when the rest of me is dead @rotting-bones-will-sing - Tumblr Blog

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hello. we're Rufus. this is our nonhuman blog. we use it/its, hy/hym, and ze/hir pronouns. we do not use they/them, and will not hesitate to block you for misgendering us. our main blog is @dolphinrostrums. if you are vehemently pro-recovery and think people should always strive to "recover" no matter what, you will not like us, and we will not like you.

🦴 autistic, schizophrenic, and paranoid. we're a spiritual multi-origins mediple hivemind that has polyfragmented DID. occasionally, Snail (sentry, double bookkeeper) will pop its head in to speak, usually to reassure that we're safe.

🦴 we call ourselves a werecanid or werecaniform when searching for specificity, and werebeast more broadly; however we only "have" (are under) a human veil, not a human form. we reject all notions of humanity for ourselves wholeheartedly.

🦴 our main forms are Vancouver Island sea wolf (Canis lupus crassodon), eastern coyote (Canis latrans var), and dire wolf (Aenocyon dirus). other frequent forms are various dog breeds (Canis familiaris), wolverine (Gulo gulo), and red wolf (Canis rufus).

🦴 we are genetically a pacific white-sided dolphin; you can see more of this on our main blog.

🦴 we are physically disabled and intersex and traumatized. we are also very queer in general. these all play into how we experience our nonhumanity.

🐟 we will trigger warn for things such as gore, animal death, and reality checking. we will not tag our own experiences as unreality. do not ask us to.

🐟 do not reality check us. it will earn you an instant block. it will not "help" us. this is non-negotiable, and this is your only warning.

🐟 we have Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD) (alongside NPD and AsPD), and we have severe paranoia around being seen as fraudulent regardless of how real our experiences are to us. as such, we tend to avoid maintagging posts and can take time to answer asks. we do not experience guilt, remorse, or empathy, rarely compassion, and selectively experience sympathy.

we block: queer exclusionists, people against endogenic plurality (including against created & spiritual plurality), and people who assume that tastes in fiction are indicative of real life morals. this is not an exhaustive list, but if you're blocked (esp from our main) and you don't know why, chances are it's because of the above. we are very trigger happy with the block button.

[all media ids are in the alt text of respective media]

#intro post #yips from yonder

btw for people who don't follow our main, our (new) weredog blog is @deaddogsdocry. warning that we often talk about child abuse that may be seen as extreme over there, simply because that's the situation in which our being a weredog (and thus, a werecaniform in general) arose. it's never in graphic detail, but it is there.

#yips from yonder

our dinner tonight feels very much like a fancy homemade dinner for dogs. it's 100% tailored more to human tastes (mostly because Spicy and the veggies) but it's very much like. if you just leave out some of the stuff we're adding, you could throw it in a dog bowl and most people wouldn't bat an eye.

now i'm just wishing we had our "human dog treats" (frozen bananas covered in peanut butter and dark chocolate) lol :>

(i'm hoping that our relative lack of discomfort with the situation is indicative of some progress towards acceptance of being a dog. or maybe this is completely temporary! who knows. i'm just gonna enjoy it while it lasts and also try to trigger a dog shift. we feel pretty "doggish" right now anyway)

#yips from yonder

it would be nice if we weren't so afraid of being a dog. it would be nice, at the very least, if that fear didn't carry over to me, the new host. alas!

i kind of want to see if i can purposefully trigger a dog shift so i can, like, actually do the whole "getting used to being a dog and associating being a dog with good things instead of bad things" thing, but also that should probably wait for a day where we aren't planning to babysit. since like. while we can purposefully trigger a shift, we can't make it stop, and can't guarantee how long it'll continue <.<

#yips from yonder

having very easily triggered shifts is... something. just have to see a particular picture or a discussion or just think about it or see a full moon or or or and it comes out. usually just in part, but occasionally in full or close to it, like right now.

