WELCOME

© SKAIANET SYSTEMS INCORPORATED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

[run-sburb]

.run sburb

Booting up SBURB BETA Version ██

WELCOME to SBURB

© SKAIANET SYSTEMS INCORPORATED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

[START] [PROPOSE] [HELP]

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.==>

You throw open your MAGIC CHEST, making sure to ponder over every item.

Your collected goods include: ONE (1) COPY of Colonel Sassacre's Daunting Text of Magical Frivolity and Practical Japery, ONE (1) COPY of Harry Anderson: Wise Guy from the Street to the Screen, ONE (1) ILLUSION SWORD, ONE (1) BEAGLEPUSS, ONE (1) WIZARD'S HAT, ONE (1) HANDKERCHIEF ROPE, and SEVERAL (~) FAKE BLOOD CAPSULES.

You used to have SMOKE TABLETS but they were since USED UP in BATTLE.

[PROPOSE]

[START]

[run-sburb]

John: explore magic chest

.john explore magic chest

Now is as good of a time as ever to refresh your memory of the contents of your assemblage.

[.==>]

[START]

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.==>

Oops.

[.==>]

[START]

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.==>

[.==>]

[START]

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.==>

[.==>]

[START]

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.==>

[.==>]

[START]

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.throw furby out the window

.throw furby out window

You consider for a moment. The small, brightly colored freak of nature soaring through the open air, his trajectory inevitably leading him to the ground below. Your wide open window is right there. Beckoning for the jester to come on through. Is it worth it? the satisfaction of hurling this menace out to where it wouldn't bother you anymore? It would no doubt hurt your father's feelings to reject his passions so outright.

[.==>]

[START]

[run-sburb]

.==>

Jesus fucking Christ how does this thing still have batteries?

[.throw furby out window]

[START]

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.investigate shadowy corner

.investigate shadowy corner

You pull out the CURSED EFFIGY to your Dad's WARPED MIND. It is an utter manifestation of his CONCERNING OBSESSION with clowns, and his MANY ATTEMPTS to get you to like them as well. A relatively NICE GIFT in theory utterly ruined by the fact it happens to be YET ANOTHER CLOWN clogging up your periphery. You could go the rest of your MISERABLE LIFE without ever seeing another FUCKING CLOWN and you’d probably be happier for it. Not even to mention THE NOISE this thing makes.

[.==>]

[START]

[run-sburb]

.john put a blue hoodie on the skeleton

.john put blue hoodie on skeleton

You gently place your BLUE HOODIE on the LIFE-SIZE PLASTIC SKELETON. You're sure that this is HUMOROUS. Somehow.

[.investigate shadowy corner]

[START]

[run-sburb]

.take jacket

.take jacket

You TAKE a JACKET off of a hanger, adding it to your CAPTCHALOUGE QUEUESTACK. This EJECTS the BUNNY from the QUEUESTACK. It LAUNCHES around your room in a COMICAL MANNER. Looks like you will need to MANAGE your INVENTORY better.

[.john put blue hoodie on skeleton]

[START]

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.retrieve arms

.retrieve arms

You swiftly CAPTCHALOUGE the ARMS.

[.take jacket]

[START]

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.Take a look in your closet.

.look in closet

You take a LOOK in your closet. Evidently, this is where you hang up your BUTTON-UPS and JACKETS as any dapper young man would. You also keep your PANTS on top of your BOOKSHELF, where you house a VARIETY of BOOKS and KNIK-KNACKS.

There's also a LIFESIZE PLASTIC SKELETON, because it's funny.

[.retrieve arms]

[START]

[run-sburb]

John: *captchalogue notecard*

.john captchalogue notecard

You CAPTCHALOUGE the NOTECARD into the same QUEUESTACK that the bunny is in. You never know when you'll need fatherly words of encouragement. Probably NEVER.

[.look in closet]

[START]

[run-sburb]

John *examine notecard*

.john examine notecard

It's another EMBARASSING NOTE from your DAD. He likes to leave these around the house in both CONSPICUS and BIZZARE locations. He’s always baking you FRESH TREATS or expressing his APPRECIATION FOR YOU. It’s incredibly embarrassing and honestly rather annoying. He always wants to ENGAGE IN YOUR INTERESTS and SPEND TIME WITH YOU. What is his problem?

[.john captchalouge notecard]

[START]

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john: take bunny

.john take bunny

You TAKE the bunny, CAPTCHALOGUING it into your SYLLADEX. You barely understand what this means.

[.john examine notecard]

[START]