tw: ed

She/her ~don’t report just block please~

[sadbulmix]

{stats}

Height: 5’11

Sw: 194.4 - July 2, 2024

Cw: 194.4 {bmi: 27.1}

Gw1 ~ 170 {bmi: 23.7}

Gw2 ~ 160 {bmi: 22.3}

Gw3 ~ 150 {bmi: 20.9}

Gw4 ~ 140 {bmi: 19.5}

Gw5 ~ 130 {bmi: 18.1}

(24 lbs to go)

* Not pro anything*

[classymia]

The fear and paranoia that swells up inside me when asking the fast food worker for diet soda and hoping that what I actually get 😟

[sadbulmix]

Guess who’s back

After “recovery” and a bad breakup I have gained 70lbs, YES 70….I’m completely disgusted and horrified at who I am now and I hate how I’ve let myself go, so back down the rabbit hole I go. I don’t need “well wishes” or “hope you recover” I would never wish this on anyone else and I know it’s unhealthy and bad, but it’s what I want for myself right now. I’ll be blunt about it, I know it’s wrong and Ed’s aren’t fun or pretty but it’s where I’m at right now and that’s just how it is.

[deflatedbunny]

thinspo but make it ✨nessa barret✨

[caress-me-please]

I think we can all agree that physical hunger is way easier to ignore than psychological hunger

[sadbulmix]

I’ve gained 10 pounds…no one says anything about it but I make it a point to point it out I think as a way of shame..but every time I do people say “yea but it looks good on you” or “I didn’t even notice” it makes it hard because I want to be okay with it but I’m not

[sadbulmix]

I was “attempting recovery” but I’m back

I gained 10lbs but found out I grew an inch soo yay I guess

I’m getting back on track next gw:120

[sadbulmix]

Guys I need help

I’m stuck right now at 117-120 and I just can’t break it. My sister was here like a week and a half ago and I was completely off track and ate so much but didn’t purge.

I gained like 4 real pounds in that week and I’ve lost the most of it but I was 117 before and now Im stuck at 119.

Plus purgeing is no hard all of a sudden..like before she came it was super easy and told barely any effort now i can’t get everything anymore and have to use laxatives to help my guilt but I see the change. I look bloated and just ugh disgusting

So yea please help

[sadbulmix]

I gained 4lbs I’m just so depressed right now

[sadbulmix]

At this point.. I really don’t give a fuck

[sadbulmix]

Feeling small in leggings and a crew neck>>>

Best feeling, very proud of myself rn😊

[sadbulmix]

I’m so close to my Gw2 and I’m really excited to be under 120, like for my height that’s “low”….but it’s so weird because I really don’t see myself as “skinny” like I just see myself as “average” whatever that means lol idk man eating disorders can be so isolating but it could be worse so 🤷‍♀️

[sadbulmix]

I just tried on a pair of size 00 American eagle jeans..and they fit🤭 I’m so proud but at the same time I’m skeptical

[sadbulmix]

Dad: “im like 80% sure you throw up you food”

Me: *knowing damn well I do but acting offended*

[sadbulmix]

I’m about to get back to a strict diet!

Only 10 pounds to my next goal, I’m ready and motivated

[sadbulmix]

My birthday is on Monday and I start school Wednesday..I’m so scared I’m gonna gain weight before school, I just have to buckle down and be strict tomorrow then I will let myself have the dinner (only if we eat as a family) and a little bit of cake on my actual birthday but skip breakfast/ lunch…then Tuesday I will fast for as long as possible and take laxatives so by Wednesday I will be completely fresh and new!

Sunday (my sister comes): fast until 3, allowed dinner and small snack during movie

Monday (my B-day): no dinner or lunch, allowed dinner and a little birthday cake

Tuesday: Fast for as long as I can, take laxatives

Wednesday (First day of school): Will be fresh and new!! Back to old school routine

[sadbulmix]

My biggest flex?

Having an ED but not being fat phobic