we're very much a canid right now. it's kind of fluid between wolf/coyote/dog, it seems to change based on what we look at, but it's one of those three in particular. our paws are formed, and we have a tail and ears and fur. our muzzle is partially formed, partially pushed out, but our tongue is fully formed and is too big for our mouth now, pushing against our incisors and canines (and slightly against our pre-molars). our proportions have changed--our hypermobility allows us to sit "like a human", with our hind legs crossed, but we can feel the change in the bones and musculature and ligature and flesh. we can feel our fur underneath our sweatpants.

we still remember when we saw our ears--our wolfish ears--in our shadow. no humans can seem to see what we are, at least none that we've met, but we can see it. at least we have that comfort. there's something magic to it, we're certain--how much is it because humans simply don't want to see, don't want to believe we exist? if they wanted to, were willing to, would they see us?

#yips from yonder

been very doggish all day, ever since seeing a particular video. but now, we're much more wolf.

a dolphin that is a werewolf sounds absurd, but it's unfortunately just what our life is.

#yips from yonder

zip-bomb-dog

I think ☝️ that all canine therians should get a Treat today. Without even doing a Sit or Stay. It's Treat Day.

rodent-rendezvous

FUCK i missed treat day DAMMIT

zip-bomb-dog

No such thing! Any day that you see this is treat day :>

occidental-wolf

TREAT DAY ROUND TWO YEAAAAAA

#reblog

NEED TO STOP SAYING THINGS SO DEFINITIVELY!!

agh. we'll see how we feel in the morning. could be northwest coast coyote. or could be eastern coyote. or could all be gone in the morning and go back to "just" dolphin and go back to ignoring this blog for ages again because we're focusing on dolphin.

could also be that we were a northwest coyote and now we're turning into an eastern coyote again. head in paws beak in flippers etc etc. we don't know!! we don't know!! we like to think we know but we really really don't and we're just tired and scared and trying to make sense of shit because uncertainty is the bane of our existence and if we can't even get a handle on what our own body is then what the hell do we even have at all??

#yips from yonder #growling #tw vent

are a coyote. probably northwest coast coyote. almost definitely northwest coast coyote, but is hard to find good information.

overwhelmed and upset. can feel coyote tail and dolphin tail at same time. disorienting. wish could be either dolphin or werecaniform. not both.

have our muzzle. paws partial transform. hindlegs transform. spine... partial transform? big big ears too. hard to drink things out of human receptacles (cans, cups, mugs, etc) right.

want to curl up in a hole. disconcerting. supposed to be a dolphin, and yet...

#yips from yonder #growling #tw vent

had a coywolf transformation earlier today, heading home from swimming. or, either coywolf or sea wolf. one of the two. it was hard to figure out. it may have even been a dog, not one of the ones we're used to--but because of the circumstances in which we transformed, we wonder if it was what we were originally intended to be. we're hoping it wasn't that. we're trying not to think about it.

we do, to a degree, miss when we thought we were only a werecaniform. when we could take joy in being a canine--wolf or coyote specifically. even before we fully understood why we are the way we are, being a dog put us ill at-ease. our hackles were always raised.

the entire time while transformed (which, granted, didn't last that long), we weren't able to enjoy it--we were simply wishing it could have been a dolphin transformation instead.

#yips from yonder #growling #tw vent

we've been so focused on dolphin stuff lately that we temporarily forgot that we are still a werecanid as well--and right now, a sea wolf. we still have the urge to howl and growl and whine, and even if it was forced on us to some capacity, our flippers have still become paws. it's what we are, and it's a large part of who we've been.

we love being a dolphin--but we still love being a wolf, too. no matter the circumstances. even if we were to return to the ocean, we would still love the coasts, the rivers, the forests--we'd still love the idea of having a muzzle and paws and packmates, even with our beak and flippers and our pod.

we've been exploring being a dolphin really in-depth, because it feels like a very sudden shift in our self conception. it feels like it's the only thing that matters right now, but that's not true. we're still a wolf, still physically a beast of the land, even if we should be of the water. and being a sea wolf is still deeply comforting--having fur and paws is much preferable to a human facade while our dolphin genetics remain unexpressed. just because werecanid is what humans turned us into doesn't mean it has to be something we ignore or push away or hate. it shouldn't mean that, really. we'll have to figure out a way to reconcile Being Both without accidentally and inadvertently ignoring one or the other, because they're both important to us.

