࣪˖ ִ𐙚 about me ; writer , infj , 9teen , hufflepuff , eyekon , coer & shottie , bi , soft indie music enthusiast , she/her , wannabe film director , arya stark's gf (real)
࣪˖ ִ𐙚 fandoms ; harry potter , xo kitty , katseye , dead poets society , thunderbolts (& marvel) , game of thrones , ted lasso , my life with the walter boys , lngshot
࣪˖ ִ𐙚 current work ; at last , all of my works are easily accessible on @saturnsfics
tropes ; modern!au, boyband!au, poets are 18-20 years old
a/n ; eeek I'm so excited to share this with you! this is the start of a new au that I'm hoping to post a lot about on my page! I hope you like it <3
- after being formed in an american talent program in 2020, the dead poets society has since established themselves as a famous indie rock band with seven members!
- NEIL PERRY - lead singer #1
the sunshine who no one can quite figure out!
he's a golden retriever, he's sweet, he's kind but he's also the most mysterious band member of them all. no one knows much about his past or how he even got that magnetic singing voice of his. all the fans know is that he damn well knows how to hit a tune and that every time you see him on stage, it's hard to look at anything else.
he's full of surprises too. he will always pop up at the most random places (fans reported seeing him in the grocery store at 3 am or in italy on a random tuesday, performing somewhere in a dark bar etc.)! finding neil is kinda like finding a rare pokemon lmao. even though he's a superstar, he always manages to go on his lil side quests and no one will take that from him!
he's also pretty free with his clothing and isn't tied to a specific style. whenever he's about to participate in an event, there's always the question of "what will neil perry wear?". sometimes he wears dresses, sometimes he dresses emo, sometimes you'll see him in a white shirt and denim pants. you never know.
neil is also always down for anything and is the most versatile band member. one day, he could be pranking other band members with charlie and gerard or letting them dye his hair a random colour, the next he could be attending a serious press conference with cameron. or he'll go on a cute bookstore & coffee date with todd.
that versatility is also present in their music, cause his voice is literally suited for any type of song.
- CHARLIE DALTON - lead singer #2
playboy & rebellious. he'll be seen with a different girl every week and gets involved in the most scandals. whether it'd be drunkenly making out with one of his guy friends, wearing a mini skirt on a night out or drunkenly slapping a stranger with his purse, you name it, he's done it.
he's also sooo extra and needs to have things in a particular way. iced matcha latte with vanilla foam before a concert, only one particular brand of hairspray imported from germany, every single piece of his outfit approved by him before an outing (his stylist is exhausted).
and since we're on that subject, he's also the king of crop tops !! tight crop tops, loosely fit crop tops, white crop tops, black crop tops, ripped crop tops! he has a whole collection!
for every city they play in, he'll buy a crop top. also definitely has a whole set of the "i <3 london" and "i <3 new york" tops!
always flirts with interviewers or the crew. for him it's always just fun and games but he always has people falling left and right for him which has definitely caused some problems in the past.
also : infamous for his smirk which has probably been put into edits about a 1000 times. he just always looks so smug & hot with it likee!!
charlie's also always scheming something up with gerard!! they looovee to rage bait cameron bc it's so easy and it's so fun to watch him lose his composure lmaaooo.
management is always so done with them because they have to clean a lot of their messes. cause wdym he and gerard broke a street lantern on one of their nights out?? wdym they bleached their hair and dyed it pink??? wdym they thought it was a good idea to go to a random fan's birthday and get drunk out of their minds??
- TODD ANDERSON - lead singer #3
todd anderson, the sweet & quiet boy who turns into a completely different person once he's on stage. from barely saying anything in interviews and smiling shyly at the screaming crowds, he's suddenly a true, confident rockstar once he's behind a mic, animating the crowds to scream louder.
all the band members are suprised what kind of demon they've just unleashed simply by giving this boy a microphone and a stage lol!
when meeting his fans, he's more nervous than they are bc he's just so honoured that they like his band's music <3 !! if fans approach him he immediately starts fidgeting and adjusting his clothes. he just wants them to like him :(
he also overthinks everything he says on camera and rewatches all of their interviews, thinking "oh god why did I say that :c". todd thinks he's so awkward and weird when he's being recorded which...he kinda is lol but that's also part of his charm!
