Life As We Know It

☠ Ⓡⓨⓓⓔⓡ Ⓛⓨⓝⓝ☠N/A (coming soon) "Maybe I'm a man and maybe you're the only woman, Who could ever help me, Baby won't you help me understand"

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde‌:

Kitty give a little smile at his words before closing her eyes when he kissed her forehead. Her body felt so calm and at ease in that moment. It was a great feeling knowing that Ryder wasn’t just going to leave her alone. Most guys from her past would of in a heart beat. The blonde followed him to the bed.

When she laid down, she rested her head on his chest and her arm wrapped across his body. The warmth from their bodies that had disappeared by walking to the bed started to resurface again. Kitty stayed silent for a few minutes before moving her hand to his chest and gently dragging her finger around his shirt, making random little doodles, still staying silent. Kitty looked up at Ryder, her hand still moving in different directions on his shirt, trying to fight the urge to kiss him. “Being vulnerable like this..it’s never been easy for me…yet for some reason it’s so easy being vulnerable with you.” she said softly, staying quiet again before biting her lip. “and thank you for staying with me, especially whenyou probably have better things to do with your night.” 

A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he listened to her. The pad of his thumb softly circling her shoulder. If he was being really honest with himself there was no place he would rather be right now then right here with her. That thought alone kind of scared him because Ryder knew exactly what that meant. He stayed silent for a moment, the man enjoying the warmth and closeness he felt with her. It was taking everything in him to not lean down and press a soft kiss to her lips.

Ryder looked down at her as he exhaled softly. “I know it hasn’t been easy for you” Ryder said quietly. “But just know there’s nothing you can’t tell me. I’m not like those other assholes you’ve been with. You can talk to me about anything” he assured her before pressing a soft kiss to her head. “It may shock you but there’s no place else I’d rather be”.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde‌:

Kitty closed her eyes and took in his forehead kiss. Who knew even that would give her the shivers. When Ryder wrapped his arms around her, Kitty softly smiled up at him before bringing her hands to his chest and gently playing with his shirt. “You have no idea how much that means to me.” she said softly above a whisper, looking up at him, finding his eyes. “Knowing that I’m not alone.” she sniffled. “and that I have someone helping me and keeping me safe and relaxed. I haven’t had that in awhile but it feels so good knowing that I have it back. I have a rock again.” she whispered.

The blonde, biting her lip, lost her stare long enough to stare at his lips for a few minutes before going back to his eyes. Her heart was racing a mile a minute but tried to keep it unnoticeable. One of her hands gently went to cup his cheek. “I like the sound of that.” She whispered, not wanting to leave his warm embrace.“Stay with me? Please?” she asked before shaking her head. “I don’t want to be alone, especially not tonight.”

Feeling her hand cupping his cheek, Ryder swallowed, his heart racing at her touch. He nodded in response, a small smile tugging his lips as he tried to make his heart racing unnoticeable. “I wasn’t planning to leave you alone. Not after tonight” he replied, biting down on his lower lip. He pressed his lips to her forehead, kissing her forehead softly. “Come on....” Ryder whispered as he led her over to the bed. 

He laid down on the bed and scooted over, holding his arm for her. After she had laid down beside him, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer, her head resting on his chest. “You’re not alone. I got you...” Ryder whispered.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde‌:

Kitty looked at Ryder until he placed this thumbs under her eyes again, then she closed them. This was the first time in a long time that she was so open. The last time she was so vulnerable was with Jake and Marley. She was tired of holding everything in and hiding behind the wall that she had built up.

She shook her head. “I don’t want too.” she whispered. Kitty didn’t know if he was going to respond to her question. She was interested in hearing his answer. “Really?” she asked softly, surprised by his answer. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about how great it was honestly.” she admitted. “It left me wanting more too.” Kitty was never one to be truly be honest and open about her feelings but right now, she didn’t care. The blonde bit her lip and moved some hair behind her ears before she locked her eyes with Ryder again.

Ryder nodded in response. After fighting with himself about that night, he found himself not being able to ignore just what he felt about that night anymore. He didn’t want to either. He bit his lower lip, a small smile tugging the corner of his lips, surprised by Kitty’s answer but nevertheless happy he wasn’t the only one that felt something between them that night.

