Rainbow Room @rainbow-femme - Tumblr Blog

one night when shane falls asleep before ilya and ilya was scrolling on his phone shane suddenly jerks awake and before ilya could react shane turns over to him and whispers “oh thank god” in an almost raspy voice and glues himself around ilya who is still very confused until shane speaks again in his sleepy voice “i was so scared you wouldn’t be here when i wake up” and falls right back asleep.

he does not remember any of this the next morning

hardlyhinged

Op’s tags

sufjansjoy

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

sufjansjoy

wow

3000s

rainbow-femme

Everyone sees a post-retirement Shane meltdown coming a mile away unless they find something to fill the hockey shaped hole in his brain, and someone casually throws out Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and Shane figures well why not, can’t hurt to go to one class and see how it feels

He goes in and immediately, day one, gets his ass absolutely handed to him. Slammed to the ground, choked out, beat to shit, no rest no mercy the entire time and he LOVES it. Getting pushed and tested, needing to figure out strategy, fully working his muscles and getting thrown around. He comes home bruised and sore and can’t wait to go back

Ilya isn’t super sure at first about his husband getting recreationally beat up, especially after going to a practice early on and getting nauseous from watching people choking Shane and purposely putting him in so much pain he’s forced to tap out. The spouse of another person at the gym says to wait a few months before trying to watch again

But after a while he starts regularly hearing Shane laughing and Anya happy barking from other parts of the house, and walking in to find the two playfully wrestling around. Or when they watch the Pike kids they all want turns to get flipped around and wrestled by uncle Shane

And then of course one day Shane texts Ilya saying he wants Ilya to help him learn a triangle submission, and he adds a winky face and Ilya is just ??? Ok? I guess? But then he looks one up and well. That sure. Uh. That sure would be his husbands big strong sweaty thighs locked around his head and you know maybe he shouldn’t be too hasty to judge this hobby

Very soon Ilya is looking up moves for them to “practice” and he starts to see the appeal of his big strong husband being able to manhandle him and also anyone else. When he finally goes to watch another practice he sees Shane taking down guys six inches taller and fifty pounds heavier with ease and no actually so sorry they can’t go out to eat with everyone afterwards he needs to get his hot sweaty husband home immediately

The hockey world struggles to hide how pissed they are the first time Shane wins a tournament because of course he can’t retire normally and had to go and become the best at something else, specifically something that means he could beat the shit out of any of them if he wanted

rainbow-femme

Troy: “So you’re really ok with Shane practicing martial arts on you??”

Shanes recent search history:

Ilya: “What can I say, I am a very selfless husband.”

northern-punk-lad

It’s going to be an interesting few weeks following this result and it will empower reform voters

invisible-goats

and now he has to actually face the enquiry he was trying to avoid

becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys

That is a much higher voteshare to Binface than we expected, and much lower to both Reclaim and British Democratic Party, lol.

All round, though, it doesn't look good for Farage. It was a sham one-party election, so he can't play the "See? No one cares about my multimillion pound bribes, they still voted me in" card he was banking on. His only competition was a bin, and the bin actually did well. Meanwhile, as Goats says, he's now subject to the enquiry he tried to avoid.

He played a strategy that was supposed to be win-win, but the other major parties totally hamstrung it. And, credit where credit's due, the idea for the others to not stand this time was an absolutely genius move that, in fact, came from the static TV screen of a brain that belongs to, of all people, Kemi fucking Badenoch. Stopped clocks and that.

Meanwhile, polling shows Farage has actually lost a LOT of his voter base and support from the bribe thing. Again - even Kemi Badenoch is able to go "Hardly the man of the working class like he claims". So... Yeah. As OP says - interesting next few weeks coming

aslongasitsblack

a man who has never denied himself anything meets a man who denies himself everything and the hedonist tries to lure the self-abnegator into succumbing to the pleasures of the flesh and succeeds but their rendezvous makes accidentally clear that true pleasure is derived from the perilous destructive nature of intimate connection and eventually true actual love and so we come to conclude that in fact the hedonist is the one who has never allowed himself anything true while the self-abnegator has never strayed from the path of his want and then they put them on ice skates and gave them sticks

aslongasitsblack

the people reblogging this and saying ‘if this was how it was sold to me i would’ve actually watched it but now its too late’ ….come live in my beautiful world

asteroidtroglodyte

I do enjoy a good visual gag, and an old favorite of mine is “there is Math on a Board in the background that contextually makes no sense.” This broadly comes in 3 flavors I enjoy:

• the board is in front of a classroom, and the Math is waaay too advanced for whatever level of pupil these kids are supposed to be; like having the calculus integral in front of kindergartners, or relativistic physics in front of high schoolers.

• the board is in front of Criminals, who are Planning Something, and by all rights there ought to be no Math there to begin with. Like. You’re planning a Heist why do you have the Full Lagrangian on there. Are we taking a rocket to the bank.

• the characters are super-genius science fiction people. The Math is “Pi≈3.24” with an unlabeled pie chart.

elizabethboleyn

What is your quintessential Katherine of Aragon portrait?

1.. The Michael Sittow portrait

2. The portrait that pairs with a portrait of younger Henry VIII

3. The Lucas Horenbout miniature

4. The Lucas Horenbout portrait with the monkey

5. The Joannes Corvus portrait

6. Something else. e.g the Juan de Flandes or KoA as Mary Magdalene/Virgin Mary

Remaining time: 1 day 15 hours

emziess

I think I'm invincible. It's the only thing that makes sense. I don't think I can die.

The Nice Guys dir. Shane Black

podcastwizard

every day i walk into work and my manager says “here is the rule you must enforce” and i go “got it bossman” and i spend a couple days enforcing the rule and then my manager comes up to me and says “why are you enforcing the rule? we changed the rule yesterday and didn’t tell you” and i go “ok bossman new rule it is” and then a customer comes in asking to break the new rule and i say “sorry you can’t it’s the rule” and they say “but you don’t understand the rule doesn’t apply to me” and then my manager comes out and says “they’re right the rule doesn’t apply to them” and i ask why and my manager says “it just doesn’t.” and then the next day we get rid of the rule entirely and no one remembered it existed in the first place.

anyway this sounds like a metaphor for neurodivergence or something but it’s not this is just my fucking life

rhaemonds

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE 3.02 | Toledo

#he’s so annoying I love him

rin-an

@kegareki

YOU!!!!! YOU UNDERSTAND ME.

welp, here’s a viewer-generated sequel to the death-note-in-year-2020 shitpost saga.

cannibalchicken

iamoutofideas

the j

aymmidumps

Neil’s kidnapping in TKM, from Andrew’s POV (an excuse to draw Andrew in sheer desperation)

captaindamianos

@blue-eyed-korra asked for lamen cuddles back in May when I asked for prompts. I hope it's alright, it didn't work out quite the way I wanted, so it's a bit messy.