When he speaks, confirms what she had feared to be true, she’s stood in stunned silence for a few seconds. Almost all at once, she can see the turmoil of the future flittering into being before her eyes. Slowly, she shook her head. Refusing to accept what he was saying, refusing to admit the plan he had in his mind. No. She couldn’t let that happen again, no matter the consequences. She didn’t care what she had to do to make him pause and see sense. “Sam… Sam. You can’t do this. You can’t.” Her voice is filled with desperation as she rushes closer to him, places a hand on his arm. Her other hand reaches up, tentatively, resting on his cheek in order to urge him to look into her eyes. Eyes that were wide with panic, filled to the brim with fear. “We can thank of a better way, Sam. Death brings nothing but pain and misery. Killing your grandfather won’t help matters - if you remember the future, you must know that.” She bites her lip, trying to think through the blaze of her emotions. “We can find your dad. Together. Get him some place safe, before Cox can get to him. No killing needs to be involved.” She breathes out a shaky sigh, feeling tears brim which she refuses to let slip. “Please, please, just don’t go. I… I love you, Sam Spencer. So, please don’t go. Don’t make me stop you.”
“I have to.” He states matter-of-factly. “Sasha, I know him. He won’t stop.” In the perfect world, there might be other ways, ways that he can solve it without spilling blood. But in reality, sometimes there is no way out. Kenton Cox killed his own daughter for crossing him. Killing is the only way to put an end to this bad blood. Their eyes find each other. His eyes hold determination and certain anger. He can’t forgive Cox. He won’t. His look shifts subtly. It’s the part of him that hurts from hurting others, his scars and his guilt. Her words and her expression stab him in those parts what feel like weakness. She always finds the seams of his heart. Sam always did what he had to do to survive. In retrospect, survival itself was easy. Killing his own weak self, his fear and his humanity, time and time again, was not. At the end of that path, he did not expect anything else than staying alive. Love, certainly, was not on his list of things to pursue in life. But now, the girl he loves in a way he thought impossible stands in front of him, saying those words. He does not know what to make up it. He clenches his jaws as he swallows the tears, conceals his weakness. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened and could have ever possibly happened to me, Sasha.” He says quietly, letting out a weak breath “...But I screwed up. That year... I did, things to stay alive and to get to Cox. I’m not the same, and I can’t change that.” He pauses as he hangs his head down in shame. It’s unlike of him to say this much in length, about what he thinks or what he feels. But once the dam is broken, he can’t hold back anymore. “I thought forgetting everything would put it all behind, but it didn’t. It came back and-- now I can’t stop thinking about how Cox killed dad and that it would happen again if I don’t kill him first. I can’t stop. He’s a threat. I can’t ignore that. I need to do something about it.”
