This Is War

This Blog is Now an Archive

I decided to make all of my Kingdom Hearts blogs sideblogs under my Vanitas. Find Ikki’s new blog at ikki-masters!

This Blog is Now an Archive

I decided to make all of my Kingdom Hearts blogs sideblogs under my Vanitas. Find Ikki’s new blog at ikki-masters!

#anon #asks #memes #((KEEP EM COMING))#Anonymous

This Blog is Now an Archive

I decided to make all of my Kingdom Hearts blogs sideblogs under my Vanitas. Find Ikki’s new blog at ikki-masters!

This Blog is Now an Archive

I decided to make all of my Kingdom Hearts blogs sideblogs under my Vanitas. Find Ikki’s new blog at ikki-masters!

#ooc

swimminem

We didn’t get a chance

to be t e e n a g e r s ,

to be kids.

We were too busy

growing up too fast.

#about Ikki

☆+ Why don't you want to go home to the people who obviously care about you?

This hurt to answer, and Ikki wanted nothing more than to pull his hood up, turn around, and walk away. But a strange compulsion crept over him, loosening up his tongue, pushing him to tell the truth.

“...Whether they care about me or not is irrelevant. I’m not ready to face them yet. I’ve done terrible things...and I mean to do more. I’m not finished with my enemies yet. And until I find some peace...I won’t be able to look my family in the eye.”

roleplaymmemes

Send me ☆ + a question and my muse will have to answer it truthfully with absolute honesty

#((IT'S IKKI TIME #ARE YA READY KIDS))#memes

betweenthegoodandbad

Trauma changes you. The person you were before is gone. You have to reinvent yourself.

(via betweenthegoodandbad)

#about Ikki

kii-nam

Reblog if your Muse has a kill count of 5+

#about Ikki #((yeaaaaah ABOUT that....))

Ienzo couldn’t help a small smile as Ikki drank the water. He was glad that his friend was taking care of himself without argument-it would have been…frustrating if he’d had to fight Ikki on that. He understood pride, but that had its time and place, and that time and place was not here.

The question made him blink, then chuckle softly and shake his head. “Honestly? It was Sora, I think. Empathy is all well and good, as is understanding of your crimes, but without someone to teach you, niceness is hard to learn, I think. Sora’s…quite a good teacher, though.” He blinked, then smiled and nodded to the food. “Now eat. You need it after that.”

Something that looked sort of like a smile, sort of like a grimace, and sort of like sadness and regret eased its way onto Ikki’s face. Sora. Sora would be a good teacher for that sort of thing; he was so forgiving, so pure. Ikki owed him so much...but Sora was still scared of him. Sora hid his emotions well, but he couldn’t hide the smell of fear. That had been one of the many reasons why Ikki had decided to leave the Islands for good.

The Replica took a few bites of food, slow and contemplative. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet, and small. “You and Sora...are spending a lot of time together--?” Suddenly, Ikki decided he didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to hear about home. He didn’t want to talk about home. He’d made his decision.

He put down his fork and looked up at Ienzo, crystalline eyes grave and resolute.

“Ienzo, please do me a favor. Don’t tell anyone where I am.” He paused, and swallowed; his eyes drifted away from Ienzo’s face as shame crept over his Heart. “Not Sora, not Nami, or Xion...especially not Riku. Not even my parents. I’m not...” His voice grew softer, his eyes more pained. “...I’m not ready to face them yet.”

Ienzo held Ikki as he cried, not minding the way his coat was being soaked with tears. A soft hum began resonating in his chest, a song he’d learned in Notre Dame, and he waited out the storm of emotions as a rock for him to cling to.

When Ikki finally pulled away, Ienzo smiled and produced a handkerchief from his pocket. “Here.” He pressed it into Ikki’s hand, then pressed their foreheads together, eyes closed so Ikki wouldn’t feel uncomfortable and try to pull away. “You’re welcome. I’m glad you’re feeling better-if you need to talk, or just cry, I’ll be available. Promise.” He leaned forward carefully, then placed the food in Ikki’s lap. “Here, at least drink the water. It’ll help.”

He hadn’t expected Ienzo to press their foreheads together. The intimacy of the contact felt unfamiliar, strange--but he didn’t pull away. He closed his eyes, too, and just sat there, breathing. Human contact was what he needed right now. Human contact and empathy and care was what he’d been lacking in the past year; the only hands that had touched him were cold, unfeeling hands, or hands that hurt.

