A Bull Is Just Another Man
Bull... a common term used by cuckolds to dissociate, acknowledging they are just another person like you. You might like to believe it's just casual sex, and sometimes it may be. Your wife simply getting getting fucked by another man for your pleasure. It can often start that way.
However, he is a man, a true living human being, just like you and your wife, with emotions. When you were dissociating this, viewing him as a mere sex toy, you were helping your wife select a man superior to you, at least sexually, right? Perhaps someone with a larger physical presence, more sexual confidence, or a bigger cock.
You wanted to give your wife something she couldn't get from you: better sex, stronger orgasms, sexual freedom.
Human beings connect through kissing and sex, through fucking.
There's sexual chemistry between him and your wife; they're attracted to each other physically and emotionally. She enjoys spending time with him, listening to his stories, laughing with him. She finds pleasure in their seduction, the lust and passion of their relationship outside of your marriage. She desires him sexually and wants to spend more time with him, getting to know him better, going on dates, day trips to the beach, and even spending nights alone with him. He wants all of this too.
You can see it. There's nothing you can do now. Your wife is falling in love with him. You can't dissociate from it any longer. She's falling in love with another man.
You're a cuckold, though. It arouses you, doesn't it? You can't stop thinking about her having a boyfriend. Thinking about her telling him she loves him makes you cum. It's the ultimate cuckold fantasy, causing you both pleasure and pain. She likes how it arouses you too. Your arousal encourages her even more. She loves having a husband who understands her needs.
You don't want her to leave you, but you fantasize about it. Why? Because you love her so much, more than anything in the world. You simply want her to be as happy as possible. You hope she can have a boyfriend she loves, alongside you—a polyamorous cuckold marriage. Your feelings of inadequacy, the very feelings that make you a cuckold, also fuel this fantasy that arouses you. She leaving you for a better man.
Enjoy it. Embrace the journey. Trust she can love both of you the same and differently. If she ever does decide to leave, you'll support her happily and give your wife to another man.