Vaguely Missing Link

As seen on the 6 o'clock news!    (This blog is NSFW and frequently mentions Stancest. Don't follow if uncomfortable, don't yuck my yum.)

[wannabeagrunklefan]

Hey you....just wanted to let you know how much i appreciate you. You're a beautiful person, and you deserve all the good things!

Oh my goodness! What a lovely thing to say! ;A; That really made my day, anon, thank you so much! ♡ You’re a lovely person too with a wonderfully kind heart and you made this quiet, awkward goober so happy! XD

[reinstotheworld]

She is a beautiful person! She does deserve all the good things!

BEST

POST

EVER

[excitementshewrote]

[reinstotheworld]

My younger sister died last week. We loved the Simpsons, and I found her DVD collection of the first 10 seasons while cleaning her apartment.

This gifset made me bawl.

[taztrailer]

“We’ve always struggled with finding a quick way of communicating why #TheZoneCast is worth listening to. Hopefully, this trailer for the Balance arc does the trick. Thanks for sharing it with everyone on Earth.”

Enjoy!   And check out the list of trailer credits here! https://taztrailer.tumblr.com/post/170107763441/taz-balance-animated-trailer-credits

[stanowarb2]

EMPTY NEST

A fic for @subwaystanwich celebrating Stancest Secret Santa 2017; art by @toastybumblebee​, text by redbeardbluesky.

Rating: T (language, sexual references); 2190 words.

At summer’s end, the bus rolls away from the station and Stan worries that his knees might go out from under him.  He watches the bus move farther away, growing blurry in his vision as hot tears roll down his cheeks.

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[reinstotheworld]

Now that I’m home, I’m finally getting around to posting my Stancest holiday exchange. This is for the lovely @ficksuck, who wanted some Christmas cookie shenanigans. 

Rating: PG/PG-13 (for some implied naughtiness)

Featuring: Holiday cookies, first time kisses between old Stans, and a boat that I keep changing the layout of to suit my own purposes.

Stan brushed the cookie crumbs off his stubble, then spied a large piece of what had once been a snowman resting on his belly. “Oh, thought you could get away from me, eh?” He picked up the snowman midsection and popped it into his mouth, hearing a soft tutting from behind him as he munched away on the black icing button.

“Did you have to eat the whole box?”

He held out the opened box, colorful wrapping torn at the top, and gave it a shake to prove its contents. “Despite my well-known opinions on sharing, I saved you some.”

“I thought you didn’t even like the holidays,” Ford murmured, sitting down across from him at the table. “Yet here you are, neck-deep in holiday cheer.” He peered into the box and selected a cookie that was in the shape of a dreidel, taking a bite of the frosted gimel.

“That’s a nice way of saying I’m stuffing my face. But no, that’s you, ya Scrooge. People spending lots of money on useless junk? What’s there not to love?” Stan chuckled to himself and picked up another cookie, biting into Santa’s head unceremoniously.

“Ah, seasonal greed. That makes sense.”  Ford took another bite of the dreidel cookie, finishing it off with a satisfied hum.  He picked up another from the box, a blue snowflake, and picked off two of the branches to nibble on first.

“Plus, ya know, family and all. I may not be peddling cheap crap anymore, but when you’ve got a niece sending you a box of homemade cookies it’s hard not to….I dunno.”

“Be less of a cynical bastard?” Ford supplied.

Stan snapped his fingers and pointed. “That’s the one. Less of a cynical bastard.”

Ford pulled off another branch of the cookie-snowflake, chewing quietly and making a face that worried Stan. It was his ‘I’m overthinking again and about to ask my brother an uncomfortable question’ face, and as he lifted his gaze from the box Stan braced himself.

“Do you ever think about what the holidays were like at our house when we were children?”

Yep, there it was. Stan scoffed and sat back against the chair, which let out a tired squeak from his weight.

He had to admit that he did sometimes think about his childhood in New Jersey. There were happy memories to be had there. Their parents would light the menorah and take them for Chinese on the 25th, and they would trek down to the beach in their winter gear and watch the fireworks over the bay for New Year’s. Pops would save some of the weirder things in the pawn shop to give to them for Hanukkah, old maps for Ford and weird masks for him, and Ma would get them chocolate gelt that Stan would always be too impatient to use. Ford always let him play with just the empty foil shells though, never complaining when his winnings didn’t include the candy that his brother had already eaten.

“Nah,” he lied. “Never look back, I always say.”

“Stanley, you never say that.”  

“Well, I’m gonna start now.”

Ford was obviously skeptical.

“What’s with the reminiscing anyway?” Stan deflected. “I thought holidays weren’t your thing.”  

“Why would you say that?”

Stan reached for a glass of bourbon he’d been using as a cookie chaser. “I always figured you were too busy jerking off to Popular Mechanics to care about the traditions of us mere mortals.”

Surprisingly, Ford let out a laugh. He reached into the box and pulled out a Kwanzaa kinara, candles iced in three different colors. He let out a soft, impressed-sounding whistle. “Mabel really went all out.”

