Okay neeru. listen to me. I haven't spoken to you in months. I'm changing that now. Let's break out of this cycle okay? you're gonna feel better, for which all you have to do is listen to me. I love you, you're not a bad person, you've just gotten used to seeing yourself a certain way, like you're weak and just depressed? doesn't matter if that's true or not, enough of trying to find out if that's true and hiding how you're feeling from yourself. Let's do this a different way this time and see if this makes things a little better okay? I'm here for you, I'm your rock, stop hiding yourself from me. I see you.
The last week, has been overwhelming. Work, friends, studies, that guy, instagram. It's a lot. Remember what the therapist told you? the first step to making yourself feel better is sleeping properly. You need to start by just picking a few things that you want to correct. One step at a time. Sleep, food, studies. That's good enough right now. It's not too late, don't panic about studying. You've deleted instagram now na? take a deeeeep breathe, you can get back on it whenever you feel like, no pressure, no guilt.
Right now, you're waiting for hot water. Take your bath, clean up your room, and sleep for 2 hours. Get up, have dinner, spend time with amma, try and do just 1 lecture, and just sleep. Kal ka kal dekhlenge okay? sote wakht you can text him and explain a little. Tell him you need time to fix your system the next couple of days, because you're little overwhelmed. I love you, now go :)
p.s. let's take a break from smoking yeah?