#yips from yonder

always-remain-deactivated202506

Gentle and friendly reminder that not every label is catered to specifically you, and you/your experiences only.

Heavy /not being rude/ for the title.

It may be a hard pill to swallow, but some labels are meant to include certain demographics you want to stay away from, or dislike, and that is okay. Some labels are going to cater to a widespread of demographics that you may not even like, or care to interact with that side of it. Another reminder that many labels are umbrella terms for specific, different, experiences, even if it's not explicitly stated. No two beings will be identical in every way. The beauty in this community, is that things can change. Things are fluid. Identity is fluid. Biology and physicality is fluid. It isn't always static.

"Physical nonhuman" means many, many things for many different nonhumans. Some physical nonhumans are only physically nonhuman, but mentally human. Some physical nonhumans aren't fully nonhuman. Some physical nonhumans are fully nonhuman in absolutely every way. Some physical nonhumans weren't always nonhuman. Some physical nonhumans have traits that others consider nonhuman. Some physical nonhumans are physically nonhuman to cope. Some physical nonhumans experience delusions that allow for them to be physically nonhuman. Some physical nonhumans are physically nonhuman due to transitioning. Some physical nonhumans are born physically nonhuman. Some physical nonhumans can shift between human and nonhuman. Some physical nonhumans are nonhuman in a non-literal sense, and reclaim their body as physically nonhuman.

Physical nonhuman does NOT just mean the last sentence. It isn't always metaphorical for some folks. For some creatures, it's absolutely literal, and is to be treated as such. If you experience physical nonhuman in a non-literal sense, I think that's actually really cool, and I recognize you as physically nonhuman, regardless! However, it is not an excuse to push out those who literally are physically nonhuman. Sanism doesn't fix anything. It doesn't make you look any better.

"Yeah, I identify as physically nonhuman, but I don't literally think I am. That's when it's clinical zoanthropy."

"I'm a holothere, and all holotheres know they are biologically human."

"I'm physically nonhuman, but I think we shouldn't enable delusions by calling clinical zoanthropes and other delusional folks in the community nonhuman. They aren't actually nonhuman if they have a delusion."

"P-shifters don't count under the label physical nonhumans because p-shifting isn't real."

"Most physical nonhumans actually know they're human. They just physically identify as nonhuman non-literally."

"Physical nonhumans don't experience delusions regarding their physicality."

^ Examples of what it can look like to throw out a good portion physical nonhumans from their own community. Communities made for them. Forcefully assigning labels onto folks who are only presenting as themselves is very weird, in my opinion. Don't come into communities expecting them to cater specifically to you, and then pushing away existing community members for the sake of "reclaiming" a label to look more "sane".

Making blanket statements like these do more harm than good. There's a reason why physical nonhumans, especially on this site, are getting angrier and louder about the tireless disrespect, even indirect disrespect. It's disrespectful to come into a community, choose to learn absolutely nothing about said community, and then proceed to push out anyone you think doesn't fit your narrative of what physical nonhumanity should look like. It's disgusting.

Holothere, especially on Reddit, began losing its meaning because self-proclaimed holotheres would use the label, and then go on to claim that biological nonhumans aren't actually included. Girl, are you the coiner of the term? Did the coiner tell you that? Did you even read the Carrd? The Carrd that's literally on the front page, and one of the top search results on Google when you simply type in "holothere"? Did you? Did you look into the community and read and take time to digest our experiences, and accept that every holothere is different? Words cannot describe how *frustrating* it was to see a Reddit post that discussed the term, only for other holotheres to kick ME, a holothere, out of my own community. The term was literally made for me in mind, too? Like wtaf.

