brainz*

no consistent schedules, we post shit like zombies

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

Plants vs. Zombies Dirty Confessions - Epilogue

[goonsoftheweb]

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

wait a second... now i see what's happening. the kinkiest members of the pvz community have only stopped playing pvz, which sort of makes sense because ea is terrible. they're still as kinky as ever. unfortunately, there is nothing i can do about that.

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

Wait a second.

I’m looking through the PvZ tag and wh

Where did all the porn go? I mean, I’m not upset, maybe that’s why the Kinkiest-Ass Fuck is taking so long but I mean, I scrolled back to at least February in that tag and saw absolutely no explicitly kinky content. Maybe a little unexplicitly kinky content. Are we free? Are we free at last? Do I just unfortunately have some setting turned off that protects my eyes here?

[april]

if you dont find any type of undead at least slightly attractive what are you even doing with your life really

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

“Listen, buddy.”

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

not a dirty confession but valenbrainz zombie is panromantic and loves hot date

Yeah, that sounds pretty valid.

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

A couple minor updates have been made to Mod Dandelion’s character model. His hair is now HD, and some of the lines where I erased the seeds are less shaky. Thank you, Magic Wand tool. Placement of the afro might also be slightly different, but not significantly so. I don’t know if anyone would notice if I didn’t point it out! Ah well.

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

Since this week is Dandelion Week, and the Kinkiest Ass Fuck is taking a while...

Send your confessions. You’ll only make the Kinkiest-Ass Fuck more powerful, but I don’t care anymore. It’s boring down here in my Danger Bunker. I need something to do, and I think that my kinkshame powers are increased or something for one week.

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

Mod Dandelion’s guaranteed meat soup recipe!

I can’t eat tomatoes because I’m a plant, but I sure can eat meat soup!

MEAT SOUP RECIPE:

Get a big ol’ slab of meat. Doesn’t matter what kind!

Liquify.

????????

Meat Soup

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

We have a lot of meat soup down here. I’m surprised how long this is taking.

[griffinwhereheshouldntbe]

me: nice me 2 me: no its not, theres almost 70 messages in ur inbox cuz u never do anything anymore me: ok but thats the sex number

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

Just a note in advance, do NOT masturbate to the kinkiest-ass fuck. I don’t care if it has all your fetishes and then some, that will only make it stronger. You kinky-ass fuck.

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

Sorry about the lack of updates. The kinkiest-ass fuck is taking longer to prepare than I thought. Fortunately, this gives me more time to prepare as well. I’m going to be in the shelter with Penelopea, drinking meat soup. It will be a difficult fight, but damn it, we will survive this, and show this beast hell unlike any other.

[pvz-dirty-confessions]

how will you know what/who the kinkiest ass fuck is?

The Kinkiest-Ass Fuck is not a person. It is a being built from the collective energy of everyone else’s kinks. If you see a being that looks like nearly every conceivable fetish thrown together in a blender... that’s probably what it is. It takes a new form every time, so you can’t understand it from previous incarnations.I believe it attempts to be the most sexually attractive being alive by combining everyone’s kinks. With some of the horrifying things I have seen, I can only fear how it will look.I’m gonna sign off for tonight. Unless the Kinkiest-Ass Fuck strikes in my sleep, hopefully we will be prepared by the time of its arrival.