[reallymisssummer]

About

This account serves solely as an archive of the nostalgic summer romance aus written by warmau.

Check the MASTERLIST to find your read.

If a fic isn’t available, then the page owner hasn’t been able to find it. Updates are a bit slow.

DISCLAIMER: This page is not impersonating nor affiliated with warmau, and will be deleted or have its content removed upon the original author’s request.

[reallymisssummer]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au ten disclaimer | masterlist

not knowing what to say isn’t a foreign feeling to you, yet when you come face to face with ten outside his apartment on this summer morning, you are almost too petrified to even string a sentence together

he’s really just……..leaving

ten shines a big smile and from the open door you hear kun’s exasperated voice asking why in the world ten is packing up his entire existence for a program that’s going to last two months

“you look nervous” 

ten jokes first, running a hand through his dark hair which he’s spent the colder months growing out 

“im the one going to a different country and yet you look like you might turn green”

his laughter tickles you and you force yourself out of the weird, frozen feeling, for his sake

“im not nervous - it’s just this is our first summer apart since what, highschool?”

ten leans against the frame of his door and lets kun scuttle past him with a scowl 

yangyang and hendery bounce after him with ten’s insane amount of luggage

“yeah but it’s two months, not two decades. plus….you know how much ive always wanted to do this.”

right. and here you are being selfish.

“of course, i mean it’s literally the birthplace of ballet.”

“technically that’s italy, but france is a close second.”

“i hate you”

ten pulls you into his arms before you register that this is your goodbye hug

“i’ll miss you too.”

kun drives everyone to the airport, he complains and cries the most. 

sicheng gives you a knowing look when ten takes your wrist in his hand and tucks your arm between his.

you ignore the look, and focus on ten. on him. and then - when the switchboard pops up his flight info - he gives a bubbly and excited 

“ive gotta go!”

and then summer starts, just as he’s gone

“so when are you going to tell him you’re in love with him.”

sicheng brings the big gulp he stole from hendery up to his lips and you keep your eyes closed behind your sunglasses

“sorry, yukhei’s not my type.”

“you know im not talking about yukhei.”

you dig your fingers into the sand beside your towel, the beach is already so noisy so you pretend you don’t hear sicheng, but you still feel him looking.

you guess a part of it is true, you love ten. who doesn’t? 

is that the core of the issue then, that ten is so available and loveable and charming, that it makes him also unattainable? 

or at least, unattainable to you.

you hear your phone buzz inside your bag and sicheng is being dragged into the water by the rowdy rest of your friend group

it could be a text from ten?

your mind excites, but you put out that fire

it’s probably just spam.

ten does text and even video call the first two or so weeks while he’s away 

you get blurry photos of food at cafes and the eiffel tower, random fancy looking dogs being walked on the small, cramped streets

ten’s connection is kind of bad - but he still gleams through the fuzzy facetime camera as he shows you around the room the dance academy has provided 

pangs of his happiness and excitement seep into you

and then there’s the first sign of worry comes knocking and twirling through his door

a group of other dancers, all beautiful and strong, asking ten - from the limited amount of french you catch - if he’s done, they’re waiting for him to go to a show with them

ten gives you a scattered, quick goodbye. he says he’ll video call again. 

all you get is an update text almost five days later that has no pictures attached just a;

im ok - by the way i totally miss eating hot chips with you at midnight. ive had like a banana smoothie and that’s it.

sicheng and kun are the first to pick up on the shift, you are quietly withdrawing to yourself

nothing makes you laugh

ten doesn’t reply to your question about what the paris metro looks like, actually he doesn’t even read it

kun nearly tugs hendery’s ear red when he shares a snap story of ten pressed cheek to cheek with his new dancer friends in front of the louvre when you’re in the same room

the thing is you are not jealous of any of them. 

you don’t go around trying to find their facebooks, clicking on their instagram profiles, comparing you and them.

you are just sad to your bones that they will understand ten in such a way that no matter how long you two have been friends 

you will never, truly know

“you’re his best friend”

sicheng reasons on the phone as you stare up at the wall above your desk, littered in old pictures and clippings and your gaze catches on the ticket stub from ten’s first-ever solo dance performance

it had been a talent show in highschool. 

it had been the first time you saw ten perform outside the corner of his cramped bedroom or the glimpse you caught meeting up with him outside the dance academy

he’s in paris, he’s with people who love it so much more than i do - they love dancing like he loves dancing.

i cannot understand that.

“i think you were right sicheng.”

“im always right.”

i do love him. when am i going to tell him?

you hang up after sicheng has his i told you so moment and stare at your screen

a notification flashes across the screen and it’s a text from ten

the trains here are blue. i miss you.

you want to reply right away, so you open the message and start typing

i miss you too. actually, i think i finally understand why people who are in love are so hurt when they’re suddenly left without their other half and ten you are my o-

you delete the sentence and make a face

nice. i miss you too.

you don’t send it - or at least you forget to because your fingers are shaking and you exit out of the messaging app before checking

abandoning your phone, you turn on your side and stretch your hand out to reach the edge of the bed

there’s enough space between you and it for someone to fit, so you remember the countless times ten has laid there

smiling and laughing and tickling your face with his sleeping breath

you can’t even recall a conversation because there have been hundreds

suddenly you feel a warmth creep up your skin

hundreds of opportunities to tell him - and each time i chose to be a coward.

“you should write him a letter.”

“this isn’t a movie, what - you think im going to write a letter and he’ll jump on the first plane from france to come to my side?”

sicheng cocks an eyebrow as if to say it is a possibility

“no. im not writing a letter. i’ll suck it up and confess when he comes back.”

you somehow end up writing a letter.

maybe because you really do want to just send a long text spilling your mushy, soft, pink feelings 

but you know that’s just not what ten deserves 

he deserves (and you do too, but you won’t admit this) a face to face confession

so you start retelling the moments that flutter up in your heart whenever you think about him

how he makes the room brighter when he’s in it, how he dances with every bone, joint, muscle in his body - how he approaches it with no inhibition and true devotion that paints its way across his face when he practices, how he fits perfectly into the hole that grows more massive every day you don’t see him

standing there across the hall - coffee in hand, gym bag with his scuffed dance shoes 

by the time you’re finished - the letter is longer than you imagine. there are parts crossed and scribbled out, repetitive thoughts, and stupid little comments and metaphors that compare ten to flowers or clouds or anything else pretty in nature

you cringe at yourself, but you do feel better

it could be your outline for when the time to actually tell him comes.

you shove the papers into an envelope, write ten’s name and the address of his parisian dance academy just for the irony

and then make the mistake of letting it sit on your desk

in a matter of days, it has been swallowed by a bunch of other papers and trinkets 

and when you’re rushing around your room trying to get ready for another adventure to the beach - sicheng clinks the lollipop against his teeth and fishes it out - curious at the stamp

“do you want me to mail this?”

he asks and you’re trying to find those sunglasses you literally just bought and grumble that sure, whatever - you’ll meet him out by kun’s car.

halfway to the beach, you turn in horror from the passenger seat to look at sicheng in the back 

your eyes like saucers and a tremor in a voice

“wait. what did you ask me back in my room?”

sicheng’s big smile is red from the candy, “your letter to ten.”

and there comes the second pang of dread and worry that takes the overwhelming shape of your summer

oh my god - oh my god - maybe the letter won’t even make it. i mean it’s a letter to france….it’ll take at least a month to get there. wait - it probably didn’t even have a stamp on it. oh god maybe the address was totally off and some poor stranger is about to be subjected to my very incoherent feelings…..

every day you look at your phone and there’s no texts or emails or anything from ten

his social media has gone quiet too

you throw your dignity down a well and ask all your friends if they’ve heard from him and they all scratch their heads and say no, it’s been maybe a week since they did

your stress then turns from your love letter to a possibility that ten is in trouble

he kind of thrives from attention so it is very weird that he’s so off-grid

you decide finally, on the day that it’s been exactly a month and one day since he was gone, to call

you hover over the facetime button - should i text him first?

with a yelp, you nearly drop and crack your screen when ten’s name flashes across the screen

you settle your breathing and tell yourself he hasn’t gotten the letter, there’s no way - since when has snail mail been efficient?

you answer and are about to ask what’s up when ten waves something into the camera

“i got your letter.”

maybe you go into rigor. because ten’s eyebrows knit and he asks if your connection is ok, you aren’t saying anything

you don’t know if it’s just because you miss him so much that you’re able to drag yourself back into consciousness or because you are curious, in the depths of your mind, what his reaction will be

“o-oh. right- i-”

ten frowns and you think it’s coming. the rejection is coming.

“is that why you didn’t answer my text? you sent the letter instead?”

“your text?”

“yeah, i said i missed you and you read it and never responded.”

a peek of a smile stretches on his pretty, bare face

“i never thought you were so romantic to send a letter.”

something burns on your skin but you just try to make sure your hand holding the phone doesn’t shake

“im not - i just, it was dumb sicheng said i should write it because - i don’t know. he’s the romantic, blame him.”

“you’re the one that said i could make a shy tulip open its petals with my laughter.”

“oh god”

that smile turns into a grin

“and that my dancing manages to cast a spell on you.”

you hide your expression by turning your face

“are you going to re-read the whole thing to me?”

“should i, you’re so poetic.”

“don’t make fun of me.”

your voice is serious this time, small and huddled, because you mean it

worse than being told he doesn’t feel the same is to be ridiculed for holding him in your heart like this for so long

“im not making fun of you, the letter is beautiful.” 

you still can’t look at him, it’s so ten to be kind before he’s cruel

“i could never write something like that - so i thought i would just call you and say it.”

you don’t need to love song yourself into telling me you just see me as a friend

“i love you.”

your head whips back so fast your phone drops and you curse and ten can’t help but laugh

“sorry, sorry -what did you say?”

he runs a hand through his dark hair, the lighting in his room is dim and illuminates him perfectly

a large white t-shirt engulfs his slender shoulders as he sits up against the wall

“i love you. i know it’s corny to confess over facetime, but im guessing it’s more forgivable than text?”

a bubble bursts in your stomach and it makes you feel lightheaded and inhumanely blissful all at once

“i love you too.”

