You brought this story back?!?! Where have I been. 😭
Giiiirl , it’s been a gooood minute. My ass done forgot I had written new shit for this damn story.
Peter Solarz
todays bird

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if i look back, i am lost
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@sailout-ff
You brought this story back?!?! Where have I been. 😭
Giiiirl , it’s been a gooood minute. My ass done forgot I had written new shit for this damn story.
Chapter 25 - Deja Vu
2 years later
May 2017
India
I looked into the mirror as I placed the last of my make-up on. Rubbing my lips together one last time in order to smooth the lip gloss I had just applied.
“Lo, girl what the fuck is you doing? Let’s go!” Xavier yelled as he knocked on the bathroom door.
“I’m coming!” I shouted, looking myself over one more time before making my way out.
“Ma-ma.” I smiled at the sound of my baby girl’s voice.
“Hi Lani.” I coo’ed as I bent down to pick her up off the floor. She smiled at me before grabbing my cheeks and kissing me on the nose, causing me to laugh as I returned the gesture.
“Look at my two favorite girls.” Xavier said smiling as he walked out of the bedroom closet. “Daddy!” Lani screamed as she was trying her best to get out of my arms.
Keep reading
have you ever thought about writing on wattpad??
i have . but i deleted my account .
Chapter 25 - Deja Vu
2 years later
May 2017
India
I looked into the mirror as I placed the last of my make-up on. Rubbing my lips together one last time in order to smooth the lip gloss I had just applied.
“Lo, girl what the fuck is you doing? Let’s go!” Xavier yelled as he knocked on the bathroom door.
“I’m coming!” I shouted, looking myself over one more time before making my way out.
“Ma-ma.” I smiled at the sound of my baby girl’s voice.
“Hi Lani.” I coo’ed as I bent down to pick her up off the floor. She smiled at me before grabbing my cheeks and kissing me on the nose, causing me to laugh as I returned the gesture.
“Look at my two favorite girls.” Xavier said smiling as he walked out of the bedroom closet. “Daddy!” Lani screamed as she was trying her best to get out of my arms.
Keep reading
India and Xae got MARRRRRIED? You better make that into a chapter ! Happy Aug & Nené worked their problems out 😍 Glad you're writing again , I missed you 😩
Xavier - “Yes we got married. But I don’t know if y’all ready to hear what happened that day lol.”
August - “Aye, y’all know that’s MY baby.”
-
Aw, thank you for reading! I missed you guys too!
Chapter 25 - Deja Vu
2 years later
May 2017
India
I looked into the mirror as I placed the last of my make-up on. Rubbing my lips together one last time in order to smooth the lip gloss I had just applied.
“Lo, girl what the fuck is you doing? Let’s go!” Xavier yelled as he knocked on the bathroom door.
“I’m coming!” I shouted, looking myself over one more time before making my way out.
“Ma-ma.” I smiled at the sound of my baby girl’s voice.
“Hi Lani.” I coo’ed as I bent down to pick her up off the floor. She smiled at me before grabbing my cheeks and kissing me on the nose, causing me to laugh as I returned the gesture.
“Look at my two favorite girls.” Xavier said smiling as he walked out of the bedroom closet. “Daddy!” Lani screamed as she was trying her best to get out of my arms.
oh hey there .
Updated Chapter List -
1. - Starting Over -
2. - Almost There -
3. - Play No Games -
4. - Comfort Inn Ending -
5. - Now and Forever -
6. - They Don’t Know -
7. - I Lied -
8. - Grand Piano -
9. - All Things Go -
10. - Up In Flames -
11. - Daddy’s Day -
12-1 - Heat of the Moment (Part 1) -
12-2. - Heat of the Moment (Part 2) -
13. - Like the Wind -
14-1. - Celebration (Part 1) -
14-2. - Celebration (Part 2) -
15. - Say Goodbye -
16. - Short -
17. - The Beginning of the End -
18. - A Step Closer to the End -
- A Step Closer to the End -
(Disclaimer - some graphic content)
India
I looked to the edge before walking closer to it. Setting my feet right on the edge between life and death. The wind blowing my hair in every direction possible as I closed my eyes and listened to the sound of the ocean. It was so calming. Seagulls could be heard not to far from where I was standing. Inhaling the scent of the salted waters, a smile appeared on my face. I exhaled deeply as I thought about my next move. I contemplated about how my life wasn’t going to be the only one affected if I made the wrong move. I inhaled one more time as I thought this through.
