RealPartoftheShow

[stagefoot]

I swear a good 30% of backstage interactions are just people whispering “Sorry!” quietly but urgently

[realpartoftheshow]

I was on TV promoting “A Real Part of the Show”!!

I had asked my friend, the wonderful Dennis Bova, to help me put up flyers for my upcoming Author Reading in book stores libraries around town. When we met about it, he asked if he should also try and get me on WTOL Your Day, the local morning news show. He's a retired newspaperman, and knows the right people to contact. I said that would great, thinking, yeah right. Next you can ask the New York Times Book Review to do a spread.

Two days later I woke up to an email, saying I was booked for Monday, December 16. Unbelievable.

I arrived at the studio and was ushered over to a waiting area with couches. A woman came over, set me up with a body mic, then left again. I waited, expecting some kind of pre-interview from a producer, until it slowly dawned on me that wasn't happening. They just came up to me at one point and said, okay we're ready for you now.

I was led into the studio and introduced to Amanda, the host. I sat down, and she started telling me about how she did theatre in high school. Good, I thought, she'll get it. Then the guy behind the camera said, 15. Is that what I think it is? Amanda kept talking as he said 10,  then 5, 4, 3, and then she was on camera.

I had no idea what she was going to ask, but I felt like I did a pretty good job of thinking on my feet and saying the right things. A third of the way in, I remembered to focus on not slouching. I kept waiting for her to ask about the reading, which was supposed to be the reason I was there, but she kept talking about the book and then it felt like we were wrapping up. I quickly got in a plug, and just like that it was over. They all said I did well. Then I went in to work.

Everyone at WTOL was super nice, and it was so amazing to have that experience.

[realpartoftheshow]

The Author Fair at Franklin Park Mall on Saturday was a success! I sold a lot of books and made some new friends, although I was very tired by the end.

[realpartoftheshow]

The Worst Scene Change Ever

In 2012 we did “Bordertown Cafe,” about a family-owned restaurant in a small town near the Canada-US border. Act 1 was set in the kitchen, and act 2 was in the dining area.

Someone, I don’t know who, but someone thought it would be a great idea to do it as a revolve. To put two different heavy counters, various other furniture and set pieces, and actual freaking refrigerator on a 20-foot diameter turntable, and make me and my crew push it around at intermission, then push it back to reset. We are not the crew of “Hamilton,” or the original “Les Mis.” This was a lot to ask.

I tried to get some big strong men on the team, but ended up with three other women. Tough women who weren’t afraid of hard work, but still rather lacking in the necessary upper body strength. Luckily, we were able to draft the understudy to the male lead, to give us hand.

Still, it was really heavy, and really hard to move. It was also super-depressing to have to move it right back an hour later. The worst part was, at intermission I had to yell ONE-TWO-THREE GO to get us all pushing at the same time, then at one point yell STOP so we could re-position, then ONE-TWO-THREE GO again. With no grand curtain, so the audience members in the house could stand there and watch. This is exactly what you don’t want as a crew member — people paying attention to you. One of the major points I tried to make in the novel.

Most nights, they even applauded, which was very sweet but also humiliating.

The set did look cool, though. With the big pass-through window upstage,  it really felt like two different sides of the same cafe. It was just another example of some people not fully thinking about the crew.

[happyhamildays]

[biasinboy-deactivated20220427]

stage managers: threats for uncooperative actors

begin to say the M-word

whisper that you’re “gonna tell the director,” but don’t specify what

threaten to steal their tea bags

threaten to mention Alexander Hamilton in a room full of other theatre kids

play the first few seconds of the Cats trailer

film them singing along to “One Day More” and tell them you’ll send it to their crush

bring up their Glee phase

threaten to highlight the wrong part in their script

tell them you’ll convince the director to change the off-book deadline

start to sing The Book of Mormon in front of your teachers/their parents

tell them you’ll convince the director to do a ball toss warm-up 

say you’ll hang their costumes inside-out

threaten to have a room full of theatre kids sing Happy Birthday to them

find the DVD of their last show and start to watch it in front of them

threaten to steal their phone while they’re waiting for the cast list e-mail (note: incurs significant risk of bodily harm)

promise to move an onstage furniture piece the tiniest bit out of alignment with the spike tape so that every time they look at it, they are filled with nameless frustration and rage 

