My Only Social Media That Matters

Listen, you’re here. I’m here. You don’t need to know anything else

[liirker-at-thresholds]

I really like how the scientology speedrunning trend is developing, in this clip we see that the participants are

Not deterred by the closed door

Working as a group

Protecting their identities

Inflicting material costs to the institution via property destruction

Getting away at the end

These ideas were not all here from the beginning. They are genuinely gaining experience that can be applied elsewhere

[liirker-at-thresholds]

The church of scientology is on tumblr and they are sending me anon asks telling me that they can't even commit to reporting a post

[gaycop]

Jigsaw as a scientologist

[cosmosredshift7]

[warduke]

[theabigailthorn]

bae: babe did you go to the orgy?

me, levitating:

[vee-dmsr]

[vampiredoriangray]

fuck my gay life. pharmacist asked for my ID when I was picking up my testosterone and instead of my driver’s license, I accidentally grabbed the fool tarot card I keep behind it in my phone case and went to hand that to her

[just--icy]

[achillesinhighheels]

choosing to ignore my weirdly symbolic dream because i have a lot going on rn already

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

How to brew a magic potion or perhaps an elixir

[probablybadrpgideas]

Detect evil but it becomes increasingly clear that whoever calibrated it had some really weird moral stances.

[dragoryu3000]

Yeah, his name was Gary Gygax

[hvlth-gxth-deactivated20170928]

Refer to England as “a mysterious and warlike nation off the coast of western Asia”

[malibuklaus]

[galadriel1010]

Sometimes you get a brief glimpse into the American worldview and decide that you don't want to know.

[transcyberism]

I cannot stress enough that this meme is entirely literal. there's no reference or subtext you don't know. these are simply the objectively most popular works of art from each denomination.

[datadegroove-deactivated2026042]

penis isn't real. pussy isn't even real. the only thing that is real, is the pleasure of combat

[darillium-night]

Update from the man himself

The Porn Guy aka The Nice Guy aka The Canadian side of Pornhub aka SFW Pornhub’s REAL NAME is Ryan Creamer. No joke, that is legit his real name.

Also this.

Which led him to this.

Bless this man.

[the-nightman783]

[lynati]

I can appreciate him and the service he’s providing independently of the shitshow that is the platform he’s hosted on.

[fly-chicken]

He remains just as funny and weird on other platforms dw

[fly-chicken]

By the way, the topic he was presenting was

‘Can I get an Honorary Degree if I Just Ask Really Nicely’

[intrinsicklutz]

I need y'all to know that he’s not just a part of the shows, Ryan Creamer is a Co-Executive Producer of Game Changer. Legend.

[junglejim4322]

My boyfriend thought I was joking when i said chic fil a is closed on sundays for religious reasons america really is such a cartoon ass country

[seven-predatory-lesbians-deacti]

you have a boyfriend???? ur gay????? hold on

[junglejim4322]

Chic fil a employee finding my posts:

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[sinnahsaint]

I always figured the babies had such serious faces because they were learning so hard. Like, learning to dance(for a baby) is just another skill like learning to hold a spoon or throw a ball.

[appendingfic]

Babies do not understand the relative utility of the skills they are learning so must approach all with the same level of intensity

[sillysayaka]

we should learn from this. we should ball as hard as we work. we should dance as hard as we clean.

[skybread]

Also, balance is hard!

[cryptotheism]

Christmas really has done laps around the simulation/simulacra deal. Christmas isn't really about anything anymore. We have a Christmas themed Christmas in the same sense that studio pornography has sex themed sex. To say nothing or Christmas porn. Wonderful little knot of recursive voyeurism isn't it? Having Christmas sex themed Christmas sex.

[blackbellaswan1]

[despazito]

There's like 2 billion people praying to Allah you're gonna lose

[miiilowo]