- The Beginning of the End -
- 2 weeks later -
Xavier
I sat on the side of her hospital bed, listening as her heart monitor would beep every few seconds. Her chest heaved up and down as she in and exhaled. I looked at all the damage that was done to her. I knew there had to be something wrong when she never returned my calls for 3 days. I didn’t really think anything of it though. I mean maybe she was busy moving in to her new place in New York or some shit like that. I never would of thought it would of been something this extreme though.
- Short -
India Love
There was this awful like presence as I walked into Xavier’s home. I didn’t know what it was from, or what it could be, but I didn’t like it one bit. “Babe, what’s going on?” I asked as I found him standing in the kitchen with his back facing me and his hands on top of his head. He swiftly turned around and looked at me with this shocked ass expression on his face before it quickly went away and he just shook his head. “Nothin’ ma. I promise.” He assured before he started walking over to me. He smiled down at me before he engulfed me in a hug. I took in his scent as I placed my face in his chest. It was something I could always get use to. Being this close to him, having his smell intoxicate me. This was something that I never wanted to be away from. He was something that I never wanted to be away from. Just in this short period of time, I’ve come to really picture the rest of my life with Xavier. Him and I, Aleeyah and possibly 2 or 3 other sets of feet running around. I smiled at the thought.. Goals.
-
- Say Goodbye -
( thefanficpurge )
Xavier Alexander
July 6th, 2015
“I waaaaaaay uh. I feel best...” Aleeyah sang, fuckin’ up Big Sean’s ‘Blessed’ track. All I could do was laugh as it was just me and her in the car. “Girl, what you know ‘bout dis?” I asked as I looked at her through the rear view. “Inda allway sing it.” She said sounded proud as fuck. All I do was shake my head. Only my child. I had stopped at a red light just as my phone started going off. Looking down at the middle console, I read the number that showed and sighed to myself before picking it up as I turned the radio volume down.
“Hello General.” I said clearly into the phone just as the light turned green, causing me to speed off down the road. “Hello Brown. How are you doing?” He said, causing me to start getting nervous. “Been pretty good sir, and yourself?” I wasn’t ready for where this conversation where was about to go. “That’s good to hear. Been pretty busy if I do say so myself. I got good and bad news for you Solider.” He said making me let out a big ass sigh. Here we go. “Alright. Bad news first.” I said as I made a left hand turn in order to make my way towards India’s house. “Suit yourself. Bad news, here we go. We need you. Like yesterday.” I huffed and ran a hand down my face just as I pulled up into India’s driveway. ‘Fuck my fucking life.’ I thought to myself as I inhaled. “Okay. And good news? Can’t be anything better than getting deployed again. Yay.” I stated sarcastically causing the General to chuckle before he spoke again. “You’re not going out of the country. Congratulations, you’re welcome.” I kissed my teeth as I removed the phone from my ear and looked at it like this man was crazy. “Man fuck you mean ‘Congratulations’? I gotta leave my fucking daughter to help your fuck ass and you talking ‘bout some Congratulations? Fuck that shit bruh.” I snapped, soon regretting it as I awaited the punishment I was about to receive. “Alright Xavier. Don’t fucking test me right now. Because I can take back the order I made for you to stay your greedy no good ass in the States. Don’t make me ship your ass overseas or some shit. When you get to where you’re going to be stationed, I want your yellow ass in my office ASAP! I’ma send your ass back to basic and have them work off that fuck ass attitude of yours Xavier. Don’t play with me.” He retorted, putting me on hush mode. I deserved that to be honest.
