SAEYOUNG'S ARMS ALWAYS GOT ME WEAAAKKK THEYRE COMFORTING AND ATTRACTIVE
HE HAS TO COVER THEM UP CUS IM GONNA
Every Saeyoung MC has one collective braincell and it only knows to look at his arms. I can't blame y'all. His arms were made to hold and keep you safe.
*pops head* Sunny we miss you! Hope you're doing great đĽšđĽšđĽš
Andy hello!!! It's so lovely to hear from you, how have you been??
Ah thank you for missing me hahah I've missed you too𼚠yes I've not been too bad thank you!! Lot's of life has happened since I've last been active on here hahah but mainly good things <3 graduated from uni now so onto the next big stage of life𫡠lots of lovely people around me though so v v gratefulđŤś
How's life been treating you?? I hope only good things, it would be so nice to hear what you've been up to𼰠I hope you're taking care of yourself!!
Pairing: Saeyoung Choi x Unnamed MC
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Itâs the twinâs birthday and Saeyoung and his fiancee steal away for a few moments away when it all gets to be a little too much
Word Count: 1.5k
Authorâs note: Hiya guys! Iâm finally back and Iâm so excited to be sharing my writing for the Mystic Messenger fandom once again. This fic was is special to me, because itâs for the twinsâ birthday, and I just love the thought of them living together so happily, and just because itâs my first finished Mystic Messenger piece that Iâve done in years. I hope you enjoy reading this, as much as I loved writing this little splice of life.
- - -
âHappy birthday,â She mumbled against Saeyoungâs lips, her eyes searching his own.
The rhythmic up and down stroking on her back faltered for a second before stopping fully and Saeyoungâs warm hand settled on her hip, pulling her even closer.Â
The summer night breeze was chilly, but the goose bumps covering their skin was in anticipation of what was to come, not the wind.Â
âStop reminding me that Iâm old,â he complained, in an over-exaggerated and drama-filled voice. She almost bent to grab one of the pillows from the patio furniture - discolored from the sun kissing it every moment of every day in the summer - yet when she looked at his face, she saw his eyes twinkling with happiness and couldnât bear to even possibly wipe it off.
âIâll be turning the same age soon, are you calling me old as well?â She asked, raising her eyebrow in a challenge.Â
âPractically grandma age,â Saeyoung continued on, his eyes sparkling with a laugh. Quickly though, his laugh dropped and he stood up straight, examining the top of her head. âYup, youâre ancient. I see gray hair growing in.â His tone was teasing and if it were anyone else, she would have been offended, even if it was only a joke. But Saeyoung was⌠Saeyoung, and she knew he never meant any harm to her. He paused once more before adding, âbut donât worry, I still love you.â
âShut up,â She replied, pulling him in and ghosting her lips over his once again. âBut I love you too, gramps.â
And she only went and wrote the sweetest birthday fic ????? Known to mankind ????? About my boy ??????? Making me fall further into my pit than I already was ????? What is daylight ?????? Idk anymore all I can see is Brynâs Saeyoung and thatâs all I need to be quite honest
First of all, the banter is ON POINT. I love them both. Look at them. So disgustingly in love. I love it.
but then you had to change mood, didnât you? Then you had to make my boy, my poor poor boi, doubt himself. You made him a little raisin of doubt, but then he was revived into a lovely grape full of confident juice (itâs 4am please idk either) and you got me emo all over again. How do you do that huh witch how do you do the thing that makes me gođĽşđĽ°đ
âRika and I might have been the founders, but you made it possible.â fucking LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK. This line smacked me round the face with with a sign that said âthe truthâ and I can now see God. What a good fucking opinion.
And of course Vanderwood just rocks up with a cake, so on brand. He vanderWOULD. What a king. Have my children.
SIKE SAEYOUNG AND HIS BUCKETS OF SEXINESS AND TENDER BROTHER FLAKES IS THE ONLY BABY DADDY FOR ME. Like how am I supposed to resist fucking look at it. You did that. You made him sođĽşđĽş and so đĽ°đĽ° that I will đđ myself to sleep.
âThe picture that Jihyun had taken of them was one that each boy kept in the wallet, close at all times, so they would never forget - not that they ever would.â well gee guess Iâll go scream into the void about how this is the best fucking sentence to ever grace my eye holes. Simply inconsolable. You writing witch how dare you.
Welcome back bbyđ I will celebrate your return by sobbing over this for the next 10 business days
You know the drill by now lol, just something short and sweet!
