

You couldn't help smiling, "He probably will."

"And then he'll tell Grandad he punch cancer."

A watery laugh escaped you, "I can actually hear him saying that."

Alexia grinned, "'No worry, Grandad. I do big punch.'"

The impression wasn't perfect, but the sentiment was, the laughter faded into something softer. "I just" you whispered, "I don't want them to be frightened."

Alexia reached for your hand, intertwining your fingers, "Then we teach them difference."

"Difference?"

She nodded, "Scared and worried." She touched your chest, "Worried means we love someone."

You looked at her.

"It okay for them worry. It okay for us worry." She leaned down until your foreheads rested together, "But they also need see that family stay together. No matter what."

You felt your throat tighten again, not from fear this time, from relief, because she wasn't trying to fix the unfixable. She wasn't pretending everything would be okay, she was simply reminding you that whatever happened next none of you would face it alone.

☀️

The breakfast dishes were still drying by the sink when you looked over at Alexia. She gave you a small nod to say whenever you were ready.

You took a slow breath, "Luca? Enzo?"

The boys looked up from where they were racing little toy cars across the kitchen floor.

"Can you come and sit with Mama for a minute?"

Enzo immediately drove his car across the floor one last time, "Vroooom..."

"It'll still be there in a minute," you smiled.

Luca quietly picked up both cars and carried them with him anyway.

The four of you settled in the living room, Luca tucked himself into Alexia's side almost automatically, his legs folded underneath him.

Enzo climbed onto the sofa the other side of Alexia, still clutching a dinosaur in one hand.

Alexia between them, one arm resting behind both boys, across from them, your parents sat together on the other sofa.

Your mum reached for your dad's hand, he squeezed it gently.

You sat on the coffee table so you were at eye level with the twins, "Okay, boys..." You smiled softly, "Mama needs you to listen to me, okay?"

Two little heads nodded.

"You know how Mama went to London for a few days?"

"To see Granddad English," Enzo answered proudly, "Mami tell us"

"That's right." You smiled, "Well... Mama went because Granddad English had an appointment."

Luca frowned thoughtfully, "Appointment?"

"With a doctor." You paused, choosing your words carefully, "Granddad English has something called cancer."

The boys looked at one another, then back at you.

"Do you know what cancer is?"

They both shook their heads.

You nodded, "That's okay." You reached over, taking one of each of their little hands, "So..."

You searched for an explanation a three year old could understand.

"Our bodies are made up of millions and millions of tiny little building blocks called cells."

Luca's eyes widened, "Really?"

"Really."

"And normally those building blocks know exactly what they're supposed to do."

You stacked one fist gently on top of the other to demonstrate.

"But sometimes" You moved one hand away, "a few of those building blocks stop listening."

Enzo frowned, "They naughty?"

You smiled sadly, "A little bit. They grow where they're not supposed to and they make someone poorly."

You looked over at your dad for just a second before continuing.

"That's what's happened to Granddad. The cancer is something inside Granddad that can make him very, very sick."

The room was quiet, even Enzo wasn't interrupting.

"The doctors are going to try really hard to help him." You smiled encouragingly, "They're going to do an operation first that means they'll try to take the cancer out."

Luca nodded very seriously.

"And then they're going to give Granddad some special medicine. It's called chemotherapy."

The word sounded impossibly big in such a small conversation.

"It helps try to stop the cancer from coming back but..." You swallowed, "It can make Granddad feel very poorly while he's having it."

Luca looked across at his granddad, "Like tummy bug?"

Your dad smiled gently, "A bit worse than a tummy bug, mate."

Luca's face fell, "Worse?"

Your mum reached over and rubbed your dad's arm, "For a little while."

Enzo looked at your dad with complete sincerity, "Does it hurt?"

Your dad answered honestly, "It can do."

The little boy thought about that, then climbed off the sofa without saying a word, everyone watched him. He walked straight across the room, climbed carefully onto his granddad's lap. Then wrapped both little arms around his neck, "I kiss it better."

Your dad closed his eyes, his arms came around Enzo carefully, "Oh, mate..." His voice cracked, "I think that might help."

Across the sofa, Luca slid quietly off Alexia's lap, he walked over much more slowly. Instead of climbing up, he simply reached for his granddad's hand, holding it with both of his own.