The General was really close friends with my Father, so he kind of pushed me into joining the Army. He felt it would be good for me and my disorder. So during the middle of my High school career, I enlisted and then after I graduated and went through that summer, I was sent to basics. Shit kicked my fucking ass fa’ real. But it was what I needed. Even though I was in pain and tired as hell half the time, I loved that shit and had the time of my life. After going through Basic, I had went on to Advanced and that shit was aight fa’ a nigga. After going through that shit, I was sent out overseas (can’t tell you where ya’ know, cause if I do, I gotta kill you afterwards) for a couple months until a nigga got shot and that was that. I told the General I wasn’t coming back. Fuck I look like fucking around, getting shot then dying and leaving my daughter to fend for herself? Hell nah.
But I had a change of heart about 5 months ago, and called the General and said whenever he need me, I’ll be happy to come back but only if I get to stay in the states. He wasn’t happy ‘bout that shit, but I guess he finally took up my offer cause he on my line now.
“We got a deal Brown?” He said into the phone, bringing me out of my thoughts. “Yeah man. When I gotta head out to wherever you at?” I asked as I watched India come out the front door of her house as I placed my hand on top of my head. “Last day I will allow you to step into my office is Friday. If I don’t see you in my office between now and Friday, I will send out people to come get you, put your ass in handcuffs and personally be brought to me. Now I know you don’t want little Aleeyah seeing her poor father being taking away in handcuffs now will you?” I rolled my eyes at this nigga. He always does this fuck shit. I knew it was my father that put his ass up to this. Prolly told him he can say whatever to me that he wants and as he pleases to get me to get my ass out there on the field. “Nah man. I’ll be out there by Wednesday, Thursday at the latest.” I said into the phone just as India got in the car. I smiled and waved to her as I went back to listening what this nigga had to say. I was honestly tired of the conversation, and was ready for it to end. “Alright. I’ll see you in my office Brown. Have a good rest of your day. Goodbye.” He said, sounding accomplished before he hung up. “Bye nigga.” I said as I placed my phone back in the console.
“Hi baby. Who was that?” India said as she leaned over the armrest to give me a kiss before she sat back and put her seat belt on. I was trying to think of a lie so I wouldn’t have to talk about this right now and have her cause a scene. “One of my niggas out in New York. Tryna get my shipments right over there.” I said as I turned back to face the windshield as I put the car in reverse and pulled out the driveway, back on to the main road.
-
India Love
I had spent the last two days at my parents house cause I was getting this hair laaaaaid. Denise hooked me up with her hair plug and I was so thankful, like frfr. It was ‘bout time I did something with this rat nest I had on top of my head.
india.west - Babygirl got my hair laaaaaaid. Thank you again @hairbyjasmine
I heard Xavier’s car pull up outside so I was tryna get all my stuff together before I headed out. “India baby. You got everything you need baby?” My mother asked as I walked into the kitchen to say goodbye to her. I smiled as I placed a kiss on her cheek and wrapped my free arm around her. “Yes Mommy. I’ll be by in a couple days. I love you.” She smiled as she placed about 5 kisses on my cheek. “I love you too pumpkin. Be safe. Tell Xavier and his little girl I said hello.” I nodded before I checked to make sure I had everything as I made my way to the front door.
As I walked out onto the pavement, I could see Xavier in his car talking on the phone. He looked pretty angry but I wasn’t sure why. I poked my bottom lip out as I walked over to the passenger side door, opening it before I set my few things on the floor and then got in myself. Xavier smiled and waved at me before he listened some more to whoever was on the phone before he took it away from his ear and set it down in the console. “Bye nigga.” He said with an attitude.
“Hi baby. Who was that?” I asked as I leaned over the armrest and kissed him on the lips before I sat back in my seat and placed my seat belt on. “One of my niggas out in New York. Tryna get my shipments right over there.” He said as he put the car in reverse and pulled out the driveway. I felt he was lying cause it was something more serious than just some shipments. But I know he’ll tell me when he feels like it. So I can wait.
