Hey I fucking suck and you probably do too

They say that in the end everything will be okay so I sit here waiting for it all to be over.

[satansrightnutsstuff]

Does anyone else just crave touch? I want slow kisses and fingers brushing down my back. All the innocence of it. I want someone to make me feel. I feel like I'm going crazy in my mind.

[subtleinspiration99]

Going Going Gone

It is worth it. I know it in this moment right now, as I listen to my younger brothers run around the house, laughing at the top of their lungs. Happiness pure and true happiness I can see it in their faces and feel it in their presence. I hope that maybe I can learn from these little three year old boys. It has been a while since I’ve found myself smiling uncontrollably, laughing and feeling as if I have the world in my hands. I miss the moments where I found myself feeling truly happy and content. I want, no I need to accomplish things in my life and that honestly is the reason I still sit here today, writing this. To me the most simple yet illogical thing is to run away. I am so amazed by the thought of leaving this place behind me, not saying a word or packing a single bag. I could leave now and no one would know enough to stop me until it is too late.

-Grace Lance 

[satansrightnutsstuff]

I'm back again. The lonely feeling I only deal with by promising myself I'll never be back. I've checked out of that room left the key on the desk. Only to find out the room is endless. Like the bottomless feeling in my stomach, the churning and spinning. All the while the audience behind me chants alone again, alone again, alone again..... close my eyes and I can mistake it for a heart beating ba doom ba doom.

[satansrightnutsstuff]

I drive a red car now. Nicer than the black one that was picky about when it liked to start. Nicer than the one that helped bring me the worst day of my life. I held my motionless and shaky breathing little brother in it. Blood on the both of us sharing the mess. Healed bodies, a red car, and driving still terrifies me. Every passing car every high beaming horn honking person who believes it just won't happen to them. I pray for you. I pray for myself. I'm one strong bitch.

[quotemadness]

“Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns. I am thankful that thorns have roses.”

— Alphonse Karr

[satansrightnutsstuff]

I'm only half me lately

I crave for someone or something to make me feel alive again. It's like my soul feels as if it can just up and leave my body. Trapping me here in my broken empty shell.

[satansrightnutsstuff]

Bath time

I used to beg my mother to run a bath for me. I wanted to splash around with bubbles and feel as light as they looked as they'd fly through the air accelerated by my excited puffs of air. Now I only crawl to the hot water when all I want to do is fall deep into the ground, into nothing. The bubbles are no longer for fun, only to hide my misshapen and ugly body. With water so hot it hurts I begin to feel alive.

[satansrightnutsstuff]

Sometimes I pretend that my thoughts and emotions are little ugly clown figurines. I hide them behind books and pray they'll shatter and be gone.

[satansrightnutsstuff]

I am a small person. Only about five feet tall, so how the fuck do you people think I can keep so much anger inside?

[zehrasky]

Yellow

I wear yellow the same shade of the sun

I used to draw in kindergarten class,

The yellow that brings a smile to my face.

I painted all my canvas yellow

Because I wanted to have reminders of happiness.

It worked for a while

Yellow became my favorite color

I have yellow dresses, yellow shoes and yellow ribbons

I also have yellow bags and yellow combs

All the possessions of tiny me are yellow

And it made me happy.

Once, having yellow things is enough

To make the darkness fade away.

Once, it was enough to make a smile

More real than the pain I feel.

Once it was enough

And then it wasn’t.

So I instead paint my nails pastel yellow

And suck on it when I feel sad,

I instead look for lemons

To swallow its yellow juice.

When that wasn’t enough

I swallowed yellow paint

Hoping to get the happiness inside of me

And when that didn’t work

I had hoped it would at least

Take away my miserable life.

It still wasn’t enough.

a.t.v

[books-n-quotes]

“Words, I think, are such unpredictable creatures. No gun, no sword, no army or king will ever be more powerful than a sentence. Swords may cut and kill, but words will stab and stay, burying themselves in our bones to become corpses we carry into the future, all the time digging and failing to rip their skeletons from our flesh.”

— Tahereh Mafi, Shatter Me

[secret-mind]

If you need someone to talk to, just message me or send an ask :-)

[opemain]

reblog if u need a hug

[bibliotecarul]

😞👐

[kishore4625-blog]

Why does this happen

Why do u make me be stranger in a place I belong

Why do you take away what I called mine

Why Am i a crying now inside a blanket when I should be sleeping

Where do I go if I am pushed to the edge

Where is my home

Where is my family

Whom do I cry to

Who is here now to console me

Whose lap can I lie down on

Who is here to hold me from falling apart

I am trying my best to be on my own but why do u make me regret my loneliness

Am I a sinner ?

If so please take me to hell but don’t make me live a hell in front of the little ppl who still believe I am happy

Kis Neo

[bighitgays-deactivated20170401]

I might not have any friends but u know what I do have???? That’s right, depression

[satansrightnutsstuff]

I'd give anything just to be held for a few hours right now.

[satansrightnutsstuff]

Mom who loves the world fighting for a better one for her children to grow up in. Too bad she's always busy now, never home. Always looking at a computer screen talking to people thousands of miles away no longer aware if her kids have eaten or the tears that slowly stream down their cheeks as they try to fight for some affection. The water might be clean though for a while so way to go mom. Too bad the problem will only come back. And your kids are only leaving.