Nobody managed to hold back the tears, your mum covered her mouth. You looked down, blinking rapidly, even Alexia's eyes glistened as she watched the scene unfold.

Your dad let out a shaky laugh, "I'll be ok."

Luca gave his hand one little squeeze, "You can borrow one of my stuffies when you get sad."

A tiny smile tugged at your dad's lips, "I'd like that."

From behind you, Alexia finally spoke softly, "So what do we do when someone in our family poorly?"

Luca answered first, "We help."

Enzo nodded enthusiastically from his granddad's lap, "We cuddle."

"And?" Alexia prompted gently.

The boys looked at one another, then said together, "We love them."

Alexia smiled through the tears gathering in her eyes, "Good Job."

☀️

The locker room had emptied slowly. One by one, the girls had disappeared towards the showers, then the gym, then home, their voices fading until Alexia was left with the occasional slam of a locker and the distant sounds of staff moving around the training ground.

She was still sitting in front of her locker, her boots were off, training kit was half changed, her phone was beside her thigh, screen dark and she was thinking again.

She'd been doing it for weeks now, every time the subject came up, she told herself she wasn't going to think about it yet, her contract still had months left.

There was football to play, titles to win, a season to finish, she was Alexia Putellas, she didn't make decisions about her career because something had become difficult at home.

Except this wasn't simply difficult, this was your dad and Alexia knew exactly what that meant.

She stared down at her hands, she knew what it was like to have a sick father, to have everyone speak carefully around you while pretending they weren't terrified.

She knew what it was like to lose him and perhaps that was the part she couldn't get past, because you had time with yours now.

You had time that Alexia would give almost anything to have back and she couldn't bear the idea of being the reason you didn't get it.

She leaned back against the locker, what if your dad's treatment went well? Then perhaps all of this would be unnecessary. What if it didn't? Her stomach twisted.

What if, years from now, you looked back and realised you'd spent those months flying between London and Barcelona because your wife had football?

What if you missed something? Something that turned out to be the last normal afternoon you ever got with him.

Alexia closed her eyes then opened them again, because she couldn't let herself think like that, but she also couldn't pretend she hadn't.

Her phone lit up.

A message from you.

What do you fancy for dinner tonight?

Alexia stared at it, then another arrived.

Boys have apparently decided they don't need a nap today. Pray for me.

Despite everything, she smiled, she could picture it, Enzo running around the house in his pyjamas, Luca asking for another cuddle.

You standing in the middle of the chaos trying to negotiate with three year olds who had inherited far too much stubbornness from both their mothers.

Suddenly the decision felt even less complicated, it wasn't about Barcelona, not really. Barcelona had been her home for her entire life, this club had given her everything.

She loved it, god, she loved it, but she also loved you and she loved the life you'd built together.

The house, the boys, Sunday mornings, the ridiculous amount of laundry, you leaving mugs everywhere, Enzo refusing to wear matching socks, Luca crawling into their bed after nightmares. You falling asleep against her shoulder while you watched something neither of them was actually watching.

That was her life too and maybe for the first time in her career, Alexia was considering that football might have to fit around her life rather than the other way around.

She picked up her phone, her thumb hovered over your name, she didn't want to tell you yet not because she was hiding it, because she knew you.

You'd immediately tell her not to change anything.

You'd say you could make the distance work.

You'd insist Barcelona was too important.

You'd worry about what she was giving up.

You'd probably cry and then she'd have to explain that she wasn't giving up her career. She was simply considering doing it somewhere else, London had clubs, good ones, clubs that could offer her football, clubs where she could still compete, still play, still be Alexia and give her a new challenge.

If it meant that when your dad had an appointment, you didn't have to calculate flights first, you could be five minutes away instead of five hundred miles maybe that was worth considering.

Her contract was up soon, she was looking at that date and not thinking about what Barcelona would offer her in another contract.

She was thinking about what happened if she said no, Alexia rubbed both hands over her face, "Fuck."

She wasn't even sure if she was sad, that was the strangest part, there was grief in it, obviously, the thought of leaving Barcelona hurt, but beneath it was something else, relief.

The possibility that maybe there was a way to make this work without asking you to sacrifice anything, or asking you to choose between your father and your wife and kids, or making you feel guilty every time you got on a plane.

Her phone buzzed again.