Again, there is NOTHING WRONG with being figuratively physically nonhuman. I can see why someone would do this for various reasons, and I think you guys count. This isn't directly JUST concerning these nonhumans who identify that way, but this is definitely directed towards nonhumans who decide to push each other out for the sake of sanism, and as a result of ableism. Let's face it, denying a delusional individual's right to autonomy of the usage of a label, or usage of something that makes them comfortable in their delusions is ableism. Pushing out delusional folks because they are experiencing something you consider not real is ableism.

Absolutely nobody is forcing you to interact with delusional nonhumans. If you decide not to, that's cool, but don't erase them because you don't like what they have to say. Don't erase physical shifters and automatically discredit them just because you don't believe in physical shifting. Don't armchair diagnose and mislabel literal physical nonhumans just because you don't think it's possible outside of a metaphorical/figurative experience. That's where the issue lies. It isn't about how you experience your identity, but folks with this type of physical identity do tend to be very exclusive and close-minded when it comes to physical nonhumanity. It very well seems to be in a way to make themselves look better. It's easier for most non-physical nonhumans to digest in most spaces.

Please, for the love of everything, DO NOT try to push someone out of a community that is literally meant with them in mind, simply because they seem "weird", "too intense", "delusional", or "scary". We wouldn't be so scary if you would listen, and kill the idea that we need to latch onto the idea of "being normal" in order for us to be taken seriously.

#reblog

sagesnthymes

i know i have been pretty silent about the things happening in the community the last days. im just very frustrated and sad, and as language doesnt come easy to me i just cant seem to write my thoughts about it properly. i wanted to say that im very disappointed but not surprised.

the althuman community isnt very strong, and id argue there isnt much community at the first place. everyone is always at each others throat whether about another beings identity is valid, if someone is faking, the same 5 silly animal posts :333!!, physical nonhumans are dangerous!!!!, physical nonhumans are valid <3(→very obviously only talking about p-nonhumans just to put their stance at the issue that is our existence), random animal packer discourse post, demonizing non-contact paraphiles...

all that then they come to our spaces, water down the meaning and use our labels,???

its more an absolutely insincere and unhealthy space to start and partake in discourse and arguments where you take sides than a community that actively learns, engages, and supports each other.

i am thankful to have met my mutuals, however it came to be. i am happy with the space i carved in my blog for myself and them and mostly no longer will actively engage in the larger altrhuman community. because aside from all ive mentioned before it just... doesn't add anything to me as a person. they dont teach, learn, grow. just argue. and i dont see the reason to be active in a space that cant make me more than i am.

i will keep posting about my experiences, and reblog things that can help me be more (more than i am, more knowledgable than i am, more animal than i already am...).

i didnt lose anything. they just wont have me anymore.

#reblog

on the ninth (specifying since we were going to say "yesterday night" since, because we have not gone to bed yet, we still feel like it is the tenth even though it's past midnight here), we discovered (and upon further reflection, re-discovered) that we're a striped dolphin. genetically, biologically, we are a striped dolphin. we are still a werecanid.

i think? we're going to try and convert this blog from being our general (physical) nonhumanity blog to just our werecanid blog, at least for the time being. we probably won't talk much about dolphin stuff here, unless we do. we'll probably keep dolphin stuff to our main, unless we don't. we'll see! but for now, that's where we are. we're still figuring it out a little bit, and we were only able to get started in the first place because we got an extremely rare moment of quiet to focus where our attention wasn't taken by other things (chores, cleaning the body, trying to sleep, etc). we feel like we've caught a fresh scent of prey, and now we need to chase it down and find it and devour it to feel right and "whole".

anyways. tl;dr we discovered we're a striped dolphin, we're not technically different but things feel different, but this blog probably won't contain any dolphin stuff unless we change our mind, and you'll have to go to our main to see us talk in-depth about dolphin stuff (unless we change our mind)

#yips from yonder

a-minke-whales-tale

I was going to make a long-detailed essay about the discourse, but honestly, I really am just so tired of it all. I am tired of us being a source of discussion and debate. I am tired of everyone and anyone needing to have a “take” on our existence and our community even if they never post in our tags otherwise. I do not want to turn this into discourse and just vent my experiences which is why it has no title or word count.

