Am I the asshole?

@reddit-aita

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153 posts

AITA for making a scene of my adult son and sticking my nose in his marriage

I’m 60 and bad with the whole text thing on mobiles so I’m hoping I won’t be judged on my grammar

Here’s the important background my daughter in law (32) and son(33) have 3 children aged 3 years 2 years and 4 months . He convinced her to be a stay at home mom and sell her business by telling her how good of a childhood he had and how happy my marriage was without telling her (which I today found out) that our arrangement was everything everything before 9am and After 5pm was split 50/50, Sunday was my day off and I was brought out twice a week.

On to the story- on my last visit I noticed my daughter in law was struggling mentally so I,my sister(55f) and her girlfriend (53) pulled our money together and paid for a spa weekend for them while we’d babysit the kids for her birthday last weekend.

I was preparing on Thursday evening for the kids to arrive when my dil rang me holding back tears saying they’d won’t be going because my sons friend came to town and he said he wanted to spend the weekend with his friends catching up. I pressed her a little and I’m talking a little about her situation , she came clean about him doing no chores,no date nights and her basically doing all of the child care because “that’s what stay at home moms do” I was honestly disgusted. I convinced her to drop me off the kids and bring a friend to the spa I even dipped into my savings to give her €500 to buy herself something nice. When she dropped me off the kids I begged her to tell me were son was after 5 minutes she told me the bar. She left for the spa while I left for the bar (she knew I was going there and knew my sister/my sister in law were taking care of the kids)

Here’s were I might be the asshole I when to the bar were he and his friends were, I sat down next to the Group and asked my son “did i fail you as a mother or was it your father because we both thought your partner comes before your silly drunk friends” the post is getting long enough but long story short I humiliated him and got myself banned from a bar

My dil said she will taking the kids to her parents when she gets back tomorrow and my son is calling me an asshole for humiliating him/ sticking my nose in his marriage Maybe I should have stayed out i don’t know

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AITA for canceling the family trip because my stepson damaged my plants?

I grow indoor plants and keep them around the house whether by the kitchen window or out on the front porch. I have a variety of plants like Lily, aloe vera, also flowers and they all require care and attention. It's a hobby of mine and because I don't own enough space I just stick to indoor planting.

I have a 16 year old stepson Sean who loves to pull all kinds of pranks and has been trying some weird-prankes on me lately. I don't mind it as long as he's happy and also because nothing is too serious just hiding my farming tools/replacing them with damaged ones and so on. He just keeps messing around like any other kid. days ago he posted a FB video of him spraying cold water on me when I was sleeping. It was embarrassing since he shared it with family. I got mad at him and had him delete it despite him begging me to let him keep it. He kept sulking afterwards and had his mom try to convince me to let him repost the video but I thought that was crazy request. Sean suddenly became friendly and asked if he could water my plants, I was glad he asked and gave him the watering can and told him to start with the plants in the kitchen. He was gone for few minutes then he got back and started watering all the plants in the house.

Later in the evening I was cleaning my tools and there was a weird smell coming from the watering can. It smelled like bleach. I freaked out and checked my plants and the same smell was coming from them . I confronted Sean and asked what he watered the plants with. He acted dumb and said nothing but I found a bottle of bleach in his room which made me lose my temper. He admitted watering my plants with bleach to get back at me for making him remove the video. I was mortified I immediately canceled the weekend trip to the national park that he was looking forward to. he started crying saying it was too much and he made a mistake in moment of clouded judgement. I refused to discuss it, My wife feels bad Sean hasn't been eating well since I canceled the trip but he damaged my plants and caused me hurt and pain. She thinks an apology was enough, he is a kid and made a mistake. She wanted me to let it go but I said canceling the trip is his official punishment, Period I got called unreasonable and stubborn for this and that I don't respect her as a parent too and said taking away the only thing he cares about the most and look forward the most reeks of ab%$&se.

Sean has this mentally that if he admits doing something wrong then he'll be forgiven. This isn't how it should be but his mother thinks admitting to it and apologizing should be the end of it.

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AITA for telling my surrogate to stop acting like she was my husband's wife?

My husband and I have been together for 5 years. We wanted kids but because of my health problems this wasn’t possible. We decided to go with surrogacy, my friend nominated her sister ( Brittany 29) I agreed right away cause I know Brittany and the family. We’ve set everything up. Discussed payment, short and long term plans, counseling and dr appointments. We explored IVF and chose a private clininc to get it done.