[playbill]

Watch Anthony Ramos and Cast in First Trailer for In the Heights Movie

[evanbuckleyed]

one day hozier is gonna cover hallelujah and by god it’ll kill me but what a way to go

[heck-yeck-deck-tech]

Actor: *doesn’t say a line i’m supposed to a cue off of*

Me, over headset: L-…lights go?

Director: Oh, sorry those lines got cut.

Me, experiencing a sudden, immersive bout of self-doubt: Oh? When? Sorry I missed that.

Director: Oh, three minutes ago when we were on break.

Me: Oh. Reasonably.

[realpartoftheshow]

Director: *dies violently*

[stagefoot]

During Q2Q:

LD: I do have a few calling notes for you, SM.

SM: You’d like them to happen when they’re supposed to happen?

LD: Not to put too fine a point on it...yes.

[littlethingwithfeathers]

Me in the booth when I’m anxious to start the show but there’s nothing to do.

[realpartoftheshow]

Also in the green room, the hall outside the green room, and sometimes backstage.

[realpartoftheshow]

Writing is hard

After giving up on the dream of writing a TV show about a theatre crew, I thought turning the idea into a book would be no big deal. Convert the pilot script into prose, and finish the story from there. Shouldn’t be that much work.

It took me five years.

I quickly found out that working from my dining room table came with too many distractions, so I started carting my laptop down to the library on weekends. I’d set myself up in a private study room, all ready to work, but first I’d need to check Facebook. Also Twitter. Then I had to find just the right music to put myself in the right frame of mind to concentrate. I’d finally settle in and get a little work done, but before long I’d need to go to the bathroom. I certainly wasn’t leaving my computer unattended in a public place, and by the time I’d packed everything up to take it with me, it was just easier to go home for the day.

Next I tried taking my own little writing retreats, where I rented a hotel room and worked late into the night, but that got expensive real fast and also my husband wasn’t thrilled.

Finally I figured out how to create a quiet writing space in our sun room. It’s an uninsulated addition on the back of our house, so most of the year it’s either freezing cold or boiling hot, but I made it work. Then came the real challenge — actually making myself go out there most weekends and some evenings, on a regular basis, and keep at it until the thing was done. If I didn’t set a routine and stick to it, nothing happened.

I took some breaks, especially when I was working on a play, but I always went back to it, and after eight drafts I was ready to publish.

[heck-yeck-deck-tech]

tech accomplishment - changing cues to be called off movement in a bit of fight choreography instead of lines the actors don’t know

[heck-yeck-deck-tech]

tech week is just:

*eat first dinner at 4:12pm and second dinner at 1am* *rewrite a cue* *turn the lighting channel off because the lighting designer won’t stop muttering to himself* *finally walk out of the theater at 12:17am* *rewrite a cue* *politely refuse a can of beer from your production manager* *experience momentarily overwhelming self-doubt* *rewrite a cue* *scream a little bit during first dress out of sheer frustration* *accidentally leave your talk on and say ‘shit’ over headset* *rewrite a cue* *argue the director out of changing more lines* *rewrite a

[otherwindow]

Consider: A fantasy series where the court wizard is treated and portrayed just like an IT guy. Court Wizard, fixing the Queen’s magic mirror: has’t thee attempted cleansing and reapplying the runes anew?

[otherwindow]

Court Wizard sees like 17 hexes in the magic mirror and finds out the Flamebarrier blessing was turned off.

[otherwindow]

Court Wizard finally fixes the magic mirror and sees a reflection of the Queen reciting: Show me beautiful forest nymphs. Show me where to find beautiful forest nymphs. Show me local witches willing to summon beautiful forest nymphs to my kingdom. Show me beautiful witches. Show m

[realpartoftheshow]

[mondays-off]

I said what I said