My experience with therianthropy has been a really quite isolated one. I have clinical zoanthropy, and because of that I was never really welcomed into normal therian spaces, more of a tolerated interloper so long as I understood that my experience was not real in the same way theirs was and I did all the double bookkeeping and other dances they demanded.

Therianthropy is a pretty wide range of experiences, though the acceptable range is often quite narrow. I was often told that therians are a sort of Human+, and while that leaves room for plenty of people, it also excludes very many. There are those of use whose experiences are much less human with an animal soul or of psychological reasons but is far more visceral and literal.

When I came to tumblr I was not expecting to find others like me, it was mostly a way for me to log my process on constructing this whale suit. But I did find others like me. If you have not been so horrendously isolated and rejected by what is supposed to be your own community, it is hard to explain how freeing and comforting it is to find others and community. I imagine to some extent; a lot of therians can relate to this being rejected from wider society and finding therian spaces.

However, since then, I am feeling more and more pushed out of the spaces we curated for ourselves. It has happened with physical nonhuman, it has happened with holothere (not that I personally connected to that term), people have in the past at least appeared to appropriate zoanthrope and clinical zoanthrope, and it is happening now with transspecies. Most of the people using physical nonhuman even six months ago were talking about visceral physical experiences, but now much of the tag and much of the discussion is focused purely on this philosophical notion of ‘I identify as [X], therefore I am [X], therefore my body is that of [X]’.

This has happened for a lot of terms and subcommunities. Therians seem to have this overly entitled attitude and demanding constantly to be included in communities and practices and that they cater to them. Although this discussion is on how therians appropriate terms and take over spaces, this sense of entitlement extends beyond them to continued use of slurs towards intersex people to describe their type or the use of a spirit-creature from a number of northern American indigenous cultures despite both those groups asking repeatedly for people to stop. It also extends to the creation and demand of the use of the term alterhuman, or even of the term therian itself demanding others submit to those terms even if at the same time making them unwelcome.

There is this attempt of overinclusion to make sure that anyone can feel represented by a term. Physical nonhuman has gone from having a wide range of meanings to being dominated entirely by the philosophical argument. Even as we can celebrate physical nonhumans being more accepted in the community, looking beyond a surface level still shows the same biases. People with “delusions” that is that our animality is literal and not of metaphor were pushed out of the community – it is hardly a month since discussions of a zoanthrope exodus were filling our tags. Similar has happened with the term holothere. There was even a thing recently of methylation as figurative.

This is happening again with transspecies. The tag even a month ago focused far more on physical experiences and processes or plans to transition (at least for the parts that weren’t porn bots or radqueer tagspam). There was a trend recently of species transition plans. At first it was cool to see different ideas people had, but it very quickly turned into consumption and shopping lists. Since then, the tag has been different – less physical and more metaphor and I and others are starting to feel pushed out of our community again.

[Therians,] Not every term has to be for you. Not every community has to cater to you. Not every space has to include you or your experience. In these sorts of spaces, therians, you -are- the hegemonic power. You find a new term, appropriate it, and effectively colonise the community, demand definitions change to meet you, and then throw ablism back at us until we feel we have to leave.

It is not wrong for us to want our own communities and spaces to discuss our experiences that are unique to us. My experience as a zoanthrope and as someone who is transspecies is not something I can simply take off. My struggle to properly interact and imitate human behaviour. My crutches and gait from a body that does not fully understand what legs are cannot be taken off. The gloves I cover my hands in so I do not see my human skin are something I can literally remove, but metaphorically I cannot when I do literally remove my gloves (either because of heat or need for function) I need to be careful not to look at my hands where I would see the human flesh (though this has improved over the past year). My schizophrenia which the humans use to explain how I experience the world is not something I can take off. It defines how I exist, how I interact with the humans around me, what care I can receive, and even what opportunities I have. This in particular also affects how and where I can interact with the therian community and how they in turn treat me. There is nothing metaphorical about my experiences, and my hopes to return to the water are very literal.