You:You alive?

Alexia smiled, she typed.

Alexia: Yes. Just thinking.

Your reply came almost immediately.

You: Dangerous.

Alexia laughed quietly, shaking her head.

She could practically hear your voice, she typed again.

Alexia: I love you.

There was a pause.

I love you too. Why are you being suspiciously nice?

Alexia's smile grew as she stood, finally beginning to gather her things, she'd speak to her agent, find out what was possible, make sure she wasn't making a decision based entirely on fear, but she would investigate it before telling you her thoughts.

Because maybe the answer wasn't you going back and forth, or you trying to make two homes work, it was all of you choosing one in London.

She stopped by the doorway, she didn't have long left on her contract at all, not long to make the choice.

The biggest decision of her career wasn't going to be about trophies it was going to be about time with your dad and Alexia knew better than most that time was the one thing you could never win back.

☀️

The garden was quiet, not completely but quiet enough that Alexia could hear her own thoughts, which was exactly the problem. She'd been sitting outside for nearly an hour, barefoot, a mug of coffee going cold between both hands.

She'd gone through every possibility so many times that she was beginning to lose track of which version of the future she'd imagined first.

She'd been staring out across the garden when the back door opened, Alexia glanced over as your dad stepped outside.

He didn't ask what she was doing or if she wanted company, he simply walked over and sat beside her.

Alexia looked at him, they'd always had an easy relationship it wasn't forced, not my daughter's wife, therefore I must pretend to like you.

They'd genuinely liked each other from the beginning, he'd teased her about her English, she'd teased him about his football knowledge or lack there of. He'd been one of the first people in your family to make Alexia feel like she belonged.

Now he sat beside her in comfortable silence, Alexia stared down at her mug, eventually, she said, "I'm thinking of not renewing with Barça."

Your dad didn't react immediately, he simply looked ahead, "Are you?"

Alexia nodded, "I think." She let out a breath, "I don't know." She rubbed her thumb over the handle of her mug, "I love Barcelona."

"I know."

"Like..." She struggled for the words. "I don't know how explain. It is my home. My whole life."

Your dad nodded, "But..."

Alexia swallowed, "But I think maybe I need something different." He turned his head towards her, Alexia stared out across the garden, "The pressure is too much sometimes."

She gave a small, humourless laugh.

"Everyone think because I'm Alexia, I can do everything." She gestured vaguely, "Win game. Win title. Be captain. Be good example. Always perform. Always be available."

She shook her head.

"And I do it. I want do it. I love football." Her expression softened, "But sometimes..." She paused, "I come home and I'm tired and I have boys. I have wife." Alexia smiled faintly.

Your dad smiled at that.

"And I realise I miss things." Her voice became quieter, "Not big things always, maybe. Small things." She looked down, "Sometimes I am so tired that when I am home, I'm there but..." She struggled, "Not really there."

Your dad nodded slowly.

Alexia took another breath, "And now this."

She didn't need to explain what this was, his diagnosis, the possibility that things might get harder before they got better.

Alexia's fingers tightened around the mug, "I keep thinking about Y/N."

"She should be here." Your dad looked at her.

Alexia nodded, "I know, but she go London because she needs be with you." She looked down, "And I don't want her to have to choose."

Your dad's expression changed slightly.

Alexia continued, "She shouldn't have to think, 'If I go see Dad, what about Alexia? What about boys? What about Barcelona?'" She shook her head, "That's not fair and if treatment is difficult..." She swallowed, "I don't want her to miss time with you because I have match."

Your dad was silent for a moment, then he said quietly, "Alexia, you know I don't want you giving up your career at Barca because of me."

He looked at her, he sighed softly.

"Why?"

Alexia looked towards the house, "Because maybe..." She paused, "Maybe it isn't giving up. Maybe I go somewhere else."

"Somewhere else?"

"A different league." Alexia's eyes drifted back to the garden, "Different football. Different style. Different pressure." She shrugged, "Maybe I don't have to be... everything."

There was something vulnerable in that sentence, your dad understood it, Barcelona wasn't just a club to her. It was an enormous weight she'd carried for years because she loved it enough to carry it, but perhaps she was tired.

"I could go England," she said, "London."

He didn't say anything, Alexia continued, almost as though saying it aloud made the possibility more real.