“Ya’ hair look nice.” He said looking over at me. I blushed and looked down at my lap as I smiled. “Thank you...” I said sounding like a fucking child. I swear, Xavier always had me feeling like them girls in middle school when they get their first crush. No matter what it was, I still get butterflies when it comes to him. “I LIKE IT TOO INDA!” I heard Aleeyah yell making me jump. I honestly didn’t even know she was in the car. “Oh my goodness. Hi beautiful! I didn’t even see you back there. Thank you.” I said as I reached back to pinch her cheek, making her giggle while I smiled. I swear she’s the cutest thing ever. Xavier was really lucky to have her in his life. She was a big bundle of joy.
I always wanted to have kids. Not sure how many exactly, but I wanted a few of them little munchkins. I wasn’t sure when though. Maybe after college. Maybe sooner. Who knows. I’ma just hope for the best and see how everything plays out. For now, I’m just focused on myself and my relationship.
-
Paris O’Malley
“Tremaine stop!” I yelled as I tried my best to crawl backwards into the corner of the room. There was blood trailed from where I had fell to where I was now currently sitting. My whole body was agony. “Paris get the fuck over here right now!” He yelled as it rang through the halls of his house. I finally had a chance to look at some of the damage he had caused. I had cuts all over my arms, a deep wound in my leg, blood all over almost every inch of my body. I could feel myself become dizzy by the second. Probably from all the blood loss. I closed my eyes for a second to blink before they were shot back open and my breathing had somewhat stopped because it was stuck in my throat. I looked down at my chest. Deeply inserted, with blood running down the blade as long as the rest of my clothes. A knife. He had just stabbed me. I looked up at him as he had an evil smirk plastered on his face. “Fu-fuck you....” I said the best I could as I could feel my chest caving in as his smile only got wider. “Bad choice of words babygirl.” He said in this minicing voice before he pulled the knife out, raising it behind his head before he stabbed me in the chest once again. My breathing hitched again as he removed it once more. I watched as the room around me spun. It was becoming hard for me to keep my eyes open. I let out one more breath of air before I toppled over onto my side as I watched the toe of a Timberland boot come directly at my face...
-
- Celebration (Part 2) -
( thefanficpurge )
A FEW HOURS LATER
Andrea Hope
- Celebration (Part 1) -
( thefanficpurge )
a day late but it’s whatever
Xavier Alexander
July 4th
- Like the Wind -
India Love
5 days later - June 26th
I was sitting on the couch in the living room watching TV, when I heard Xavier bust through the front door before slamming it behind him.
“Babe..” I called out, as I turned around to see him stomping his way into the kitchen. “Fuck that bitch bruh! She up and fucking left with my fucking baby. SHE FUCKING LEFT!” He yelled as he started throwing shit around. I was highkey scared right now. I’ve never seen him THIS upset, and I was really worried as to where this was about to go.
“Xavier baby. What happened? Come on, stop yelling and talk to me..” I said as I walked into the kitchen to see the stools that once stood by the island, on the floor and broken into pieces. He looked up at me. His eyes were that black tint and his hands were covered in blood. Walking over to where he was standing, trying to avoid stepping on broken glass. “Come here. Come on, let’s get you all clean and calmed down.” I said as I locked my arm around his before we walked our way towards the bathroom that was off the kitchen.
-
Xavier Alexander
I’on even think mad was the right word to describe how I was feeling right now. I was fucking livid.
“Come on. What’s wrong baby?” LoLo asked as she was wiping at my hands with some peroxide. Shit burned like a muh’fucka but I wasn’t finna say nothing cause I honestly ain’t care ‘bout my hands right now. “Paris up and fucking left with Aleeyah. She texted me like 3 days ago saying she wasn’t leaving until today. So I went over there to go get Yah, and when I get there, whole fucking place is empty. I swear to God, I’m ready to fucking flare that bitch ass.” I snapped as India started wrapping my hands up. “To keep it from getting infected.” She said as she started placing everything back in the first aid kit before she looked up at me and frowned. “I’m sorry ‘bout Yah, Xavier. But you already know Paris is sneaky like that to pull some dirty shit like that.” She said before she kissed my forehead. “Thank you...” I said before she walked out the bathroom.
