argyle is the person you want on your team in an apocalypse
LOOK AT THIS LOOK AT THIS:
WOODWORKING skills
COOKING skills
TRACKING skills
FORAGING SKILLS??!
GUYS????? argyle needs to and will hopefully become an integral, ESSENTIAL member of the big kids gang. he knows so much and this is only addressing his survival skills
Summary: Finally, after two previous attempts, Edward “Eddie” Munson has finally graduated college. In the months following his shining achievement, Eddie starts a job as a mechanic, gets the trailer to himself, and even moves his girlfriend, y/n, in with him. What could be better than spending his time with his sweetheart??
Fucking her.
Word Count: 2.3k
Author’s Note: This is my first lil’ fic! I hope you guys enjoy the absolute porn that this is. I need to get myself back into the groove of writing (and deal with trying to find a different job) but once I do, boy, y’all best look out! Anyways, please enjoy! My ask box is also open so send me any requests you want to read :)
Also: I’m adding a little bit of lore, character building, relationship building, whatever you want to call it into the work since I kinda want to make everything in each fandom’s universe like it’s own little canon? Like, e.g.; Steve and his partner go to the county fair or something in one fic, maybe in another Eddie and his partner go to the county fair and see Steve and his partner doing something they did in the other fic; or something like that lol!
Tags: 18+, MINORS DNI., porn w/ plot (if you squint), smut, rough sex, female anatomy terms, fingering, oral sex (f rec.), choking, spitting, established relationship, dirty talk, Eddie is a mechanic :), ugh just writing that was sexy, Eddie also has a small inner crisis over the term “daddy”
The small town of Hawkins, Indiana all gathered together under the florescent gymnasium lights to watch the class of 1986 graduate and go along their ways to becoming college students, parents, or whatever other path they chose to pursue. The crowd grew silent, besides the screams from the Hellfire Club and those close to the graduate, as Edward Munson’s name was called and the rocker slowly made his way to the stage. He looked to his people, held up a rock sign, blew a kiss to a certain [h/c] haired girl wearing his vest, “Way to go Eddie!” Her voice reached his ears and the man gave a triumphant huff before he walked the stage.
He slowly approached where Principal Higgins was standing, his hand extended for a handshake. Eddie just grinned, held up a middle finger, grabbed the diploma from the mans hand, and bolted out of the gym, those cheering for him in the stands rushing out after him.
“There she is… my inspiration…” Eddie smirked as she approached him.
[Y/N]. She was the girl of his ever loving dreams and somehow he was lucky enough to have her as his. The two had met when she transferred to Hawkins High from a nearby school her junior year, his first senior year. She was immediately on his radar and soon he was asking her to join Hellfire and the two had been history since. “You know, if it wasn’t for you, [y/n], I probably wouldn’t have been able to pass Mrs. O’Donnell’s class. All that studying we did really made a big difference, hm?” Delete Created with Sketch.
Eddie sung out as he strummed a few open fret chords on his guitar, his eyes turning towards the cozy bundle of blankets that was giggling on his bed, “Well well. I wonder where [y/n] is? Usually she’s rushing up to greet me when I get home. Oh well.. I might as well.. take a NAP!” He shouted as he pulled back the covers, leaning down to capture his love’s plump lips in a warm kiss.
“Personally… I think you’re gonna give KISS a run for their money…” She sat up, stretching out before she stood, her feet getting swept out from under her as he was picking her up and carrying her towards a cleared space on his dresser top, “So.. how was work? Did you get to work on any cool cars today?” She hummed and swung her legs and he pulled his hair back and changed his shirt, giving her a kiss each time he would pass by her.
“Hmm… well… That truck that you think it just soooo sexy came in for an oil change. I told him that my girl always says it’s her dream truck every time we see it. I have to tell you he was rather flattered… blushed, even; I might have to be keepin’ a closer eye on you…” He said huskily, pressing a rough kiss to the corner of her mouth before his lips trailed down to roam over her neck. He left a few hickeys in his wake, going back every now and then to leave another kiss on top of his marks, “But… fuck me… I couldn’t get you out of my fucking head… all… day… I was just thinking about this morning…” He nearly purred, reminiscing against her skin as his fingers fluttered under the hem of her shirt and traced gentle patterns over her stomach.
“Mmh… well I couldn’t get you off my mind… all I did after your uncle left for work was lay in bed, smoke some pot, and let my mind wander thinking aaallllll about you,” She purred, her hips rotating to meet his palm as he held her hips, squeezing the flesh, “My poor little fingers got all cramped up… they just don’t feel as good as yours, baby…” Her voice came out as a near whimper as his hands found her breasts, his fingers brushing over her perky nipples; he rolled the sensitive bud between his fingers and basked in her whimper.
