what is love?

Quinn Fabray 28. New York City. Number 4. I'm a student in the Masters program at NYU TISCH School of the Arts and I teach dance part time at a studio in Manhattan. As far as my personal life and the number system, there's not much I'm willing to say on the topic.

[quinninthecity]

stjamesactually‌:

Such an awful thing to wake up to. It’s devastating to realize that we live in a time where we’re going to lose many of the greats.

I’m glad I’m not the only one who was affected by this news. She was great. But it’s different when they shaped your taste in music. 

[quinninthecity]

wildeactually‌:

Classy girl. I like your taste. While I was thinking something a little more traditional, like an awful comedy or something, I might have been tempted by your suggestions.

Can’t remember the last time I watched something with actual quality.

I’m almost offended you’d think anything less of me. 

That’s perfectly fair. It’s hard to find anything with quality these days.

[smytheactually]

SHIP TO WRECK | SEQUAINE

[quinninthecity]

smytheactually‌:

WHO: Sebastian Smythe, Blaine Anderson, and Quinn Fabray. WHAT: Sebastian wakes up in the hospital and Blaine and Quinn are there to greet him.  WHEN: Monday, August 6th, 4:00 AM. WARNINGS: None.

BLAINE

Blaine hated hospitals.

Hated the smell. Hated the echoes of footsteps as doctors and nurses shuffled between rooms. Hated the way they would lower down their voices when they had to say ‘there’s nothing more we can do’ to those who were waiting outside. He hated the false pretense of calm and hope. Hated that the televisions were always muted; he couldn’t even get himself distracted even if he wanted to.

But most of all, he hated it because it reminded him of his own assault. He was no longer a teenager, but the shadow of memories and pain still lingered on even after all these years.

He blinked tiredly at his wristwatch. It read 3:45 AM. It had been more than 24 hours since he had last seen Sebastian’s face, and it took everything Blaine had in him to not cry right there and then at the thought of that. If he had known things would turn out this way, he wouldn’t have left his side. He wouldn’t have just left him with a “don’t take too long” as his final words. But that’s the thing about life – things hardly turned out the way people expected them to be. People always thought that they had more time, but did they really?

The only consolation he had, the only source of comfort he was desperately grasping onto, was the fact that Sebastian knew that Blaine loved him. He knew that if he had to go, at least he could leave knowing that he was truly loved in return.

Shaking his head, Blaine readjusted his mind as he looked over to where Quinn was sitting down and resting her head on the arm of the chair. They had hardly spoken to each other than the occasional ‘are you okay?’ and ‘do you want anything?’. Blaine didn’t trust himself with words right now, couldn’t, not when Sebastian was still unconscious.

This wasn’t about him. This was never about him. No matter how much he wanted to be by Sebastian’s side, taking his hand in his and holding onto it tightly. He couldn’t and he wouldn’t, not when his own feelings were incomparable to what Sebastian’s parents must be feeling inside. It must have been ten or twenty times worse to see their son completely motionless, not knowing what else they could have done to take away the pain, to protect their son from getting hurt in the first place.

A tear fell down his cheek and Blaine wiped it away quickly. It was then that the door opened and there stood Sebastian’s parents, informing them that Sebastian had finally woken up. Blaine was the first to stand up, but he hadn’t forgotten about Quinn. She never left the waiting room, despite the exhaustion that was etched across her face. And so when she deliberately hung back from seeing Sebastian, Blaine gently and carefully took her elbow, saying, “He almost lost the both of us. He’s going to want to see you too, Quinn.” Taking a breath, Blaine mustered up the only smile he had left and led her forward until they were both beside Sebastian’s bed.