The reality for myself and others is that we cannot relate as fully to others whose identity is less literal. I am very glad for the people I have met here in particular Sonar and Sigr, I am glad to no longer be alone. Still as I look at the feed and my tags, I am watching as my community is again taken over. I am reminded over and over that to many therians we will never really be equal or welcome and we will never have our spaces. They will constantly be taken over as therians seek terms they think will make their experience sound more “real” or unique or special while further subjugating marginalised sections of their own community.

I am watching seemingly in real time spaces that were once special for me and welcoming to those like me be taken over and destroyed. The freedom and community I once felt is being destroyed by entitled therians demanding every space. And I am left now feeling once again isolated on here except for my kind friends in the personal messages.

With how things are going this is really only going to end one way. Eventually our communities will go from semi-open and public, to private and closed. We will have to secure ourselves and our communities to be allowed to exist as anything beyond lunatics and delusional. We will also likely need to bring back the harsh grilling people used to experience so the people that join our communities are genuine and will not try to appropriate and dominate our spaces. And unfortunately, this means that inevitably, people will be hurt. Some will be hurt in the way I was - a crushing isolation and understanding you are not really welcome anywhere and unable to find others like yourself. And others will be hurt by bad actors who use the new situation for power and control as people commonly reference with P-shifters. If things continue as they do, this -is- an inevitable outcome. We have already been forced out of many tags, and others have sustained harassment and have left the site, some forums have even already started to be made, there are discussions of making a new term though that seems only a temporary measure until that too is taken from us. Just let us alone.

#reblog

orcinusorka

I am sick and I am tired of being forcibly shoved out of the spaces built by and for those like me.

I do not even care for insane allegations of things like "cultism", and I wish to say it clearly: leave our spaces alone.

How much entitlement does one need to have in order to first whine about our mere existence, then infiltrate the spaces we create for ourselves after being shunned and berated by you and your community?

'clinical zoanthropy' is not a mere identity label one can use as they please. It is a term with a history of extreme ableism and borderline violence towards those like me, and it is a term we are forced to use not only to protect ourselves, but also to identify each other among the crowd. It is not about a metaphorical sense of physical therianthropy, it is a medical term used to enact violence onto us by the psych community, humanity and society itself. It was never something one could use as they please, and I'm really sad that I have to be so harsh over this, but it has to be said.

"why do you use this term if you claim you are not delusional?" Because I am forced to. If I don't, I get thrown into hell itself and forced to endure years of treatment to yet again mold me into the perfect, mindless citizen, all because I say "I am animal"—which is the damn truth. I have to use this term in order to be taken seriously as a person, in order to live as a person with even the minimal rights I can be given, and to not immediately be clocked as a madman (and even that fails).

And on top of that, even among this, it is still a term that helps us find each other. That helps us find a community. Due to how uncommon, "niche" it is, we easily can find each other among the general community, therefore find support and comfort... So, when a word this unused, exclusive to a very particular sort of a group suddenly goes boom, becomes mainstream and no longer exclusive to just us—we become unable to really find each other again. Therefore, our only line of support gets cut short.

The therian community has to accept one thing—not everything is for you. Just like not every closed practice is meant to be shared, that too applies here. You do not have to use a stronger term to be taken seriously, you are not less valid because you are a therian rather than a "zoanthrope". Both describe different experiences, neither are less valid than the other. You have to accept this, and get over this goddamned inferiority complex.

I really hate engaging in online discourse, but for once, this is genuinely important to me. I do not want my community to be infiltrated and sanitized just like many others were in the past.

#reblog

shiftedspecies-deactivated20250

working on a long essay that will be posted to my wordpress.

time to word vomit one last time and fuckig move on with my life. lol

shiftedspecies-deactivated20250

ok here it is.

if u act a fool in the comments i will assume you fell victim to a brain eating parasite.

#reblog

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when the rest of me is dead