I know I did this last year but once again this is quite Saeyoung oriented. âTis made v clear that Saeran is having a lovely birthday too though <3
All the love to the Choi bois they deserve everything good and more.
Still thinking about Vanderwood in the birthday cg.
***
âHeâs going to be just fine, my love,â you cooed, running your hands through his hair as his face sat tucked into your neck.
You were sitting opposite one another on his bed, his hands bunching the material at your waist. He inhaled deeply, taking in your scent in an attempt to ground himself, focusing only on your fingertips that threaded through his crimson locks, scratching lightly against his scalp.
âI know, I justâŚI canât help it.â
âI know you canât, gorgeous. I know you worry about him,â you gently took his face in your hands and removed it from your shoulder, giving his face a careful once over, brushing his cheekbones with the pads of your thumbs.
Saeyoung focused in on your eyes as they glided across his features, leaning into your touch whilst you caressed his skin. There was no safer place to him than the palm of your hand, literally and figuratively.
You pressed a chaste kiss onto his forehead and let your lips rest there, âRemember this was his choice. He wanted to hang out with Yoosung today, and Zen will be joining too after his rehearsal. Then after his dinner with Jumin, V and Jaehee, heâll be back here where you can see him,â now that you were forehead to forehead, you could get him to look into your eyes, âHeâs trying to find his place in the group, so he wants some time on his own with them. Everyone will be back together tonight, Vanderwoodâs got everything set up, and we can celebrate even more then. Heâll be having an amazing time.â
Saeyoung sighed as his eyes closed, fully absorbed in the cloud of tranquillity and ease that you always managed to create around him, no matter how frantic his mind and how close he was to spiralling. âYouâre right, youâre right. Everyone will take good care of him.â
âAnd heâll take good care of himself too, remember.â
He smiled, âThat too. Thank you.â
âNow,â you perked up, peppering his face with quick pecks and lingering kisses upon his cheeks before pulling back with a loud smack, âstop with that face, youâll get wrinkles if you carry on.â
His mouth was curling into a sly smile before you could even anticipate whatever remark he had brewing, âHey, I thought youâd like that. Didnât you say you usually go for older-OW!â
With a light smack on his shoulder, that you knew didnât actually hurt him, you rolled your eyes at him. Looks like he was doing better. âI said older, not elderly. And that point still stands so be careful.â
âJust say you have daddy iss-â
âJuminâs still a single man. I hope you remember that.â
âYes maâam.â
You probably encouraged his behaviour on a daily basis, since you never could quite resist the laughter that he pulled from you. That was his magic trick, no matter how silly his jokes were or how unusual his antics got, you were always so completely, impossibly fond of him. He was the sweetest, in his own strange, Saeyoung way, but sweetest none-the-less. He made you smile. You loved him.
âBut I mean it,â you said once the laughter had dwindled, âI know youâre worried sick about him, like, all of the time, but this is a great challenge for both of you. He gets to start being his own person, and so do you,â you gave him a light, not quite long enough kiss, and you didnât miss the way that his gaze flickered from your eyes, to your lips, and settled back on your eyes again, âremember itâs your birthday too.â
Saeyoung only slightly hesitated before going in for more. He kissed you like he was treasuring every detail of every movement of your lips against his. Moving his hands to the small of your back, he slowly lowered you until you were lying down with his form hovering over you, littering sweet kisses across your jaw and neck.
You adored this side of him, the one that was overflowing with so much love that he didnât know what to do with, so he just poured it all onto you. With no agenda or objective, just an overbearing desire to love and make that love known.
Finally he pulled back and you got a good look into his eyes, which you could see were slightly red from emotion and exhaustion. You knew he hadnât been able to sleep well in the lead up to today, but you never could have guessed from the way honey stared back at you in that moment. Despite his sleepless night, his expression was a picture of peace and wellness.
But still, he needed rest.
âQuick birthday nap? Before the party starts?
âGod youâre so sexy,â he sighed, collapsing all his weight onto you. Despite your squeal and potential winding, his content sigh as he settled against you and once again nuzzled against your neck was enough to make you forget what you were complaining about in the first place. He was warm and comfy and the way he held you made you feel like nothing could make you slip away from this little sanctuary youâd built for yourselves.
And besides, having his weight against you was comforting in a way. It was a firm and constant reminder of his existence, that he was real and breathing and there, and that didnât seem so bad in your books.
