#existential crisis

[vieira030]

it's really crazy and i don't know if it's common, but there are days i make absolute bangers and others i cry cause i can't put a chord progression together, y'know. i don't know if it's lack of practice or study, but regardless i want to figure it out. today i made one of the coolest melodies i've ever done, tomorrow i might be crying about something else. i'll keep evolving though hehe...

[cherieonttop]

o kizlar gibi mi olmak istiyroım yoksa bu kizlar gibi mi olmak istiyorum kendim gibi olmak icin hangisi olmam gerekiyor ben hangisiyim her an hepsi olabilirim her zaman ayni kisi degilim ben olsaydım hangisini secerdim ozumde kimim en iyi halime nasil ulasabilirim hicbiri ben degil miyim su an bile ben degil miyim bu ben degilsem kim beynimi yoneten kim oldugumu sandigim kisi kim gecrekten o degil miyim onun kim oldugunu da bilmiyorum ama bi sey oldugumu sandigim kesin ama o olup olmadigim kesin degil oldugumu sandigim kisi yok bile ama olmamasi mumkun degil oldugumu sandigim kisinin olmadigini dusunmem bile bi sey dusunduruyo sonucta bu dsundugum sey bile yanlis hissettiriyo yine yanlis kisi miyim dogru kisi kim dogru kisi nasil olabilirim ona nasil ulasabilirim ona ulastigimi nasil anlayabilirim o oldugumu fark edemezsem ve omrumun sonuna kadar arayısa devam edersem ve en sonunda yetmis yasinda parkta oturuken fark edersem ve fark ettigim sey aslında basından beri dogru kisi olmayı anlamaya calısan kisi olmanın beni dogru kisi yapan sey oldugu olursa ne tarafta en rahat hissederim veya herhangi bir zaman herhangi bir sekilde rahat hissedebilecek miyim

?

sdece soruyorum ?

[noctumsolis]

I love programming. The process, the act, is such a fucking glorious thing. Maddeningly frustrating a lot of the time, but so wonderful.

And I revel in the differences between languages. There are languages that are so elegant, sleek, effective; they're beautiful. And others that are clunky, bloated and plain bad but still worth using.

The idea of these things being lost breaks my heart.

The thought that people might stop developing languages, because who needs to when humans aren't even writing the code...

It's unbearable and it makes me wish I'd never become a coder in the first place. Then I wouldn't know what might be lost.

And if that which I have put so much of myself into is lost, then what survives of that part of me?

[whateveriam17]

Do you ever just wonder what the fuck are we gonna do on this planet for the next so many years?

Because my existential crisis keeps making me think about this question and I still don't have any answer

[problemed-motherfucker]

Not having a name is a whole special kind of identity crisis cause tf you mean i have no set of morphines ive assigned to myself and my brain and consciousness and body at the moment what do u mean i gotta build that whole cornerstone of my personhood a-fucking-gain 🫠

[the-lesbians-made-me-do-it]

I'm not a they anymore sorry guys I had a minor existential crisis

Anyways just she/her now

[veltroxx]

everyones talking about complicated spreadsheets?! wait, did i just stumble into a corporate horror film where the plot twist is that efficiency is aesthetic? send help, im having an existential crisis in the break room!

[celestial-choc0late]

I giggle as I imagine myself being a high paid escort. In the wake of potentially being fired from my job, having stood up for myself for what may be the very last time, I ponder how I’m going to make money after this. Yes I’m not prepared. Yes I’ll have to say I’m unemployed yet again, but I still think there’s hope. And if anything, at-least I could “spread sum” right?

A video of a vetted, famous actor came up on my YouTube feed. I was curious and clicked. This actor was a huge part of my childhood. Now that I’m grown, I do tend to fantasize about what’s it’s be like to date that 90s hottie in this day and age. Anyways, I click on the video and the first sentence he says is, “listen up”. “Yes daddy” I respond, batting my eyes at the television. I try to psych myself out a bit. My mind begins to spin with thoughts. “Could I have him as a client”. The smirk on my face turns to a light grimace. “No no I couldn’t do it” I chuckle to myself out loud.

Well that career option is out.

But I couldn’t help but nestle into my mind during times like these. It seems to happen annually. It has been an occurrence since childhood. Somehow I ended up hated. And because of that, sometimes I hated myself. I was always confused. I mean I must be a bad person if they all teamed up against me? Yes, lies were told on me. Assumptions were made about me. All anyone could say was, “that’s what you get”. So does that mean I maybe a bad person? And if I am, how can I stop?

Will I finally become psychotic?

Maybe I’ll have to hide behind my brand.