He bought his hand up to her face, gently caressing her cheek. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her forehead. As much as he wanted to kiss her, it wasn’t something they should be doing especially after the night Kitty had. “I guess this is something we’re going to have to figure out together then” he smiled, his arms wrapping protectively around her smaller frame. “I don’t know what it means but I do know we’re going to be fine. I got you, Kit...” Ryder assured her.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty was a little worried that Ryder was just going to blow the whole thing over, she was shocked when he had actually mentioned that night as well. A little smile came to her face. Her first it what seemed like forever. Kitty tightened her grip a bit when he tightened his “I think it did too.” she admitted a little bit above a whisper. “What did it mean for you?” she finally asked, her thoughts still running a mile a minute. 

When Ryder changed their position and they became face to face, Kitty still kept a gentle hold on his arms. She listened to his words before nodding. “I couldn’t do this alone.” she whispered. She sniffled as a few more tears kept falling down her cheek. Kitty close her eyes and took a deep breath before looking back at Ryder. “Thank you.” she sniffled again, not even caring how vulnerable she was getting with him at this point. She moved one of her hands from his arm to the back of his neck, gently giving it a rub as her eyes darted back to his. 

That was one question Ryder didn’t know how to answer. He didn’t know what the hell it actually meant. All he knew he wanted it to happen again. It scared him because he’s simply never been with the same woman twice at least not since his girlfriend he had in college. Ever since that night he had done everything in his power to forget it happened but his mind simply wasn’t letting that happen.

Ryder ran the pad of his thumbs under her eyes wiping her tears away. His eyes locked with hers. “You’re not going to have to” he muttered. Ryder bit down on his lower lip, still trying to figure out how to even respond to her question before he finally broke his silence on that night. “And I don’t know. I mean it was great. It’s scary because it only left me wanting more” he admitted quietly.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty just stood in silence. Her mind was going non stop. She ignored everything around her as she tried to quiet her thoughts, but it was no use. The blonde didn’t even hear her bedroom door or anyone coming in. When she felt Ryder’s arms around her, she didn’t hesitant to lean back, taking in the comfort. Her hands resting gently over his arms. She didn’t have the energy to fight him anymore. Kitty released a shaky sigh. 

She ignored his first set of words. “It’s hard to get over things when I have so much regret and guilt built up inside and instead of doing what I should of done which was let everything out when I needed too, I kept everything in or I just scratched the surface of my problems instead of really letting them out and now I’m paying for it.” she said softly before shaking her head. “I’m not going to leave. You and Ava are all I have left in my life even if it scares the hell out of me and sometimes even brings up hard times and I want to be here.” her voice getting more quiet everything she spoke. She took another sigh and closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying Ryder arms around her. She through back to their night together and how even after a horrible situation, he made her feel safe and content. “I haven’t felt this safe and this much comfort since that night.” she cleared her throat quietly. “Sorry.” she forgot that that agreed not to speak of their night together. 

Ryder listened to Kitty. All the words hitting him like a ton of bricks. He had expected her to fight him but the words were nothing but a shock to him especially the last words that left her lips. Something about her last words that made a small smile start to form at the corner of his lips. He swallowed, his eyes closing as his mind went back to their night together. Ryder would honestly be lying if he didn’t feel the same way she had and it scared the hell out of him even more so after knowing she felt the same way. What did this mean? All he knew was he was pretty sure he was going to find out now.

“It’s okay” Ryder finally broke his silence. His embrace tightening around her. He leaned down pressing a kiss to her head. “I’d be lying if I said that night didn’t mean anything because it did” he admitted quietly. His embrace slowly loosened around the blonde, he bought his hands up to her face, cupping her face gently as he ran the pads of his thumbs under her eyes wiping the tears away. “Everything is going to be okay. We’ll get through this together” he assured her, his voice soft, caring. “I promise”.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty didn’t know what to think about Ryder’s words. Apart of her didn’t care about what he said but then the other part was kind of hoping he would surprise her and demand he help fix whatever she was going through. She was kind of surprised a lecture didn’t come from him either. All she knew in the moment was that she wanted to go back to the house and do nothing. The blonde stayed silent during the whole car ride home. She wasn’t in the mood to talk.

When they reached the house, Kitty managed to get inside and up the stairs. She got into her room and changed into her sexy silk mini dress, hoping it could possibly boost her confidence some, even if she was the only person to see herself in the clothing. She took a few deep breaths, hoping the coffee would set in some more. The blonde looked at herself in the mirror, teare falling down her cheek. She didnt recognize herself and not even her sexy sleepwear was making her feel better. Once the room got silent, Kitty grabbed her silk robe and throw it over she shoulders before walking to her window and stepped out onto her little balcony. She need some more of light chilly air. After a few minutes, Kitty let the more tears fal. This wasn’t her. She didn’t know how to fix herself. Kitty had never felt so broken and she felt like she had officially hit a new low and it was the worse feeling in the world. What was worse was that she didn’t have her best friend there to help pick up the pieces.