It started after Brittany took a pregnancy test. She only told my husband though she had both our numbers. she only sent my husband a pic of the test while he was at work and sent me nothing when I gave her my personal contact info but it was okay. Things got complicated when Brittany started having access to our credit cards for her own wants and claim they were the baby’s needs. She excluded me from dr visits and scans and had only my husband go with her. Her excuse was my husband drives and has time since I work and “unavailable” most of the time. I felt isolated from this experience but said nothing knowing she’s bearing a lot of burden so I had patience. My husband had no idea what was going on and if this was normal. This was new to us so we didn’t know.

She’s 7 months in and last week she had us visit to discuss things that I thought we’d previously agreed on but she said she changed her mind about and her mom was there too. I heard Brittany out and was shocked when she gave a list of how things should be from now on since she said “there was lot of confusion” in the past cause of me stressing her out by complaining. She requested she gets say in things like baby name after I “deleted” the list of names she sent to my husband. She wanted more access to my husband’s credit cards/free time to get stuff done at her place. Also more time with the baby than agreed on. Then wrapped up by saying only my husband should be with her in the delivery room and used the hospital as excuse. I got up and firmly stated I don’t agree on her new terms and that she had to stop acting like she was my husband’s wife and this was their baby. My husband didn’t speak til she started crying. He asked me to sit down but I said I had boundaries, reminded her what her role was and how she overstepped.

Her mom went off and and said her daughter was being mistreated when she put herself mentally and physically through the most selfless act for us, to make us a family. She gave up a part of her life in those months to give us what we want and I was acting selfish and ungrateful. She had us leave then told my friend and it got more complicated. I was told to apologize for what i said. IATA

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AITA for buying my boyfriend birthday gifts? I am confused and upset

My boyfriend turned 21 last week and I bought him a new video game he had been wanting and a t-shirt.

He started ignoring me and leaving me on read after that.

I asked him what was wrong and he finally said it was unfair that I got him birthday presents because now he's going to have to get me something for my birthday and that I am being manipulative.

I told him no you don't have to get me anything for my birthday but I'd like to spend some time with you that day but he said that it was a "dick move" that I got him gifts. He says I was trying to make him feel obligated. I told him it is the thought that counts and that he doesn't have to get me anything but that if he does, I'd be happy with just a card but he keeps saying he is unsure he can deal with a materialistic girlfriend.

Was it wrong that I got him gifts? I can't understand any more.

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AITA for insisting I get the phone back despite policy?

My kids attend a year round school and started back up for the new term 2 weeks ago. My eldest (16F) ended up getting her phone confiscated for using it during class to watch TikTok. We had discussed this before she even got the phone, then had some issues last year. As a last resort, I told her if that happened again, the phone would become mine and she’d get an old flip phone that was my husband’s with no internet until she could prove trust.

The school policies had changed this term from a phone would be confiscated until a parent could come get it to a phone would be kept for 2 weeks as a first offense, 3 for second, so on and so forth. I wasn’t okay with this as I don’t trust the school to not lose it (i know they’ve lost/broken other students’ phones) plus I don’t want them having access to my daughter’s private info. I went to the school and requested it back, saying I wouldn’t give it to my daughter but I paid for it. Secretary gave me the spiel and I didn’t blame her but asked to speak with the vice principal. He comes out and repeats them. I said okay but I’m the parent, I paid for it and I never signed anything giving you permission to hold it. They were refusing so I said I’d sit in the office until it was given back. I did so and waited for close to 2 hours. Finally the principal came out and said I needed to leave. I said if I left, I’d be back with a police escort. At that point, the phone was returned to me.

My husband says I “Karen’d” my way out of it. To me, it’s not their property to take. AITA?

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AITA for pointing at the kitchen when MIL asked "where is our dinner?".

My husband had a serious injury weeks ago. He's bed ridden and his family come to see him everyday. MIL keeps "drilling" what I need to do to make my husband comfortable but does nothing to help. Just visits everyday and sits around expecting to be fed and entertained. Sometimes BIL, his wife & kids join them and turn the house into a mess.