“more then friends right, because your letter had this part about kissing im very interested in.”

you bite back your lip and nod, both embarrassed that he’d bring that part up too but also seeing ten - your close friend, your secret love - talk about kissing you

makes some of the neurons in your body go haywire

“good, i seriously was scared you might have been pranking me with thi-”

“i would never. im not hendery.”

“oh how are they, ive been super busy with the practice for a review so i haven’t talked to anyone.”

another thing you love about him, he keeps everyone in. he leaves none of his friends behind. he pretends like he couldn’t have a care in the world, but he cares more than anyone else.

“he’s ok, he almost crashed kun’s car yesterday.”

ten shrugs, “expected.”

and like that - everything is still somehow the same. there is no awkward phase after you’ve talked about your feelings for each other at all.

because your love doesn’t come as a one hit punch because ten is beautiful, although he is to an unfair degree

it comes from the experience of being around him. having so much of him. maybe even getting a little addicted.

you do talk more on the phone, no more long pauses even though ten’s practices get more grueling and you tell him to take his time to rest

but he’s sweaty on the practice room floor - texting you - telling you everything is sore but the thought of seeing you soon makes it all better

it’s three days before ten is scheduled to fly back that he has his review and you are biting your fingernails waiting for him to tell you about it

when you get a youtube link at like three in the morning - you click it and someone has recorded ten’s performance

somehow, he looks more graceful than you’ve ever seen him

a new text comes in when it’s almost done

‘i think i did well - can i get a reward?’

'you’ll get a really good one when you’re home’

he sends a winking emoji and you can’t fall asleep after because you wonder what he’s expecting, you’d meant a kiss - had he meant more? 

you wouldn’t mind that at all.

xiaojun is being pulled away from the conveyer belt by kun and hendery is asking sicheng for a sip of his starbucks as you all wait for ten’s plane to land in the airport lobby

you two have not told anyone - mostly because you know there will be endless questions you won’t have answers too and sicheng might literally never let you live it down

so you wait for ten to be here so you can suffer together

you see the gates from his flight open and sicheng mutters that you look like you’re going to pop like a goddamn balloon

for once in your life, you don’t snide back at him, folding your hands in front of you and tippy-toeing to see over the crowd

and then, like seeing him for the first time all the years ago when you first met, ten comes out

hendery and xiaojun try to go for a running jump, but the older members hold them back because everyone can sense whats coming

you dash toward him and ten doesn’t stay still either - you two collide so hard it almost hurts, but you don’t care at all

ten’s duffel bag falls over his shoulder and your hands are wrapped around his neck before he can even say your name

it’s a first kiss that couldn’t be more characteristically fit for you

sweet, big smiles tasted on lips, and interrupted by none other than your group of friends gasping in a symphony of shock

except for sicheng - he knew

ten tastes like you imagine he would taste, maybe because in smaller ways you’ve already had doses of the sunshine that radiates off him before

he keeps his hands wrapped around your waist as he looks down into your eyes

“mon amour”

“is that really all you learned in france?”

“ummm yeah, i don’t know how to say let’s get out of here and back to my place even though im pretty sure someone said that to me at some point.”

you pout, “don’t try to make me jealous.”

“never!”

ten chuckles as you press your face into his neck and hug him close

the only way you get pulled apart is because someone (kun) reminds you all you’re still at the PUBLIC airport

the drive back is a frenzy and everyone wants to know everything and not about just you two - because you’re “two” now - but about france and traveling and ten’s dancing

like you’d sensed - nothing has really changed

just this time, your fingers are locked in tens. and the warmth you longed for in silence is suddenly all out in the open.

funnily enough, you and ten don’t ever write letters to each other again. 

ten just doesn’t like writing - it takes too much sitting down

and you are horrified everytime he fishes your love confession out of the memory box and dangles it above your head as leverage 

it’s how he convinced you into adopting the first cat. now you two have three.

so when you and him are deciding the best way to let all your friends know about your upcoming event you cross out mailed invitations

“we can make an email list.”

your legs are thrown over his thighs on the sofa and he’s resting the laptop on you them

“let’s just make an instagram post: wedding in our backyard on thursday - you’re invited.”

ten pinches his nose

“we are not having a backyard wedding. we could not fit everyone in my dance company into it anyway.”

you play with your engagement band and sigh

“fine, fine. what about…..we just call everyone and tell them. if we call kun right now he’ll let all of the world know by the end of the week.”

ten agrees with a hum, but then starts typing and you lean over to see

“bulk wedding invites? you’re giving in?”

he closes the laptop and tosses it to the side, easily and gently pushing you down onto your back to hover over you with a small content sound

“i am. but we don’t even have to write the letters - some company will do it for us.”

his lips are inches from yours and all of a sudden you’re young again - waiting to kiss him for the first time at that airport

“you know we’ll still have to write vows right.”

he is about to kiss you, he’s so close and your eyes are closing

“i’ll just read your letter outl-”

“TEN NO!”

he laughs, laughs until he finally does kiss you and then laughs again when he pulls back - the overflowing amount of love that exists in that moment is potent 

you tell him to get over that old thing, but he shakes his head

“never, when again in all the lives i live is someone going to say i could make a shy tulip open its petals with my laughter?”

original by warmau

masterlist

[reallymisssummer]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au kun disclaimer | masterlist

there’s a sharp knock on the glass of your window 

you stare up at the ceiling and don’t move an inch from the comfort of your bed until the knock comes again. and again.

with a groan you roll off your sheets and compose yourself before walking over and pushing your curtains aside

on the other side of the window is kun

standing god knows how on the side of the second story of your house and you cross your arms

he motions for you to open the window and you shake your head

he rolls his eyes and somehow the little gesture ticks you off to no end

who does he think he is? always being so rude, even when he needs me to do something for him!

he motions again and you try not to look at the strong line of his arms - he’s wearing a sleeveless tank and jeans which really? how athletic is he climbing in those thing-

you sneer but you give in, undoing the latch and pushing open the window

stepping back, kun climbs through without a hitch and once he’s standing on the carpet of your bedroom you look up and start

“i was about to go to sleep what are you doing her-”

“where’s your cousin?”

he doesn’t even look at you.

in fact, he looks over your shoulder at your door that’s closed

“he said to meet him before we both sneak out, but that dumbass could have just met me at the party himself.”

you uncross your arms and instead curl your fingers into fists at your side

“so why didn’t you sneak through the guestroom window asshole -”

“don’t know which window is the guest room. i just knew this one was yours because of the childish curtains.”

he gets under your nerves. he really does. he has since you meet him as the naïve new kid at your towns middle school

and he - he was the ever so perfect at everything upperclassman. 

that hadn’t changed much now - as you got older you came to understand that kun could do no wrong in the eyes of everyone BUT you

your parents thought he was the shining example of a young man, your friends all wanted to date him, and now even your cousin who was staying with you for the summer was impressed with him.

they’d met at the party you had thrown to welcome your cousin and how kun even got there - you don’t know - but he’d shown up with sicheng and ten 

and then was talking to your cousin and everyone and making you irritated the entire night ……. and yet ………… here he was now 

sneaking out with YOUR cousin to go to another party. who’s party? you didn’t know - your own damn cousin had invited KUN and not YOU

you don’t want to bite your tongue anymore - you want to start mouthing off on him just like he thinks he has the right to do with you 

but if you raise your voice, you’ll wake your parents and you have the sinking feeling that if they walked in on this scene 

they might not be as angry about it as other parents would be……you cringe, thinking about how your mother had once inquired you if kun and you were considering being more than friends.

you look up at him now. more than friends? he’s going to be my enemy till i die.

you think your worry comes to life when your door opens and you turn so fast in fear of seeing your parents actually standing there, but it is just your cousin

who grins at kun and pushes past you like you’re a ghost in your own room

“ready to go dude?” he asks and kun suddenly takes this moment of all to look at you 

he makes a noise of agreement, but he keeps his line of vision on you. it makes something crawl up your skin. creep, don’t look at me like that! 

it only lasts a split second, before both boys are using your window to sneak out into the sticky summer night and you’re rushing over to shut it. 

before you do - you watch them disappear out of the backyard - two figures in the moon. 

you huff, reaching for your curtains and you don’t notice kun look back.

this keeps happening. 

sometimes kun does come sneaking back through your window (he says he can’t get the guest room one where your cousin is - there’s nothing for him to climb up on that side of the house) but rather than just that

kun just keeps appearing around you

he’s at the same parties, he’s at the same park, he’s at the same beach. the town has never felt smaller and your cousin is the reason for it all. he drags kun everywhere - like they’re the bestest of friends.

they’ve known each other for like two or something weeks…..can’t they find other people to hangout with! maybe i should just stay in my room from now on-

you turn off the shower and try to erase the thought from your head. you wrap a towel around yourself and scurry down the hall back to your room where you shut the door and sigh.

he annoys me so much that my brain can’t help thinking about him when it should just be trying to throw him out of my he-

your shoulders tense when you hear a familiar sound at the window. 

no fucking way

the curtains are drawn back now and through the glass you see the familiar outline of kun’s figure

you stomp over - you’ve been boiling over his constant presence and you think fine, he wants to come into your room, you wont let him until he hears what you really think

so you yank the window up, but not enough for him to climb through

“hey i can-”

“kun, i know everyone thinks your gods gift to this earth but what would they think of you trying to sneak into my room through the goddamn window at midnight? huh? can’t spend your summer doing something better than bothering me? that’s what the prince of this little town does - peep through wind-”

in the heat of the moment you throw your hands up to the glass of the window and the towel ……. drops

you probably wouldn’t have even noticed - how wound up you’ve gotten - but kun 

kun nearly falls straight off the side of your house and you can see the panic reflected in his eyes flash so you yank the window up and instead of letting him fall backwards

you pull him in and ontop of you

the two of you topple over onto your carpet - the thudding sound resounds and kun catches himself on his arms so his weight doesn’t crush you

you stare up - that flash of panic is still in kun’s eyes and for a second you try to figure out why when you feel the summer air gust through and all over your exposed skin

you scream, because what else can you do, and kun pushes himself off you

you reach for the towel pooled beside you and wrap yourself back up - getting to your feet with wobbly horror and staring at kun who is sitting back with that expression stil on his face

it doesn’t last long though because you hear someone pull at your doorknob - your mothers voice coming from the otherside

kun falls back and rolls himself under your bedframe - just in time for the door to open and your mother to rush in with worry laced in her voice

“what happened?”

qian kun just saw me naked!