âOh my Choi boys,â you said, fingertips once again playing with his soft strands that curled ever so slightly at the ends, something you openly tell him you adore on a regular basis. You kissed the top of his head and buried your nose into his hair, never getting tired of the familiar scent of his shampoo, âwhat am I going to do with you.â
âStay with us and love us and never leave our side forever and always?â
âYeah,â you chuckled, his mumbled request a clear sign of his fading consciousness. At last you settled into your place; him in your arms, you in his, âMaybe Iâll do just that.â
***
Gorgeous gorgeous boys. I love them. Thank you for reading!
I HAD TO I COULDN'T NOT DO IT I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE SAE BUNNY IS CANON đđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ
BUNNY CHOIS ARE THE BESTEST đđđđđđđđ
YOU ALL KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE BUNNIES AND NOW I JUST THINK I'M GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK AAAA đđđđđ
Happy Birthday, Saeran and Saeyoung! Iâm grateful that youâre in my life and Iâm still here with you. Itâs been 6 years since we met, but every day since I joined the RFA has brought change into my life. That change has been for the better, and I donât know where I would be if it wasnât for them. Thatâs why this yearâs art is styled out of Saeranâs journal. Heâs drawing his new memories for a free life, starting with his first real birthday with Saeyoung in a long time. Thereâs more to come for the twins today but weâre starting strong with a new beginning.Â
So with the IkĂŠmen Series exchanges that my best friend @ikemenlibrary has been hosting, Iâve made a few new friends from the fandom so I wanted to let you guys know that Iâve made a sideblog for IkĂŠmen stuff! Sadly because itâs a sideblog I wonât be able to follow back on there, so will be following peeps from here!
So yiss going forward all my IkĂŠmen Series posts/writing etc. will be over on @sunnyikemen !! If you were following me for that then I would head on over there, but of course no pressure to anyoneđ just wanted to keep you all in the know!
I will still of course be active on here, just thought it made sense to have a new hub for that stuff!
I hope youâre all doing well !! Have a beautiful dayđť
I started this blog to share my love of mystic messenger with people. I have since come a long way and had a hard journey, but Iâm excited to come back to my roots and start spreading joy once againÂ
jihyun will always be my beloved, but Iâm also so excited to be exploring my love for the rest of the crew as well <3 thank you for visiting
if youâre a fan of cybirdâs ikemen games, you can also find me over on @ikemenlibrary ~!
Summary: When youâre bound to someone, tied together by spring from the hands of Fate herself, the time never feels like enough. And yet, when the time is cut short the string is not, giving Jihyun something heâd never had before. Before Jane, before their promise, and before her request.
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, unsupportive parents, mentions and brief descriptions of mental illness (specifically anxiety and depression).
Notes: Lads this has been sitting in a google docs folder for a WHILE. I originally wrote it for the @nostringsdetachedâ zine (which I ADORED being apart  of) but I just never got round to posting when we got the clear to. Iâve re-edited and decided to share, and I hope you enjoy! (also hello nice to see you again<3)
Takes place in an AU where Jihyun meets Jane in his final year of university, during his year abroad in Italy. Before the RFA, before Rika, before he was who he is.
The CMC in question is my OC Jane, who I mentioned in a tag game quite a while back. If by some chance you remember that lol, here she is! I made a little character profile as I was working with an incredible artist (who is inactive now, as far as Iâm aware, but trust me I wept when they brought her to life for me) so I thought Iâd link that here in case you wanted to get a feel for her character! I didnât go into huge descriptive detail about her in this piece just because of the nature of the zine, so I thought Iâd share.
***
âOh, Iâm sorry. Iâll leave you to it.â
Jihyun was starving for some fresh air, weaving through the waves of students that huddled together in the already stuffy living room. The air had grown stifling, sticky â his patience wavering with every clap on his back and every roar from the neverending game of beer pong.
He had slid aside the glass door to the balcony, confident that the other guests were far too engrossed in the festivities to notice a ghost like him fade from view. However, upon stepping out into the cool evening air, he discovered that the balcony which he had previously assumed to be empty was, in fact, occupied.
She must have noticed the growing rose in his cheeks and the slight crack in his voice, as she offered him a kind â perhaps pitiful, Jihyun was unsure â smile. âDonât be silly, youâre welcome to join me. Iâd enjoy the company.â
Summary: When youâre bound to someone, tied together by spring from the hands of Fate herself, the time never feels like enough. And yet, when the time is cut short the string is not, giving Jihyun something heâd never had before. Before Jane, before their promise, and before her request.
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, unsupportive parents, mentions and brief descriptions of mental illness (specifically anxiety and depression).