Another short breath left Blaine’s mouth, before a small whimper escaped when he finally saw Sebastian’s face. The sight in front of him practically ripped Blaine’s heart out. Sebastian’s frame was swallowed in the white of the hospital blankets, skin tone almost matching. His chest was steadily rising and falling to the beep of the monitors he was hooked up. And all those tubes and wires…

His vision blurred as he rushed forward, half hugging Sebastian in that position before burying his face in his neck, feeling relieved but also still scared. This wasn’t fair, and he just wanted it all to disappear.

“Don’t you ever scare me like that again.” Blaine shook his head, his bottom lip trembling. He had never experienced such an intense pull, such an intense fear of losing another human being before. The idea of losing Sebastian forever twisted and clawed at his insides and he hugged him tighter, feeling the sting of unshed tears as they burned beneath his lids.

SEBASTIAN

As his parents left, the room fell silent, except for the monotone beep echoing against the walls every few seconds. He looked down at the IV in his hand, squeezing a gentle fist as he watched; it was just as numb as the rest of his body was. Even his brain felt a little numb and even black in some parts, and he hated trying to fill in the blanks. In some way it made him feel less than – not only did he get shot, but he also couldn’t remember how. The only worse thing that could happen would be for him to…

His eyes rose to the door, meeting both Blaine and Quinn as they entered. Before he had time to process it, Blaine was on top of him and Sebastian’s eyes fell shut. He mimicked his boyfriend, nuzzling his head into Blaine’s neck, taking in his familiar and comforting scent. He couldn’t find the right words to greet him, not knowing whether it would be appropriate to greet him at all. Instead, he let himself go, letting his body say whatever it felt.

“I love you…” he whispered softly against Blaine’s ear, his chest tightening as Blaine tightened around him. A moment passed before he pulled back and looked into his eyes, his good hand reaching up to cup Blaine’s cheek, stroking it softly with his thumb. “Please don’t cry, baby.” He slowly leaned in, pressing their lips together, his heart beating just a bit faster as he did. A moment passed before he pulled back, attention turning to Quinn. “You can have a kiss too, you know,” he joked, although it was a weak attempt, before gesturing her to come over, holding his arm open for a hug.

QUINN

Quinn was paralyzed.

Her fears were realized as she saw Sebastian laid up in the hospital bed, completely at the mercy of the machines that gripped at his entire body. Flashes of her father in the same predicament only heightened that fear and she gripped at the hem of her sweatshirt as she tried to suppress the tears that threatened to fall. 

Blaine’s reaction struck a chord with her. It was as if he’d seen into the very corners of her mind and expressed everything she was feeling, not only his words but the way he pulled Sebastian into his embrace. Quinn longed to embrace him like that but it was as if her body was out of her control, stuck. Everything from the previous night came back at once and she was reminded of how close they’d all been to losing everything. 

Quinn never believed in luck but they were all extremely lucky to be in this room. Alive.

She felt like an outsider looking in but as much as she wanted to look away, to give them a moment of privacy, she couldn’t muster up the strength it took to turn her head. She physically jumped when Sebastian finally addressed her and while she wanted to be angry at him for joking at a time like this, she couldn’t help but give into his attempt to break the tension. It was exactly what she needed to snap out of her immobility. 

“You’re ridiculous,” she said with a small laugh, the tears she’d been trying to hold back falling down her cheeks. Quinn stepped forward and carefully pressed her body against his, arm wrapping around his neck and she pressed her face into the crook of his neck, her tears wetting the skin there. “I’m so glad you’re okay.” Her words were no louder than a whisper. 

After a few moments, she pulled back and took Blaine’s hand in hers for just a moment, offering a smile much like he did when they walked into the room. Quinn took a seat on the bed next to Sebastian, resting her hand on his leg. “Do you know how long you have to stay here?” She asked, as her eyes moved to the door. “I’m sure your parents need to go get some rest. You too Blaine. I can stay here for a little bit while you guys go freshen up and catch a few hours of sleep.” There was no way Quinn was going to be able to sleep right now.