“i- i though-i thought i saw something in the window im fine, really!”

your mother pries but you push her back toward the door gently, assuring her that it was probably an owl or a racoon in a tree. really. 

she touches your shoulder and says to call her if you need anything. you close the door again and listen to her footsteps down the stairs.

you breath in and turn around - kun has gotten out from under the bed and is now standing at the corner of your bed looking more lost than you’ve ever seen him in your life

no snarky remarks, no stupid smug look on his face 

you feel angry. you still feel all pissed off from before, but now there’s something else coursing through you. 

shame.

“get out”

you grit your teeth. 

“i - i would never-”

“get out kun, seriously.”

he stumbles, no confidence and no superiority, just an almost wounded like stride as he reaches for the window again.

he looks over his shoulder and you brace yourself - with him, he could look sad all he wants but you know deep down he could say something so cruel right about now-

“im sorry.”

you clutch the towel 

sorry for what? for being better than me at everything? for having to see me at my most vulnerable when all i ever see you at is your best?

you think - or at least you assume you think this - you don’t realize you’ve said it out loud

kun stops and swallows, “im not the best at anything. im a horrible liar you know.”

“what?”

the towel should be soft, but it feels heavy, like a lifeline you’re gripping but that just gets harder and harder to keep close

kun pushes his lower body through the window and then looks at you one final time

“im a horrible liar. the reasons i even- the reason im always around you isn’t because of your cousin. it’s because i want to be near-”

you don’t hear the last word because he disappears right after that, you stand in the corner of your room, he wants to be near what? 

you look at the shut door, the mirror hanging on the back of it, and your reflection

did he say he wants to be near me?

you don’t really go anywhere for a couple of days after that. 

your cousin is always out, but you don’t even want to go see your friends. you just know that that will risk seeing-

something knocks against your window and you look over, a new feeling swelling in your chest that isn’t like that dread you’ve felt before

but instead of kun’s figure - you just see the raindrops that are accumulating on the glass

a heavy summer storm brews up outside and you think it’s ironic. your brain feels like it is going through a tornado of its own. 

you walk toward it and think it would be nice to feel the rain though - to touch something outside of your room and when you open it you do see something

you see someone in the backyard

“kun?”

you’re rushing out on the grass - barefoot and wrapping your arms around yourself in the wind of the rain

“kun why are you here - my cou-”

“im here to see you.”

you don’t understand - and then a strong chill that doesn’t come from the storm runs up your spine - he’s here to make fun of me isn’t he? mock me?

“listen, i don’t want to hear it from you of all people - you saw me naked for a second and you have no right-”

“its you. im always here to see you. do you understand?”

he’s talking over me - like usual - but why is his tone-

“excuse me? understand wh-”

the rain gets heavier and you cannot believe you’re about to do this but you’re getting soaked and so is kun and so you point to your window

“meet me up there.”

you don’t know why you invite him. you expect the worst and you expect to get hurt and made fun of it. but you do it anyway. 

part of you is saying it’s because you want to pick a fight - but another part, quieter and that’s been dormant for a while says no, it’s because you might think you hate kun but you aren’t going to let him stand out in the rain any longer.

you wish you could tell this part to shut up and go away, but you give into it every time. especially, it seems, when it comes to him of all people.

kun looks displaced again in your room - he usually sneaks through and acts like he owns the place - but this time he’s back to this awkward atmosphere

you feel sick thinking about how you kind of wish you had the other side of him back

“so why are you here kun, really. it’s embarrassing enough for me that you saw me-”

“im sick of lying.” 

you blink, looking at him more seriously

“lying?”

“your cousin is fun and all, but cmon - you said it yourself. everyone expects the best of me, why would i spend my summer partying around the town. do you think i like it?”

speechless you don’t say anything in response and kun continues

“it’s just, finally i had an excuse good enough to be around you. to sneak up through your window, to hangout with the people you are friends with, to see you. otherwise - i never get a chance to-”

he looks different tonight, maybe because he’s drenched with rain, but he looks more like the kun you’ve known for years

put together, serious, he even has his glasses on tonight which shocks you more than anything because ever since the summer started - ever since he’s been around your cousin - he seems to have ditched them

you think slowly the pieces are coming together in your head about what point kun is making

it creeps in and you think shock is going to overcome you when kun confesses - with none of that bravado he seems to have adapted - 

“i just know you hate me and without a good reason you would never let me near you so i - i just did the one thing that meant i could be close to you, because i dont hate you, i really like-”

you take a couple of steps toward him, closing your fingers around his face and you hear kun’s breath hitch up 

you pull him down and toward you and just as you’re about to brush your lips against his - you instead pull him into a tight hug

you bury your face in his chest. his hands stuck stiff at his sides

“im not going to kiss you until you promise me one thing kun”

you can feel his heartbeat and yours, both rushing - louder than the thunder outside

“wh-what?”

“if we do this - whatever this will be - you have to promise you’ll still hangout with my cousin. he really thinks you guys are best friends.”

after a bit of a pause you feel his chest rumble with laughter

which you take offense to as you pull out of his arms - “hey don’t laugh! im being seri-”

“this is why i want to be near you by the way.”

he looks at you and for the first time it isn’t cold or accompanied by a sneer, the warmth in the deep browns almost makes you coy

“the guy you’re enemies with tells you they like you and you go ‘whatever, just keep being nice to my cousin’.”

you cross your arms, “family before boyfriends.”

kun cocks an eyebrow, “boyfriend? you move fast.”

“qian kun you’ve seen me naked. you better be ready for commitment.”

he loops his hands around your waist and you yelp a little at the sound contact - hugging and all is one but now he is pushing you up and against him

“im ready for anything if it means i can see you naked again.”

after that - everything shifts

naturally it does, you do start dating the guy you swore you’d hate till you died but that’s not the only thing

you are also dating the most sought after guy in your town and while most of the other people your age go green with envy - your parents and cousin (surprisingly) are over the moon

your parents you get, but you thought your cousin would hate the idea - when in fact he confesses that he’s happy you like kun now - you all three can hangout easier for the rest of his summer here!

you’re all having dinner one time and your mother asks what made you finally realize you liked kun

you fluster, and kun quips that he just had to sneak through your window a couple of times to end up sneaking into your heart

your parents laugh - oh qian kun would never sneak through a window, only bad boys do that!

you almost choke on your peas

you won’t lie - you have insecurities and worries in the beginning, kun could still be pulling a fast one on you. or maybe you two just will never get over the competition between each other.

but that all proves null, you and him can be sarcastic and joke around all you want it doesn’t stop the feelings that grow tenfold through the summer 

that feeling that when you are with him, there isn’t anyone else around 

and kun really is the best at everything (you don’t say it out loud though)

but he does have the looks, the brains, the popularity and boy does he know what he’s doing with those hands of his 

safe to say that he might have seen you naked first but you definitely saw him as well

you joke about it and your cousin is like ok. nevermind. this relationship between yall is GROSS jkjk

and then - like all things, summer ends, and your cousin is back off to his hometown 

and when you’re saying goodbye - he goes up to you and leans in to whisper something so no one else hears

“that’s not going to happen!”

you exclaim when he leans out, but he just shrugs and says “just promise you will.”

so you do promise. 

when you comeback to join kun he asks what the promise was about and you roll your eyes, muttering that it’s unrealistic so it doesn’t matter.

the only issue is - it is very realistic

because ten years later you are sending out invitations to you and kun’s wedding

he’s sitting at the dinner table beside you and watching you handwrite the notes, cutely testing out your cursive 

he teases your mistakes and you swat at him, he leans down to kiss the side of your cheek when he looks at the invitation in your hand

it’s addressed to your cousin and kun reads it out loud: 

“hey cousin, im keeping my promise from the past - the promise that i'd invite you to me and kun’s wedding.”

kun looks at you and you can’t believe the look makes you blush - even as a damn adult

kun keeps reading;

“and the other promise - that i'll dance with you right after i dance with kun.”

kun chuckles, “you might not keep that one - because im not letting anyone else dance with after me. you’ll be mine that night.”

you scrunch up your nose, “dummy - ill be yours forever.” 

original by warmau

masterlist

[reallymisssummer]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au xiaojun

disclaimer | masterlist

“his birthday is literally a month away.”

kun says and you shrug your shoulders, bringing the straw of your milkshake to your lips

“you’re the one who taught me it’s always good to plan in advance.”