Notes: Lads this has been sitting in a google docs folder for a WHILE. I originally wrote it for the @nostringsdetachedâ zine (which I ADORED being apart  of) but I just never got round to posting when we got the clear to. Iâve re-edited and decided to share, and I hope you enjoy! (also hello nice to see you again<3)
Takes place in an AU where Jihyun meets Jane in his final year of university, during his year abroad in Italy. Before the RFA, before Rika, before he was who he is.
The CMC in question is my OC Jane, who I mentioned in a tag game quite a while back. If by some chance you remember that lol, here she is! I made a little character profile as I was working with an incredible artist (who is inactive now, as far as Iâm aware, but trust me I wept when they brought her to life for me) so I thought Iâd link that here in case you wanted to get a feel for her character! I didnât go into huge descriptive detail about her in this piece just because of the nature of the zine, so I thought Iâd share.
***
âOh, Iâm sorry. Iâll leave you to it.â
Jihyun was starving for some fresh air, weaving through the waves of students that huddled together in the already stuffy living room. The air had grown stifling, sticky â his patience wavering with every clap on his back and every roar from the neverending game of beer pong.
He had slid aside the glass door to the balcony, confident that the other guests were far too engrossed in the festivities to notice a ghost like him fade from view. However, upon stepping out into the cool evening air, he discovered that the balcony which he had previously assumed to be empty was, in fact, occupied.
She must have noticed the growing rose in his cheeks and the slight crack in his voice, as she offered him a kind â perhaps pitiful, Jihyun was unsure â smile. âDonât be silly, youâre welcome to join me. Iâd enjoy the company.â
Perhaps it was the smile â which he now decided was indeed kind â or the gesturing nod, or the way she shuffled to the side as an invitation for him to take the space next to her, but he found his feet moving towards her before he could even really acknowledge it. Like he had been pulled in. He leant on the railing, careful to not let his elbow brush against hers, as they silently watched over the bustling, quaint Italian city.
Jihyun didnât entirely understand why he had chosen a year abroad for his final year of university, nor did he understand why his father had agreed to it in the first place. Maybe it was the promise he had made to focus solely on his studies and was just in need of a fresh environment to do so. Or maybe, in some capacity, his father knew that he already had his son locked down, that he had no need to worry about him straying from the path he had personally laid out for him. Because he wouldnât, Jihyun also knew that. He wasnât going anywhere.
âI donât think Iâve seen you take one swig of that beer since you got here,â she said with a playful chuckle, the same sweet smile gracing her features, ânot a big drinker?â
He swirled the amber liquid in the bottle, shrugging a little, âJust not a fan of beer really. It was thrust into my hand when I arrived and to be honest, I felt too awkward to put it down.â Jihyun had a surge of courage then, turning his body to face her entirely, one arm on the railing, âAnd what about you? Iâve only seen you barely take a sip of your wine since it was poured for you.â
Because it was true, she had caught his attention nearly the second he arrived, and Jihyun felt an almost youthful spark of euphoria at the fact that he had also caught hers.
âIt was a thank-you-gift from a friend for hosting this party, bless her. I didnât have the heart to tell her that wine makes me ill.â
They stared at each other for a moment before erupting into full laughs, wordlessly trading drinks and settling back into their place above the city.
If he had only been watching her before, he was now actually, fully appreciating her. She was the living embodiment of a free spirit, even by her looks alone. Long, wavy, brown locks fell over her shoulders, messily tossed over one side. Her long, light skirt just brushed against the top of her raggedy boots, and she wore a jumper that was entirely too large for her and was the kind youâd expect to see your grandpa in. There was jewellery anywhere jewellery could be â gemstones displayed on nearly all her fingers, silver adorning her ears and neck.
It was not exclusively her looks, though. All evening she had been a harbour, a source of spirit. Everyone practically flocked to her every time she walked into a room. Her night so far seemed to have consisted of tight embraces, full-bellied laughs, unstrained smiles and casual touches. Comfortable, amiable intimacy was apparently her forte, something that was sufficiently unfamiliar to Jihyun. Some may say he was starved of it, but he was also wildly fascinated by it. This girl was an enigma to him.
She was absolutely delightful.
And now, away from the energy of the party, she appeared so calm. She was a picture of peace. Sublime, Jihyun might say, but only to himself.
âIâm quite surprised to see you at a first-yearâs party, to be honest. Arenât you third-years too mature and sophisticated for that?â she teased, her eyes still fixed on the city ahead but he could see the curve of her lips and the glisten in her eye.