- KNOX OVERSTREET - lead guitarist
the hopeless romantic !! knox kinda lives in his own little pink fairy rainbow world and I love that for him! it also gives him an undeniable charm that makes all the other lover pink fairy rainbow fangirls go crazy. he's like the male love interest straight out of a romcom, almost a little too perfect in front of all the cameras and paparazzi.
he loves the little signs the fans make for concerts! he reads every single love letter, hugs every single fan and has buckets full of the stuffed animals they give him. he just loves his fans. he's also the member who's most likely to date one of them lmao.
he cares a lottt what the girlies think so in his free time he's always scrolling through twitter and looking at all the fangirl's opinions. one time, he saw a fan criticizing the clothes their stylist chose for knox & made a detailed post on how she'd style him instead and knox actually bought the clothes and thanked her TuT.
he also stays up late watching edits of him and liking every single one cause he needs his daily dose of himself lmao!! also sends all of the poets edits of themselves.
knox is the listener & advice giver of the group. cameron may be the most responsible one when it comes to making decisions but he can also be a bit judgy when it comes to being a listener (we listen and we DON'T judge cameron), so knox is the person everyone comes to the most for help. he loves it!
- GERARD PITTS - lead drummer
funny & a fan favorite, gerard makes everyone laugh! he always lightens up the mood at every concert, telling funny stories of what the band experienced prior to coming to the venue or jokes about cameron being an airport dad (forcing all of the members to give him their passports because charlie and knox would lose theirs within the span of minutes). together with charlie, he pranks all the members, especially cameron, always providing funny content for the social media channels.
he treats all of his fans like his friends and is always so excited to meet them.
him and charlie are also the most "emo" out of all the members, spiking their hair, putting on eyeliner etc. they'd be very experimental with their style and wouldn't be shy with trying something new.
I can imagine him being very shy when they first came into stardom, kinda like todd. I think it'd just be overwhelming to him, them suddenly winning all these prizes and performing in super large venues. at first, he'd hide behind the other members and his drums, always preferring to play on the back of the stage, almost invisible, just focusing on his own music.
but behind the shyness hides a true rockstar. after he warmed up on stage and got comfortable, you'd watch him absolutely shred it on the drums. shy gerard became gerard with the loudest laugh in interviews, gerard who partied with his fans, gerard with the bold outfits and gerard who became friends with everyone. his members, his crew and most importantly, his fans.
once he gets used to all the fame, he's able to transfer the confidence he has on stage into his life off stage. always scheming something up with charlie, standing up for the other band members when they got hate for something they did etc.
- RICHARD CAMERON - lead keyboardist & backup vocals
responsible & serious. cameron always worries for the safety of his fans. he will be the first one at a concert to call for a medic when someone has fainted and always makes sure enough water bottles are passed around the venue. despite being in an indie rock band, he can be very sensitive to noise so the screaming fans are sometimes a lot for him. when they first skyrocketed into fame, he tried to have "a calming presence" (lmfao) in hopes the fans wouldn't be as loud but no chance.
once in a bluee moon you get a picture of him covering his ears or flinching at the screaming fans. charlie never lets him live it down.
he also takes interviews and photoshoots veeery seriously!! he does not play about the public image of the band and often reminds them to mind their manners. for example if charlie sasses the press, cameron immediately pulls him away to tell him to stop so they don't get in trouble with their label.
he never causes any rumours and immediately shuts that shit down if he gets even slightly involved.
also literally the papa of the group! (a tired dad of the group taking care of his hyperactive children lmaoo) despite the band's busy schedule, he makes sure they celebrate all of the poet's birthdays properly, that they spend time together hanging out, that they resolve all their fights. he never wants them to stop being friends. ever.
management loves him because he never decides impulsively, is always punctual and focused and he often agrees with their decisions for the band.
- STEVEN MEEKS - lead songwriter and bass player
nerdy & creative. steven will always go very deeply into the meaning of their songs. in interviews, he will dish out what inspired the lyrics of the song, the story behind it etc.
he knows a lot about instruments and can play so many of them. he always geeks out over their equipment and always yaps about the new music stuff he splurged on with his rockstar money. the fans who relate a lot to their lyrics love meeks, cause well, he wrote them!
steven is also the cook of the band and always makes the most delicious stuff ever ughh. when he sees neil and charlie eating some crappy junk food, he immediately takes it from them and makes them something better. his love language is for sure food and rockstars need good fuel food!
he also kind of dresses like a grandpa with long coats and berets and ties and slacks. sometimes, when him and charlie stand next to each other you wouldn't be able to tell they're in the same band lol.
on tour, you will always find him reading a comic book! charlie's always like "whatcha reading" which he instantly regrets because meeks will go on for hours yapping about the plot of the book.
also kinda besties with knox.