"There are clubs there Good clubs. I could still play. "Still compete. Still have football." She glanced towards him, "But be close."

Your dad's face softened, "Close to us?"

Alexia nodded, "To you and family" She looked down at her hands, "If you have treatment, she can be here. She can help you. She can be daughter and she can still be wife and mama."

Your dad looked away for a moment, Alexia could see emotion settle across his face, "And the boys?" he asked.

"They be fine, they happy causing chaos anywhere" Alexia laughed quietly.

They sat quietly again, then your dad said, "Would you be happy?"

Alexia didn't answer straight away, that was the question, not whether it made sense or if it was practical, "I think..." She swallowed, "I could be, I happy wherever my wife and boys are, football is just football"

Your dad nodded, "Then maybe you should think about it."

Alexia smiled, "I am."

He looked at her for a moment, then added, "But don't make the decision because you feel guilty."

"I don't."

"Don't leave Barcelona because you think that's what Y/N would want before speaking to her."

"If you want London, go to London, but if you want Barcelona, stay. You don't have to prove you love Y/N by changing your whole career."

Alexia's eyes stung, "I know."

"And you don't have to prove you love Barcelona by sacrificing your family." That one nearly broke her.

Alexia looked down, blinking quickly.

Your dad squeezed her knee, "You've given that club enough."

Alexia laughed weakly, "Don't say that. They hear you."

Your dad laughed and suddenly the weight lifted slightly, Alexia leaned back in the chair. "Maybe I want to play somewhere where people don't expect me to save everything."

Alexia looked towards the house again.

"Maybe I want to come home and just be Mami and wife."

Your dad leaned back beside her, "Sounds like you've got a lot to think about."

Alexia nodded, she did, but for the first time, the thought of leaving Barcelona didn't feel like losing something.

It felt like choosing something and maybe that was the difference.

☀️

By the time you finally got the boys upstairs, dinner was already on the table, Alexia had insisted on making it.

You'd tried to argue that she'd been training all day and should sit down, but she'd pointed towards the stairs and said, very firmly, "You do bedtime. I do dinner."

So you'd left her to it which, judging by the smell drifting upstairs, had been the correct decision.

You'd managed to get Luca into his pyjamas without incident, Enzo had somehow turned putting on trousers into a hostage negotiation. Then there had been two stories, then one more, then water, then a second trip to the bathroom. Then Enzo had decided he couldn't possibly sleep without the dinosaur he'd left downstairs.

By the time you finally crept back downstairs, you were exhausted, you stopped in the doorway to the dining room.

Alexia had set the table properly, not just thrown food onto plates, properly, candles lit, the nice glasses out, food in the middle of the table.

You stared at her, "What's all this?"

Alexia looked up from where she was pouring wine, "Why?"

"You've made dinner like we're on a date."

She smiled, "Maybe we are."

You narrowed your eyes, "You're suspicious lately"

"Muppet." She held out her hand, you took it, letting her pull you into the chair beside her, she kissed your temple before sitting down herself.

For a few minutes, you just ate, you hadn't realised quite how hungry you were until the first few bites.

Alexia watched you for a second.

Until Alexia put her fork down, “I need tell you something."

You pointed your fork at her, “You're acting guilty."

Alexia rolled her eyes, "I'm not guilty."

"You're doing the face."

"What face?"

"The face you do when you're about to say something you think I'm not going to like."

Alexia sighed, “Maybe I am married to detective."

"Spill."

She looked down at the table, then back at you, "I thinking maybe I no renew with Barça."

You stared at her, for a second, you genuinely didn't understand what she'd said, "What?"

Alexia reached for your hand, you pulled it away not dramatically, just enough, her eyebrows knitted together, "I thinking about not renewing."

You stared at her, “For how long?"

"Some time."

"Ale."

"I know." She reached across the table, taking your hand, "I've been thinking a lot."

You looked down at your joined hands, “About leaving?" She nodded, "Why?"

Alexia breathed out slowly, “Because..." She hesitated as you waited, "The pressure."

Your expression softened, she didn't talk about this often, not properly.

"I love Barcelona," she said quickly. "You know I love. It is my home. My club."

"I know."