“I don’t know why you’re surprised. Mabel doesn’t do anything half-assed.” Stan stuffed the rest of Santa into his mouth and made a noise, suddenly remembering that something else had come with the care package of cookies.

“Ford--” He picked up a small bundle of papers and waved them in front of Ford’s face obnoxiously.

“Ah,” Ford muttered, taking the papers and flipping through the handwritten pages quickly. “Dipper’s notes on urban legends along the California coast. Mn...thorough, as expected.”

“Merry Christmas,” Stan said dryly. “Cookies for me, and dry, boring research for you.”

Ford smirked and tucked the letter into his coat pocket. “Cookies for us, and fascinating and useful research for me.”

“Whatever.” Stan grunted, shifting in the chair to get more comfortable. The gentle rocking of the Stan O War, combined with the lump of cookie-bourbon mush now sitting in his gut, was beginning to make his head nod.  Ford continued reading his gift from Dipper at the table, the gentle rustling of the papers adding one more soothing aspect to lull him to sleep.

“Stanley. Stanley.”

“Huh? Wha…”

“Stanley,” Ford sighed. “You’re falling asleep. Go to bed.”

Stan blinked in Ford’s direction and hauled himself up slowly in response. He paused, then picked up the cookies and tucked them under his arm, box rattling as he shuffled towards the boat’s sleeping quarters.

He fell asleep with a cookie on his chest, waking only when felt the bed move beside him. Ford was sitting on the edge, snorting in the dim lantern-light at the state of the other man. He reached over and plucked the cookie off of him, Stan groaning in protest.

“Hey, I was saving that for later.”

Ford crunched on it and wiped the crumbs from Stan’s shirt.

“You snooze you lose.”

Sleepily, Stan reached up to grab the remnant from Ford’s hand, but he was quickly and deftly swatted away.

“What’s with the cookie theft?” he grumbled, rolling onto his side.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said earlier. How holidays ‘weren’t my thing’.”

Stan squinted. “And what’s that got to do with waking me up from my drunken stupor?”

Ford finished off the cookie. Stan wondered if he’d gotten into his bourbon as well, as his eyes looked a little glassy. “Maybe...maybe in the past I had been a little too focused inwardly,” he reasoned quietly. “That’s not something I want for myself anymore, Stanley. Not when I have family who goes out of their way to send me gifts for the holidays.”

“Persistent knuckleheads,” Stan yawned. “You’d think being halfway across the world would stop them from tracking down a mailing address.”

“Yes, persistent.  And, of course, not when I have someone I can share the holidays with.”

Ah, he must be drunk. “Grammar, Ford,” he snorted, trying to do his best nerd impression. “Ending a sentence with a preposition.”

How many times had he been corrected in the same way? He didn’t even know what a preposition was.  But Ford found it funny and they both chuckled for a moment; another pleasant surprise for Stan.

After a moment of comfortable silence Ford leaned in, placing a hand on Stan’s chest to push him onto his back. “Hey now,” Stan murmured, but Ford continued to move closer.

“You have a sprinkle on your lip. It’s distracting,” Ford whispered, but he did more than just wipe it away. His lips touched Stan’s, tongue darting out to lick away the spot of sugar.

Stan moaned automatically in response, heart thumping wildly in his chest as Ford continued to hover his lips over his. How long had he wanted this? He hadn’t realized Ford had felt the same way. “Ford….”

Ford didn’t move an inch closer, but he didn’t pull away either. It was as though he was suddenly too shy to do anything but freeze right there.  

“Dammit Ford,” Stan groaned in frustration. He’d finally gotten the balls to kiss him, and now he was just going to sit there? He reached up to grab him by the gray patch in his hair, forcing him to meet his eyes. “Are you gonna keep kissing me, or what?”

That seemed to do it. Ford let out a strangled moan and pressed his lips against Stan’s, pushing his tongue into his mouth. He could taste the bourbon on his tongue, and Stan smiled and greedily deepened the kiss.

Ford fell onto him, limbs tangling in the small bed as they slid their bodies together. The box of cookies tipped over as Stan tried to roll Ford underneath him, but as the other man was a little more on the athletic side all he succeeded in doing was smashing the cookies into the bed. For a while they didn’t notice though, moans filling the room as their hands and mouths roamed over each other.

Stan wasn’t sure when they’d fallen asleep, but he woke a few hours later to the sight of Ford with cookie crumbs stuck to his bare back. He licked his finger and dragged it slowly down his spine, sucking the crumbs off with a smirk.

“Mfnph...Stanley...”

“Go back to sleep, Poindexter.”

He chuckled to himself and curled up behind him, too exhausted to care about the mess.

[vermillionsketcher]

stancest commission for @wannabeagrunklefan

[gobblechopstv]

[gravity-what]

Falling into freezing water isn’t ideal

For some reason my first attempt at posting this went wrong and the ‘read more’ didn’t work so I’m just going to re-post it

And now I finally get to post this!!

This is my secret Santa gift for @wannabeagrunklefan !!