- music videos
their first viral music video was to one of their debut songs "gotta do more gotta be more". the poets have a reputation for recording all of their music videos in different countries, so for "gotta do more gotta be more", they flew to italy and filmed in the dolomites for a week. they recorded a couple of scenes on some small farm in the middle of nowhere. the farmer's daughter was actually a huge dead poets society fan, so after filming, they had a bonfire with smores and sang some of their songs for her <3. some days where they couldn't film because it was too foggy, gerard and charlie spent the day helping out the farmer & learning how to milk a cow. they also had to muck out the stalls, which lead to charlie ruining his "precious louboutins".
gerard just laughed at him, saying "then why the hell are you wearing designer shoes to clean cow shit?"
well, at least the behind the scenes video was funny.
- concerts
epic. the tickets are almost always sold out immediately as soon as they're online. since they are pretty limited considering the size of their fandom, it's almost impossible to get them, no matter the size of the venue.
whenever they arrive at the venue they're playing at that night, there are already heaps of fans who have been waiting since the morning, screaming when they get out of the car and trying to grab them & touch them. neil is always the first one to jump out of the car and be like "hey guys! what's up? :D" and all the girlies just start screaming.
charlie's always like "ladieess! calm dowwnn" with the biggest smirk ever. gerard immediately walks up to the fans to sign the items they are are shoving in his direction. he asks them all sorts of questions like "what are you guys' names?", "where are you from?", "how long have you've been standing here? isn't it cold? do you need some blankets?" while they're just screaming and sobbing lmao. knox immediately clocks all the signs in the crowd that are about him & approaches the people holding them. he doesn't have all the time in the world so he only signs their things TuT. favoritism, much?
cameron however is standing on businesss!! he just quickly signs a few things and maybe gets in on or two pictures before instantly heading inside. sometimes he'd just nod at the crowd with a little smile. I feel like on a concert day, he'd be the first one to lock in, itching all day long for the concert to just start. at breakfast, he'd already be in his own little keyboard world, probably going over all their songs in his head. whenever someone tries to talk to him they'd literally have to shake him and be like "hellooo?? earth to cameron??" and he'd flinch. "huh?"
inside the venue, their setup is always iconic. they have their own instruments that they take to every concert and that they are very protective of! the venue probably gets a very detailed list of how to handle them & how to lift them, set them down etc. their instruments are just their babies <3
when the poets walk out on stage in their concert fits, all hell breaks loose. like I said before, gerard and charlie spike their hair together! they'd also totally do matching outfits with leather jackets or matching skirts if they're feeling rebellious.
sometimes, the whole band would be in matching fits though and they would fight over who wears it the best.
- fans & fan interactions
everytime the dead poets society arrives literally anywhere, there's screaming.
fans wanting pictures, autographs, a hug, eye contact etc!! it's a lot.
out of all of them, charlie probably handles it the best cause he loves the closeness with his fans and always feeds into the fangirl's delusions. he's very flirty with the crowds and doesn't mind being touched.
meeks and cameron prefer fan signs where they have the opportunity to actually get to know their fans and talk more deeply with them instead of just taking a quick picture and that being it.
their fans can be quite intense though.
cameron's the least "fan service" one out of all of them. he's very adamant about keeping a certain distance between him and the fans and keeps his life outside of the band very private. he would sometimes be seen with a girl on the outskirts of the town they're currently residing in. but whatever shot the paparazzi might get of her would be from a dimly lit restaurant, her face covered by a hoodie and sunglasses, with richard leaning over to whisper something in her ear. he'd spotted the cameras five minutes ago and had alerted his girlfriend immediately of course. he knew some fans had probably seen them (he'd heard the quiet gasps coming from the corner of the restaurant), then posted about it, which lead to the paparazzi arriving. but cameron is insanely protective of his personal life and he does not play about his girlfriend! he immediately gets the check and they get tf out of there!
so yeah, ever since then, he's been extra paranoid and mistrusts the fans a little. he just doesn't like the screaming that much and prefers the quiet & respectful fans. he will always approach the shy ones who aren't as pushy but who also want a picture / an autograph!!
neil and gerard thrive off of the loud fans tho!! I feel like they would be the type to scream and fangirl with them lmaooo!! neil would also totally glaze the other poets and would be like "knox looks so good tonight doesn't he?" like bro we get it you're gay lmao (psst it's a secret tho). but he also just loves his friends and always hypes them up.
when they first became famous overnight, steven had to get used to all the female attention he suddenly got because before, girls wouldn't even look at him. so sometimes when there's a lot of screaming fangirls he's still like "woah is this real?"
once, management probably forced him to wear contact lenses instead of glasses to give him a "new look". poor boy couldn't see for weeks so he'd always be squinting in every picture, blinded by the flashing lights of the cameras. the band put those pictures of him as all of their lockscreens & their group chat picture.