Yesterday MIL, her husband and son came again. They checked on my husband then went to sit in the living room for hours. I served them coffee and croissant. Hours later my husband threw up again (2nd time) I had to take care of changing his clothes and cleaning the sheets to avoid infections. I was exhausted, I came downstairs and MIL looked at me and asked " hey where's our dinner?".

I was shocked that after seeing me go up and downstairs many times and cleaning and bringing new sheets and running the washing machine that she'd expect me to prepare dinner. I'd already eaten a sandwich at 6 and yogurt ( I have problems with my stomach and stress and pregnancy made it worse, I'm 4 months in)

I pointed at the kitchen and told her to help herself out. She gave me a look then said she didn't expect me to ask her to cook dinner at my house. I said I didn't expect her to ask ME to cook dinner while I'm taking care of her son. She started arguing about the way I spoke about my husband saying as his partner, this is the least I could do and called me unhinged for throwing in her face that I'm helping my husband.

She got her husband involved asking what his thoughts were on me making guests go hungry and forcing them to cook themselves when this supposed to be my duty as a host/home owner. FIL said they could order food and call it a day and yelled at my younger BIL to stop playing on his phone and order food but MIL got mad and lashed out criticizing me saying I wasn't up to the challenge of taking care of my home and my guests like an adult. I lost it on her and told them to leave since she kept yelling disrupting my husband's sleep. She left after saying she felt sorry for her son and grandbaby with an "aggressive wife and a mother like me".

She told everyone and my older BIL said he understood I'd a lot on my plate but lectured me about how I should have respect for his mom who was a guest. Repeatedly saying if that was his wife she wouldn't have acted this way. And that I shouldn't use taking care of my husband against them. He asked me to apologize but I didn't.

Info: My husband suffers from 2 major injuries and he's got a long recovery ahead. Right now there's so much pressure to take care of him while keeping up with house chores and work. My mom and sister help but not MIL. She claimed that when I told them to leave I was refusing to let her see her sick son but I'd never do that. I lost a loved one before seeing them so I understand her fear but BIL thought that was my goal.

EDIT: I live in the states, in the south.

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AITA for leaving a family gathering because my family made me sit at the kid table?

For context: I haven’t seen my full family together in quite some time, so they set up a get together at a park today. The family gathering includes me (22m), my brother (21), my sister (25), her husband (29) and their two kids, my dad, step-mom and her kids (6 and 9) aunt, uncle, my two cousins (15 and 20), grandma, and grandpa.

I get there with some picnic items (I brought a quiche and the cups) and see a few members setting up. I say hi and help set up the tables and set the food out. We talk and play games while the others show up. When everyone gets there, we sit down to eat. I sit next to my dad and get a weird look from my aunt as she says to me, “this is the adult’s table.” To which I reply, “I am an adult(?).” She tells me that the 1st and 2nd generations are considered adult and the 3rd and 4th generations should sit at the kid’s table since we “don’t have much to contribute to adult conversations.” I tell her that I can drink, that I drove here, that I pay rent and have a job, so how am I still considered a child? She says that until I have kids of my own I’ll have to sit at the kid’s table.

According to my aunt, there are 8 children (ages 6-22) and 8 adults (ages 25-75) so I should just sit at the kid’s table since it’ll be even, but there is plenty of space at the adult table and I don’t want to be stuck with 5 literal children. She still disagrees and at this point my uncle and grandparents back her up, so I say fuck it, take my quiche back, tell them to have a nice day, and drive away. I get a few texts telling me to come back by my dad and grandparents. I ask if aunt is going to apologize and they ask “for what?” That was enough for me to disregard their other messages and calls until I got home, where I am now.

I feel shitty that I may have possibly ruined a nice family gathering, but feel my family doesn’t respect me at all, enough to say that I am still a child and apparently have the same mentality as 6 year olds. AITA?

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AITA for not lying about why I could not remove my headscarf?

I have not been able to sleep over this, so I made a reddit just for a judgement! Thanks!