“you don’t need a month to plan a birthday party, plus its xiaojun - not ten - who would probably insist on a whole gala.”

ten throws a look across the table but doesn’t dispute this fact

you tap your fingers on your drink and set it down to mumble something about how fine, you’ll do it yourself if they don’t want to help

it takes two seconds for kun to give an exasperated sigh after that and agree to help you after all 

you smile and tell him you knew he would, he’s too much of a micromanager to refuse

ten laughs and sicheng smirks as he doesn’t look up from his phone

kun gives you the same look ten gave him a minute ago

you’ve been friends with xiaojun for a good year now 

ever since he nearly lost bella when she got off her leash at the local park and you bolted after her like any good citizen would before she could wander off into the street

xiaojun and you have gotten closer

you kind of get him in a way that not a lot of people do

his humor can be kind of dry, and he tends to be picky about certain things

you’re exactly the same way so you never really get mad about it - you both have come to learn the things you dislike and like about literally everything 

being friends with someone who is as particular about movie popcorn and indoor room temperatures is a blessing more than people might think

the other members see the similarities between you two and more often than not they’re happy that xiaojun, who can also be kind of reserved around strangers, has found someone that makes him so comfortable 

everyone in their apartment is a character from hendery to yangyang but xiaojun meshes best with you

so it’s kind of no surprise that even after a short time of being friends, and most of that time spent around the others

you two start getting the off-handed “you’re so alike, why don’t you just date?” comments

hendery is the first person to say it after you guys spend hours playing video games together

you and xiaojun are so in sync about everything that the rest of the team feels like you guys have to be playing together when in reality you’re not even in the same room

the immediate response is for you to cackle into your headset microphone and for xiaojun to let out a high-pitched, almost theatrical ‘never!’

it passes over your heads and nothing changes

but then everyone seems to be saying it 

“only you two can put up with each other.”

“have you ever considered being more than friends?”

“oh you’re 'hanging out’ again or are you just actually going on a 'date’?”

the words are supposed to carry absolutely no weight

but at some point when someone says something you end up looking at xiaojun out of the corner of your eye for some kind of response that isn’t just a staunch and straightforward

“never!”

it somehow also manages to get worse the month you’re planning for his party in secret, both the teasing questions and your weird hope that xiaojun will one day say something different

nearly everyone knows you’re trying to put this thing together but him and maybe that’s why they tease

or maybe it’s because xiaojun only ever seems fully himself when you’re beside him

the way the tension in his shoulders falls completely to pieces when you topple over to spread out like a starfish on his sheets 

the way the look of complete boredom on his features shift around and up into a smile when you open the door holding your favorite cold drinks from the bubble tea place next door

the way xiaojun has never let someone close to him like this before - the way he lets you get close. 

doesn’t flinch when you lean over to brush an eyelash from his cheek, seems totally content with having you put a hand on his knee when you’re all seated around the table and arguing over who goes next in this game of monopoly 

it’s a couple of days till the party and you are standing in the parking lot of the apartment building xiaojun lives in, you both have run away from the noise of his roommates

“hey, what do you want for your birthday?”

you feel hot when you ask - and it’s not just because of the summer weather 

xiaojun’s head tilts as he says he hasn’t thought about it

“actually, i’d love it if everyone got off our backs with his 'dating’ crap.”

dating crap

“do you hate it that much?”

“it just feels like they’re taking it too seriously.”

you run your tongue over your teeth and the unusual pause makes xiaojun narrow his eyes, in the evening darkness you think maybe he won’t notice the confusing expression on your face but he does 

“did i say something wrong?”

it’s almost like he’s poking at the sleeping giant question that you both are too nervous to actually ask - do we like each other in a way that’s more than just friends? is everyone just pointing out the obvious?

“no, i just got lost in my thoughts for a second.”

your mouth feels dry when xiaojun looks like he’s going to step closer to you but doesn’t

your saving grace is hendery’s head popping out over the balcony and yelling for you two to get back inside before the mosquitos eat you alive

xiaojun holds the door open, but you tell him you need to go home early

that night you look at your checklist of things to do for his birthday

you’ve already sent out invites, you put in the order for the cake, and you got all the decorations

two things are left, pick up cake and snacks and get present 

“dating crap”

you say out loud to yourself and for some reason, it hurts in your chest. you decide you’ll just get xiaojun some kind of giftcard, maybe so he can buy more games.

“dude, xiaojun is like a cat.”

kun says and you try to balance the cake in your hands as you two make your way to his car

it’s the day of the party, kun is lugging bags of snacks and you’re thankful that the cake has xiaojun’s name on it spelled correctly, but something doesn’t feel celebratory about all this

the excitement of making xiaojun happy has turned to anxiety ever since your talk in the parking lot

dating crap, dating crap, dating crap - did i say something wrong?

you squeeze the thought from your mind and look at kun with your brows furrowed

“what?”

“he’s like a cat ok, he’ll never show how much he wants something until he gets it.”

it’s cryptic and you tell kun you don’t know what he’s talking about, the cake is cold even through the bag it’s in as you place it on your lap in the passenger seat

kun sighs as if he knows you’re just being difficult 

“sure, anyway xiaojun will be back to the apartment at seven so we should have enough time to set everything up.”

at a red light, just as you’re deep in mixing thoughts about xiaojun and your feelings and his feelings and how you sometimes get embarrassed seeing him walk around shirtless or eating from the same plate as him

kun goes, “by the way what did you get him as a present?

"oh a giftcard for games.”

kun taps his finger against the wheel

xiaojun is actually surprised when he walks through the door and you all jump up with balloons and cheers and brightly colored party hats

he immediately looks at you in the crowd and asks

“you did this all for me?”

your heart threatens to jump up and out of your chest because he should look normal like he always does 

but he’s standing there with his grey t-shirt and silver chain looking like a sculpted masterpiece bestowed on you from heaven itself 

god, i have it bad.

“we did it together!”

“nah it was like all them!” 

hendery counters your modesty before throwing his arms around xiaojun into a half tackle hug

the party is like … any other party

kun was kind of right, you didn’t need to take a whole month to plan, but you’re glad it is all going smoothly

people are enjoying the food, people are playing the usual games and chitchatting and summer is wafting in from the open balcony door

the pets are scampering around from lap to lap and someone has put on music that’s upbeat but not ear piercing or distracting

xiaojun is being passed around for presents and hugs and congratulations for another year of his life

and you are in the kitchen constantly putting new bowls of chips out, busying yourself with your hands to fight this weird churn of your stomach 

xiaojun looks so handsome i could be sick. i want all of his attention but that’s such a horrible thing to think - this is his party, this is literally. his. party.

someone taps your shoulder and you half expect it to be another person asking where the dip is when you turn to see xiaojun

“thank you so much”

his voice is softer than usual

“oh don’t thank me, it’s your birthday, it’s the least i could do.”

“i guess when i said i don’t want a present you went with a party which is so sweet and unexpected.”

the compliment goes over your head because the mention of that conversation has you thinking about it again.

dating crap. did i say something wrong - you feel cold in an apartment of packed bodies - it’s like he was saying i don’t like you like that. i don’t love you.

“a-ah, yeah. i did also get you a present.”

you fish the gift card that was put in a pretty envelope by the employee out of your pocket and hand it to him shyly

“i know it’s not much-”

“no, you know me so well. you know i wanted to get all those new skins and stuff.”

he’s gripping the cup of soda in his hand unusually tight, you try not to notice the way it makes the veins that run up his forearm stand out

“xiaojun!”

someone’s attention is needed and he disappears with a little smile. the conversation feels so stoic. it doesn’t feel the way you and him talk.

and then somehow you end up in a circle on the floor with bella in your lap playing truth or dare 

it’s a birthday party in a huge apartment, so it’s bound to reflect some of the traditions of high school 

also hendery got too excited about playing it and no one wanted to say no 

everyone starts off the way these things always go, embarrassing borderline comedic dares. stupid truth questions so that roommates can out other roommates for their mistakes. 

you laugh a lot, you notice xiaojun keeps looking at you 

then it gets to the birthday boy himself and hendery’s big white grin kind of scares you

“so xiaojun, truth or dare?”

“truth”

a loud ringing of 'oooh’s’ plays through the walls and you swallow

“is it true……….you aren’t romantically interested in your best friend?”

all eyes turn to you and then xiaojun

bella whimpers in your lap like she’s sentenced the shift, she hops out and stretches before finding a corner somewhere else - you wish you could find a corner somewhere too.

xiaojun’s face is unreadable, you haven’t touched any alcohol all night but your vision feels fuzzy

“no. we’re just super close friends.”

the smile on hendery’s face falls and the crescendo of your heartbreaking thumps through your ears so much that it physically hurts

someone coughs and clears their throat

you don’t even register what you’re doing as you’re doing it, don’t hear xiaojun say your name or the hard thwack of kun’s hand on the back of xiaojun’s shoulder

“are you insane, why would you say that when you don’t mean it?”

the question floats from someone’s mouth and it’s not yours and you don’t stick around to hear xiaojun’s answer 

you only navigate yourself up to your feet and out of that apartment because your body puts autopilot into flight mode

you’re maybe two blocks down the street when something warm wraps its arms around you 

you don’t move - your eyes are fixated on the asphalt 

“im so stupid, im sorry.”

xiaojun’s voice breaks in a way you’ve never heard before

“you’re not stupid for not liking me back.”

your voice sounds flat in a way you’ve never heard before too

the arms around you drop and you start to move forward again, still wanting to get away from him and everyone else

“no. i mean im stupid for lying.”

you stop

“i thought you didn’t want me to be interested in you like that and then kun said that’s the dumbest thing he’s ever heard because you obviously-”

xiaojun can’t say the rest of the sentence because he’s waiting for you to confirm

kun is always right about so many things, when he’d said xiaojun is like a cat, you get this is what he meant

“that i obviously am in love with you?”

you hear the sigh escape from xiaojun before you turn full around

when you do xiaojun nods, opens his arms again and you have never felt more fit for a place than when you tuck yourself into his chest and he buries his nose into your hair