"But sometimes..." She looked down, "I feel like everything is on me." You stayed quiet, "Every game. Every bad result. Every important match. Everyone looks at me." She shrugged, "Captain. Alexia. Leader." Her fingers tightened around yours, "And I like being that person. I do. But sometimes I go home and I have nothing left."

Your chest tightened, “Ale..."

She had told you pieces of this before, "And I think maybe I need different."

"Different how?"

"Different league, club, different pressure and challenge" She looked at you, "Maybe London."

Your stomach dropped, you stared at her, "No."

Alexia blinked, "No?"

"No."

"Muppet—"

"No."

You pushed your chair back slightly, "Absolutely not."

She looked genuinely surprised, "Why?"

"Because you don't get to do that."

"Do what?"

"Give up Barcelona because my dad has cancer."

Alexia's face changed, "I'm not giving up because—"

"You literally just said London."

"Because you could be near your dad."

"Exactly." She went quiet, you shook your head, suddenly emotional, "No, Alexia." You rubbed your hands over your face, "Do you know what Barcelona means to you?"

"Yes."

"No, I don't think you do right now." Her eyebrows pulled together, "You've spent your entire life there."

"I know."

"Your whole career."

"I know."

"Your childhood."

"Yes."

"Your friends."

"Yes."

"Your entire identity as a footballer."

Alexia's jaw tightened slightly, uou could see she'd started getting defensive, but you weren't angry with her. That was the worst part, you were terrified she actually meant it.

"You can't just leave because my dad's sick."

"I'm not just leaving."

"You're considering it because of me."

She didn't answer, that silence was enough, your eyes immediately burned.

"Fuck."

You looked away, Alexia's expression softened, "Baby..."

"No." You wiped underneath your eye, "No, because this isn't fair."

"To who?"

"To you."

She frowned, "I'm okay."

"You're not." You looked at her, "You're sitting here telling me you're thinking about walking away from the club you've spent your entire life playing for because you think I need you to."

"I no say that."

"You don't have to." You gestured helplessly between you, "It's right there."

Alexia was quiet.

You swallowed, "My dad being sick doesn't mean you have to uproot your entire career."

"But you need be in London."

You took a breath, "Look..." You reached across the table and took her hand this time, "I want to be in London."

Alexia's fingers curled around yours.

"Of course I want to be near my dad, he needs me"

Alexia's expression softened.

"I don't want to become the reason you look back in five years and hate the decision you made."

"I wouldn't."

"You don't know that."

"I know me."

"So do I." That made her quiet, you swallowed around the lump in your throat, "I know how much you love that place, what it means you and your family.. how it makes you feel close to your papa"

You looked down at your hands.

"And I know what it would mean for you to leave that behind." Alexia's thumb moved slowly over yours, "I moved here because I loved you and I'd do it every time, I don't regret it, i love the life we've built here"

"I know."

"So don't turn around and act like now you have to give me something back."

Her face crumpled slightly at that and you immediately softened.

"That's not how marriage works."

"I know."

"You don't owe me London because I moved to Barcelona."

"I know."

"You don't owe me a new club because my dad is sick."

"I know."

"I'd follow you to the ends of the earth so you could play for whatever club you wanted Alexia"

Alexia stared at you.

You could see her eyes beginning to shine, "I love you," you whispered.

"I love you too."

"And I want you happy."

She swallowed, Alexia looked down, "But I want you happy too."

You squeezed her hand, "I am."

"You're not."

You frowned, "Excuse me?"

She gave you a tiny smile, "You've been crying for three days."

"That's because my dad has cancer."

"I know."

"And because my wife is apparently trying to retire from Barcelona by stealth."

"I no retire."

"Feels like it."

Alexia actually laughed, you couldn't help smiling, then she became serious again, "I don't want you to have to choose between me and your dad."

You felt the emotion come rushing back you shook your head, "Ale..."

"Listen." She squeezed your hand, "I have thought about this."

"I know."

"I've been thinking for weeks."

That surprised you, "Weeks?"

She nodded, "I talk to Alba."

"Not your mami?"

"Yes. Mami to, and your dad."

You stared, "You talked to my dad?"

Alexia smiled faintly, "Yes"

"Jesus Christ."

"He is good advice."

"He probably told you to stop being an idiot."

Alexia's smile widened, "Something like that."

You shook your head, but the smile disappeared quickly, "So..." You looked at her, "Why?"