[quinninthecity]

wildeactually‌:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be spending the day locked away in my apartment with crappy throwback movies and popcorn. If anyone has any suggestions as to what I should add to the list, please feel free to comment. Please refrain from awful suggestions. Thanks.

You can never go wrong with a Grace Kelly or a Audrey Hepburn film.

[quinninthecity]

samactually‌:

I’ve got a serious case of The Mondays, but it sounds like everybody else might be having it worse. So give me the deets – how many HP did you lose this last week and how are you going to recover? I was thinking a movie night with a family-sized box of Lucky Charms and the comfiest PJs I own. If that doesn’t work, then maybe some drinks. Who’s on board?

HP? 

[bob-belcher]

The performance that made everyone cry. R.I.P Queen of Soul (x)

[quinninthecity]

Just when I thought I couldn’t take another blow, I find out Queen of Soul - Aretha Franklin is no longer with us. Anyone who knows me knows how much I idolized her. She was a talent like no other and will truly be missed. Anyone else distressed by this news?

[5feet12inches-deactivated201812]

Visit Original Link

[quinninthecity]

Aretha Franklin - (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.6

HUNTER: I'm sorry, Quinn. I hope it heals without leaving behind a scar.

QUINN: It’s not your fault, Hunter.

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.6

HUNTER: None of them were arrested because the police couldn't find anyone.

HUNTER: I told my men to sweep the entire ship clean and they did.

QUINN: Of course.

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.6

HUNTER: Who was it? Who did this to you?

QUINN: I don’t know, he was wearing a mask.

QUINN: And the thieves are apprehended, correct? I don’t want you taking matters into your own hands.

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.6

HUNTER: Stitches and fine don't go hand in hand.

HUNTER: What happened? Where were you hurt?

QUINN: I’ve been through worse.

QUINN: My neck.

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.6

HUNTER: Because of Sebastian?

QUINN: Yes.

[ a few moments later ]

QUINN: And because I needed to get a few stictches.

QUINN: But I’m fine.

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.6

[The day after]

HUNTER: I'm fine, Quinn.

HUNTER: My men told me they saw you leaving the ship and you looked fine.

HUNTER: Are you?

QUINN: I’m fine. I just left the hospital.

[smytheactually]

SHIP TO WRECK | SEQUAINE

[quinninthecity]

smytheactually‌:

WHO: Sebastian Smythe, Blaine Anderson, and Quinn Fabray. WHAT: Sebastian wakes up in the hospital and Blaine and Quinn are there to greet him.  WHEN: Monday, August 6th, 4:00 AM. WARNINGS: None.

SEBASTIAN

Sebastian’s could barely remembered what had happened; the most vivid things he had in his mind were the immediate burst of pain as he was shot, and the image of a person standing over a limp, bleeding body. It was something he would probably never forget, whether he wanted to or not. The pain had subsided now though, presumably from whatever was flowing through the IV in Sebastian’s arm, and instead replaced with a dull soreness. It was tolerable, as long as he didn’t move his right side too much.

As he spoke with his parents his head was fuzzy and light and keeping his eyes open proved to be a bit of a challenge. They asked about what had happened and made sure he knew they were very thankful he was okay, but were extremely unhappy with the Claringtons and their lack of basic security measures. His parents’ distaste for the Claringtons wasn’t Sebastian’s greatest concern in the moment though; instead, his mind wandered, landing on the thought of his boyfriend. “Where’s Blaine?” he asked suddenly, interrupting his parents’ rant. “Is Blaine okay?” His mind started to race, suddenly coming up with hundreds of horrible situations Blaine could have gotten into while Sebastian was even still in the casino. He should have never left him alone.

The steady beeping that had been filling the room began to speed up, and his mother quickly moved toward the bed, resting her hand gently on top of his leg. “Blaine’s fine, Sebastian,” his mother answered calmly, rubbing him softly through the blankets in attempt to calm him down. “He’s here, actually. With Quinn. Do you want to see them?”