After paying the babysitter and checking on sleeping Ava, Ryder closed the child’s door quietly. A deep breath leaving his lips. What the hell had his life came to. He was guardian of a child that wasn’t even his. Now he had to put up with Kitty and her problems. His life was filled with big changes and drama. It all called for a drink but he couldn’t even do that. He now had to be the responsible one. The responsible one? Ryder Lynn? Those two just didn’t go well together. These were his friends final wishes and he had to see it through. He’d have to make this work. One way or another.

Ryder’s eyes moved down to the door at the end of the hall. Kitty’s room. A look of concern, worry on his face. A part of him, a tiny part didn’t really give a damn because he had it with her and her drama but there was a big part of him that was worried about her. Especially after tonight. He cursed himself silently, the need to at least check on her ran through his mind. Ryder hated that part of himself that grew to care for Kitty. He quietly made his way down the hallway to her room. He stood outside the door, his ear pressed to the door as he could hear her soft sobs.  “Fuck it....” he muttered to himself as he swung the door open, making his presence. Ryder was going to do what he should of done on the way home after the bar. Seeing her room empty he made his way over to her balcony, seeing her standing there crying.

“I don’t care what you say. You’re not leaving this easy. I’m going to help you through this whether you want my help or not. Do you understand me” Ryder spoke in a demanding tone. He sighed heavily as he came up to her from behind and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to him. “We’re going through this together. I’m not letting you give up this easily. Ava needs you here........I..I need you here”. His voice became softer as he spoke. The last sentence he spoke coming out as a whisper.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty finished up her coffee before pushing her cup aside. Every possible feeling she could have, she was dealing with. She felt everything from sad to angry and everything in between. Kitty didn’t know what to do. She could drink all she wanted but she knew it would never makes her problems go away, no matter how much she wanted them too.

“That’s surprising, you usually always have one ready to go.” she sassed back. “Yeah you guys will and it will be because I won’t be around. Like I said, I’m clearly not cut out for any of this.” Kitty took a deep breath, holding back any more emotions she had. “Fine, whatever. I just want to go back to the house.” she said.

“Well I’m not going to waste my breath on you anymore. If that’s what you believe than I’m not going to try to change your mind. Not like I could anyway, that’s impossible” Ryder sassed right back as he picked up his keys from the counter. A little taken back that she was actually going to let him take her home without any trouble. Ryder pulled some money out of his wallet and paid for the drinks Kitty had consumed in her time there before sliding his wallet back into his pocket.

Ryder had his own doubts about parenting Ava but those problems definitely had to take a backseat for now or at least until Kitty came to her senses and fought these demons/thoughts she was battling. Ryder just wished he knew how to get her there but how could he when he didn’t even know how to get there himself. He made his way out of the bar establishment walking beside the blonde, his eyes glancing at her every few seconds.  

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty took another big sip of her coffee before glaring at Ryder. “You don’t think I know that.” The blonde rolled her eyes. She didn’t care if Ryder got mad at her, she was going through a lot and the she didn’t have any to work things out with. She was stuck with Ryder, who didn’t understand anything she was feeling. Did he understand losing their friends? Yeah but her sadness went deeper than that and no matter how she tried to explain to him, he wouldn’t understand. 

She bit her her tongue in annoyance while she sat there listening to Ryder go on and on. “You don’t get to decide what I do. If I want to get up and leave, I will and you won’t stop me.” she said angry. “If I feel like Ava will be better off with out me then that’s my choice and it’s because I think it’s what’s best for her.” Kitty never liked sitting there and having someone tell her what to do. While Kitty had truly thought of leaving Ava, deep down she couldn’t do that because she loved the little girl so much. “Besides without me out of the way, you can raise how ever you want and you don’t have to deal with me, which I’m sure you would prefer that.” Kitty gave him another glare. “And you can save any pathetic lecture you have memorized because I don’t want to hear any of it.”

Ryder chose to sit there and not say anything after that. This was a no win situation. He couldn’t say the right thing no matter what he said and she was right he couldn’t stop her from doing what she wanted to do. If she wanted to sign up her rights and go back to her old life he wasn’t going to stop her. Ryder bought his soda glass up to his lips and took another gulp before setting his glass back down, his finger tracing along the edges of the glass.