WARNING: Stancest

Content is SFW and consists of Ford taking care of Stan when he falls into freezing water. Multiple times…

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[wannabeagrunklefan]

GASP! MY SECRET SANTA REVEALS THEMSELVES! :DDD

I LOVE this fic! It has such a fun, playful atmosphere and the way you write the Grunkles is fantastic! They have such lovely chemistry and I adore how they navigate all these different situations - the silly to the dangerous to the fun! You really had me worried when Stan was with that kelpie! I can’t blame Ford for his reaction at all. I would have probably barreled over there myself! XD; The ending was like the cherry on top of this whole wonderful fic! So sweet! I could feel my heart swell while reading it haha!

You have such a wonderful style, too! Do you know that while I was reading it, the entire time I was thinking, ‘This style is so wonderfully familiar! Why can’t I think of the author??’ XD; I felt awful! But I’m SO glad you posted, because now I can tell you how much I just adored my gift! Thank you so much for writing it for me! It was one of the best presents I received this year :) I look forward to seeing more of your wonderful writing in the future! <3

[knicks-knacks]

Temperature

Rating: M Summary: Stan is like a guitar string, wound tighter and tighter, as tight as it can go, so when Ford plays him, he only gets the highest of notes. Contains: massages, fingering, rimming, fucking. its just porn man W/C: 4,064 A/N: the thing i wrote 4 @secretguiltypleasurelove 4 the stancest secret santa :^))) idk enjoy

(AO3 Link)

Stan peeks his face around the side of the tree only to get a face full of cold snow. He flinches back behind the tree and immediately begins wiping it off and shaking it out of his hair. He hears distant whooping from the other side of the small clearing, and a mirthful laugh from the redhead right beside him.

“Told you not to.” Wendy remarks smugly as she crouches down to the ground, gathering snow in her gloved hands. Stan glares at her back. She stands, a well made snowball in her hands, and in a moment of pure playful spite, Stan shoves her out from the cover of their giant tree. Immediately, three snowballs pelt her side before she scrambles back behind it, shock all over her face. Stan lets out a full belly laugh that has him bent at the stomach and Wendy scoffs.

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[wannabeagrunklefan]

Stancest Secret Santa 2017 Gift

My gift to @cellard00rs​ for the Stancest Secret Santa event! I’ve always greatly admired and adored her writing and her fic This Divide Between You and I was my gateway into this fandom! :D So I was really excited to get the chance to give something back for all the amazing fic she’s shared with us! Thank you for being so inspirational and so awesome <3 I hope this silly thing gave you a chuckle ^^;

Operation: M.E.R.R.Y.

Stanford Pines had gotten used to periods of silence on the small boat he shared with his brother. There was only so much he and Stanley could talk about, after all, before things petered out and a companionable silence took its place. But this sudden, almost oppressive silence was unbearable in its totality. Ford could feel all eyes on him (those in the cabin with him, as well as the couple of pairs countries away) and swore that even the ocean itself had slowed its never-ending pulse to listen in and catch his reply.

On the screen before him, his great-niece’s devastated gaze seemed to bore into him, cutting his heart to the quick. He quickly groped for a decent excuse. “It – I mean- Mabel, sweetheart, you have to understand! I was on the run from Bill, evading capture in multiple dimensions! Holidays just…weren’t a priority.”

“For thirty years Grunkle Ford??” She demanded, scooting up closer to the camera until her face took up the entirety of the laptop screen. Her brother cried out in indignation from somewhere off screen and she shushed him hurriedly as she persisted. “You didn’t celebrate one winter holiday? Like, at all? No Christmas? Hanukkah? Winter Solstice? Nothing?”

Ford looked to Stan in a silent plea but his brother simply shrugged. “I’m not the one bone-headed enough to admit to never celebrating holidays for three decades to Mabel. This is all on you, knucklehead.”

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[reinstotheworld]

My secret Santa gave me the most excellent little fic for the Stancest holiday exchange!!! Whoever you are, THANK YOU!!!! It was so wonderful, and I hope you post it!

[surefire-tanis]

Do you ever start making something, then realize 4 hours later what you did.

[steampunch]

Tfw you don’t fit your pyjamas anymore but still manage to make it work.

Sketch uploaded to my Patreon during September.

Remember you can become a Patron today and get early access to all pieces before they go to Tumblr, just for as little as $5 per month!

[elligy]

My Stancest Secret Santa gift for @fingalsanteater! Prompt was first kisses and fun in the snow, which was adorable and I was more than happy to fill! Happy holidays!

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[stanowarb2]

HOLD ON TO ME

Art by @oldstupidtemplar for @stanowarb2; Day 45 of STANCESTIVAL

I can’t promise you anything / But I can tell you I’ll never leave…

[asexualgravityfalls-deactivated]

Secret Santa Gift

Here is my secret santa gift I made for the lovely @ricks-and-a-morty. They said I could post it as I really like how it turned out! I realize I never post anything so I figured I’d share some of my own art for the my favorite ship, the Stans. Here is for ricks-and-a-morty (and everyone else!). Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

*Caution this is NSFW*

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[allisonpregler]

*gets to the part i really started writing this fanfic for* me: *sternly* this better be good, me