“Oh~? So, tell me, my beloved; what did you do? Tell me all about it…” A grin spread across his flushed face as his eyes seemed to darken with lust, the once rich forest of browns and green specks now hidden behind a dark cloud of desire. Without wasting another moment, Eddie scooped her up and carried her towards their bed, laying her amongst their messy bedding, “I want you to tell me every. single. things. you. did.” He said through gritted teeth, his ring-adorned fingers moving to tug at the delicate fabric of her panties as they peaked out from under his favorite DIO shirt she had decided to sport that day.
“E… Everything?” She whimpered.
“Everything.” He demanded back to her, the straining bulge fighting in his jeans getting some relief as he rubbed himself up against her thigh, “How did you touch yourself? What did you think about… was it me? Who did you fucking cum for.” He nearly rambled with desperate eyes on her, “C’mon baby… please… let me hear that pretty mouth tell me how you want me to fuck you…”
Y/n felt her heart drop into her cunt as his thumb made contact with her sensitive, eager clit, “W… Well… I was listening to the newest W.A.S.P. vinyl we got and Love Machine came on and I just got to thinking about the night we got that record…” She blushed, her flush only deepening when Animal (Fuck Like a Beast) came on over the tape deck’s speakers, the opening riff sending a shiver down her spine.
My fingers worked those tight, precise circles over my puffy, aching clit, just like he does. Only, I need more… My fingers dipped lower to press against my waiting core and no longer could I hold back my sob of his name, “Oh… Oh Eddie!”
By the time she was done reminiscing, she was already getting all of her fantasies brought to life. Eddie had tossed her panties aside, his fingers slipping through her slick folds a few times; he let them stop and draw spirals over her swollen clit a few times, “Jesus H. Christ your cunt is fucking dripping…” he groaned before he was burying his fingers to the rings inside of her.
“Oh god!!” She cried out as his fingers curled against the spongey wall of her g-spot, his fingers thrusting roughly against the sensitive spot as he leaned down to devour her pussy in an opened mouth kiss.
A soft ‘y/n…’ left Eddie’s mouth between groans and kisses, her taste on his tongue just feeling like too much for the man’s brain to handle. He pulled back, tugging her clit along with him, “Fuck… c’mere…” He groaned, his hands gripping her hips and holding them to his face as he desperately suckled on her clit, his tongue working as well on the bud to get her legs flailing as he made her cum for the first time that night. Eddie lapped up all of her juices and left a few more kisses to her overstimulated clit, “Heh… sorry can’t - mph - get enough of this delicious fucking pussy…” He confessed as he dived back in, his expert set of tools having her gushing on his tongue again in no time. He dropped her hips after he helped her ride out her orgasm on his tongue, Eddie roughly fighting his way out of his pants and boxers. His thick, pierced cock sprung up to greet her and she moved to get on her kneed for him, though she didn’t get far. His guitar-calloused fingers dug into her thighs as he got her back on her back, his hands pushing her glistening thighs apart, “You ready for it, baby?”
She nodded shakily and as soon as he began to press his fat cock into her she threw her head back and let out a moan of pleasure. He pulled out and tried again, pushing all the way in with one swift thrust; a howl left y/n’s throat as her lover stretched her into his shape. Y/n wasn’t the only one struggling though as a strangled moan came from Eddie, his mind breaking over just how tight and wet and warm his darling little lover’s cunt was. He took some time to let her adjust and get used to his size before she nodded a little and let him know he could move. Eddie, even though he wanted to work his way up and be gentle with her a little bit, he went right to pounding her cute little ass into the mattress.
“Oh god!! Eddie! H.. Harder daddy!!” She nearly screamed before his hand was wrapped around her throat, his brain processing what she had just let slip from her lips so casually. He nodded his head a little with a smirk and added more force to his thrusts, the harsh slapping from their skin meeting echoing through the trailer. Eddie could have sworn that with the way the bed was slamming against the wall that the entire trailer had to be quaking.
“That fucking face you’re making is just… fuck…” he groaned as he leaned forward to grab the Polaroid camera sitting on the bedside stand. He held the camera above them, pulled her head back a little with her hair, and snapped a picture of the two. He handed the printed picture to a brain dead y/n for her to shake while he sat the camera back down and went back to fucking her even stupider than she already was.
‘I do whatever I want to, to ya,
I’ll nail your ass to the sheets;
A pelvic thrust and the sweat starts to sting ya,
I fuck like a beast!’
The music from the speakers blared on as Eddie’s hips matched with the pounding rhythm of the W.A.S.P. song. He hummed along to it through grit teeth as his hands hooked under the backs of y/n’s knees; he then folded her in half and put her into a mating press before he began to hammer his hips into her, “Fuck I wish we could handle the risk of a kid right now… I want to breed the ever loving fuck out of you, y/n, baby~” the metal head purred as she tightened up around him, the admission of such primal desire sending a burning heat right to her core.
“W… Wait… Eddie… I got on the pill…” She said softly, both of their faces lighting up with mere glee, “Please daddy… I want all of you…” She said softly with a smile on her kiss bruised lips. She barely had time to think after she stopped speaking as a yelp slipped from her lips, Eddie now brutally pounding her into the mattress; his heavy balls slapping against her ass as he pushed more and more towards finally getting to fill her up for the very first time.