“I’m not gonna give you a lecture anymore. If that’s what you really want then so be it” Ryder finally spoke. “Ava and I will be okay without you”. Ryder picked up his drink and downed the rest of his soda before setting the glass down on the bar. “I’m your ride home. The bartender called me to come and get you so let’s go” he said as he turned in his seat and slid of the stool and to his feet.

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

The blonde continued to sit at the bar alone with her thoughts. No matter how hard she tried, her mind wouldn’t shut up. As the bar continued to faded out more, Kitty took another slip of her drink which was almost gone at this point. After a few more minutes of silence, Kitty managed to see a guy coming towards her before sitting down next to her. She was it was Ryder but she chose to ignore him. She finished her drink instead.

Kitty kept quiet for a minute. “No.” she answered, still not looking at Ryder. “Because sadly no matter how much I drink, my thoughts don’t turn off.” She grabbed her coffee and took some sips, not even caring that is was coffee instead of another drink. “I don’t know why you’re here. I’m fine and you and clearly you can’t see that  you and Ava are better off without me. I should have never been named co-guardian of Ava and we both know that, so why don’t you just go home to her and I’ll go back to my apartment later ” 

"You know what” Ryder spoke up turning on the bar stool to face the blonde. He was getting beyond irritated with Kitty now. He was tired of this pity party. He could understand where she was coming from. Nearly the same thing was going through his mind. He questioned constantly why Marley and Jake named him co-guardian of Ava. Why him of all people? Why? “Rule one” he placed his arm around the blonde “Drinking doesn’t make your forget. You gotta eat a little brownies with a little somethin’ somethin’ or smoke somethin’ to do that” he revealed quietly.

He turned back facing the bar, taking a big gulp of his soda before setting the glass down. “And do you honestly think I’m going to let you give up that easy and let you leave” he asked arching his brow as he looked over at the blonde. “You and I are in this for the long haul, baby, and you ain’t leaving this all in my lap. Marley and Jake wanted BOTH of us to take care of her and we are damn well going to respect their wishes” Ryder exclaimed. 

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty sat at the bar, talking another gulp of her drink as she looked around the room. The past couple of months has been the worst of Kitty’s life. She lost her baby, lost her best friends and now was living with Ryder of all people, trying to raise a child, which she was having doubt on even being involved in. It was to much to fast. She felt alone and helpless.

The blonde was the last of little group to still be out. They all had boyfriends, husbands and families to get home to while Kitty..she had Ryder and Ava. While she loved her god daughter, Kitty wasn’t cut out to be a mother figure in the little girl’s life. She looked around at all the careless people still out in the bar. While the crowd went down over the hours, they all seemed so happy and free. Kitty wanted that. But with everything going on in her head, it was hard to be happy. When she finished her drink, she asked bartender for another drink, lucky for her, he knew she was going through a hard time. Over the course of a few years, Kitty and the bartender become friends and at times a free therapist for the blonde. Kitty usually didn’t care how much she drank when she went to the particular bar because at the end of the night, she knew the guy before the bar would get her home safety.

Hearing his phone ring, Ryder scooped up Ava who was sitting in his lap and walked over to his phone answering the unknown caller. After a few minutes on the phone, Ryder dialed another to Ava's regular babysitter, one of teenagers who lived down the block. This was getting out of hand with Kitty now. He understood where she was coming from but this was not a way to cope with losing Marley and Jake.

After the babysitter arrived, Ryder gave her a list of rules and contact information before kissing Ava on the cheek and handing her over to the babysitter. He arrived at the bar twenty minutes later. A soft sigh left his lips as he entered the establishment and spotted Kitty over at the bar clearly drunk. Ryder took a deep breath before making his way over and sitting on the stool beside her. He signaled the bartender and ordered a coffee for Kitty and a soda for himself. "Feeling better now"?

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

Last Friday Night (TGIF) | 003

FRIDAY NIGHT! It was Friday night of all nights and Ryder found himself sitting in front of the TV on the couch in the family room with the small girl beside him while the two of them watched cartoons. While the tragic accident that took his best friend’s happened weeks before he was still finding it hard to adjust to his new life, sharing a house with Kitty and raising their best friend’s daughter together. 

Now here he was with another milestone, staying in on a Friday night of all night watching cartoons with a one year old. This was definitely an all time low but he sadly wasn’t minding it at all. He had the house to himself with Kitty being out with her girlfriends and Ava wasn’t exactly bad company and cartoon repeats of Spongebob Squarepants were actually growing on him. Ryder bought the slice of pizza that was placed on a plate on his lap and took a bite as he watched the TV with Ava while she drank her bottle.