âI live in the flat below. My flatmate was invited but he begged me to come along to keep him company. Although,â he said, turning to watch his friend inside who currently had his tongue down a girlâs throat, âhe seems to be doing just fine.â
âHeâs having fun, Iâd say heâs doing more than just fine. Itâs nice to see. So many people are content with âjust fineâ. Too many, I think.â
âIâm guessing that was a dig at me,â Jihyun said amusedly.
âNot a dig, just an observation. And besides,â there was a knowing smile on her face that revealed both everything and nothing at once, âyouâre not like that I donât think. Youâll be the one hosting parties one day. Once you learn to let go.â
âI donât understand what you mean.â
She finally moved her eyes away from the hustle and bustle below and turned her whole body to him, giving him a once over. He felt the urge to squirm under her gaze. It wasnât a look of scrutiny that he was so used to, especially from his father, but one of care. It was gentle, warm. Tender.
Jihyun damn near jumped out of his skin when she moved towards him. The last thing he was expecting her to do was ruffle his hair, moving down to unbutton the first few buttons of his shirt before untucking it from his trousers. He looked around frantically, fretting about how this could be interpreted from an outside perspective, what assumptions could be made. She didnât seem at all bothered.
She stood back from him, admiring him as though he was her finest artwork. With a satisfied nod and a sip of her beer, she returned to her space on the railing, as though nothing had happened. As though her heart wasnât pounding against her ribs like Jihyunâs was.
âAnd what was the point of that?â
âThe start of you letting go.â
âThatâs a lovely thought, but I donât think it works like that.â
âBut it did.â
âHow do you know?â
âYour shoulders have relaxed and the crease between your eyebrows has smoothed. You show more than you tell, even when you donât mean to.â
âOh yeah? And what else do I show?â
âYour eyes,â she noted, âtheyâre yearning.â
âI think youâre giving me too much credit. I donât believe Iâm capable of creating something so beautiful, like you are.â
âOh ye of little faith.â
He watched her now with a newfound curiosity that felt foriegn to him. What was it like to see the world through her eyes? How was the way she looked at the city different from his? How could he live up to her expectations of him, and why did he have such a desire to do so?
Jihyun didnât have long to ponder over these thoughts, however, because just as soon as they were raised, they flew away with the sliding of the door. Another girl stumbled in, eyes frantic and voice panicked, âJane! Sofia is throwing up in the bathroom and sheâs asking for you. Would you mindâŚ?â
âOkay dokay, Iâll be right there,â Jane replied, pulling her friend into a side hug and planting a kiss on her cheek with a loud smack. Jihyun noticed the anxiety drain from the girl, from her face to her feet, her jumbled jabbering replaced by light giggles that tumbled out of her mouth freely as she skipped back inside.
âI guess thatâs my cue,â Jane chuckled, taking a hair-tie off her wrist, almost as though she was prepared for this situation. Jihyun imagined she was.
âGood luck, Jane.â Her name fell easily from his lips, felt welcome on his tongue, like he had been saying it all his life; like a distant memory.
âIâll see you around,â she said, pulling him into a tight embrace. In normal circumstances he would have been startled and flustered by the gesture, and though he definitely acknowledged the heat in his cheeks, he couldnât help but feel that he was expecting it. It was just so her, whatever that really meant. He felt an ineffable urge to find out.
âAnd I will see you around,â she teased, positively beaming at him, âyou canât get rid of me that easily, Jihyun.â
He didnât know how she knew his name, but he didnât even get a chance to ask as the moment it left her lips, she left him on the balcony, bouncing back into the flat to comfort her friend.
Jihyunâs eyes followed her as she left, and now fell on the activities that took place inside. He had only spoken to her for no longer than twenty minutes, but in that time his whole perspective had shifted, no doubt in part due to Jane and their encounter.
The guys shouting and cheering as they played beer pong no longer poked at his nerves, but rather encouraged him to join in on their jubilations. The music was no longer a dull beat in the background, but now had his feet tapping. The couple making out in the corner no longer repulsed him, but now made him think of the buzz of young love, the beauty of the reckless and the free.
His once immovable hold started to slack, but there was a thrill that came with the guilty grip of his fingertips, for now they held on with the potential of one day letting go.
***
The following encounter Jihyun had with Jane flew by.
As he came out of his class Jihyun got a glimpse of her, grocery bags up to her elbows that he could already imagine leaving deep pink marks along her arms. However, that was clearly not enough to dampen her mood, as she stumbled down the path with a smile on her face and joy illuminating her features.