I was still mad as shit as Paris tho. Just know when she finally answers my calls, that bitch gon’ get it fr. I ain’t giving no fucks what I say to her. She gon’ understand how I’m feeling about her packing up and leaving with my fucking daughter yo.
I sighed as I looked in the mirror before making my way out the bathroom, hearing “BREAKING NEWS” loud as fuck on the TV making me jump. Damn LoLo, is you deaf or nah ma?
-
India Love
I wasn’t gonna bother Xavier anymore cause I felt he needed to calm down some more. So I just walked my pretty lil’ ass back into the living room and took my original position back on the couch. Grabbing the remote from off the coffee table, I sat back against the cushions before I started flipping through the channels. Wasn’t nothing on so I just settled for the daily news. I mean, it ain’t gon’ hurt nobody to watch the news right?
I grabbed my phone from off the couch before I went to Instagram, and posted a picture I took earlier.
india.west - earlier w/ @tazmanian.devil
“BREAKING NEWS!” blasted on the TV, scaring the fuck outta me. Why I had this shit so loud? As I was turning the sound down I started to read the headline. ‘Mother and Daughter both severely burned in vehicle.’
“Ah damn...” I said before I went back to scrolling through my feed, taking small glances back up at the TV while the story was still being covered.
“The names of the two victims have been released by police. 20 year old Paris Carter and her 3 year old daughter Aleeyah Brown were identified today by our forensic team. Police are saying the fire had to of been started about 3 days ago and the car was just discovered earlier this morning. We will continue this story right after the break...”
I dropped my phone to the floor as I heard Aleeyah’s name...
-
Xavier Alexander
“And her 3 year old daughter Aleeyah Brown were identified today ...” Was all I heard before I fell to my knees on the floor.
No. This wasn’t real. Not my baby. Anybody else BUT my baby.
I felt my heart cave into my chest as I got the worse feeling in my stomach. This wasn’t true. No way. No fucking way. I felt my heart beat slow down as I tried to wrap my mind around this situation. I wasn’t going to believe this. I am NOT going to believe this. My baby... My fucking baby.... Tears started to descend down my face as I fell forward onto my hands. I couldn’t believe this..
She ain’t even get to make it to her 4th fucking birthday... Shit was only about 2 months away, and we was talking about how we was gon’ do her party for months.... She told me all the things she wanted me to buy for her and who all she wanted there...
The tears only fell harder as I thought about this..
My little baby girl was gone..
-
India Love
All I heard was a thud on the hardwood floor coming from the hallway. In that moment I knew Xavier heard what the news caster had said. I felt my eyes get watery at just the thought of Aleeyah being gone and what it was going to do on Xavier.
“Baby...” I said as I let my tears fall as I walked over to where he was hunched over on the floor. “Xavier, I’m so sorry...” I sobbed as I sat in front of him before pulling him into my chest, feeling his tears start to drench my shirt.
I looked at Aleeyah like she was my own. I’ve had some of the greatest moments with her these past couple weeks. I had grown to love her like I’d known her my whole life. She had really made an impact on me in so little time..
And now she’s gone...
I rocked Xavier back in forth in my arms as his crying only got worse. His breathing was heavy and he was shaking like crazy. I rubbed his back as I placed kisses on his forehead.
“I’m so sorry baby. I’m sorry...” I cried even harder as I thought about the death of my brother...
Two special people in my life were just gone.... Like the wind...
-
Xavier Alexander
“Police have yet to discover how the fire was caused. But forensic say both victims were killed by gunshot wound to the head before the car was set on fire.”
My head started pounding at the thought of my fucking child being shot in the head. I was livid at just the thought of who the fuck could of did this to my child.
I only had one name in mind... And just know when I see this nigga again, it’s over.
-