Holly Golightly

I, too, am a wild thing.

[anditslove]

Matt Haig, The Comfort Book

[rantsofawildthing]

right. and that's why I never let anyone too close.

almost forgot it.

[rantsofawildthing]

just when you thought you already found your "people"

...

getting disappointed gets easier as we grow older, no?

[rantsofawildthing]

If he only knows how hard I'm busting my ass off trying to find the perfect suppliers that wouldn't bust our wallets and looking for so many inspirations online.

Even have a gsheets and all that. Call that unhealthy but this is our wedding we're talking about.

I don't even expect him to do much except to earn money during our prep period, be excited together with me, understand me with my frustrations with the preparation, and just be present at the wedding. IS THAT SO HARD?!

I'm crying because I'm literally so mad rn.

[rantsofawildthing]

Huh. I find myself using Tumblr again after being inactive for who knows how long. I'm that desperate.

Update– got engaged a few days ago.

I act fast so I might have been a little too deep with researching wedding stuff. But only because I'm excited to look for suppliers who'll help make our wedding come to life.

I have a live training that I'm attending at the moment but I told him that I couldn't focus. Then I sent a sample video from one of the suppliers that I want (but can't get 'cause they're too expensive) and thought that the concept was so good, and what do I get?

Hindi raw healthy yung ginagawa ko. Doesn't he experience being inattentive with an event he's attending and instead would look at other stuff online?! Well... sorry if I'm a little too excited????

That's the ONE THING. LITERALLY THE ONLY THING I SENT THAT'S WEDDING RELATED.

HE TALKS ABOUT CRYPTO AND CHARTS ALL DAY AND I TRY TO UNDERSTAND AND KEEP MYSELF ENTERTAINED BECAUSE I KNOW HE JUST WANTS TO EARN MONEY FOR US.

BUT I SENT ONE SAMPLE VIDEO THAT I'M SO HYPED ABOUT AND HE TELLS ME IT'S UNHEALTHY?!

AH LORD PLEASE HELP ME FIND GRACE. I'M SO FREAKING ANNOYED AND MAD.

I'M EVEN DESPERATE ENOUGH TO POST OVER HERE AND JUST RANT.

[rantsofawildthing]

I've always wanted to write a book.

Or write books, perhaps.

Either way, I pray that a year from now I've already published one and succeeding in this career path.

Not manifesting but walking by faith! ✍🏼📖

[perfectfeelings]

[rantsofawildthing]

When will our story begin?

~

At times, it feels like I've been supporting you for my entire life—

your dreams, your responsibilities, your passions, and even your pains.

At times, it feels like I've been giving and loving more.

It feels as if I'm loved and cared for less.

I'm still a woman after all and maybe that's why I still long to be pampered—

randomly given flowers,

given sweet messages,

gifted with something nice,

treated with no questions or hesitations,

assured that I'm loved and still beautiful.

I honestly feel petty for feeling this way that I almost pity myself.

But I still can't help but feel so unloved.

[rantsofawildthing]

At the most random days, I still get the feeling that I want to pursue something that's related to my hobbies (reading books, writing poetry and maybe try for a novel, or anything artsy related) and make a living out of it.

So easy to be pulled by these thoughts whenever I go back to watching Haley Pham's vlogs!

It's been too long but I still don't know whether this is something that's not really for me or if I'm just afraid to take risks.

[rantsofawildthing]

First day of physically reporting to the U office— I'm shaking! When did all this happen? Lord, help me today. 🥹

[rantsofawildthing]

That moment when you don't feel like anyone's favorite person.

[rantsofawildthing]

Deep cuts come with deep love.

[rantsofawildthing]

It's a truth universally acknowledged that the moment one area of your life starts going okay, another part of it falls spectacularly to pieces.

From my all-time comfort movie, Bridget Jones' Diary.

[rantsofawildthing]

Office meeting and planning.

How do corporate people do this all their lives?

I don't understand anything at all, not even the core of what they're all talking about. 😣

[drawwithvelo]

Common art misconceptions | Hello Tumblr! | Twitter

[drawwithvelo]

(Adult) Human Proportions

Finished the first basic anatomy tutorial! This is all very widely spread info that was handed to me like day 2 of art school, but I wanted to have my own version so that I can share it freely.

[rantsofawildthing]

seems like a good reference I can go back to 

[rantsofawildthing]

~birthday rant for my 24th~

Removed my birth date on my facebook account... just because.

But I didn’t expect to be this disappointed for not having literally any of my closest friends greet me. 

Not to be petty, but they could’ve remembered somehow and took maybe a minute or two just to send a greeting my way or something?

Lol I know people are busy with their lives and that I’m not the main character in their own story, but to not remember your supposedly close friend’s special day is a bit too disappointing tbh. 

What can I do though? At least I got to see who really remembers.

Because I have a hard time remembering birth dates of my friends, I decided to mark it already on my calendar and have it on repeat yearly just so I wouldn’t forget. 

I mean... I always make efforts for other people, or at least try to, just so I can make them feel loved in any way that I can and yet I feel as if no one’s even doing the same thing for me. It feels as if no one’s even trying.

Ofc there are still people who greeted me and I’m eternally grateful for them!

The disappointment just hits a bit different though.

Cherry on top is that my boyfriend’s not even here due to his office’s summer outing. Greeted me but there’s all there is to it. No flowers? Cake? Anything extra special? 

Guess not.