Her eyes caught his and in a split second she was bounding towards him, greeting those who seemed to recognise her on her way. Clearly he wasnât the only one charmed by her.
âJihyun!â
âHello, Jane. Are you going back to the flat? Let me carry some of that for you.â
But just as he went to relieve her of some of the weight, she glanced into one bag, a twinkle in her eye and a sly curve in her lip. His heart danced.
âLetâs go for a picnic!â
âRight now?â
âRight now. I know a lovely spot, letâs go!â
And just like that, Jane grabbed his hand and all but skipped down the street. At some point he had managed to take some of the bags from her, finally settling on 50/50 despite the fight she put up.
Her presence was easy and comfortable, despite the occasional skip in his heartâs otherwise regular rhythm whenever she held their eye contact for an extra second, or brushed her fingertips against his forearm as she laughed. Even if he wanted to believe it was so, Jihyun knew at heart that she wasnât flirting. This was just her, brimming with genuine and innocent affection. She wasnât trying to shoot her shot, she was just positively, undeniably fond of him.
And Jihyun wouldnât have it any other way. Though he enjoyed the subtle flush of her cheeks when he leaned over and tucked a stray hair behind her ear as her hands were busy making him a daisy chain. He had only pure intentions, it was just a happy bonus.
During their casual chatter, Jihyun asked her how much heâd owe her for the food, which was only returned by a wave of her hand and a stubborn shake of her head.
âIâll just provide the food next time then,â he stated.
Neither were particularly good at hiding their excitement at the possibility of a ânext timeâ.
***
Several next times later, Jihyun still couldn't believe how seamlessly the seconds slipped by.
Jihyun sat stiffly on her bed as he tried his hardest not to shuffle under her attention, the brush gliding across the canvas in swift, free movements. Every time she glanced at him he felt his chest flutter, the feeling not unfamiliar but also not unwelcome.
Something within him shifted again when she finally revealed the finished product. He was overcome with a desire to create, every paint stroke examined only fuelling this more. A string of compliments and expressions of gratitude fell from his lips, and he looked up at her before she could shy away, âPlease may I paint you too?â
Janeâs expression fell ever so slightly, which didn't go unnoticed by Jihyun, âWouldnât you rather paint something else?â
âNo,â he stated, eyes locked on hers, âI want to paint you.â
With hesitant hands she handed him the resources, fiddling with her fingers once they were no longer occupied. Jihyun had never seen her so unsure.
âI donât know what to do with myself,â she laughed, timid and uncertain but only to the trained eye.
âHmm,â Jihyun surveyed the room, spotting the slightly battered but obviously well-loved guitar in the corner. âPlay me something?â
And she could never deny him, so she did just that â fingertips plucking at the strings with such grace that Jihyun worried he would never do her beauty justice. But in time, the sketches became paint and the hums became song, both lost in a sanctuary they had built with their trust and inspiration alone.
âYouâre lovely,â he said.
âAnd youâre wonderful,â she replied.
Jane almost cried when she saw his finished piece, though she wouldnât reveal to him why. Heâll find out one day.
Heâll know her one day.
**
And again, just like every other meeting, they just simply couldnât keep their grip tight enough on the hours.
The day Jihyun told his father he would no longer be pursuing a career in business, Jane had waited anxiously in her room, leg bobbing and teeth gnawing at her lips. She had practically jumped out of her seat when she heard a huge door slam from below her â from Jihyunâs flat. No more than half an hour after his father had arrived.
She waited a moment, then her phone lit up.
Jihyun: Itâs done.
Jane didnât bother asking if he needed someone, she knew heâd lie. Essentially throwing herself down the stairs, she made round the corner to Jihyunâs flat, only to stop in her tracks at the sight of a man in a crisp navy suit leaning against the wall, pinching the bridge of his nose. She saw a glimpse of her own father in his stone demeanour, his cold expression. Her stomach turned.
He saw her, sparing her barely a glance, then moved past her. Though it became abundantly clear that he had given her far more than just a glance when he spat something under his breath, stopping just next to her, eyes forward.
âKnow your place.â
âSorry,â she bit out, turning her head to look him dead in the eyes, âI donât like to stay in the same place for too long.â
He scoffed, âYouâre all the same.â And then he disappeared down the stairwell.
Jane flew to Jihyunâs door, quietly tapping her knuckles against the wood. It wasnât long until he opened it, a small and unconvincing smile plastered onto his face as he let her in. He shut the door behind her.