Alexia's expression changed, she looked vulnerable, "Because I am tired." You stilled, she looked down, "Not tired of football."

"I know."

"Not tired of Barça." She swallowed, "But tired of feeling like I have to be everything." Her fingers tightened around yours, "Every game, I need be Alexia." She laughed quietly, "Captain. Leader. Best. Strong."

She shook her head.

"Sometimes I want to come home and be stupid Mami."

You smiled despite yourself, "You're already very good at that."

She gave you a look, "Don't ruin moment."

"Sorry."

She continued, "I want to have more time off pitch for you and for boys." She looked at you, "And maybe..." She hesitated, "Maybe your dad being sick make me realise how much time I lose." Your heart squeezed, "Time I don't get back."

You were quiet.

"Maybe I want different." She shrugged, "Maybe I want new challenge, why not London, make sense, but..." She raised your hand to her mouth and kissed it, "I no want you think I do it because I think have to."

You looked at her for a long moment, "Then promise me."

"Promise what?"

"If you do leave Barcelona..." You paused, "...it's because you want to." Alexia nodded, "Not because of my dad or because you think you owe me."

"Okay."

You stared at her, "Say it."

Alexia rolled her eyes, "Muppet."

"Ale."

She sighed, "I promise."

"Properly."

She gave you a look, "Seriously?"

"Yes."

Alexia leaned across the table, "I promise I no leave Barça because your dad is sick." You waited, "I no leave because I owe you. I only leave if I decide I want."

You finally nodded, "Okay." Alexia looked relieved, then you added, "And if you do decide you want to leave..." She waited, "...you explore all options, not just London."

Her eyebrows lifted, "I like London."

"You hate rain."

"I buy umbrella."

"You hate English football."

"I no hate."

"You called it 'too much running' last month."

"It is." You laughed, Alexia smiled across the table, then her expression softened again, "Would you want it?"

You knew what she meant, you looked down, "I want to be near my dad." She nodded "And I want you to be playing happily." Alexia's face softened, "So..." You sighed, "If you genuinely wanted London" You shrugged, "I'd support it."

Alexia leaned back, for a moment, neither of you said anything, then you whispered,

"But I don't want to be the sole reason you go."

She reached across the table again taking your hand, she kissed your fingers, "You're my reason for thinking about what comes next."

Your eyes filled again as you groaned, "Oh, fuck off."

Alexia laughed, "Why?"

"Because that was disgustingly romantic."

"I am romantic."

"You are not."

"I am."

"You once gave me a protein bar for Valentine's Day."

"It was good protein bar." You burst out laughing, Alexia smiled triumphantly, "See?"

"You're an idiot."

"Your idiot."

You squeezed her hand, "Unfortunately."

She leaned across the table and kissed you soft and slow, when she pulled back, her forehead rested against yours, "I don't know what I do yet, but..." She kissed you again, "We figure out." You closed your eyes, "Together so we happy family." ☀️

The next few weeks became slightly ridiculous, at first, Alexia didn't say much.

She'd come home from training, drop her keys into the bowl by the door and casually mention something like, "Agent call today."

You'd look up, "About?"

"Club."

"Which club?"

She'd shrug, "One in France." And that would be that, until the following day, "Another club called."

You'd slowly lower your coffee, "Another?"

"Yes."

"How many clubs are there interested?"

Alexia would grin, "Apparently many."

Then the numbers started coming and that was when you realised just how serious the situation was.

You'd be sitting on the sofa with the boys playing at your feet and Alexia would casually tell you an offer.

You'd blink, "Sorry, what?" She'd repeat it, you'd stare at her, "That's... a lot of money."

Alexia would shrug, "Yes."

"Like, a lot of money."

"I know."

"And they actually offered that?"

"Yes." You'd look at her suspiciously, "Are you sure your agent isn't just trying to make you feel important?"

She'd roll her eyes, "Muppet."

Another offer came from elsewhere, then another, different countries, leagues, salaries, different promises about what the club wanted her to do and every time, Alexia listened as promised.

She considered, she talked it through with you, she'd look at the numbers, the sporting project, the league, the expectations, then she'd eventually put her phone down. "But..." You'd know what was coming, "London City."

You started noticing it. No matter how impressive the other offers were, she kept circling back to London City.