Ikki wiped his face with the hankerchief as Ienzo pulled away. It was just the right amount of contact, not too much; Ikki wasn’t overwhelmed by it. He felt enormously better, and it showed in the relaxed slump of his shoulders. Ikki took the food with a grateful nod, and immediately began guzzling the water; half the glass disappeared in one breath.

“Thank you.” He didn’t mean it any less than the last time he’d said it. Ikki picked up his fork and took a scoop of vegetables, but hesitated, staring at the plate. He cast a sidelong glance at Ienzo.

“...How did you get so nice?” What he meant was, how was anybody so nice.

desideriumofadream

Muse Hobbies Meme

Bold which hobbies your muse has.

#((dorkness))#about Ikki

fluxveined-blog

Ｓｏｍｅｔｉｍｅｓ I ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ W A N T to be ᏴΕТTＥR

ѕσмєтιмєѕ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʙᴇ ｐｕｔｂａｃｋｔｏｇｅｔｈｅｒ

Sometimes ι ƒιη∂ ιт ʜᴀʀᴅ ᴛᴏ BᎬLIEVЕ

There’s ｓｏｍｅｏｎｅｅｌｓｅ

ω н σ ¢ σ υ ℓ ∂ в є Just as MЕЅᏕED UР as ｍ̦̫̜̩̦ｅ͇̻̗̱̗͙͔

#about Ikki

Of all the reactions Ienzo had expected, sudden blind panic had not been one of them. He blinked dumbly for a moment, then hastily kicked off his shoes and started scooting back, dragging Ikki along and shifting him as best he could so that the taller male was leaning on his chest and seated across his lap.

“I’m here because Yen wanted my help. I don’t think he knew there was only one survivor, but I saved him. Darius is going to be ok-nothing more than a scar. I’m all right, Ikki, and so are you. You’re safe here-it’s safe to cry if you need to.” He started petting Ikki’s hair, trying to soothe his friend without knowing the true cause of his distress. “It’s ok. I’ve got you, and I’m not going to let anyone hurt you.”

Not Liash, not Alliance, not Heartless, not Nobodies-anything that tried to take him away from Ikki or Ikki away from him would probably end up permanently frozen in ice right now.

Ikki was going to be safe in his arms.

Ikki moved readily with Ienzo as he scooted back. He’d done his best not to show emotion, but now he was past the point of no return. He needed this, and even in his addled state, he recognized that. He needed Ienzo. So he curled against him, clung to him, and cried.

Darius. Right; right. The man who had called for help. Darius was the reason why the Alliance reinforcements had come. He’d saved Ikki’s life with that; there was no way the Replica would have been able to handle six thousand Liash on his own. He was a powerhouse, but he was only one person. Ikki was glad he’d survived. Now, he might have a chance to properly thank the man.

Yen. Of course it was him. Even though Ikki had only just met him, it was already obvious that Yen was the kind of man that people were naturally drawn to. Ikki had a feeling he hadn’t seen the last of the General.

No, he definitely hadn’t. He couldn’t go home. There was pain in his Heart, pain he let out in tears on Ienzo’s shoulder, pain that became easier to bear as Ienzo continued to pet his hair, to let him know that he wasn’t alone, to let him know that he was safe. But his Heart also had anger. More anger than could be contained.

He wasn’t finished with the Liash yet.

It was a good while before Ikki’s sobs began to ease back into normal breaths. He reached a point where he was in control of himself again, and decided that he couldn’t cry forever. He had to let Ienzo eat, too; it wasn’t fair to him.

Slowly, Ikki’s grip on Ienzo’s coat lessened, and with a sniff, he pulled himself away. Shame turned his gaze downward, and he wiped his face on the sleeve of his borrowed hoodie. His voice was weak when he tried to speak, so broken that it made him wince, but he plowed on anyway.

“I...I think I’ll be okay.” A pause. Crystalline eyes stayed away from Ienzo’s face. “...Thank you.” Those two words were the most sincere he’d ever spoken.

Ienzo was just glad that Ikki had any emotion on his face. The blankness reminded him too much of when Ikki-or, well, his version of Ikki, at any rate-had first been created. No heart, no soul, just a blank slate for Vexen to work into whatever image Xemnas so chose.