âCome on,â she cooed, opening her arms for him, âlet it out.â
He finally crumpled into her then, head in the crook of his neck and shaking arms in a death grip around her waist. He didnât cry, but the sheer force with which he held onto her told her all she needed to know. He was broken, but in the same way that the sun must break the indigo sky in order for another day to begin.
At some point they descended to the floor, and there they stayed until sunset, her hands gently combing through his hair.
***
There was only instance where time passed excruciatingly slowly.
Jihyun stared at his phone.
Jihyun: Havenât you seen you recently, you okay?
Jane: oh, yeah sorry! iâve been kinda sick so just cooped up in the flat hahahah, iâm all good though! iâll be around again soon, just donât wanna make you ill as well!! so stay away you!! ;)
It was simple enough, yet Jihyun couldnât stop the anxiety from creeping up his skin. He decided to text one of her flatmates asking if they could just check up on her, so he knows that sheâs actually okay. That she was telling him the whole truth in her text, despite what his gut was telling him.
She had never been this quiet.
He got a text back a couple hours later saying that everyone else went home for the weekend, and that she usually forgets to lock the door during the day so if he feels the need to, he can probably check up on her. She wouldnât mind the intrusion if itâs him, they said.
It was evening when Jihyun decided that the worry was too much and he went upstairs.
He knocked once, no answer. Twice, no answer. After three knocks, the adrenaline kicked in and he entered the silent flat. He rushed to her room, and released a shaky breath when he spotted her through the crack of her door, sound asleep at her desk. Still not completely convinced, though, he approached her slowly, and his heart dropped.
Her face was coated in black smudges, from both the charcoal in her hand and the mascara that ran down her cheeks and collected under her eyes. Underneath her was her sketchbook, one that she never let anyone touch, let alone peek in. On one occasion she had let him move it, which shocked her flatmates to no end. But he never looked inside. Now he saw a glimpse of the angry, painful, dark sketches as they lay under her sleeping head.
Everyone thought of her as a painter, that is what they knew of her; nobody was aware of the charcoal lines she scratched into the paper behind closed doors. He inspected them further, identifying one as a self-portrait, and Jihyun almost felt sick from how she portrayed herself - anxious, tired, alone - and he suddenly understood why she had become so emotional the day he painted her. She just simply didnât see herself with the same beauty that he did, that she was, which was evident by the harsh, ugly lines that filled the pages of her visual diary.
Having cried herself to exhaustion, Jihyun easily lifted her and carried her to her bed without so much as a stir. He tucked her in, bringing the blanket up to her chin and smoothing down her hair, watching with unfettered affection as her eyes fluttered in her sleep.
Jihyun slept on her sofa that night, unwilling to leave her completely alone. Theyâd talk in the morning, but for now, he let her rest.
***
It was only a matter of time.
Their reckless wandering had led them here, settling down on Jihyunâs bed and watching over the city where they had built their friendship, much like the night they met. Jihyunâs chin rested upon Janeâs shoulder, his arms looped around her middle, her back against his chest. Neither one knew that the other was lost in their thoughts, let alone that one was significantly more lost. And not the kind of lost she so often craved.
The call Jane had received only a couple weeks before played on repeat through her already busy mind like a broken record. It popped and crackled like one too, her choked sobs having been her only response before the cold click sounded on the other end, followed by deafening silence.
She hadnât done enough. She hadnât reached her end of the deal, and now she had to face the consequences. It had been one year and she had still not impressed her father, so Jane was to return to England to study law, following the path her father had laid out for her in the beginning. Jane always thought she could get away with a little bit of wandering, but this particular adventure had come to a close and this time, she was completely powerless. Jihyun didnât even know yet.
She was set to leave in the morning.
She grit her teeth and brought herself back to the present, savouring every luscious moment she had left with him. Her next adventure would come soon, she thought. But right now, as the departing sun painted the sky with warm hues, she wanted to stop running for just a moment, since her greatest discovery currently held her in place. Jane never liked staying in the same place, but now there was nowhere else she'd rather be.
Despite the pleasant silence, there was still a heaviness that hung in the air. Words that hadnât yet been said, the knowledge that they both felt the way they did but were comfortable simply basking in the warmth of their company. But now they couldnât help wondering if friends really held each other like this. Longed for eachother like this.