“Shit babe… you’re gonna cum, huh?” Eddie huffed with a chuckle as his stomach rested against hers, his lips locking with hers in a messy embrace. His thrusts had slowed to deep, harsh gyrations of his hips as he watched y/n struggle to keep her mind intact and her eyes focused as he got her right to the edge.
Then he stopped.
“letmecum… soclose…” she slurred and tried to push her hips against him for any kind of friction.
“Hehehe… what are the *magic words, *my beautiful, fair maiden?” He teased, his voice in an accent she recognized as her D&D character’s lover, Mithralika (named with a play on Metallica, of course).
“Please… sire?”
“No.”
“P… Please… Master…?” She whimpered as the title left her lips.
Eddie smirked and began pounding into her as his palm pressed against the bulge in her belly from each thrust of his fat cock. His thumb found her clit and began to rub desperately over her clit as they both chased their highs. Y/n came first with a wild howl of her name, Eddie following right after her. A growl grumbled deep in his chest as he pulled back and slammed into her, laying his weight into her pussy as he filled her past the brim with his thick, white cum. Eddie grabbed the Polaroid camera still on the nightstand and pulled out slowly, taking a snap of his cum leaking out of the love of his life’s pretty, abused cunny. Once again, Y/n was handed the picture and she shook it, blushing when she he snatched it and slipped the very graphic photo into his wallet on the nightstand.
Eddie stood and stopped y/n quickly as she started to stand as well, “Oh no no no no, you get to stay here. Let me get you some water and I’ll get you a nice hot bubble bath started up,” He said with a gentle voice and smiled at her, giving her a soft kiss when she nodded before he disappeared down the hallway. He came back shortly with a glass of water and left to go run her a bath. He eventually came back with her favorite robe and slippers in his hands, “C’mon my dear, lets get you in the bath.” He smiled and took her still-trembling hand.
The slow walk to the bathroom was filled with sweet giggled and soft kisses as y/n tried her hardest to walk on her very wobbly legs. She settled down into the oat and honey scented bubble bath and looked up at Eddie with puppy dog eyes when he turned to leave,
Fenris has the best recruitment quest in DA2, and you cannot change my mind.
No really, for everyone else, Hawke pretty much just walks in on a potential companion at some strangely opportune time, and the latter then asks for Hawke’s help with a personal dilemma. For example, Hawke goes to Sundermount to repay Flemeth’s favor outside of Lothering, and while stopping by in the Dalish camp Marethari and Merrill ask Hawke to take the latter to Kirkwall. Hawke strolls into Anders’s clinic to ask about the Deep Roads maps, and Anders expresses reluctance until it suddenly occurs to him that they might be able to provide backup for the rescue mission he had already planned for that very same night (gee, wonder why Cassandra got suspicious that Hawke had come to Kirkwall specifically to “spread subversion against the Chantry”?). Hawke heads back to the Hanged Man, presumably to do what people usually do in bars, and finds Isabela in the midst of a fight, after which she asks them to back her up in that very same night’s duel. And so on. All fair enough.
But Fenris literally asks a guy to stand around posing as a drug dealer (pretending that he’s smuggling lyrium to the Templars, in a conversation which potentially triggers the Codex entry for a gang of thieves called the Coterie), sending out letters to every gang he knows, and see whatever lowlife dumbass would agree to hunt down a stolen stash of fantasy meth. When Hawke and friends do find the “bait” and successfully beat off dozens of Tevinter slave catchers, Fenris is just… so surprised that they actually survived and pulled it off. “Had I known Anso would find me a man/woman so capable, I might have asked him to look sooner.” If Hawke gets angry at him for lying (you know, about this being a drug trafficking operation?), he straightforwardly admits that he deceived them because he didn’t think anyone in their right mind would knowingly agree to what he really wanted them to do — which, fair enough, is a good description of the whole point of lying — before he starts outright begging Hawke to help him out a second time. Then if Hawke agrees, he insults their friends and calls their sister a “viper” on the way out, all while the game gives you the option to respond to his complaints about life in slavery by telling him how hot and sexy he is. The first time he’s too flustered to respond but after the second weird flirt he just dryly replies, “You say what's on your mind, I'll give you that.” After listening to him talk about being fearful and suspicious of mages, you can be like, ‘Wanna go treasure hunting deep in the bowels of the earth, weeks apart from civilization, with nothing but two mages and a handful of dwarven criminals to keep you company?’ and he’s immediately packing his bags for the trip.
The hype is real and I needed to get this out of my system. True, I could have picked another wolf or even a dragon type villager for Ismene, but she’s got that epithet of ‘the stray’ so I made her a dog.
It dawned on me too that you could conceivably draw the parallel of Skyrim having few voice actors to the different personality types the villagers have… Did I overthink this? Maybe. Was it fun? Hell yes.
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