“you’re so bad at truth or dare”

you muffle into his shirt and he laughs, squeezing you closer

you don’t mind the way you stick to each other under the glaring heat of the last summer month’s hold

of course you come back to the apartment and everyone looks like they’ve just been saved from drowning in the titanic 

the birthday party goes to a congrats-on-finally-confessing-your-feelings-you-two-idiots party 

and for all the time you two spent apart that evening, you’re now glued to xiaojun’s side and it finally is in a way that lets your fingers brush and hold onto each other

in a way that lets him turn his head to kiss your temple when he’s had enough of the conversation or argument his other roommates are in

you refuse to let him clean when the party is over - he is the birthday boy - but he does it anyway

you get some alone time on the balcony again and you kiss some more, all shy and new and tender

but xiaojun’s hand finds your hip and you stammer against his mouth 

you want to stay over but literally everyone is home so you peck xiaojun on the lips and he mutters we could just cuddle instead when you say goodbye at the door 

the rest of august is sweeter than summer ice cream

you and xiaojun go on dates, which xiaojun is actually good at planning because he just knows you so well and he knows you are not the type of person who wants to go to fancy, uptight restaurant or even entertains the idea of seeing sappy romance movies in theaters

he knows what to order for you two before you even come over

you know what he needs when he just offhandedly mentions that he needs to get some stuff from the store

and it’s like you two are connected by something more than just a physical need for the other, it’s like your souls have been intertwined and your minds too

you do finally get to come over when the rest of the members are out practicing or hanging out with other people

and you check the door to the room is locked about six times before xiaojun has to rope you into his arms with his pretty lips

before scuttling out from under the covers to check the lock himself too

it makes you laugh, he laughs too, you two kiss and you think you can only remember xiaojun’s taste for hours after

no one, not even strangers, seem surprised by you being together as they learn it

an older woman at the beach says you and him just look like puzzle pieces that have found each other, she says she sees happiness in your futures

and it is all happiness - from that birthday to this one - almost ten years later

xiaojun knows you’re planning a party, you always do like it’s a tradition, so you can’t call it a surprise anymore

but he promises to act shocked when he comes through the door anyway

“is this shocked face good enough?”

he asks, putting his hands on his cheeks and opening his mouth

age has treated him so well, he’s still got the absolute best cheekbones you’ve ever seen in your life

you giggle and clamber over onto the sofa where he is 

“no, no - more oomf!”

he tries again and then reaches out to pull you into him, you kiss his nose and he scrunches it up

“how about i just jump up and go 'no way!’ or something?”

“xiaojun you’re not twenty anymore.”

he pouts, “fine. i'll think of something.”

“by the way what do you want as a present?”

you look into his eyes and the browns soften as they reflect the image of you, the person he’s sworn to love for the rest of his life

he shrugs - says he got the best present of all time already

“you said that last ye-”

“and it’s true, you’re the only thing ive ever wanted so badly i was just too dumb of a guy to ask for it.”

your hands are warm on his chest

“that’s ok, you still got it in the end.”

original by warmau

masterlist

[reallymisssummer]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au hendery disclaimer | masterlist

“the air conditioner is broken in my apartment.”

you cross your arms and jut your hip out with an amused gaze

“uhuh and the world is ending on thursday. what do you really want hendery?

he wipes the back of his neck and shoves his palm into your face with the evidence that he’s been sweating for hours

you pull back just in time with a face

"im serious, my place feels like the pits of hells.”

“i think that’s fitting.”

you don’t uncross your arms and hendery groans

“c'mon, please just let me in for an hour of relief.”

hendery looks unbearably long

taking up most of your carpet and then some as he lays starfish in your cool living room

you had been watching something on your tv, absentmindedly wasting your weekend away when he’d come ringing on your doorbell

technically, you aren’t “enemies” or anything - you’ve been neighbors for well over half a year

it’s just something about him irks you. 

maybe it’s the way he has one of those obnoxious doormats that doesn’t stick to the ground so if you aren’t looking and step on it - you’ll go sliding down the hall like you’re on ice

or the fact that you noticed he doesn’t properly know the difference between fabric softener and detergent so he just pours them into the machine when he’s in the laundry room with you

actually, you grind your teeth yourself, it’s none of those - it’s the fact that he thinks he’s entitled to everyone else’s hospitality and never gives any of his ow-

“can you throw me a pillow?”

he outstretches his toned arm and you ignore the way his muscles flex as you chuck one off your sofa at him with the intent to hurt

but he catches it effortlessly and without anything close to a thanks

he’s a brat. that’s why we don’t get along.

“can i change the channel?”

“no.”

“you aren’t even watching the tv.”

“and this isn’t even your house.”

hendery rolls over onto his back and gives you a glistening white smile that you’re both envious and pissed off at.

“hey, why do you hate me so much - could it be that you secretly want all of thi-”

he runs his hand down the line of his body and that’s the straw on the camel’s back for you 

“get out.”

“oh come o-”

the door shuts with a heavy, cruel thud and you are left in peace again.

you stare at the pillow on your carpet and walk up and down the spot where you can still feel the heat from his body.

what a weirdo. well at least he won’t bother me again.

you’re in the shower the next time someone rings on your doorbell. 

you half expect it to be the deliveryman so you peek your head around the curtain to yell out that they can leave the package at the door but all you get in response is another doorbell ring

you huff and grab a towel, wrap it around yourself and trek out with slippery footprints left in trail as you get to the door

“who is it?”

the doorbell rings again

maybe it’s the building manager? only she’s such a hardass about things and wouldn’t just give up after the first ring.

you sigh and unlock the door to open it - fully sure now that it’s the manager - when all you see in front of you is

hendery

he looks you up and down and you stare back in horror

seemingly unaffected by your appearance he points over his back

“our air conditioners still busted is it ok if-”

“NO!”

you shut the door again and hear hendery yelp in surprise, then add “you could have crushed my fingers!” for good measure

you stand there and grit your teeth - glaring at the door as if you’re glaring at him

“hendery. im not letting you in here anymore!”

“but whhhhhhhy - it’s so hot, it’s like one hundred degrees out and kun can’t fix the damn thing so im dying pleaseeeeeeee spare some mercy!”

you harden in your resolve

“no! if you want free AC, go stick your head in the freezer section of the grocery store!”

you think you hear his footsteps shuffle away and the tension releases in your shoulders

you head back into the shower and stand under the water as you try and figure out what exactly made you this mad this time

obviously, it was because he’s coming here to annoy me.

the angel on your shoulder quips

but the demon on your other shakes its head

aren’t you mad he wasn’t all flustered seeing you like this?

the self-conversation is bizarre, and you shut off the water to stop it

when you dry off you decide that the summer heat is getting to you, what does it matter to me what hendery thinks? 

you need to go get some ice cream and regain your dignity

you’re humming to yourself, trying to decide between a tub of plain vanilla or the box of mango popsicles 

when you hear the door to the freezer beside you open

at first you don’t look up, but then you hear a loud sigh and you peek from the corner of your eye just for your gaze to fall on the one person you really - really - do not want to see right now

“hendery. what are you doing?”

he moves aside a carton of cool whip to rest his head on the shelf inside

“i’m doing what you told me to do. sticking my head into a freezer.”

you look around to see if any employees are milling about 

and if they are, you fully intend on abandoning this conversation so no one incorrectly thinks you and hendery have anything to do with each other

but don’t you?

an evil voice in your head suddenly chimes

look at him - doing exactly what you said. isn’t that kind of …….. cute?

you are so dumbfounded by your own inner dialogue that you scoff and hendery raises an eyebrow

“why are you scoffing, first i can’t use the ac in your place and now i can’t even do this? you’re the one-”

you grab the carton of vanilla and let the freezer door shut hard enough to shake the others beside it

hendery pops his head and squints his eyes

“you can do whatever you want hendery.”

“does that me-”

you extend your hand and point directly between his eyes

“let me rephrase that: you can do whatever you want, hendery, as long as it is not in my presence.”

you are half way to the cash register when you suddenly stop

you look over your shoulder, and a part of you seriously expects to see him there again

pouting and whining and annoying you again

but hendery is nowhere to be seen and you pretend the weird drop in your stomach is from the mean look a random lady throws your way for blocking her path to the produce 

hendery doesn’t show up for the next couple of days

you say you notice it only because you’re enjoying the fact that he took your last warning to heart

but in reality, as the vanilla carton of ice cream you bought empties little by little, you realize you’re just searching for him for another reason

one you don’t think you want to confront yet

then one day, when you’re sitting beside the window and eating the last of your ice cream you see him

he’s sitting in the little park across the street, right under the water fountain, and a group of kids are circling around him 

they’re all counting and laughing and the sound makes it up into your ears

hendery suddenly jumps up, shaking the water for him hair and starts chasing one of the kids 

they run all around the park and hendery purposely slows down so that he can’t catch them

you roll your eyes, what’s he doing playing with kids at his age?

and then the kid he was chasing falls, scrapping hands and knees on the hard ground

hendery immediately hovers over, your spoon stays in your mouth as you watch him scoop the little body up into his hands and rush over to where you presume the kids mother or aunt or older sister is

the other children form a curious circle, the ice cream starts to melt down the side of your spoon as you concentrate on the way the one who fell is still clinging onto hendery’s sleeve as their wounds are bandaged up

hendery looks up for a brief second and you back away from the windowsill on instinct

the carton of ice cream drops down beside you

it happens again, this unexpected view of hendery from a distance

you’re coming home from a meeting with a friend and he’s across the street at the bus stop

at first you just look to make sure it’s him, but that posture and grin as he stares down at his phone is a dead giveaway to his identity

so you tell yourself to just keeping going - out of fear that you’ll somehow make eye contact

then, you see him suddenly bend down

at his feet is a local stray, she rubs up against his bare legs and hendery scratches behind her ear 

if you remember correctly, that same stray has never liked you, hissing even when you had tried to put out a saucer of tuna

so you stop walking and watch as it nearly splays down over his feet and hendery laughs and tickles it 

and you hate to say it but you think he looks almost……...cute.

