Trapped in the talkative cycle

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Trapped in the talkative cycle
Seven Syllables Of A Haiku Obscured By A Vegan Hotdog, 2014 Alt-Lit ***
this is the goddamn fucking height of literature and billiam spearmint or whatever his name was can eat it
certified iconic post
So you didn't try the ol' "I like your shoelaces" on bag girl?
i didn’t want to seem weird :/
Fun fact: i used to wear curly laces and I {notoriously absent minded} would usually just say "Thanks!! They're my favorite"
And everyone was like "oh."
And then I remembered it was also a Tumblr thing and would be like "ohh. My bad my bad, yes, they're stolen"
whoops lost myself for about eight years there
DELETE THIS POST
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
*clicks play in morbid curiosity*
*hammers reblog button*
I think I find this post every April Fools Day and I am so happy that I do
WHAT THE FUCK
This is a neutral post
Feel free to stop here and rest before journeying to the posts below.
spreading these occasionally would be nice…
As someone with major anxiety who can’t fucking stop themself from scrolling, i appreciate posts like this
Every time I see one
what do people in their twentys do except go to the grocery store……….
sometimes we lie in bed paralyzed by the knowledge that life is neither meaningful nor enjoyable
and then we go get snacks
i have feelings for u. not telling u which ones.
Let’s not forget to acknowledge Alexandre Dumas this Black History Month
The writer of two of the most well known stories worldwide, The Three Musketeers and The Count of Monte Cristo was a black man.
That’s excellence.
Let’s not forget that he was played on screen by a white man. And the fact that he was black is barely ever mentioned or the book he wrote inspired by his experiences.
Other things not to forget about Alexandre Dumas:
chose to take on his slave grandmother’s last name, Dumas, like his father did before him.
grew up too poor for formal education, so was largely self-taught, including becoming a prolific reader, multilingual, well-travelled, and a foodie, resulting in his writing both a combination encyclopedia/cookbook (which just— is fucking outrageous to me) AND the adaptation of The Nutcracker on which Tchaikovsky based his ballet
he also wrote a LOOOOT of nonfiction and fiction about history, politics, and revolution, bc he was pro-monarchy, but a radical cuss, and that got him in a lot of hot water at home and abroad.
even beyond that, he generally put up with a lot of racist bullshit in France, so he went and wrote a novel about colonialism and a BLATANTLY self-insert anti-slavery vigilante hero (which he then cribbed from to write the Count of Monte Cristo, the main character of which, Edmond Dantés, Dumas also based on himself).
(…a novel which also features a LOAD of PoC beyond the Count, and at LEAST one queer character, btw, bc EVERY MOVIE ADAPTATION OF ANYTHING BY DUMAS IS A LIE; seriously, at LEAST one of the four Musketeers is Black, y'all.)
famously, when some fuckshit or other wanted to come at Dumas with some anti-Black foolishness, Dumas replied, “My father was a mulatto, my grandfather was a Negro, and my great-grandfather a monkey. You see, Sir, my family starts where yours ends.”
for the bicentennial of his birthday, Pres. Jacques Cirac was like, “…sorry about the hella racism,” and had Dumas’s ashes reinterred at the Panthéon of Paris, bc if you’re gonna keep the corpses of the cream of the crop all together, Dumas’s more widely read and translated than literally everybody else.
and they are still finding stuff old dude wrote, seriously; like discovering “lost” works as recently as 2002, publishing stuff for the first time as recently as 2005.
ALSO IMPORTANT:
SWAG
I am absolutely ashamed to admit I had NO idea Dumas was black.
when this post first went around (a year ago apparently) I was like BUT WHAT ABOUT DADDY DUMAS THOUGH because basically
daddy general dumas was an immense fierce french warrior who was a 6 foot plus, stunningly gorgeous and charismatic Black gentleman
he invaded egypt
the native egyptians said “is this napoleon? this must be napoleon. we for one welcome our majestic new overlord”
then napoleon showed up
napoleon has all the presence of yesterday’s plain Tesco hummus
the native egyptians were like “… no… no, we’ve thought very hard and we’ll have General Dumas actually”
this did not make napoleon happy
in fact it made him jealous
napoleon felt so emasculated that he launched a campaign of revenge against General Dumas, including taking away his pension, that probably inspired a lot of Alexandre’s rather satisfying scenes in which fathers are nobly avenged and the money-grubbing villains are rubbed in the mud
I was never taught that he was Black either. WTF.
General Dumas (aka Thomas Alexandre Davy de La Pailleterie) looked like this…
…and like this…
…while “Napoleon has all the presence of yesterday’s plain Tesco hummus“…
:-D
I suspect Alexandre Dumas would have laughed at that, because besides looking like someone who laughed a lot…
…he was also a foodie.
He was also born in present-day Haiti. Back then, it was the French colony of Saint-Domingue.
ooooooh well then
There are legit no limits to how much I adore Alexandre Dumas, none at all, and I will fite anyone who claims that casting a black man as a musketeer (like BBC did a few years back) is somehow wrong ALSO look at his hair that is a Fierce ‘do for someone living in the age of pomaded slick hair and artificial whipped cream-y waves.
Fave
With the addition that Porthos by the end of the Musketeers series is heavily implied to be on his way to becoming Daddy Dumas.
love how when i get a new interest, i’m like “oh god it’s happening again” and i’m stuck like that for about a week until everything explodes and any interest i’ve had prior is completely dwarfed for an unknown amount of time
like this
shoutout to everyone who’s sharing the interest that has caused their category 7 autism event. we are all whirling around in our autism events together
All I need is for someone to gently cup my face and tell me I'm not as doomed as I feel.
reblog to gently cup your mutual’s face and tell them they’re not as doomed as they feel
Took me until about halfway through college before I realized “study” means “play with the material in a variety of ways until you understand it” and not just “read the assigned chapters and do the homework” and I think that probably should have been discussed at some point prior to that.
thinking about how the tone after book 2 goes from lighthearted middle grade to more YA and a lot more dark/serious without losing the initial humour that drew me to the series!!
*supposed to be packing bc apparently have a family trip, instead sitting in a hot hiding spot watching YouTube*
“I’m bored, let’s read fanfiction”
why must we network. isn't my kindness and willingness to try to be better everyday enough?