my mom is cockblocking my suicide attempt :/

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@sapphos-demon
my mom is cockblocking my suicide attempt :/
i am having dome Thoughts and i think i might start praying or meditating or maybe both. im not particularly religious over even that spiritual and like im still not sure how i feel abt the whole god thing. idk it may just be a stress response but it might be comforting idk
it is: dying alone hours
yknow when you’re just chilling then it hits you that youll never be enough for someone to love and you just :)))))
i wish i was a cow eating grass in a field just vibing🐄🌾✨
i woke up this morning to a thunderstorm and there was condensation covering my window as the sun was rising so it looked like the sky was raining rose gold with a mist of the same color and it was the most comforting feeling id ever felt. i hope i experience it just one more time.
kinda wanna hang out at the bottom of a pool rn
:( im actually a bad person but idek what to do about it
forehead bump
lmaoooo i wonder if im actually ever gonna date in college bc like...its a pwi...and im black...n these white ppl dont seem to fuck w/ black ppl fr...or theyll be fetishizers...sigh
everything feels so fucking out of my control its driving me crazy
i need to learn to shut up bc no one cares about what i have to say so im just wasting my breath
i wanna listen to one of my comfort artists but im conflicted bc i like their music but not so much them as a person soooo
me? dying alone? its more likely than you’d think
ive been fine all day why do i want to cry now???? the way i hate my brain
someone throw me off my room ill pay you
so was no one ever gonna tell me how ugly the font for my username looked on desktop or was i just supposed to find out by myself?