I(24F) am a bridesmaid for one of my closest friends, Jackie(24F). Ive been so excited to help! I was in charge of the bridal shower: the games, decorations, menu, I left the guest list to Jackie’s sister

Due to religious reasons, I wear a headscarf. I love and am proud of it. In the groupchat with other bridesmaids, I was talking about how excited I am to attend a girls only event. I recently dyed my hair and wanted to show it off. I even paid extra to ask for a girls only staff that day

Day of, as guests arrive I realize that one of them is Tori(26F). I know Tori as a family friend of Jackies, but the few times I met her, it was before her transition to female. I was aware of it but unaware she was coming to the shower. I dont mind at all ofc and shes a lovely person but I decided to keep my scarf on

As everyone’s eating later, Im passing by the tables to make sure everyone’s good and one of the bridesmaids mentioned that they hadnt gotten to see my hair and theyd wanted to see the change in person. I tried to dismiss it at first or say oh I’ll show you later. But the other girls at the table got curious. I got uncomfortable and I just said “Oh I’m actually not really comfortable taking it off right now” When pressed as to why, I said theres guests I don’t feel comfortable taking it off in front of. There was a collective “ohhh” and I thought cool thats over. But one girl got aggressive and asked if Im referring to Tori. Shes loud and other tables turn to look. I dont answer. the girl asks if I wear one around men, so I say yes. She says theres no men here so “clearly you should take it off”. I tell her again that Im keeping it on

Another bridesmaid defends me and tell the girl to chill out. Tori comes over and says me not taking it off is a slap in the face to her identity. Im just shocked and had no clue what to do

Eventually Tori and a few girls left saying they felt it was disrespectful. I feel awful that this ruined a beautiful day for my friend. Its causing more trouble with people threatening to leave the wedding over discrimination towards me or towards Tori

I dont think I was in the wrong. Just as Tori can be Tori, I can be me. I feel like it would be the equivalent of me making Tori or someone else adjust for me. I feel like we should just accept and respect each other, rather than be woke onesided

My question is more about being honest as to why I couldnt. Jackie is on my side, but Jackie’s sister is giving her hell for it. Saying she purposely left out that detail in the guest list to test me. Jackie says I shouldve brushed it off and said i was having a bad hair day or avoided giving an answer

I didnt ever mention Toris name in my answer, and I dont think my answer was rude, but seeing how much stress its causing Im thinking I should have made up a lie? AITA for how I handled the situation?

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AITA for getting a lock for my office door despite my husband's disapproval?

Me F32 and my husband M36 have been married for 10 years, and we have 2 kids. My husband is currently unemployed but I recently started working from home in my office for 5hrs. Thing is my husband would constantly barge in to my office and interrupt my work over simple requests he could get done himself (My work is usually with group and we constantly have group meetings too discuss projects)

Request such as: * Can you fix this issue in my phone?.

Can you get the kids ready while I take a shower?/can you watch the oven while I make this phonecall?

complaining about dishwasher/faucet/mixer/computer not working and asking me to stop working to get them fixed.

he'd send the kids in all the time for me to brush their hair or fix a zipper.

I've talked to him about how this has been impacting my work, I already handle the chores when I'm not working so I think 5hrs of work should be respected. He'd apologize and say he didn't know then do it again and say it was spontaneously. Two days ago, I had and important meeting and he barged in, interrupted my meeting asking me to fix his tie because he was going out later. It was horrible in front of my colleagues and superiors. I bought a lock later and installed it, when my husband got home in the evening and saw it he looked absolutely shocked. He asked what was the lock for and I replied that because of him interrupting my work sessions this was my only way. He sent the kids to their room then argued saying "I can't believe you wanna act like the kids & I are not even here and lock us out like that" I argued I didn't appreciate how disrespected my boundaries and thought the lock is the solution after I've exhausted all options. He pitched a fit saying the lock is not a good solution and expressed how hurt he was feeling. He asked "imagine how the kids are going to feel when they see it". Then went outside to smoke. He kept saying I should remove it.

AITA

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AITA for wanting to walk into my first home without my wife?

My wife [25F] and I [27M] have been married six months now. I have a good job in sales, and have managed to save enough to get together a deposit for a house. It is true that my parents have helped me out quite a bit too financially.

My wife has not been employed very consistently. She has worked as a model, but hasn’t saved much at all.

I bought the house, and the estate agent handed over the keys to me. My wife wasn’t there at the hand-over. I was obviously super excited to show her the house, and for us to start our lives together.

We drove up to the house yesterday. I said to her while we sat in the car outside: ‘is it OK if I go in alone first, just so I can have a moment alone in my first home?’ I felt that it was a Significant Moment in my life, and I wanted to experience it alone, even just for 30 seconds.