- tour life / promo tours
tour life is so messy but also so much fun!! the tour bus is always the messiest place with 7 adolescent boys living in it and the team tries so hard to keep it at least a lil clean but always fails. there's clothes everywhere, empty bags and food containers, fan letters and suitcases full of plushies and gifts. also, the poets always take at least 5 polaroid cameras + film with them on a tour, so they can always take silly pictures on the bus or on stage.
on the tours, they're almost always on a pretty tight schedule, meaning that whichever city they visit, they never really have time to explore. however, neil is infamous for making it his priority to see at least one sight from the city they're currently in. because wdym he's in paris and he's not going to see the eiffel tower? that's like going into a kebab shop and buying a salad.
so, he makes time for those things. maybe misses half an hour of the soundcheck (eh, so what?), but always comes back with local treats for all the members to try. the team always scolds him because he's a lead singer and how are they supposed to do sound check without the singer? but they're never mad for long, cause how can you stay mad at neil? it's impossible. he just gives them an apologetic smile with those puppy dog eyes and hands them a sweet treat, so they're like "finee, off you go" lols.
neil might also swap sleep for sightseeing, coming to breakfast with only having slept 3 hours and still being the most energetic one out of all of them, a grin on his face and bags of souvenirs in his hands. and charlie's like "HOW?! WHERE?? WHEN?!! WITHOUT ME??". the other members used to keep asking him how he did it until they found out he could count the hours of sleep he got one hand and basically survived off of sunshine, rainbows, redbull and a dream.
of course, seven boys living together on a tour bus for several months straight is bound to create some beef. especially because they're all best friends and know each other in and out.
we all know charlie and knox definitely have the most annoying habits like leaving their stuff everywhere which cameron would get soo annoyed at!! he's the cleanest out of all of them and never forgets to throw things in the trash or to put his things back where they belong. so he would of course get in a fight with them about it.
also, steven and cameron neeed their personal space, which can be hard in a tiny, cramped tour bus. but the poets know it's best to give them some space after a long day because you do not wanna deal with an overstimulated cameron or meeks. trust me.
they never stay mad at each other for long though and always make up with each other quickly ("never go to bed mad" ahh). like you'd see them have a screaming match in the morning and three hours later they'd be laughing with their arms around each other.
- interviews
don't take gerard and charlie to an interview where there are mini games involved. they will take it way too seriously and get mega competitive. if either of them wins even one round, they'd act like little boys, doing a victory dance & lap around the studio. charlie once got a little too comfortable and shouted "ha! take that you lowly peasants!". and the interviewer's just laughing awkwardly and thinking who the fuck did we just invite on the show.
however, steven is really good at the quiz stuff and the trivia games! if they're ever playing some sort of knowledge game and need to split up into teams, everyone is always fighting over who gets steven on their team because he always wins.
and you can always get charlie with a gossipy game like never have I ever or truth or dare. bro will drink at every single question tho because even tho he's only 18, dude has done a shit ton of things.
neil and cameron love those "who's most likely to" questions because they just love to talk about the band and their dynamic, sharing funny moments or little behind the scenes stories. neil is obviously a great story teller and whenever he shares something from their daily lifes, everyone is always glued to his lips.
and todd would thrivee on one of those puppy interview things. you'd have so much footage of him being completely absorbed by the pups and playing with them <3. sometimes he gets very nervous, so he'd actually prefer the type of interviews with an audience behind the camera (like the tonight show with jimmy fallon), because it calms him down knowing the fans are there, cheering him on.
