Thinking about Shane being so aware of when Ilya seems upset and constantly reaching out, being so physically and verbally there for Ilya, repeatedly checking in and making sure Ilya knows heâs there, coming up with ways for Ilya to share his feelings when heâs struggling with it, holding him when heâs upset or talking about things that are hard
Thinking about Shane panicking after his dad catches them and just how much coaxing it takes for Ilya to get Shane into a hug, that he isnât expecting Ilya to want to come with him to deal with the fallout, that he immediately pushes back on Ilya calling him brave by reacting as if he thinks itâs a joke, that he only stays in the hug a few seconds before going down onto the ground, that up until Ilya pulls him in he seems so hesitant to physically reach out to Ilya for comfort
Thinking about Shane and Yuna outside talking and Yuna reacting emotionally to him being hurt and him looking away from her when she tries to comfort him, thinking about them hugging a bit before she pulls back and says âEnoughâ
Thinking about Shane panicking at the table and his parents silently watching, and how surprised he seems by Ilya reaching out verbally and physically to reassure him, that he is even more surprised that Ilya calls them boyfriends and cements the idea of them as a team
Thinking about Shane Hollander growing up in an extremely toxically masculine sport and having lots of support when things are going well but being very alone when heâs struggling, while clearly understanding how much unconditional love and support would help him because itâs what he constantly tries to give Ilya. Thinking about Shane knowing exactly what he needs but having never gotten it before so he doesnât know what to do with the bits and pieces heâs given