[kittycat--wilde]

Making Thing Work II 002

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty kept letting the tears fall as she heard Ryder talk. “They shouldn’t have trusted us.” the blonde said softly. Kitty sniffled before taking a couple sips of her wine. She was tired. She was tired of feeling the way she was and she was tired of having all this doubt in herself. She was Kitty Wilde and Wilde’s were never like this. She felt weak. 

After taking the last couple of sips, Kitty sighed. “Look Ryder I really don’t want to talk about this anymore tonight. All I want is silence and comfort. Are you able to do that for me? I’m willing to swallow any pride I have for tonight if you are too? I don’t think I’m asking for to much.” Kitty laid he head back against the couch, trying to relax.

Ryder bit down on his lower lip. He hated seeing the blonde so emotional and hurt like she was right now, he found himself wanting to make her feel better. If she was willing to swallow any pride she had left, so could he.  A heavy sigh left Ryder’s lips before he reached over taking the glass from Kitty and setting it on the table.

He motioned for her to move towards him as he wrapped his arm around her. The two laying there on the couch, his fingers gently brushing through her blonde strands as they laid there in complete silence.

[kittycat--wilde]

Making Thing Work II 002

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty shook her head. “But why? We can’t do this..” she sighed. “I can’t do this. I’m not a mother. I’m not even a mother figure.” she shook her head at this words. “I can’t. I can’t do this. I’m going to screw her up and then she’ll grow up hating me.” Kitty kept shaking her head. “I can’t.” the blonde kept repeating herself before a more tears starting falling down her cheek.

After a few mins of going back and fourth with herself, Kitty grabbed a glass and filled it with wine before going back to the couch. “I can’t do this Ryder.” she said again before curling up into a blanket and on the couch. She stayed silent as she let more tears fall. Her mind thinking about the worst of things. “I just can’t.” she said whispered before going silent again.

Ryder watched as she paced across the room in the middle of her breakdown before finally making her way over to the couch, a glass of wine in hand as she continued crying. Ryder honestly had no clue how to deal with this or even comfort the woman because what he had been saying earlier wasn’t working so it definitely wasn’t going to work now.

Ryder exhaled deeply as he grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and taking a long quick drink. Letting a sigh of relief as he felt the chilled liquid going down his throat. He made his way over to the couch sitting down beside her. “You can....we can” Ryder declared. “Jake and Marley wouldn’t of left us in charge if they didn’t think we could do it. They trusted us”. They honestly had more faith in them than Ryder did particularly in himself. “And if she grows up hating us than so be it. How many times did we say we hated our mom and dads while growing up. It’s normal” he shrugged.

[kittycat--wilde]

Making Thing Work II 002

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

The blonde kept eating her food as she listened to Ryder. “That’s not exactly true because I never had problems opening up to Jake and Marley. They never judged me. They were always there for me, even when I didn’t deserve it.” Kitty started moving her food around. She was starting to get less hungry.

“That’s another problem, I don’t need someone looking out for me. I can handle myself. I’ve been doing fine, for the most part, for years. Her mind running a mile a minute.” Kitty stayed silent for a minute before finally throwing her fork down in her food. “It’s not fair.” she said angry. “This isn’t how my life is suppose to be. I was suppose to be something big but now I’m this young woman taking care of my best friends daughter.” she stood up and starting pacing a little bit. “It’s just…not fair.” she took a deep breath. Kitty hated what had been happening to her since Jake and Marley passed. She had become more sad and angry and more open with her feelings. She didn’t like it. “What where they thinking leaving me partly in charge of Ava…I can’t do this.” she said, more to herself.

Ryder sighed heavily, rubbing a hand over his face. He could relate to where she was coming from, why she was reacting like this. He was asking himself the same question. What the hell were Marley and Jake thinking leaving him in charge of their child. He was not father material. Hell he didn’t even know if he wanted kids. Ryder watched her pace across the room. remaining quiet as he listened to her having a nervous breakdown about their situation.

“I guess they just trusted us over all our other friends” Ryder guessed, shrugging his shoulders. He exhaled deeply, pushing his plate away. His appetite not really there anymore. “You just have to calm down, Kitty. It’ll be fine. Just stop stressing so much. We just have to take this day by day. We got this, don’t worry. We can take care of her” he assured her. 