the bus comes puffing down the hill though and hendery picks the cat up carefully and sets it safely in the nearby bushes of another building

before he can turn around in time to see you, the bus blocks both your views

you hurry along and try to distract yourself with the thoughts of what you’ll have for dinner

summer is at its worst when you wake up and check to see that the temperature is forecasted to be 99 degrees

you turn the ac on and sit down to think of what you can do in such horrible weather

when you lean down to press your forehead to the cool surface of your table you think

should i let hendery in, is his ac still broken?

you jolt at the thought. 

recently, you’ve been thinking about hendery a lot. way more than you ever have before.

you’d been watching some b-listed romcom the night before and when the lead had fell on his butt trying to impress the girl of his dreams you’d akin it to something he would do

it was downright unsettling 

the sun has cursed you - you reckon - that’s what it is 

ever since you met him you knew you two wouldn’t get along, yet here you are sprouting up the thought of actually inviting him over if his ac really still is broken

you groan

no, it’s not because you care about hendery or have suddenly grown feelings for him. you’re just a concerned neighbor. plus hendery lives with kun and you………like kun well enough.

it’s enough of an excuse that gets you up and down the hall, knocking on the door 

hendery doesn’t answer, but kun does - and so does a gust of strong, cool air

“oh. you fixed your ac.”

you say before you can think and kun raises an eyebrow

“fixed? it was never broken.”

“oh.”

you blink up and into kun’s confused expression

before either of you can follow up with a question in the awkward, tension-filled silence

hendery appears behind kun with his bedhead and no shirt. he doesn’t see you as he rubs the sleep from his eyes and asks if kun can make him an omelet

you wave without a word and rush back to your own apartment before hendery has the time to notice

you hear kun say something about how hendery needs to learn how to crack eggs himself before the door shuts

your heart is beating ever so erratically in your chest. at the kind of speed that you would deem humiliating.

but, if the ac was never broken then why was hendery always bothering me about it?

the devil pops back up onto your shoulder with a grin big and red like candy

maybe, he just wanted an excuse to be around you.

you spend the rest of the day debating this.

first off, hendery did seem like the type that would annoy his crush in highschool with weird nicknames or notes passed around during class

that is in highschool  - you’re both adults now. there was no way he would still be doing the same thing

then again, this was hendery you were talking about, whose common language and overall vibe seemed to work best with children and animals

you try to convince yourself that that’s exactly the issue

why am i suddenly liking a guy who acts like …. that?

by “that” you had meant childish and weird - but maybe “that” was slowly turning into kind, fun, and really easy to love

the thoughts clog up your brain, mixed with the miserable heat, you just give up and go to bed early

you hope you wake up with a clarity of mind

instead, you wake up to a note slipped under your door

you pick it up and know who it is from immediately.

guess he really isn’t above highschool level flirting afterall?

you read it and it says that hendery wants to meet you in front of the freezer you two talked at last

half of you says you need to keep face and just not go. 

the other half is sick and tired of being single.

hendery is wearing basketball shorts and a plain grey hoodie when you show up

“a lot of layers for someone who said their air conditioner is broken.”

is your opener and hendery turns to you, first smiling and then letting his face fall into a serious expression

it’s the first time you’ve ever seen his eyes not twinkle with some form of mischief

“yeah - i - kun told me you stopped by.”

now you feel your own playfulness wear off and while clearing your throat you wait for him to continue

“i’m sorry about lying. and im sorry about always being a nuisance to you.”

you wait two beats and hendery stays quiet

“anything else?”

you can tell he doesn’t really know what you mean by the question, you know he’s racking his brain for the ‘right’ answer

“i mean - um………i’m sorry for being….um……..rude?”

he tries and in response, you can only jut out your hip and roll your eyes

by that, hendery can tell that he hasn’t said what you’re wanting to hear so he tries again

“i’m sorry for acting like a chi-”

“hendery.”

he straightens up and stares into your eyes with concentration

“why did you lie in the first place? that’s what i want to hear. what was the reason.”

again, you can tell the cogs in his head are turning, and you start to second guess yourself

maybe he didn’t just do it because he wanted to be around me - maybe he really just wanted to annoy someone? was he just…..

“kun said i should apologize, i shouldn’t bother people just because i’m bored.”

……..bored

you think you hear something break, maybe a glass bottle in another aisle over

but the ringing sound in your ears is actually just the fragments of your own heart

“right. you were just bored.”

you repeat and a shadow casts itself over your face. hendery reads the switch fast and reaches out to touch your shoulder

you shake it off and turn to leave, as there isn’t much else you can say

this time you don’t look back to see if he’s following you. you don’t think twice about the time you’ve spent changing your opinion on him and you decide that afterall, you knew that you and hendery just would never get along. in any kind of way.

“i’m sorry.”

his voice comes from over your shoulder before you can push your way out of the exit door of the grocery store

“kun also said i shouldn’t lie. i was bothering you because i like you. i was acting like a five year old with a crush because that’s the only way i’ve ever been with the people i like. i know it’s dumb and i know i really made you mad so i- i’m sorry.”

before you can turn, hendery tries to move past you and run away first

you catch him by the back of his hoodie and he freezes up when you tug him back toward you

“i’ll do anything ok, seriously, i’m sorry i will try my best to stop liking you because i know it’s a burden please i-”

he’s rambling and rambling and you two are blocking the way for people to get out of the store

so wordlessly and with more force than you mean to, slam your arms around him from behind

you bury your head into the fabric 

“you talk so much. i think i like you too.”

if you weren’t hugging him, you might have been able to see the physical joy that spreads over hendery’s face

it lights up every part of his features and he scrambles to turn in you hold to hug you back

he leans in, eager and overflowing to try and kiss you, but you put a hand up against his mouth

“we’re still in the store.”

he nods, saying something muffled and you push him toward the exit. someone scuttles past you and mutters something about how you both are being so annoying right now

when you finally get back to your place, you tell hendery that he can try again - with the kiss of course - but this time you want a genuine try and not some kind of messy puppy slobber which is what you imagine he had in mind

hendery feigns offence, but when he takes your face in his hands, he’s gentle and you’re thankful that his mouth tastes like fresh mint

“did you plan for this to happen?” 

you joke later as you two cuddle against each other with your ac on blast

“of course. i knew you’d fall for my charms one day.”

you playfully pinch him and hendery cries out like it seriously hurts 

you laugh, the two of you laugh together, but you can’t say he’s wrong

at the end of the day - somehow - you did end up falling for some kind of charm

and that charm stays with hendery, even as you two grow older together 

and being neighbors turns to dating turns to living together 

and the one summer where your shared air conditioner actually breaks and you two find yourself standing in the freezer section with the doors open

trying to take in as much free cold air as possible

you look at hendery’s reflection in the glass with a big smile

“babe, you were so smart back then. this is way better than an ac.”

he chuckles at his own corny joke before you can

you want to quip back, but in the moment all you can do is see young hendery in front of you

sticking his head in between cool whip and ice cream just because you told him to

“hey - i love you.”

you blurt out, even though you’ve said it way too many times before

hendery smiles, says “i love you too” 

and draws a heart in the condensation on the door

you grin and then under it hendery adds word that makes your eyes go wide

“forever?” 

original by warmau

masterlist

[reallymisssummer]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au yangyang

disclaimer | masterlist

the door opens as soon as the hand on the clock that hangs right above the line of freezers at the back of the store strikes eight

through it walks yangyang

grey hoodie pulled over his messy hair, stuck to the skin of his forehead with slowly evaporating sweat

he’s dribbling a basketball as he walks down the aisles and you pretend to rearrange the candy display in front of the register

but you’re watching

the sound of the basketball thumps through the otherwise empty corner store

outside, the sun is waving its last goodbye before the moon takes it spot in the sky

and then yangyang rounds his way back to you - placing some loose change down and waving the already unwrapped melon pop he’s picked out

you count the coins, and he’s ten cents short, but you don’t say anything about that

he turns, basketball now tucked under his arm

and leaves without a thank you or a goodbye

you know him - and you’re sure he knows you too - but it has been the same silent routine since summer started two weeks ago

the reason - and it could just be your suspicion - but no other fact has reared its head as creditable

has to do with dong sicheng

yangyang’s upperclassman, friend, and your ex-boyfriend

you lean forward a little and huff, not even really my ex-boyfriend. we fooled around all of last semester and then-

you feel something weird curl up inside your stomach

sicheng had called it off

you remember what he had said to you;

“maybe if you weren’t always looking at -”

the door opens again and your eyes barely shift to see who it is now

only to see yangyang again, melon pop abandoned, grey hoodie abandoned, basketball abandoned

he buffers a bit before walking right up to the register

you straighten up and feel like the little store has only gotten tighter

he slaps the ten cents he was short down on the counter and you blink

“i owe you this.”

“oh thanks.”

“sicheng isn’t here for the summer. he went abroad.”

you blink, and your instinct is to say - why would i care? - but you just nod slowly

yangyang steps back a little. he’s still got remnants of sweat on him from the summer heat, his hands tucked deep in his pockets

“did you like him?”

“no”

you answer a little too fast for comfort, but there just isn’t enough time to stop yourself from spilling the truth. something you’ve wanted to say for a while.

yangyang is looking at the floor, or maybe the candy, who knows - but he looks up after that.

“he said you were always -”

“looking at you. i know.”

yangyang seems to catch his breath, or maybe he just looks like he’s being suffocated, but either way he points to the sign on the door

“you close in an hour right?”

