your write up on the mickey-fiona parallels and the elder trio/younger trio parallels made me think about the nuances of ian's place in the elder trio's interpersonal relationships- (taking from dershoimvik's brilliant post about the lip/fiona schisms and ultimate reversal in places) ian being both lip and fiona's stability (fiona with her "you're both my rocks" and lip with ian being his best friend) and their "burden" post-diagnosis (fiona checking his meds constantly and lip's monologue at the financial aid office in s6)
I'd love to hear your thoughts on the major conflicts between ian and the eldest two, I feel like there's a lot to understand on all of their expectations of each other and their characterization that I'm missing
even if ian’s role isn’t as prominent as fiona or lip’s, the elder trio relies on ian! when ian’s out of the equation, fiona and lip don’t have any barrier between them, leading to some real fallouts. lip feels like there’s pressure on him succeeding hinging the family’s well-being on, and fiona feels like lip being uncooperative works against everything she’s been doing to keep the family going/undermines her, and ian…okay so ian is there. there’s so much talk about lip graduating, lip going to college, lip getting out, that it obscures the fact that IAN, TOO is planning on getting out! and he’s closer than lip to it, even! his goal of west point is a high bar to pass, but realistically he is doing really great—he’s kept a steady job at the K&G for years, while achieving through rotc and taking accelerated classes (even if he sucks at math lol). classic middle child syndrome, ian just gets overshadowed…which is why he seeks out external validation. he tells kash about his latest rotc achievements, which kash celebrates with him! he has ned help him with homework! he seeks mickey’s presence when monica rolls back into town! i think ian’s maybe backed himself into a corner within his family where he feels he ‘can’t ask’ for attention from them, even though they all love himmm he’s everyone’s favorite sibling…but this is why ian forms these ‘secret lives’ outside the house, so he can get that attention he’s lacking. fiona&lip are obviously worried about ian’s mental state opening in season5 and that mickey seems to be not taking it seriously, but i also feel like there’s maybe a sense of betrayal happening, too. ian has moved out of the house (!!!) and has a New Family he’s a part of! he’s been such a permanent rock for fiona AND lip, as well as the younger gallaghers, and then he’s gone, and then back for a short time, and then moved out completely, it seems.
ian tries to minimize how much fiona has to worry about him, so he’s not adding more to her already overflowing plate, while being a mediating presence within the house. and when he tries to confide in lip because they are best friends, lip is so judgmental and unsupportive of ian’s choices. he disproves of kash, he disproves of ian wanting to throw his life away on the army, he disproves that ian continues a relationship with mickey and Yes lip has a point with kash/the army and even mickey from his own perspective, but it really doesn’t put ian in a position to continue opening up to him. this is how ian finds real and true respite in mickey…mickey is the first person who really prioritizes ian. i don’t think ian really necessarily wants to be prioritized in his family tbh like when focus is on him he kind of shies away from it..but with mickey he can be as imploring and clingy and open as he wants :3
ian’s diagnosis is really the first time he’s really relegated out of his role in the elder trio: he has to build himself up from the ground. with fiona, i think this is just how she handles things; she checks if ian takes his pills daily, like she makes sure the kids grab their lunch on the way out the door. she’s pragmatic! it’s another thing added to her daily to-do list. we have to remember that although the gallaghers have witnessed monica’s bipolar episodes, they have not witnessed when someone is managing the disorder. fiona has little to no basis on what it’s going to look like for ian to be managing. of course her pragmatism makes ian feel infantilized and micro-managed because ian is not used to having so much attention / care focused solely on him…for someone that’s always handled responsibilities like ian has, this has really stripped him of his autonomy, which obviously frustrates him. in a way, i feel like fiona and lip may look at ian like he’s the ‘lucky one’: that he has confirmation now about how frank/monica has affected him, while fiona&lip are constantly waiting for their axe to fall. fiona wants to better herself to prove that she’s not stagnant in chaos like frank/monica, and lip wants to become a father to prove he’s not a negligent deadbeat like frank. ian, who has always been very goal-oriented, now feels he has his autonomy stripped from him. ian maintaining a sense of autonomy is actually something mickey is really good at fostering for ian Eventually lol. mickey is a control-freak of course so OF COURSE when ian gets out of the hospital mickey’s control-freaking ian’s pills and vitamins and what he can or can’t do while on the meds; but where ian and mickey can tussle and make-up, ian can’t do that with fiona. the resentment just grows…
i feel like ian’s major conflict with fiona is feeling like his autonomy is being compromised—either from not feeling he can confide in her, or that she’s being too overbearing/infringing on his choices. their s8-9 fight is a lot of compounding things, but it boils down to ian not feeling supported. fiona’s encroaching on the work he wants to do with the shelter, and this is coming off of ian losing two of the most important people to him, and feeling like he can’t openly grieve them, even to fiona: mickey and monica. and ian’s major conflicts with lip are the along the same lines: lip is judgmental of mickey and of ian’s choice for his future, s2 fight being the army and s6 being ian seemingly ‘giving up’ on himself and his prospects. these three never really had the opportunity to grow around each other while they were trying to grow up too fast to catch up to their responsibilities…but i feel like none of them can really hold a grudge against the others for too long because they don’t know life without each other. that scene in 706 of ian and lip joining fiona in her room to just shoot the shit and smoke makes me Emo
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