With his mother’s confirmation, Sebastian’s breathing began to steady and he gave a confident nod in response. She turned to her husband and gestured toward the exit. “We’ll be right outside,” his father said, before leading his wife out into the waiting room toward Blaine and Quinn. “He wants to see you.”

QUINN

The entire day went by in a blur. Apparently the men who manhandled her and her mother were thieves who tried to get their hands on the Empress’ tiara. As soon as the ship docked, Quinn and her parents went to the hospital to get her neck looked at, though the real reason she agreed to go was because she knew Sebastian was going to be there. As soon as her cut was stitched up and patched up and she made her statement to the police, Quinn made her way over to the waiting room.

Still dressed in a pair of jeans and a sweater from the night before, she fixed her hair and covered her neck as much as she could before taking the seat next to Blaine and offering him a cup of coffee she brought for him. With no word on how he was doing or when they would be able to see him, Quinn decided she was just going to wait. She got a few hours of sleep, as much as she possibly could on the chair in the waiting room, and her mom was sweet enough to bring her a change of clothes as well as some food for her, Blaine, and Sebastian’s parents. By the time the sun set on Sunday night, Quinn had a knot in the pit of her stomach as she thought about the worst possible scenarios. But she continued to wait, she didn’t care how long it took for him to come to.

Quinn had just pulled herself from another small nap when she noticed his parents coming out of the room. It was still dark out and Blaine was still next to her. Relief washed over her entire body at the notion that he was finally awake and asking for them and she stood up immediately, fixed her appearance, and followed after Blaine. She wanted to see Sebastian, but was also a little scared about what she might find on the other side of the door. She knew her best friend well enough to know who he wanted to see first, so she hung back, not wanting to interfere with what was sure to be a very intimate moment. 

[quinninthecity]

F2F ➝ All Hands on Deck

[quinninthecity]

smytheactually‌: 

When Quinn moved to her new position, Sebastian turned toward her so he could see her face as straight on as possible. He had anticipated her lie but had expected it to be better, although with the amount of alcohol she had probably consumed, that might have been the best she could come up with. “No, you’re not,” he replied, reaching out to rest his hand on Quinn’s thigh. “If that were true we could have gotten drunk and avoided your parents together.” Despite having spent almost all of the cruise with Blaine, if he knew that Quinn was in such a bad place then he would have definitely made time to hang out with her. “Mitch Sinclair’s got blow too. That definitely would’ve been a distraction.” 

“He’s fine. You’re not,” he countered with a shake of his head. He knew Blaine wouldn’t mind if he took a pit stop to help out a friend. “ What’s wrong?” He didn’t want to start fishing, but if she wasn’t going to give it up, Sebastian had no other choice. “Is this about what your father’s doing? About what he asked me?” He didn’t get much from Quinn when he had told her he was declining his offer and wondered if she might be upset about that too. “C’mon, Quinn. Talk to me.”

Even though Quinn was expecting Sebastian to see through her farce, she was still visibly annoyed at his unwillingness to just accept it and move on. Her eyes focused on the weight of his hand on her thigh and the small amount of comfort it provided before she pulled away. “You’re here with your boyfriend, are you sure you would have made time for me?” As soon as the words left her mouth, she regretted them immediately. Quinn shook her head before turning up to meet his gaze. “That wasn’t fair for me to say. I’m not mad about you being here with Blaine. I wish that was it, but it’s not.” 

She sighed as her eyes fell back to her lap where she fidgeted with her fingers. Once it was clear that he wasn’t going to let up, Quinn knew that the only way he was going to leave her alone was if she told him what was bothering her. “I’m angry that my father is selling me to the highest bidder, that my mother is letting it happen, and-” She stopped herself from going on, wanting to choose her words carefully. Her eyes met his gaze and the genuine concern she saw there reminded her why he was her best friend in the first place. This was someone she could be honest with, she’d just forgotten that for a while. “I’m angry that you didn’t take the deal. Well, more so hurt, I suppose. But it’s irrational and not at all justified, which is why I didn’t want to tell you. It doesn’t matter how I feel, you made the right call. I wouldn’t want you giving up the opportunity to actually be happy with someone you love. You deserve all of that.”  