“yes”

“ill be here. we can - ill be waiting for you.”

even with the streetlights flickering, the night hovering into complete darkness, the heat makes everything feel vibrant and hot

or maybe you just feel all this pressure, finally being alone with yangyang

you’ve changed, you’ve attempted to comb your hair, you’re holding the half finished bottle of gatorade that is acting like some kind of pseudo-anchor as you wait to hear what it is yangyang will say

does he know? did he notice? or did sicheng just tell him for the hell of it that ive always actually liked him?

“i was looking too, that’s why i was so confused.”

he kicks the curb a little and avoids your gaze

“why you chose him - why you were sneaking around and doing all of that with him when i was-”

he throws his hands up in frustration

“when i was there too!”

“i just didn’t think you felt the same way.”

“you think i didnt like you back?”

you cross your hands and nod

“yeah, you never did anything to make me think you -”

“neither did you, you actually did the opposite, hooking up with one of my closest friends-”

“hey!”

you don’t want to raise your voice, but it makes yangyang look at you. really look at you.

“is it a crime to want to be desired? i couldnt get the feeling from you and sicheng just kissed me one day and it felt-”

yangyang steps closer, both hands reaching for your shoulders as if he’s about to pull you in close to him

but just as his fingers graze your skin, you can feel the tension stiffen him into stone

you flatline your voice and stare, “yangyang if you’re going to kiss me then just do it”

he opens his mouth in protest, at least that’s what he intentions, when in the next second

it’s you, dropping the gatorade in your hand, and just tugging him in for it first

he doesn’t kiss with the overwhelming confidence he can saunter around with when he’s with his friends, but he is enthusiastic

it kind of shocks you when after just a soft peck on the lips turns into yangyang wrapping you in almost squeezing hug

he kisses as if he’s trying to make up for something

you chalk it up to the time you’ve both wasted tip-toeing around each others feelings

and when you pull away from him, you realize he’s nearly dragged you off the curb and into the sidewalk with him and you’re like

“let’s get out of the street before we get hit by a car.”

he grins, the brightest light even in the darkness

“wait- just one thing though.”

his hands don’t let go from being wrapped around your waist, his bare skin sticking to the fabric of your shirt. how many degrees is it out? at least eighty something.

“what?”

“do i kiss better than sicheng-”

you yank him back onto the sidewalk and roll your eyes in response, yangyang just leans down to laugh into your neck

you’ve still got to work at the shop all summer, but now yangyang doesn’t just stop by at just eight

he’s there as much as possible

sitting on boxes of soda and chips - hand on your leg as you two watch the array of interesting neighbors and customers that pass their way through

there’s a nice old couple that beams at you and yangyang, talking about how much you two remind them of themselves

there’s a social recluse that scurries up and down the aisles even though he always buys the same two things every time he’s in here. yangyang theorizes he’s a spy or something and you’re like im pretty sure he works for an IT company

there are giggling groups of middle schoolers enjoying the summer, there are teenagers who spend more time kissing in the corners rather than buying anything, there are adults rushing to and from work

sometimes yangyang’s friends stop by, the ones he plays basketball with, and they wolf whistle and wink and push him when they think you’re not looking

but not kun - who apologizes to you every time for their CHILDISH behavior

the summer that you thought would be dragging slowly because of this dumb job, has become something like a rainbow.

colorful, eventful, and beautiful

especially when you’re sitting up on the register counter and yangyang is leaning up to kiss you

lips cold from the ice-cream you both just shared

he’s gotten better at kissing, and at hand-holding, and staring at you like you’re the entire earth and more

he leaves for a couple of hours to go play basketball - and one evening you close the shop early to go watch him

he looks so different from the yangyang that makes bad jokes, the yangyang who chases the local stray cat around your store, the yangyang who is still a little too shy about coming over to your house when you’re both alone, the yangyang who fell out of a tree trying to get a stuck balloon untangled for a crying toddler

he looks serious and focused - he looks more mature

when the set ends he jogs over, lifting his shirt up to wipe the sweat from his face and you realize you’re also still a little shy, averting your eyes to the side

he doesn’t notice, if he did - you would not hear the end of it - as he leans forward to kiss your nose

you pull back and tell him ew- he’s so sweaty and smelly - but he just pouts and says thats never bothered you before!

“yeah, it’s never bothered you before so you guys should just make out-”

hendery’s voice echoes from somewhere before you presume kun puts a stop to that

yangyang raises an eyebrow

and you give in - leaning in to press your lips to him

“salty?” he asks when he pulls away, “very!”, you laugh and yangyang joins in

“oh sicheng you’re back?”

the sentence drowns you and yangyang’s momentary bliss

you don’t want to turn around and see if it’s really him - but yangyang leans away from you so you stand up too

“how was your trip?” it’s kun’s voice - followed by yukhei who exclaims that he’s missed him so much!

sicheng answers them, looking over his shoulder at you and yangyang

the sounds of the park all wash out - you don’t feel anything romantic toward sicheng, but this is still awkward and you’re more than anything worried about-

“yangyang - can i be on your team?”

sicheng is referring to the next game and you want to say something to yangyang about how it’s really all over, like it didn’t ever even mean anything

but then sicheng looks at you

“can i steal your boyfriend away for a bit?”

the playful banter sizzles the tension down and you feel yourself relax, and yangyang does too

“sure bro, but you better have gotten good during your trip - your freethrows always suck!”

sicheng laughs and you do too, kissing yangyang’s cheek before he goes back to join his friends

when it gets too dark to play anymore and everyone’s exhausted - yangyang and you part from the group

hendery tries to yell something about kids being safe, kun drags him away by the ear, xiaojun, yukhei and ten echo the sentiment anyway and sicheng says;

“im happy for you guys.”

you feel yangyang squeeze your hand in his - when it’s just you and him left

you shiver a little because summer is ending and falls kiss is sweeping in

yangyang shrugs off the grey hoodie he’s always wearing and you slip it on before taking his hand in yours again

“was it weird seeing sicheng again?”

“not really - i mean it’s just sicheng.”

you stop walking and yangyang does too

“he’s your friend and he’s just my friend. seriously. yangyang i want you to know that.”

he smiles softly, not the big toothy grin you’re used to, and tugs you a little into him

“i know that.”

he kisses your hair and then laughs

“if it was me, you would have jumped right into my arm-”

“yangyang!”

you give him a look and he swears he’s joking, he promises

but he’s also right

years later - as you’re standing in the airport looking up at the switchboard of flights

you light up when you see that the plane from taiwan is landing

you rush to the gate and wave as soon as you sicheng

he waves back, and so does kun and ten and everyone

and holding up the end is yangyang who abandons his luggage, to come barreling toward you

you can’t hold it too, it’s been all summer that he and the rest of them have been gone

and it’s been so boring without him, and so lonely, so when he opens his arms

you do jump right into them - getting attacked in a whirlwind of kisses

the rest of the group catches up to you two and from somewhere you can hear kun mutter

“they’re acting like kids”

but sicheng defends you two

“let them, they’ve been looking at each other since then.”

when yangyang finally decides to let you go, he adds:

“yep, and we haven’t stopped since.”

original by warmau

masterlist

[reallymisssummer]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au sicheng

disclaimer | masterlist

there is a sound that seltzer water makes when you drop something into it, like a slice of fresh fruit, like a little pop of fireworks

you remember liking the sound ever since you were young, much has changed since then, but you still like it now

you put the last bottle in the basket of your bike and check your phone, the farmers market opens in half an hour

your stand is much smaller than the rest, a lot of the people are driving down into town from large farms in the countryside. some local restaurants are setting up summertime stalls. 

your little abode is all but a wooden table you brought last night from your balcony, covered in a checkered cloth and a handwritten sign

cold sparkling cherry ades & lemonade - home made

though meager, you are content - setting out the cooler you expertly tied to the side of your handlebars with the drinks you’ve prepared

the summer sun beats down on your shoulders, but you don’t mind 

the people watching is a fun activity for an otherwise boring summer

the first couple of days, you’re not surprised by the scarce amount of customers

every other stand has more options and more people - but you still manage to sell some bottles, and with each one, you get a satisfied smile from the customer

one afternoon, you’re halfway through a book you’ve brought along when someone’s shadow casts over you

you close it and look up to see - 

“dong sicheng?”

“ah, i thought it was you.”

he’s taller than you remember, and broader. 

the hair longer at the back of his neck.

“are you back for the summer, i heard you spent last semester abroad?”

he nods, fingers reaching for one of the bottles of cherry ade

“can i buy one?”

you smile, “it’s on the house. tell me if you like it.”

he takes his time opening it, taking a long drink

you notice how his hand is large, big enough to wrap around the entire bottle’s width

he finally turns back to you and smiles, soft, “i do like it.”

you lean forward a little - “it’s my grandmothers recipe.”

“isn’t it just sparkling water and fruit?”

he tilts his head and you shake your head, “there’s a secret ingredient.”

his brown eyes reflect into an almost homey yellow when the sunrays beat down directly onto them

“what is it?”

you shrug, “secret- remember?”

he waves and you realize only a couple of minutes after he has gone

that he left money on the table

you bike back in the summer night breeze, suddenly remembering the last time you saw him - dong sicheng.

it was almost two years ago, since then he’s spent his time out of the country. 

you had passed his group of friends in the park, but he wasn’t ever there 

he’s grown, he got more handsome.

you wobble on your bike a little at the intrusive thought. you shake it out, instead focusing on the preparation for tomorrows market.

about a week passes, and maybe word has gotten out about your cherry ade, because you get a little more business

and sicheng keeps showing up

you keep giving him the drink for free - but somehow money always ends up on the table or in the tip jar

you think you should confront him, but that might be rude. 

so you just put it in a separate little box, planning that one day you’ll see him and give it all back.

it’s a friday when you look up from your book and see several shadows overcasting yours

you recognize them; kun, hendery, xiaojun, yukhei, ten, and yangyang

hendery pulls a bottle of lemonade from your cooler and grins

“so this is the stuff sicheng keeps drinking?”

kun snatches it and settles it back between the ice

“no, it’s the cherry ade.”

he turns to you with a slight grin, “but i don’t think it’s just the cherry ade he’s been coming back for.”

you have no idea what he’s talking about - and you put a hand on your hip

“do you guys want to buy something or-”

“sorry, seven cherry ades please.”

you count them - “but there’s only six of you.”

