⚠️language warning (aka Angel dust)⚠️
You and Alastor had been accomplices in life, partners.. perhaps even best friends.. Everyone knew of Alastor and Y/n- Why, you were the most listened to hosting duo of the whole New Orleans radio industry. However, what no one knew is that you and Alastor had gotten married shortly before your rise to fame. That is a story for another time though.. the only person in hell that knew Alastor had a wife was Husker.. yet he didn’t know who, Alastor kept that bit of information private. It wasn’t a secret really, but it never came up.
You showed up at the hotel after around a month of them opening, not as a patient but a worker. You were quiet and kept to yourself.. but everyone seemed to like you.
“Oh come on ya pimp- it’s just one lil’smooch.” Angel grins.. staring down at a very red Alastor. “No.. and if you don’t unhand me this instant, I’ll de-hand you.” The radio demon replies, tilting his head and grinning wider.
Angel rolls his eyes and ignores it, about to respond when Husk interrupts.. “Hey kid- I’d listen to him. He ain’t fuckin joking. I mean not that I care or anything but I don’t want any fucking spider guts on my bar. Got it?!”
Alastor takes advantage of the distraction, slipping away from the porn star..quickly dusting off his coat and fixing his hair. “You should follow Huskers advice..my effeminate fellow. After all~ I doubt my wife would approve of whatever nonsense you had in mind..” Alastor says, smirking.
Angel stares at him as if he grew a second head..finally screeching out “WIFE?? SINCE WHEN-WHAT THE FUCK??” His outburst causes Husker to groan in annoyance, staring at his near empty bottle of booze before growling “Oh here we fucking go- I don’t have enough booze for this shit.”
Alastor eyes the booze, summoning more and taking a glass of it while sighing and responding to Angel.. “Long before you were even born.. not that it’s any of your business.”
The spiders eyes widen and he startles the two old ‘friends’ by screeching again
Alastor rolls his eyes, murmuring “Is all this really neces-“ Angel however interrupts him again “CHARLIE GET OVER HERE ITS A EMERGENCY-“
‘Well, so much for privacy’ the radio demon thinks to himself and clinches his fists.
Charlie bursts into the room, panting and obviously in a panic. She sees the three all by the bar.. no fires nor bombs or emergencies of any sort. “Wh-Angel… what’s going on? This doesn’t look like a emergency.” She groans, tired of his shenanigans. “BABES THERE YA ARE-THE PIMPS GOT A WIFE!“ Angel frantically motions all of his arms at Alastor
“Oh for the last time Angel-I’m not a pimp!” The said demon growls out, turning his head to look at Charlie whom stares at him wide eyed.
“Wait- Alastor you have a wife”he opens his mouth to reply but gets cut off by Charlies growing excitement
“OhMyGoshWeNeedToMeetHer!! Please please please~” the radio host takes a step back.. eying the ball of excitement that is Charlie Magne
“Darling you’ve already-“ Alastor starts to explain only to be interrupted by Angel again.
“VAGGIE NIFTY Y/N GETCHA ASSES OVA ERE’.”he yells out, mere seconds later the door slams open “THIS BETTER BE IMPORTANT“ Vagatha groans as she enters the room, followed by Y/n and Nifty. Angel points at a mildly perturbed Alastor who is taking a drink of Huskers cheep booze while his smile twitches.
“YOU HAVE A WHAT?” Vaggie questions, glaring at Alastor. Nifty makes a loud gasping noise and runs up to Al, jumping up and down on the counter asking “Alastor why didn’t you tell us!? Who is she?? OH MY GOSH CAN I MEET HER??” The radio demon sighs, finally speaking. “Now calm down..If you’d let me expl-“ “What tonto del culo would marry you?!” Vaggie interrupts, not noticing nor caring that Alastors eyes have filled with static. Y/n walks up to the bar, patting Al on the back before stealing a bottle of booze for herself.
Charlie groans, grabbing her girlfriends hand gently. “Vaggie- be nice!”
“I’d watch your language.“ Alastor says in reply to Vagathas multilingual insult.
Husker looks between Y/n and Al before grumbling out a low “No fuckin way..”
Alastor glances back at the bartender, eyes wide and shaking his head slightly “Husker- my dearest friend~”
“Oh no- don’t fucking ‘Husker’ me. Oh you can’t even make this shit up- this is too good!”
Husk grins, laughing at his revelation.
Angel watches the three with curiosity before putting an arm around Husker and purring out, “da fuck are ya talkin bout husky?”
“One: Do not EVEr call me that again, two: get your hands off me, three: Al. Why don’t you go ahead and reintroduce everyone to the Misses?” Husker says smugly, chugging his drink.
Charlie frowns and looks over to Alastor questioning “Reintroduce?..”
The crimson haired demon glances around the room for a moment, squinting and smiling wider.. almost threateningly so when he locks eyes with a particular drunken cat and permanently aroused spider. Alastor straightens his coat and walks towards the group of misfits “Hmm..well it’s about time you all quieted down~” he chuckles, turning to you and beckoning you over with a clawlike finger.
“Darling.. come here.” He says softly, watching as you walk to his side.
Angel gasps in dramatic betrayal, throwing himself onto a chair and making weeping noises “Y/N HOW COULDYA GO AND STEAL MY MAN-“ Y/n eyes the spider humorously while Alastor steps farther back from him, growling in disgust “Angel..Would you kindly SHUT UP”
a soft static can be heard and the whole room quiets down allowing Alastor to speak.
“Ahem.. thank you. Now I’d like to formally introduce you all to Y/n.. my darling wife!”
Charlie gasps “Y/N?? oh my gosh!! My ship sailed before I even shipped it!”
Y/n smiles, “Hey gu-“ Vagatha grips Y/ns shoulders and stares at them suspiciously while whisper yelling, “IS HE HOLDING YOU HOSTAGE- ARE YOU OKAY?”
She shakes her head before saying “No he-“
Nifty interrupts, connecting the dots “Ohhh that makes sense!”
Charlie asks questions in rapid fire. “Why didn’t you tell us? This is so cool, how long have you two been married??”
Everyone looks around, noticing two now empty spots where Alastor and Y/n were.