[kittycat--wilde]

Making Thing Work II 002

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty sighed as she listened to Ryder. “Why.” she said softly. “Why did I open up to you? I don’t show this side of me to many. Marley was pretty much the only exception. Jake too but not as much as Marley. It took a long time to warm up to them, especially Marley but when I did..Marley became my person.” she sighed again. “And yet here I am, opening myself to you as if you were Marley. You of all people and I don’t get it. I also don’y get why talking to you was so easy.””

The blonde took a couple more bites of her food. “You don’t get it Ryder. This is not who I am. I don’t cry, I don’t vent, I don’t do any of that. I only did it with Marley. Before Marley, I dealt with problems on my own. I wasn’t like this yet here I am, talking about my stupid problems that I should even be caring about because it’s all done with and no matter how badly I want things to change, I know it’s not going too.”

“You know I read that.....” Ryder narrowed his eyes at Kitty. “And yes I read, no smart ass remarks” he warned before proceeding to tell her. “It’s easier to open up to a stranger or someone you hate than someone you love. Actually I think it’s one of Marley’s old magazines” he motioned to the where there were some magazines on a side table near the couch. 

Ryder took a couple bites of his food before looking over at her. “You may have done that then. In the past but you better get used to it. As much as you and I both hate to admit we only have each other now and as long as we’re living under one roof and taking care of Ava, your problems are mine and vice versa” he stated with a soft sigh. “If we’re gonna do this, raise Ava, live under one roof, we gotta have to look out for each other”.

[kittycat--wilde]

Making Thing Work II 002

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty sighed as the downstairs became silent. She nudged into the pillow before curling up into the blanket more. She had reached a heavy low in her life. Everything that had been happening to her in the recent months were finally coming to light and finally being told, even if she didn’t want them too. But this is how Kitty was. She’d hold everything inside, her trying to be tough and all, until she couldn’t take it anymore. Countless nights of secreting crying herself to sleep and she didn’t understand why she did this to herself. Why she still, after all this time, found it hard to let people truly in. 

After some time of watching TV with it on silent, Kitty heard Ryder come downstairs for their food. When he questioned her about coming to join him, the blonde stayed silent and stood up before walking to the kitchen, with the blanket still wrapped around her. She grabbed some food before sitting on the counter stools and began eating away. 

Ryder exhaled deeply as he fixed his own plate. The brunette staying quiet as he did so. He honestly didn’t know what to say to Kitty at this point. He bought the bottle of beer up to his lips as he took a sip before setting it back down. Ryder took a few bites of his food before he finally looked over at the blonde in front of him before he found himself looking away.

“Look....” Ryder muttered, finally breaking the silence in the room. “As much as we hate each other, I just......I’m here if you wanna talk or anything. You don’t have to keep things bottled up. Don’t choke or anything but what the Kitty I seen earlier wasn’t so bad and she definitely wasn’t weak either”.

[kittycat--wilde]

Making Thing Work II 002

[ryder-lynnnn-blog]

kittycat--wilde:

Kitty shook her head. “It’s not that easy being vulnerable you know. I don’t like it and whoever I end up, is going to have to understand an accept that. I don’t like crying or showing emotion.” Now Kitty was getting angry. “It’s not easy to let people in. I mean look how long it took me to open up and accept Jake and Marley. It’s not just something that happens over night Ryder.” 

The blonde watched the guy walk away. She finished her drink and and walked back into the living room before laying down on the coach and wrapping herself up in blanket. Sometimes Kitty hated the way she was. Sometimes she wished she could open up more and not be so cold hearted, but it was just how she was. It was easier that way. It was easier to be alone and to not let anyone in. 

Ryder went into the main bedroom and closed the door behind him. A heavy sigh leaving his lips. Kitty left him so frustrated. Whoever the hell told her crying, emotions were for the weak deserved to have their ass kicked. Sure it wasn’t easy but it also wasn’t hard to start letting people in and showing the vulnerable side of yourself, Ryder of all people knew that. He opened the balcony doors and walked onto the balcony of the master bedroom and rested his arms on the railing as he look out to the beautiful scenery right before him.

The sun began to come down over the town as the night was welcomed. Ryder stood there for a matter of minutes until he felt himself calm enough to go back downstairs. Getting a change of clothes, opting to wear a pair of shorts and shirt, he made his way back downstairs grabbing a beer from the fridge. Finally their food was here, Ryder thought to himself as he set his beer down and made his way to the door. After paying for their food and tipping the driver, he set the food on the counter and got plates down from the cupboard. “Gonna join me....” he asked quietly looking over at the blonde.