My wife was upset about this and has been off with me ever since. We have moved some of our stuff in but she’s clearly pissed. I think she’s being selfish. My brother says I am being ridiculous.

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AITA for telling another gym member to wear a bra?

I (25f) fucking hate wearing bras. They’re uncomfortable, constricting, and expensive. With work from home, I spent the last year and a half basically never wearing a bra and got used to it. Quite frankly, my boobs are nonexistent anyways.

I recently started going to the gym again and started working out braless. I should note that up until now, no one has ever pointed out anything wrong with me not wearing a bra. However, in the middle of a set of squats (yes, MID SQUAT), a guy comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder to get my attention, and tells me that my nipples are poking through my shirt. I get really irritated because why tf is this guy staring at my nipples in the first place and then stopping me mid-set to inform me?

I get really annoyed, try to finish my set, but then this fucker literally grabs the bar, as I ascend and re-racks it for me. He claimed it looked like I was having trouble with the last rep, and that he had come over to make sure I could do it, then noticed my nipples. I’m really fucking pissed off at this point and told him I didn’t need his help finishing my set and why the fuck was he looking at my chest in the first place?? He said he was going to spot me, but then noticed my chest and thought it’d be inappropriate.

I pointed out that the safety bar was set, so even if I did fail the set, he wasn’t needed. But he just insisted people at gyms look out for each other, and that going forward, I should probably wear a bra so other people wouldn’t get uncomfortable and that it may help me stay more balanced in my squats. I’m literally the only girl at the weights section of the gym at the moment, and other guys who were squatting and failed sets never have to worry about this shit. I’ve seen guys fail multiple sets in a row and no one ever rushes to their aid, but I have a very slight pause, and everyone thinks I need rescuing. So I’m now really annoyed and also kind of uncomfortable that this guy I’ve never spoken to in my life thinks he’s helping me and then has the audacity to tell me how to dress.

So I tell him “You have bigger boobs and nipples than I do. Maybe YOU should wear a bra so people won’t get uncomfortable and you won’t fail your squats.” He then got really defensive, saying he was just trying to help, then called me a bitch. Honestly I’m not sure if I overreacted, but I’m still kind of pissed off so maybe that’s clouding my judgment. AITA?

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AITA for potentially traumatizing my neighbors children after they kept coming onto my property and trying to get into my house?

Me and my now fiance have lived in this house and neighborhood for a few months now. I have a 1 year old son myself, so I know how kids can be. However, my neighbors have 3 children. A 9, 12, and 14 year old. All of them are boys. At first they weren’t too much trouble, I would just seem them running around, throwing sticks, riding scooters across the street.

But as of recently they had started getting a lot closer to my property. This all started with the oldest one throwing various trash into our yard that my fiance would continually have to pick up. Then, all 3 children started digging holes in our yard, banging on the door, and I even caught them trying to “lockpick” my front door with a bobby pin. This had happened 4 to 5 times already. Of course, I brought this up to their mother who has done little about it. They seem to have very little supervision and apparently cps had already been called numerous of times because of how often they seemed to be left alone.

I warned the mother that we have 2 big dogs, whose sole purpose was to protect against intruders. So if their sons happened to actually get into my house they would probably end up hurt. I did not want these little children to end up hurt of course, which was why I was warning her. She brushed it off, saying if anything happened to her boys she would have me promptly arrested and my dogs put down.

So, I decided to take matters into my own hands, to “ensure” the safety of these boys. As expected, the oldest one and his brothers were sneaking around my yard again. I waited until they got closer to the front door. When the second youngest opened the door, I said a command to my dogs and they immediately ran out, barking and growling.

All the boys screamed and start yelling. They ran and ran all the way until they got to their house, getting wet by the lawn sprinklers on the way. I called my dogs back( they stopped at the end of the lawn like I had trained them to) and we didn’t hear much for a few days. Their mother and the police came knocking at the door. She said some stuff about how my dogs bit her children and I was a danger to the neighbors. But I showed the security footage from my camera to the police and it pretty much died down from there.

She’s still trying to keep the case open, but I feel as if I’ve done little to no wrong. Her boys don’t bother us anymore, and her children aren’t hurt and were never going to be.

AITA?

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AITA for not paying my boyfriend Uber prices for picking me up from work?

