She hears whispers that Kahn is coming to the station before Kira asks her over to her quarters for dinner. Everyone’s a huge gossip on Deep Space 9, and Quark looks out for her anyway. Ezri appreciates it. He’s really the only one who gets that she’s Dax, just like Jadzia was, and he treats her just like Jadzia would want him to: like Dax, with some regard to Ezri. Since the bar association organized, he’s been a little less morally reprehensible too. The dabo girls all got their money back–not that it makes it acceptable, but that is Deep Space Nine. You have to rub shoulders with the reprehensible.
Nerys chatters desperately as she serves her food, hasperat as always. Ezri smiles uncomfortable and waits. She has learned from Dax that she needs to let Nerys work her way to saying what bothers her, and then she will be as blunt as possible. She picks at her food, and thinks: Kah, I wonder what’s your face.
Nerys finally says, “You know, don’t you. You’re making that face Jadzia would, when she thought I was babbling.”
Ezri laughs. “Well, I wouldn’t say you’re babbling .” Nerys gives her a look and she looks down at her plate. “Yes, I-I do know.”
Nerys waits and watches Ezri think. Dax and Kahn have a bond that has lasted two lifetimes, though some of the impulsiveness comes from Curzon’s sense of adventure and Jadzia’s romanticism. Ezri Dax is more sensible, she thinks. She is nothing like Torias. She is a good influence on the Dax symbiont. She can handle seeing Lenara again. Of course, Jadzia thought the same: but Ezri has more and less to lose than Jadzia ever did. Dax says, “I think I can handle it.”
Kahn arrives on the station with her brother in tow. Dax is elsewhere, assigned to other duties. Besides, there is no reason for the station psychologist to greet a scientific mission. She keeps busy. Nerys had asked her to beam down to Bajor for a conference on the system’s Cardassian war orphans and integration even before they knew Kahn would be on the station, and it wouldn’t do to be unprepared. She reads the case notes on Rugal, who was requesting his Bajoran citizenship to be reinstated, when she hears her door chime.
Her heart leaps, but she steadies herself. “Come in,” she says foolishly, and regrets it. The door opens and it’s Lenara’s brother. Her face falls and he looks satisfied.
“Hi,” Ezri tries. He looks nothing like his sister.
“Dax,” he returns.
“Ezri Dax,” she smiles foolishly again. “Well, you probably know that. I’m the new host of the Dax symbiont. But you definitely know that already. Is there any reason why you’re here? Can I get you anything?” She gestures towards the replicator. “It’s gotten better since you were all last here on the station, Rom’s worked wonders. Redleaf tea?”
Lenara’s brother looks at her in disbelief. “No. That’s not necessary. I just want to say–she hasn’t changed her mind. She’s not going to sacrifice everything for you. So don’t even try it. We’re being more careful this time.”
Ezri’s smile freezes. “Oh. Well,” her tone turns steely “You don’t need to worry about that. Dax has managed integration on Deep Space Nine despite Jadzia’s death. I can handle seeing her. But are you sure she can handle seeing him?”
H scoffs, and leaves, and as the door closes, Ezri makes a rude gesture. She doesn’t understand how he can be related to someone has lovely as Lenara.
Ezri spends the next few days preparing for the conference. Despite her impulses, she does not deviate from her routine, and ignores the whispers of her friends and colleagues. She is Ezri Dax, and Ezri Dax’s legacy will not be the end of the Dax symbiont. She sees Kahn only once, a fleeting glance at Quark’s bar, on her way to the Holodeck. She watches her climb down the stairs from the balcony where they once had dinner with Julian, and she is struck by how middle-aged she looks. Lenara is still beautiful, of course, as elegant and gold and shimmering as always, but she has more life behind her. Their eyes meet and for a moment, and one moment only, Ezri wants to scream–and Kahn looks away and keeps walking. She is a beautiful woman, and she is Ezri’s mother’s age.