Shoving that thought firmly away, Ienzo walked over to the bed and sat down. After setting the food on Ikki’s other side, he pulled his friend close, pressing the silver-haired head to rest on his shoulder. A faint, gentle trickle of a Cure began feeding into Ikki, hopefully easing any aches and pains that the fight had brought on.

“…I’m really, really glad to see you, Ikki.”

#uncoveredillusions #liash conflict #ptsd tw #blood tw #death tw

Part of Ikki told him not to relax. Part of him said that this was dangerous, because if he relaxed, he might show emotion, and nothing good came from showing emotion. They’d grill him endlessly with questions, or torture him for sport, or drug him some more. They’d--

No. No, that was wrong. They were all dead. He was safe, here with the Infinite Alliance and Ienzo. They were dead.

Dead...dead faces, everywhere dead faces, white walls and dead faces, white walls and blood splatter and dead faces, and alarms blaring, ringing, ringing, ringing...

A choked sound echoed out of Ikki. He gripped onto the sides of Ienzo’s coat with trembling hands and pressed his face further into his shoulder.

“No,” he choked, muffled. “No, no, no no no no...”

He was about to cry, and it gripped him with panic. The panic loosened the tears, letting them flow freely on Ienzo’s coat, and the panic shook him from the core outwards; he trembled so hard that he could swear his bones were rattling. His breathing became erratic, and his grip tightened.

“No, no, no. No. No.” The litany became desperate, tear-choked keens. He managed to suck in enough breath to ask him the only other thing that mattered.

“Why...why are you here?”

Ienzo smiled slightly as Ikki called for him to come in, then gently pushed the door open with his free hand. Almost immediately, he stopped, a small, worried frown crossing his face at his friend’s position.

…The Liash had him, remember? They must have trained him.

An intense wave of fury at the thought that those…monsters…had had Ikki for any length of time washed through him, but he quashed the feeling before it could show on his face and returned to smiling. “Hey. I brought you some food. …And maybe a hug, if you want it?”

Ienzo sure did-both for the horror they’d both seen today and for the simple joy that Ikki was alive.

Someting about Ienzo made Ikki relax a little--he couldn’t know if it was his sweet smile, or the offer of food, or the offer of a hug. His shoulders slumped, just enough to barely be visible, and his face softened. It didn’t soften to a smile, or to relief, or to any discernible emotion, really. It just became...tired.

“...Yeah.” His eyes drifted away from Ienzo’s face, eyes falling to half-mast and staring at nothing. “Yeah, food’s good.”

Something like a shudder passed over Ikki, but it seemed to come from his soul, not his body. He closed his eyes for a moment, as if assaulted by a wave of nausea. No. He wasn’t going to break down. Not now. Not in front of Ienzo. Not...not ever.

“And...yeah. A hug wouldn’t suck.”

Ienzo had stayed at Darius’s side until he was sure that the man was fully healed, which had meant nearly depleting the supply of Ethers he had brought and pressing an Elixir into the man’s hands just in case. But Darius would live, and that one life made it possible for Ienzo to walk out of Z’ar instead of curl into a ball and burst into tears.

Now, though, he had another self-appointed job-find Ikki, and make sure he was okay. He’d washed his hands, freeing the blood from his fingernails, then gathered up a small amount of food and asked the nearest officer where he could find the silver-haired Fighter. Fortunately, the man was both amicable and knowledgeable, and he found his friend without any difficulty and knocked on the door.

“Ikki? May I come in?”

Oh, shit.

So he hadn’t been imagining things on Z’ar. Ienzo really was there. How the hell had he...and why...Well, Ikki could always ask him, anyway.

But he didn’t want to see him. He didn’t want Ienzo to see him. He didn’t want Ienzo to find out what he’d done. He didn’t want to talk about what had happened to him. Where he’d been. He didn’t want to talk about why Riku and his parents had received forged letters saying that Ikki didn’t ever want to see them again. It would be better if he just...stayed gone.

But what was he going to do, tell Ienzo to fuck off? In a way, this was the rescue he’d been dreaming about for the past year. It was another soul he knew, a friendly face.

“Yeah, come in.” He sat up on the bed and just looked at Ienzo as he walked in, face blank, waiting for him to speak. Like the Liash had trained him to do.