Thank you everyone, there are too many replies to respond to. He was adamant that charging me is normal so I’ll just show him this thread to convince him otherwise.

I’m temporarily working somewhere else. It is £20 to get an Uber home. I used the app often enough that I get regular discounts up to 30%. My boyfriend offered to pick me up from work after I told him the price of the Uber sometimes. He got us home. It’s a 30 minute ride, about 20 miles. Afterwards he asked me to pay him; I said fine I don’t mind paying petrol costs. He said I’d have to give him £20 because he went out of his way to get me and I would have given it to the Uber driver anyway. He insists that it makes no sense for me not to pay him what I’d would give to the Uber driver. I told him that’s different because he’s my boyfriend and an Uber driver is a service.

I told him I’d give him £10 which he wasn’t happy about it.

AITA for not giving him what I would give for an Uber driver?

It’s not like I’d pay the price of a Starbucks coffee if my BF made me a cup of coffee.

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AITA for refusing to cut my hair for my father's wedding?

Dad (42) and my his fiancee (Alice 28) are getting married in November this year. I (15f) didn’t really like Alice because I think she replaced my mom too soon. My mom died of cancer 2 years ago and she and dad started dating 8 months after. I try to be as polite as I can whenever she’s around or starts a conversation with me. Dad never forced me to have a relationship with her and I can also see that she’s not interested in having one.

After they got engaged, Alice approached me and said we needed to talk. She said she has a clear vision of how she wants her wedding to be and that I have to comply so that everything will be perfect. I said sure and asked her what I need to do. She said, “first, I want you to cut your hair short; second, you can’t wear heels and lastly, only wear light make up and no fake lashes. Okay?” I let her finish before I responded. I said I can do the second and third but I will not be cutting my hair. My mom loves my hair and helped me grow them thick and healthy. I got my blonde wavy hair from my mom so I will keep it long. Alice accused me of wanting to upstage her. I said that’s not what I’m trying to do and I think it’s unfair since I know she didn’t make these demands on her other female guests. She then called me a selfish brat and told me she’ll tell my dad about how I “disrespected her”.

My dad then got involved and told me to just cut my hair because it will grow back anyway. I said her request is ridiculous and I’d rather not attend their wedding than to cut my hair.

I think I have put my dad in a tight situation and I am now considering cutting my hair because I know my presence in the wedding will make my dad happy. But growing my hair back to lower back length will take a long time.

AITA if I refuse to cut my hair?

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AITA for refusing to let my BIL see my son after causing me to miss his birth?

I M30s got few close friends from college that I hang out with including my BIL (sister’s husband) Austin. My wife and I are expecting our first baby and because this was our first we struggled with understanding things like whether my wife was going into labor or just dealing with pain/soreness. We ended up in the hospital for nothing since she was due in July.

Therefore, I’ve limited my time out with the guys especially in the evening/nighttime. I’ve skipped meetings with them to stay home by my wife’s side ready for any emergencies. My friends were upset they haven’t seem much of me in a while. I explained my situation but they gave me crap about it every time, especially Austin who kept pressuring me into going out for few beers saying he was in my shoes twice and has experience. he said that XYZ signs (can’t say it here) mean my wife would soon be in labor and advised me to relax.

One night I caved into going to his farm since his birthday was days prior and I missed it cause my wife got sick. He wasn’t happy and whined about it. My wife was with my in-laws and I wanted to call her but couldn’t find my phone, I put it on the counter but wasn’t there. I borrowed one of their phones after an hour or so of search to call my wife and her sister picked up asking where I was. I was in dismay when she said she was at the hospital with my wife cause her water broke and she went into labor. I couldn’t explain I drove to the hospital asap but was met with my FIL berating me for ignoring his text and 18 missed calls. I wasn’t allowed into the delivery room cause my wife screamed at me to stay out. I felt awful I waited outside while my in-laws berated me for my neglect even when I said I lost my phone.

(Chris) said Austin hid my phone after seeing FIL’s text to get back at me for missing his birthday. I blew up at Austin calling him aSOB for doing this. He said Chris was a liar and swore he didn’t see any text or calls and he hid it as joke to scare me a bit. I left after this and haven’t seen him in days. The guys got involved begging me to make things right with Austin who didn’t know, otherwise he would’ve told me so it was misunderstanding and my wife bears the blame for not letting me into the room but can I blame her? I refused to see him. My sister said I should let uncle Austin see little Timmy cause he’s longing to meet him as family and even cried and said I was being unfair to him and all those years of friendship we had. But I said no I won’t let him meet my son after this.