One evening, after the boys had gone to bed, you finally asked, "Why London city?"

Alexia looked up from her phone, "What?"

"You keep doing it."

"Doing what?"

"Every time your agent gives you another option, you go back to London City."

She smiled faintly, "I like them."

"You like other clubs too."

"Yes."

"And some of them are offering you ridiculous amounts of money."

"I know."

"So why London City?"

Alexia leaned back into the sofa, thinking, then she shrugged, "Many reasons."

"Such as?"

She held up one finger, "This season, they no Champions League."

You nodded, "So?"

She looked at you as though it was obvious, "So I no have to play Barça."

You went quiet. Ah, that.

Alexia's expression softened, "I know if I leave playing against them would be strange."

"Very strange."

"And first season..." She shook her head, "I don't think I want that."

You reached for her hand.

She smiled sadly, "I spent my whole life with some of those girls."

She squeezed your fingers, you nodded that made sense.

Then she held up another finger, "Spanish girls."

You smiled, "There are Spanish players there?"

"Yes."

"That matters?"

"Very."

She leaned her head against your shoulder, "I know how difficult it would be. New country. New league. New team. New language." She looked at you, "And I am already bad enough with English."

You laughed, "Your English is fine."

"No."

"It's fine."

"Sometimes I say things wrong."

"That's part of the charm."

She smiled, "But having girls who can translate for me..." She shrugged, "Would help."

You nodded, "You've really thought about this," you murmured.

Alexia smiled, "Yes."

You looked down at your intertwined hands, "And the money?"

She shrugged, "Money is good."

You laughed, "That's the understatement of the century."

"I know."

"But?"

"But I no need most money, we have money" She looked at you, "I need happy." That caught you off guard, she continued, "I want football. I want challenge. I want family happy" She squeezed your hand, "And I want you near your dad."

Your eyes stung slightly, "You know you don't have to say that every time."

"I know, but I want you to know I think of you to in my decision, it not all bout me"

You leaned your head against hers, "And London City gives you all of that?"

Alexia thought for a moment, "Think so."

You nodded slowly, "How much did they offer?"

Alexia told you, you nearly choked, she immediately started laughing.

"Oh my God."

"You okay?"

"That's obscene."

"I know." Alexia kissed your temple, then she looked towards the stairs, "Come on."

"What?"

"We go bed."

"You just got offered a life changing amount of money and your response is bedtime?"

She shrugged, "Boys wake at seven."

You laughed, "Fair."

Alexia stood, pulling you up with her, you followed her upstairs, you realised something, Alexia wasn't choosing London City because it was the only place that would take her. She was choosing it because, slowly, it was beginning to look like the place where both parts of her life could fit.

☀️

Two months later, London had somehow become home.

It still felt strange sometimes.

There were boxes that hadn't quite made it out of storage yet, a few pieces of furniture you'd bought in a panic because you'd realised you actually needed somewhere to put things, and the boys were still discovering new hiding places in the penthouse that you were fairly certain they had no business being in, but it was home.

Your dad's treatment had been brutal. There had been days where he'd been exhausted, days where you'd sat beside him and hated how little you could do to make any of it easier, but he was doing well. Better than you'd dared hope when you'd first heard the word cancer.

And now, sitting in the passenger seat beside you, was Alexia was staring out of the window as London rolled past.

"You nervous?" you asked.

She immediately looked at you, "No."

You smiled, "Liar."

"I'm no nervous."

"You're picking at your sleeve."

She looked down, her fingers immediately stopped, "I do this?"

"Whenever you're nervous."

"I'm not nervous."

"Okay." You let the silence sit for approximately three seconds, "You are nervous."

Alexia sighed, "Maybe little."

You reached across and squeezed her hand, "Second day."

"I know."

"Not your first day."

"Yesterday I go home and sleep on you for two hours."

You laughed, "You were exhausted."

"So much information." She looked genuinely overwhelmed just remembering it, "I don't know anyone, hard to remember all names"

"You know Jana and Mapi and now you know everyone else a little more than you did the day before."

She gave you a look and you laughed.

"You're doing fine."

Alexia looked at you for a moment, then her expression softened, "You think?"

"I know."

She leaned across and kissed your cheek, "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Everything."

You smiled, "Just play good football, Putellas."

She grinned, "Yes, boss."