- dating rumours
of courseee todd and neil have so many dating rumours about them. meanwhile these two idiots are just quietly pining over each other, stealing glances at each other during concerts, cuddling on the tour bus late at night and yapping to a trusted band member about the other person, whining about how much they want each other. obviously, gerard and charlie plot something to give them a lil push, locking them in together on the tour bus for an entire night while the band goes out.
when they come back, they find neil and todd fast asleep in each other's arms in neil's bed. charlie and gerard high five and cameron owes them 10$.
however, they decide to keep their relationship under wraps, fearing that they will lose fans if they make them being a couple and their sexuality public. they have a big meeting with the band & their management about it and decide keeping it a secret is what's best for the band. charlie is against it, wanting his friends to be loud & proud about who they really are and not having to hide because of some delusional fans. he gets into an ugly fight with cameron, who's ever the practical one and who, of course, agrees with management. gerard literally has to pull them apart and todd is surprised how passionate his friends can get about who he kisses.
charlie storms out of the room, gerard and neil following suit and he needs to be calmed down for several minutes before getting back in, reluctantly agreeing to keeping everything under wraps. they probably put one of them or both of them in some pr relationship to avoid further suspicion.
knox of course thinks this is the right moment to be annoying. "soo since they're getting pr relationships can y'all put me in one with adriana lima or sum" bro sybau...
- festivals
charlie is always the social butterfly at festivals, making connections with other bands & artists. when they're not performing, he's somewhere chatting up a new celeb, living up to his reputation of being the #1 extrovert of the group. sometimes, some of the members come with him to chat to some people and they'll just watch him set his eye on someone, walk up to them with the biggest, proudest grin, extend his hand and be like "hey, i'm charlie :D". and then in a span of one minute the other person's already looking at him like he hung the fucking moon or something. neil always asks him how he does it but charlie never gives it away.
knox would absolutely hate coachella. "why am I in the middle of the desert, sweating my balls off and wearing some fuck ass leather jacket?" and charlie's just like "sometimes you have to sacrifice comfort for style, knoxious. deal with it."
when they're done with their perfomance, though, they all party together and get a little wild. festivals the one time where management isn't watching their every move and where they can be free for a couple of days. you'd see them at all the shows, jumping in the crowd and screaming their favorite songs, finally being the teenagers they still are.
"what happens at coachella stays at coachella" is literally charlie's motto and his and the rest of the poet's mission would be to get cameron to loosen up, to let go a little, just this once. and once they do, he'd be unrecognizable lol. if some fans came across them, asked where cameron was and the poets would just point at him (black eyeliner, hair all messy and wearing clothes he would rather be caught dead in infront of paparazzi) and they're just like "WHAT??" lmao
seeing the poets at a festival would mean seeing who they really are behind the fame.
- bonus.
- songs I think they would have ; reflections - the neighbourhood, caroline - sombr, undressed - sombr, we never dated - sombr , caramel - conan gray , who's your boyfriend now? - royel otis, friends - chase atlantic
if that isn't ms joan goodwin from atmosphere by taylor jenkins reid personified then I don't know what to tell you. also amazing book you all need to read it!!
hi guys!! I just wanted to give y'all a heads up that it will probably get really quiet on this blog come next week because I'm going away to work on an island for the summer and won't have a lot of time to write! I will be back in august though and will probably publish one more thing before I leave!
summary ; steven meeks and his wife live blissfully.. until war knocks on their door
songs ; at last by etta james, caroline by sombr, for emma by bon iver, mystery of love by sufjan stevens, would that I by hozier, spring into summer by lizzy mcalipine, heal by tom odell, harvest moon by neil young
a/n ; started writing this piece last autumn and rediscovered and finished it today. safe to say I've been in the feels all day :,)
life with steven meeks is like the trope where the beautiful and kind wife dies at the beginning of the movie and you only get a few scenes with her. short clips of sunlight and laughter, tinged with a bittersweet taste of nostalgia. it's over before you know it, just a short span of time before the real action begins.
that described the time you had spent together pretty well.
right after you married, you spent a few months just living in bliss together. buying a house in the countryside, settling into the neighbourhood as the young married couple with the unusual last name and befriending the neighbours. they would half-heartedly roll their eyes at you, muttering something about "young love" when they'd see you dancing and giggling at the town's fair with steven spinning and twirling you around. to steven, you looked like an angel with your hair flowing in the summer's breeze and your lacey dress making pretty shapes whenever he spun you around.
your neighbours would groan at the giggles that could be heard from your house in the middle of the night, waking up to find a bag of cookies at their front porch, the result of your late night baking shenanigans. they would huff and puff when melodies of your singing and the same song over and over trailed to their house and when they had to (yet again) watch steven look at you like you hung the damn moon.