Chris said Austin bragged about it later on then Chris decided to tell me because he thought it was wrong that I get blamed by my in-laws.

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AITA for leaving a party because I wasn't allowed my phone?

Let me explain:

So I (18f) am in a friend group of 8 people. Every week we one person from the group hosts a gathering where we have dinner, play games, watch movies, etc. It’s really fun. One of the people in the group (Isaac) has a no phone policy in his nights. This means no tv, no music, no phones. We play board games or talk.

Around 3 weeks ago, I had to go to the hospital and was awaiting a lifechanging diagnosis. I was anxious all day but decided to go to Isaac’s gathering to get my mind off things. The morning of, I got an email from the hospital saying they’d call me at some point that day to let me know what was going on.

I text Isaac and told him situation and asked if I could keep my phone on me (he makes us put them in a box, turned off) but he didn’t reply. I showed up with my phone. When Isaac comes round with the box, I ask to talk to him privately, but he won’t until I put my phone in the box. I’m trying to explain the situation without drawing too much worry or a scene, but he isn’t listening so I walk out and sit in my friend’s car.

30 minutes later, I get the call. The outcome isn’t important to this post, but I stayed in the car for another hour and a half until my friend comes down to see me and drive me back. She said Isaac is really upset that I walked out like that, and that I should have just been forthcoming with him, but I don’t want to tell everyone what was going on, especially at the point, it wasn’t concrete.

Another friend later said I just shouldn’t have shown up if I was going to ‘cause such a fuss’ over my phone and that I know Isaac’s policy and shouldn’t expect exceptions and therefore it was a bitchy move of me to walk out.

AITA?

#reddit #aita #am i the asshole

AITA(33f) for not taking my brother's(38) kids to Disneyland with me?

Long back story. My brother and I have had a strained relationship our whole lives. We come from a really abusive home. Our mom was amazing but we were all horribly abused by our dad she couldn't/wouldn't leave.

When I was 17 I moved out of state and had very little contact with anyone outside of my mom.

My mom ended up being diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer and fought really hard for 8 years. I would fly in to visit her every few months as I could.

I ended up married to a really horrible and abusive man. He ended up having a heart attack and had to have a quad bypass. He was HORRIBLE to care for and just got more and more cruel.

3 months after his heart attack my moms health turned for the worst and she passed. Our dad was HORRIBLE to us, going as far as to try to sue us for some money our mom left us.

After the funeral my husband got more and more abusive and I took the money she had left me and filed for divorce. I decided I needed some me time so I decided to go spend some time at Disneyland and visiting family in the area.

My brother told me I was stupid for getting a hotel and I should stay with him and his family. He has 2 girls, 5 and 8 that I have only met twice.

When i get there I was shocked that him and his wife were planning to go to work and leave the kids with me. I am NOT good with kids. I don't dislike them, I just am uncomfortable being responsible for them. The entire family KNOWS this very well. I have been like that since I was a kid. I am happily child free. I told him I wasn't here to be daycare for his kids.

He got upset because he had already told our aunt she didn't need to watch them that week. I was irritated that he hadn't even asked me about this.

I told him that I wasn't planning on being available to sit at his house watching his kids while they worked and reminded him I was planning to spend a few days at "the park" which is a few hours away. I may be bad with kids, but I know better than to even MENTION Disneyland around them.

Later that night he tells me it is stupid to pay for a hotel by the park, I should just drive up for the day, then I can take the girls! Without missing a beat he asks them if they want to go spend the day with their aunt at Disneyland.The response is what you would expect.

I was floored. I told them I had to go home and I couldn't go. I grabbed my stuff and drove up and found a hotel close to the park. I spent 4 days bouncing between parks, ordering room service, going to the pool, spa and bar and a few times just drowned my sorrows alone in the hotel room.

My phone blew up with family (who I haven't been close to in over a decade) telling me how awful I was and how much I had upset the girls, my brother and his wife. That they were all grieving too and I was being selfish.

So AITA for not taking them with me?

#reddit #aita #am i the asshole

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