When you pulled into London City's training ground, Alexia immediately sat a little straighter. You could practically see the switch happen, your sleepy, introverted wife who'd spent most of yesterday absorbing information like a sponge suddenly became footballer Alexia again.

She climbed out of the car and waited for you to get the boys, Luca immediately reached for your hand, Enzo was already pointing at the buildings.

"Mami football!"

"Yes, baby."

Alexia smiled, "Come on."

The coach had specifically invited you and the boys in, apparently, it was something he liked doing with new players, not just introducing teammates. Introducing families, building something beyond football.

You'd thought it was lovely, Alexia had been slightly more apprehensive, now you understood why. The second you walked through the entrance, Alexia started getting stopped.

"Hola."

"Morning."

"Hey, Alexia."

"How are you?"

She smiled, returning every greeting, then she spotted someone further down the corridor, "Come." She reached back for your hand, "I introduce you."

You followed with Luca holding your other hand and Enzo being carried by Alexia.

The first few introductions went smoothly, then someone looked at you, then looked at Alexia, then back at you, "You're English?"

You smiled, "Last time I checked."

They laughed, "I just assumed you would be Spanish!"

"No."

Alexia immediately jumped in, "She speak Catalan better than me sometimes."

The player laughed, "And you two have been together how long?"

Alexia glanced at you, "Nearly 6 years."

You smiled, "Married, 4"

That seemed to surprise them even more, "You're married?"

Alexia held up her left hand, "Very."

You laughed.

The next person she introduced you to had almost exactly the same reaction, "Wait, you're actually English?"

You raised an eyebrow, "Is there something about me that screams Barcelona?"

"You just..." They gestured vaguely, "I don't know." You laughed, "Apparently I fooled everyone."

Alexia shook her head fondly, "She very English."

"Excuse me?"

"Very."

"How?"

"You complain about weather."

"That's not uniquely English."

"You want hot when cold, and cold when hot, never happy" Alexia smiled smugly knowing she was right

The conversation was interrupted by a familiar voice, "Are those the twins?"

You turned, Jana was walking towards you, Luca immediately recognised her, "Jana!"

Her face lit up, "Oh my God." She crouched immediately, Luca let go of your hand and hurried over.

Jana opened her arms and he threw himself into her, "Hola, peque."

He smiled shyly against her shoulder, then Enzo spotted who was coming up behind her, "MAPIIII!"

Mapi barely had time to crouch before Enzo launched himself at her, she caught him with a laugh, "Madre mía." Mapi kissed Enzo's cheek repeatedly until he started giggling, "You remember me, eh?"

"Traidora!"

Mapi froze, then looked at you, you immediately started laughing, "He's been waiting to call you that. If it makes you feel better he called it to Alexia yesterday on her first day."

Mapi put a hand dramatically over her heart, "My little culer."

Luca was still tucked quietly against Jana, Jana looked down at him, "He still shy."

"Always." You smiled, "He's still like that with some family."

Mapi looked between the boys, "Enzo still chaos?"

You didn't even need to answer, Enzo had already wriggled out of Mapi's arms and was attempting to investigate a nearby door.

"Yes."

Mapi laughed.

"Nothing changed."

Alexia stood beside you, watching them, you slipped your hand into hers. She squeezed it, you noticed the tension leave her shoulders.

A teammate walked past and called something to Alexia, she answered in Spanish before catching herself and switching to English.

You smiled, "You're settling in."

She looked at you, "Maybe."

"Definitely."

Then the coach appeared from further down the corridor, "Good, you're all here." He smiled at you, "Welcome to London City."

You smiled back, "Thank you for having us."

He looked towards the boys, "And these must be Luca and Enzo."

Both boys stared at him, Enzo pointed at his own shirt, "Mami's"

The coach laughed, "I can see that."

Alexia looked immensely proud, "Both football mad."

You shook your head, "Don't encourage them."

Mapi called from behind you, "Too late."

Everyone laughed and as you watched Alexia talking to her new coach, one hand still holding yours while Luca leaned against your leg and Enzo attempted to climb onto Mapi again, you realised something.

This wasn't Barcelona, it wasn't supposed to be, it was something new, something you'd built together and for the first time since Alexia had told you she might leave Barcelona, you looked around and thought maybe this really could be home. Even if only for a little while.

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