Sebastian

Sebastian’s brows rose at Quinn’s comment, taken back by her words, and if he was being honest, a little hurt as well. Sebastian had opened his mouth to tell her that of course he would have, especially if he knew she needed him, but just as he did, she continued on. “What are you mad at then?” he prompted. He could tell she really didn’t want to talk about any of it, but he didn’t know anything else that would help her feel better, especially if she had already drunk the deck’s entire bar. As she spoke, Sebastian stayed silent, wanting to take in each word and be sure not to interrupt. Of course she was angry at her parents; it was completely rational and anyone in her shoes would feel the same way. It was when she went on that his stomach sank and a small lump in his throat began to form. He didn’t realize that Quinn wanted him to take her father’s deal so badly. If he did, perhaps he would have sat on it a little while longer. “I’m sorry, Quinn,” he let out softly. “I’m really sorry.” He didn’t know of another time that he had ever hurt Quinn in a similar way and he had to admit, it felt like shit. “I didn’t know you wanted me to accept. I thought it was just a fair option to you.” His eyes fell as he thought, shaking his head, a little ashamed for not realizing it sooner. “I was thinking about it. I really was, but then I was talking to Blaine about it and he told me he loved me and I thought that made my decision much clearer,” he explained, although he wasn’t sure it would help. “If there was any way that I could marry you and still be with Blaine, I would do it. I would, but I don’t think an open marriage is what your father had in mind when he gave me his offer.”

Quinn

Quinn huffed and rolled her lips together as she considered his words. A large part of her wanted to interject, to tell him that there was nothing for him to apologize for. But the irrational side of her wanted him to feel bad, if only because she didn't want to be alone in that sense. So she remained silent until he said everything he needed to say. Sebastian was right, of course he was right. That was never in question. Her eyes dropped to where his hand was on her knee and she laced their fingers together, a way to ground herself and her thoughts. "Like I said, me feeling this way is completely irrational and you have nothing to apologize for." Bringing her eyes up to meet his again, she pulled all of her effort to offer him a small smile. "You taking the deal would have made me happy, but you would have hated me for it in the long run. And I really don't want to lose my best friend." Quinn pulled her hand back and shrugged, moving back on the chair so that she was leaning against the back of the chair and her legs were pulled into her chest. "You made the right decision. Sebastian. I'm just upset because I know my father is not going to stop until he's made a deal with someone and the uncertainty of 'who' is really starting to get to me." Quinn sighed as she leaned her chin onto her knees. "I'll be fine, Sebastian. Don't worry about me."

Sebastian

When Quinn took his hand he squeezed gently, looking from their hands back to her eyes. He clung to every word, and although he knew she didn’t want him to apologize, he couldn’t help but feel dejected about everything. He wanted to explain that if he and Blaine weren’t together that he would have taken no hesitation in accepting her father’s offer but he knew that wouldn’t make her feel any better. If anything, it may make her feel worse. He knew that she wasn’t keen on relationships, just as he used to be, but she had never experienced anything like he has with Blaine, which was exactly the reason why he kept pushing her to go out on dates. If she could find someone for her that she had a connection with that also fit her father’s criteria, maybe all was not lost after all...

But even he knew that was a reach. Maybe if they had known about it sooner, they could have figured out a solution, but now it seemed too late for all of that. “You shouldn’t have to go through this,” he let out softly so that only she could hear. “I’ve thought about moving back to Europe so many times. Sometimes it seems like the only way...”

[quinninthecity]

TEXT ✉ QUINNTER | 8.5

QUINN: Please tell me you're alright.

QUINN: What's going on?