“we’re getting one for sicheng.”

your heart sinks a bit when you assume that means sicheng won’t come himself 

but place the seven bottles into a brown paper bag

kun thanks you, hands you the money, but you refuse it

“i keep telling sicheng they’re on the house, but he keeps giving me money. ill just assume he paid for those seven in …. theory.”

kun smiles because he understands what you mean 

hendery just looks at xiaojun for some help, but gets a halfhearted mumble in return

as the market closes for the day, the moon is peeking up in the sky 

but it isn’t dark just yet

you pack what’s leftover into your bikes basket before walking out to the sidewalk

parked on the edge is a car you’re not familiar with, between all the vans from the different farms

the car door opens and sicheng’s tall figure folds himself out of the drivers seat

“do you bike home alone?”

“it’s only three miles, it really isn’t anything to be worried about.”

he tilts his head toward the trunk

“i think your bike will fit - and you can hold the basket up front.”

you are a little dizzy suddenly when you’re seated beside him and sicheng is pulling out from his parking spot 

it has been silent since those words and you want to say something to avoid this kind of dense atmosphere so you open your mouth - but nothing comes out

why am i nervous? 

“i heard my friends visited you today, im sorry if they bothered you. some of them are -” he shakes his head a bit “a handful.”

“i assume you mean hendery?”

“that one and yangyang, sometimes ten and xiaojun get looped into it too. yukhei is too nice to say no.”

“kun?”

he slows the car a little at a red light

“he’s too smart to go along with the idiocy.” 

“he said something to me today.”

sicheng swallows, you catch his reflection in the car mirror

“he said you don’t only show up for the cherry ade….to the farmers market i mean, do you -”

you sit up straighter and your grip on the basket of leftover drinks tightens

“do you have another stall you like-”

“it’s you.”

the car starts moving again

“me?”

he seems to come out of his tight skin for a second, rolling his shoulders back but never letting go of the wheel

he keeps his eyes on the road till you get to your house, you have no idea how he remembers where you live, but you ask again before you get out

“me?”

finally sicheng turns to you and in the close proximity you see how the two years of age has made him more defined 

“there were things about this place the i missed when i left, but i -”

he lets go of the wheel

“but i was surprised when i missed you.”

the night sky has come out fully now, which is weird - not much time seems to has past

“oh, i -” it had never occurred to you if you missed him too. maybe part of you did, subconsciously, because when you saw him again at the market you had felt more whole than before.

“don’t worry about feeling the same-” he sighs, voice smaller than before but still deep “i just wanted to let you know because my friends will probably open their big mouth-”

“can you kiss me?”

sicheng obliges, with only a second of hesitance, and it is slightly awkward because it’s over the middle partition and all and you’re holding the basket of unsold drinks

but it’s nice and it tastes like summer

and when he pulls back you say thank you out of sheer disorientation and happiness

only in the morning do you realize, i left the bike in his trunk!

you are ok with walking the two miles and you ready yourself for it but when you leave your house parked out front is sicheng

your bike is out of the trunk but when you put a hand on it he offers instead to drive you to the market

that way you can carry more drinks and he’ll drive you home after it closes too.

“you don’t have to do all that.”

“i want to.”

sicheng gets into the routine of doing it for you everyday, you insist numerous times that the bike is fine, but he never seems to fully listen

the only repayment he ever asks for are cold glasses of the cherry ade

and sometimes one more of those short, sweet in-car kisses

one morning as you’re walking out to meet him again he asks, gently, if you can skip this one day at the market

“why?”

“i thought we could go do something together.”

you agree, he could have just said date - you think with a little laugh to yourself, and are surprised when sicheng drives you out and down to the lake

there’s a sectioned off area for an outdoors cafe and when you both order the same cherry flavored drink, you note it as a coincidence

when it arrives, sicheng takes the first drink

“your homemade one is better.”

“i think you’re a little biased there.”

you feel him outstretch his long legs under the table, his ankles on either side of yours

the lean a little onto you, not too much, just enough minimal contact

“will you ever tell me the secret ingredient for it?”

he asks and you put your hands down on the table so they’re also just in reach of his own

he seems to get the signal and puts his hands down too, pinkies brushing pinkies

“if i decide you deserve to know.”

he sits up, “what’s the criteria for being worthy?”

you look away - out onto the lake 

“telling you would be cheating.”

“well, i have all summer to figure it out then.”

the rest of the date, as you are sure that’s what it is, goes so comfortably that it almost is like sicheng had never been gone for those two years

it’s as if you’ve seen him everyday and he’s held your hand everyday and he’s admired you when he thought you couldn’t notice…….everyday

when it finally is time to walk back to the car for the drive home

he stops and says with an almost delicacy about it, that you two should have a first - real - kiss

he keeps his hands to himself when he says this and you can tell he’s trying to be careful with you

you don’t like that, and so you take his larger wrists and drag him toward you until you place them where you want them - on your hips

you look up at him and his pupils seem just a bit blown out

“you said a real kiss right?”

you lean in first, which catches sicheng by surprise, he makes another sound of it when you tug his lower lip between your teeth

his fingers curl a little into the fabric of your shorts and you mutter before you break apart that you are not a glass bottle of cherry ade, he doesn’t have to handle with too much care

from then on it is a flurry, the rest of the summer still has you working the farmers market but you spend too many ‘breaks’ in between kissing with sicheng pressing your back up against a hidden wall or a tree

when some of the farmers or other stall owners catch you, they rush away and giggle when you pass by during closing

one of the local florist stalls corners sicheng before he makes his way over to you and insists he give you this bouquet

you set it up beside your cooler and sicheng takes a long drink before he joins you behind the table

he watches you play with his fingers while you wait for customers and although he tries to poise himself

in five minutes time he asks if you can take another break

with his lips on yours you get that aftertaste of cherries - and you love it

on the night you have you first complete sell out, all bottles gone, you say you and sicheng should celebrate

he assumes you mean go out to dinner or something but you tell him to drive you home now

and when he parks you take his hand in yours and lead him inside

the middle of the summer is the hottest and the stickiest and you leave the window open regardless of what the neighbors might hear because of it

sicheng, though you warned him to not be all too careful, is so considerate the whole time you are the one who has to pull your own shirt off first and everything else with it

in front of wide, flustered, and slowly darkening gaze of him

when you wake him up the next morning, he’s groggy and gives you a little sound of protest - you sit in your bed eating cherries and then tell sicheng you can tie the knot with your tongue

he watches you do it and before you can finish, he pulls you back down ontop of him

the summer’s sweetness of sicheng and your cherry ade continues until you start to realize the nights are getting longer and cooler

and the questions dawns on you

is sicheng here for good? or is he going to leave again, for another year, or two, or three?

you feel weird about asking him, because if he wants to go then you don’t want him to rethink it at the expensive of you

so you don’t - not until it’s the last day of the farmers market and you are standing beside him with his hand on your waist and you go

“are you ready to hear the secret ingredient?”

“oh - i finally deserve to know?”

he nuzzles a kiss against your ear

“i want you to know it before you…….if you leave, i want you to know it if you leave because i might not be able to tell you-”

his hand drops and you realize this is your fear coming to fruition 

“im not leaving.”

you turn, so fast you almost knock the cooler over but sicheng catches it before the glass bottles can go tumbling to the ground

“you’re not?”

“no. i don’t have any reason too because there’s something here i want to stay for now.”

he props the cooler back up and catches you still looking at him, he smiles softly

“unless you want me to go?”

“no!” you throw your hands around his neck and pull him down into a kiss that he has to stop because you are still in public

“then i wont go, i didnt plan on it and im not going to change my mind. i promise.”

he adds and you nod, an assurance coating the the doubt and terror that had built a home within you

“oh- the secret ingredient is-”

you lean up to whisper in his ear and he stifles a chuckle and a unsatisfied, ‘really?’ 

you pretend to be offended, but nod - “yes. really.”

“well i feel honored to know.”

his hand settles back on your waist and you lean into his side,

“you should be. you’re the only other person on earth right now who does.”

you remember liking the sound ever since you were young, much has changed since then, but you still like it now - that sound that seltzer makes when you drop something into it

you think sicheng has grown to love it too

standing behind you in the kitchen as you cut fresh cherries in halves and he watches

hands on either side of you - wedding band gleaming

“your hands are all dirty-” he mumbles and you take the diced cherries and plop three at a time into the glass bottles

the rest you feed to him over your shoulder, one for him - one for you

“ill wash them after im done.” 

he takes one of your hands and kiss them, you swat him away and tell him to go take the tray of glass bottles to the dining room

all your friends are there waiting patiently, all older, but all still together

hendery claps his hands and you hear it from the kitchen

he takes a bottle and goes, “isn’t this the real reason you married them sicheng - all the free cherry ade in the world.”

you hear a sound and kun grumbling the words, “don’t be dumb hendery.”

you laugh and turn the water on to wash your hands - you don’t hear it but xiaojun whispers to sicheng

“so - what’s the special ingredient, did they ever tell you?”

“i bet it’s love or something, right sicheng?”

ten snorts and sicheng looks through the room at you, standing in the home you’ve built together, smiling to yourself

“you could say it’s something like that.”

original by warmau

masterlist

[reallymisssummer]

Masterlist

NCT

NCT 127

TBA

NCT Dream

TBA

WayV

Kun

Ten

Winwin/Sicheng

Xiaojun

Hendery

Yangyang