Intimacy had been so alien to Jihyun that he started to question whether his overbearing desire to have her in his arms was as innocent as he convinced himself it was. Jane wondered the same. She was always free with her affection, never a second thought when she held and kissed her loved ones, void of romantic ties. But now she was painfully aware of his hands on her, his nose pressed against her neck. There was now hesitation in her affection, and there was urgency in his intimacy, both alarm-ringing signs that something here was different, and the powerful seduction of the unexplored was oh so richly felt by both parties.
Jane suddenly jumped out of Jihyunâs grasp, crossing her legs in front of him. He mirrored her action, his confusion quickly dissipated by intrigue.
âI need you to promise me that, no matter what, weâll always find each other. That come what may, weâll make our way back to each other, and will have unwavering faith that we will do so, no matter how unlikely it seems. Please, promise me, Jihyun.â
Jihyun didnât question her request, he rarely did. Rather he raised his pinky, waiting for her to lock her own with his. She wanted to laugh, it was such an incredibly sweet gesture. But instead she took it firmly, binding them together in the vow they made, though they both imagined that binding was there even well before the night he had found her on that balcony.
It was inevitable. Fateâs cards had been dealt to them before they knew they were playing. Before they knew the rules.
So they showed their cards.
There was an eternity between the lift of Jihyunâs hand and its contact with her cheek. His knuckles brushed against her skin, warm and inviting. His fingertips then trailed down her face as he guided her gaze onto his. She held onto his wrist, her eyes on his, calling to him the same thing she said the night they met.
Let go.
And it was right then, in the glow of dusk and the quiet of the nearly sleeping city, that their lips brushed against each other for the first time. It was hesitant, tender, yet electrifying. It wasnât long until they invited more, hands roaming over unexplored territory with new eyes â eyes that no longer hid behind the words unsaid. They welcomed their once hesitant curiosity with unbridled abandon, selling their secrets to the night; fumbling hands putting the key in the last lock on their hearts.
Jane didnât sleep, she simply savoured his embrace every second before dawn as he slumbered. Limbs tangled, skin against skin, souls intertwined. But once the first rays of morning showed their colour, she knew it was time to go.
Her head lay on Jihyunâs bare chest, his arm draped lazily over her, his quiet, shallow breaths tickling her skin. Jane took the opportunity to absorb his features, committing every detail to memory in a rare moment of grounded presence. Hot tears spilled from her eyes as she untangled herself from him and collected herself, unable to look away from him for more than a second despite the colours swimming together as she silently cried beside him.
She had told him so many times to let go, and he had. That was the quiet boyâs cry. Now this was the wild girlâs whisper, for all she wanted was to hold on with all the strength she could muster.
She found some paper and a pen, the ink leaving her last request of this adventure. She refrained from writing the three words that had hung on her tongue since he first took her in his arms, knowing that if she did so, she might be suggesting that it was her last chance to tell him. But it wasnât, she had promised.
Jane placed the note on his bedside table and leant over him, giving him a gentle kiss on his cheek so as not to wake him. âUntil next time, my love,â she whispered, and left.
Jihyun woke to an empty side of the bed, cold and void of that which he longed for. âJane?â he called out, eyes falling on the messily folded piece of paper beside him. His heart hammered against his ribs as he opened it out, eyes scanning over the only two words she left him.
Have faith.
Jihyun chuckled despite the sting in his eyes and searing hot sorrow in his veins. It was only two words, but it was enough. It had to be.
He took the spare key she had given him, knowing that her flatmates were once again away. When he saw for himself that any trace of her had disappeared, he went to her balcony â where they had first unknowingly made their promise.
He lifted his pinky to the sky. âYou were trying to tell me something, werenât you? I promise Iâll pay more attention next time. Next time.â
One day, theyâll have the future they never got the chance to discuss. One day, heâll hold her in his arms again and never have to worry about running out of time. And one day, heâll choose the wrong path which will convince himself that any future possibility of tasting the sweetness of joy was gone, thatâd heâd destroyed his one and only chance. Heâll hurt, get hurt, and become hopeless. But then, one day, heâll meet her again in the strangest of circumstances, and one day sheâll be able to tell him âI was right.â
And one day, heâll reply, with firm and uninhibited confidence, âYou were.â
As long as he did what she asked of him with those two small words. And he would.
As he held his pinky up, he felt an invisible tug, like the sky had tied string around it and pulled. It was barely even there, a flutter of a moment, but no less certain. In an instant he felt something wash over him â relief? Peace? Hope? It hit him after a moment, abruptly and resolutely.
âIâll find you, my dear, but until then -
Have faith.â
***
Thank you so much for reading, have a beautiful day <3