and yet as much as they were annoyed with the two of you, you reminded them of how they were when they had just married. the young lovebirds from next door.
you had your moments together, your very own movie worthy scenes. you spent summer evenings at the lake, bathing in the sunset and jumping from the pier together.
sunny mornings in bed, with warm light filtering through the thin white curtains, drinking coffee that was way too sweet and laughing about messy hair in the morning. burnt pancakes, light pink laundry that was meant to stay white, falling asleep at the kitchen table where you had tried to do your taxes but couldn't for the life of you stay awake in the process, staying up way too late looking at the stars in your backyard and having to drag each other out of bed the next day. getting excited when you managed to keep your first plant alive and not having to watch it die a slow death like all your other ones. steven insisting on celebrating its first birthday. having your third toaster explode in a week.
a life you were both figuring out together.
you'd throw summer parties in your garden, with lanterns and homemade lemonade, inviting the poets and steven's colleagues from his new job. charlie complements your cooking and chris and knox show you pictures of their newborn.
later that night, when the sun's brilliance has finally faded and the sky has turned a midnight blue, you slow dance to your song playing softly in the background. you'd find nothing but love and softness in his eyes, his hands on your waist and a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
the next morning, the letter from the army came.
it was sudden for the both of you, he didn't expect to be called in so soon and especially at such an inconvenient time. you two were happy and the last thing he wanted was to leave. but the letter came anyway, putting a rather abrupt stop to the life you had built with each other.
it would be early in the morning, on a rather crisp and foggy morning when he'd tell you. you would find him sitting in the living room before the sun had even risen, his head in his hands with a piece of paper in front of him. when you ask what's wrong, all he can do is look at you sadly, his eyes red from having cried. and you know. you know they've finally written to him, the thing you'd dreaded having finally happened. war had started and they needed all the men they could get.
you sob in his arms for hours.
when you send him off, all you feel is numbness. your eyes seem to become an endless pool of tears.
he sends you beautiful love poems and letters to tell you how much he misses you. he also carries a picture of you in his pocket at all times, a candid of you wearing your wedding dress with the brightest smile on your face.
when he hears the bombs and missiles above his bunker, he likes looking at it, remembering that day.
he comes home in the summer and it's nearly too much. there are new scars on his face and even though he lights up as he sees you, it doesn't quite reach his eyes, which have lost their usual spark. there's a certain dullness to them, a weariness that seems to have spread through his entire
body. it seemed as though his entire soul was tired. sometimes you'd catch him staring off into the distance, a solemn look on his face that you'd only ever seen on his face when his father had passed way two years ago. he started hugging you tighter, pulling you closer when you'd fall asleep after a long day.
you only have two weeks together and you try nursing him back to health. you drive to the lake where you had spent so many afternoons together, the summer fair where you'd shared your first kiss. he comes back to himself, piece by piece, but you know that he has seen and done things you could never erase, no matter how much love you poured into him.
"come back to me", you say to him before he leaves, a pleading look in your eyes. he nods.
"I will", is what he promises. "I'll always come back to you."
you never knew that was the last time you'd see him.
he's shot on a snowy winter's day and he bleeds out under a weeping willow, facing a frozen lake. he smiles at the beauty of it, thinking of how you always loved the snow. he remembers your first christmas together and how excited you had been because of the snow in your backyard. you had made two snowmen, one for him and one for you and had put the autumn's last red leaves atop the head of his snowman so that it could have red hair, just like him. you'd spent the day playing in the snow like two little kids, chasing each other through the garden in a snowball fight and hiding behind the broad fir tree when your neighbour had come out to see what all the noise was about. steven muffled your giggles with his cold glove and when you just couldn't seem to stop, he rolled his eyes, smiling despite himself, and kissed you.
he doesn't know if it's the cold making his mind hazy but the last thing he sees is you, walking towards him in the snow, wearing his favorite summer dress of yours. the one with the white lace you'd worn so many times when the two of you had gone dancing. he wonders if you aren't cold but you crouch down to him, smiling, and tuck a bloody strand of hair behind his ear. he swears he feels your hand on his cheek and his heavy eyes try to blink to see if you are real or just a figment on his mind.
he never opens them again.
he passes away before you can live the life the two of you always wanted with each other. your wardrobe full of colorful dresses and skirts which he used to love so much turns into an ocean of black. your house turns into a grave of your memories.
