Train like a BEAST look like a BEAUTY @queenkobiii - Tumblr Blog

90sfashiongal

unclefather

me: *at comedy open mic night*

me: *heavy breathing and staring into the audience while being blinded by stage lights*

me: *mic crackles* Anyone…. Anyone here…. Anyone here do anal

psychcomedy

If you’re interested in more psychology humor, follow @psychcomedy

prokopetz

Trainability in cats is a funny thing.

My cats understand and will obey a number of verbal commands, one of which is “go away”. I don’t use it often, but if they’re bugging me and I’m trying to work or doing something that could be dangerous for cats, I can tell them to go away, and off they go - they’ll only keep pestering me if there’s a serious problem they need me to look at.

That said, their idea of a serious problem that requires my attention is somewhat eccentric. Previous instances have included:

There was an unfamiliar car parked across the street

Their water bowl was four inches to the left of its usual position

One of them had puked on the stairs and they didn’t want to walk past it

It was raining

One of them saw a weird bug

hollowedskin

These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.

blenderweaselhasopinions

Dogs really aren’t much better. I teach all my dogs the command “show me”. How it works is if the dog needs something but I’m having trouble understanding what exactly they’re trying to tell me, I say “show me” and they lead me to whatever the problem is. Usually they lead me to a real problem (like a toy that got stuck under the couch, their water bowl is empty, etc). But sometimes they want me to fix things like this-

They pulled the covers off my bed and now they want me to put the covers back

They put their ball on top of the ottoman but the ottoman won’t throw it for them

The cat is sleeping and won’t chase them

A flower fell off the potted plant

The cat is sitting in a box and they don’t like it

One of them lost their bandana

The cat won’t take the toy they’re trying to give her

The cat DID take the toy they gave her and now they want it back

alicaneiceindigo

Time for Childhood for you 90s/Early 2000s kids

lexxicona

Every damn thing on here except for the apple product

xennariel

I would also like to add

thatgaybitxh-deactivated2025062

I missed most of this stuff but i still made marker swords 👍

theazureesper-deactivated201807

This post is Fucking me up, good.

I remember all of this, except for the two computer games. Hell, I still like cosmic brownies. That shit is good.

davidmann95

That was…visceral. In how it so suddenly brought back so much.

allaboutbutera-deactivated20230

livingabovetherest-deactivated2

This made me like her lots

swimmingferret

If someone underage initiates a sexual conversation with you- which isn’t just them asking for advice or sex ed -it is up to you, the adult, to shut the conversation down. You do not reciprocate and start speaking sexually/flirting back at them, even if the minor claims they don’t mind.

You shut down the conversation and leave because you’re the fucking adult. Stop being sexual to children even if they start it and say they aren’t bothered- they’re still underage and it is your responsibility as the adult to stop it.

how-to-kill-a-mocking-bird

fuckyeahstarwars

Rest In Peace, Princess.

phainonkhaslana

carriefishrr

Your highness, the transmission we received. What is it they sent us? Hope.

just-a-skinny-boy

jenwunhui

Harry Potter as a teen comedy…

thriftedcardigan

maybe the best example of editing can portray a mood, tbh like this is really funny but it’s also just artistically amazing

polaroidxirwin-deactivated20180

i literally always reblog this because its soooo good

lisafer

ALWAYS REBLOG.

poetry-of-the-foot

A lovely photo taken back in 2014 of my performance of the Dying Swan #dancer #ballet #dyingswan #performance #2014

thebootydiaries

BOI

actualfarmerclintbarton-deactiv

wittyusernamed

My buddy read an article about octopus intelligence. It was feeding time, and the handler dumped some shrimp into an octopus’ tank. Then he went into another room and sat at his desk.

A while later, a shrimp was tossed onto his desk.

The octopus, upon finding one bad shrimp in the lot, had grabbed it, escaped its tank, crossed the hall, and threw the expired shrimp at its caretaker. Not only does this showcase their problem-solving capabilities, but also that it could have escaped at any time. It just broke out this time to chuck an off shrimp in indignation at its handler. That’s not just intelligence, that’s a human-like reaction. Kinda make you wonder exactly how smart these guys can be…

rocketxsurgeon

OH MY GOD

teaandtime

I went to the aquarium once and we had a tour and we walked past the octopus tank and it was duct taped shut so I asked why and the guy was like. “Well, we had a problem before because these fish were disappearing randomly at night and we had no idea why. Turns out the octopus had memorised the night guards rounds and would creep out of its tank, crawl across the floor to the fish tank, have a little snack and be back in its own tank with the lid shut before the guard came back.” they are super smart

manynamedshe

I love octopuses so, so much.

thecheshirecass-deactivated2018

@_@

I am both delighted and FUCKING TERRIFIED.

vin-goghsts

Once I went to the aquarium where they had a baby pacific red octopus in a tank. I had gone there to work on a few real life sketches, obviously I wanted to do one of an octopus. So I kinda just kneeled in front of the tank, and started sketching. The octopus didn’t mind, he sat happily. Then, 5 minutes later, he started moving to the front of the tank, where I was. This tiny octopus faces me directly and starts posing. I don’t know how other to explain it but he started curlung his tentacles in this really graceful way then wouldn’t move for a few minutes. Then again, a new pose. That tiny cute motherfucker knew I was drawing him.