I do not have assumptions but I want to hear more about John! How does he cope with being socially isolated? Does he internalize his issues and blame himself, or lash out at other’s when things go wrong?
In a way, he's comfortable with it and what he knows. It's what he defaults to, or else he feels too consumed. He fears inevitably exposing what's left of him that's unknown to others, or absorbing too much of others until he can't discern what's Him or Not. Owning himself first and foremost and having parts of himself that are still private, unseen and untouched, and uninfluenced are important to him. Isolation is both one of his biggest safety mechanisms and existential crisis that severs him from connections. Whether he even wants connection or not is complicated as well. Most of the time John feels too violated within his own skin to the point it kills most if not all desire desire to meaningfully interact with others.
Ironically, he copes with more isolation by absorbing it onto his ego and sense of being. John is the “I don’t need anyone” type, rejecting before he can rejected, and his entire ego is centered around invulnerability. If he were to readily / easily accept connection, or seek it out, in his eyes I believe he would view that as exposing weakness or a tenderness he’s spent his entire life convincing others (and especially himself) that he doesn’t have. Why would he lower his guard for a world that made it clear from his infancy that someone like him isn’t welcome, or meant to be alive? Instead he fills that white noise with his black smithing, strongman competitions, fighting competitions, jigsaw puzzles, substance abuse and getting himself involved in stupid bullshit. I do think he experiences more loneliness he’s aware of or lets on though, like that low monotonous hum of a bathroom fan your brain eventually tunes out.
But there’s one facet of his life that is probably his healthiest and sweetest way of dealing with things, and the rare tenderness he willingly shows, which is acting as a midwife for parents with small children and infants within his family. However, it does upholster his ego of invulnerability, strength and dominance, because he gets to be the scary uncle to chase off threats and put people in their place (Sometimes he takes it too far in typical John fashion). In his job as a familial midwife, John is treated with more humanity than he’s usually offered, and finds some sort of connection from a very low risk source. Also gives meaning to his role as a “guardian” or “weapon” that isn’t just acting as the subdued attack dog for his mother or losing control of his anger, which leads me to the next answer.
John lashes out, he almost always lashes out. Anger is one of the ways John copes with Everything in general honestly. It's the first descriptor to pop into the mind of people who know him. It's the first thing the world greeted him with and he answered back tenfold. I think the only other person who can outmatch his anger is his brother Adam. And John has rarely been the one to take blame for anything when things go wrong, despite how hopeless he can feel within himself and his own problems John is still a grandiose and egotistical man. His mother constantly protecting him from consequence and cleaning up after his mistakes didn’t help. He struggles to view himself as a consequential component in the outcome of things or his actions, it’s almost always the weakness of another person or circumstance.
That being said, there are narratives about himself that John has internalized which I feel differs from internalizing an action or situation gone wrong. John believes he’s a defective piece of shit who mostly sows hatred / resentment, and that does construct a man who thinks nothing but isolation is truly possible for him. Who can blame him, when childhood and life experiences continue to feed that perspective about himself and prove it right?
