★ ‧₊˚ ⋆ jessica chastain. cis woman. she/her … now playing: girls against god by florence + the machine — oh , that ? might be helena flores sauer , a forty - seven year old finance officer at town hall who’s been hanging around wicklow ridge for around thirty two years , just long enough to stir up some trouble if you ask me. they’re a regular at everwood café , always going on about “you want a better story. who wouldn’t?” like it’s gospel. around town , folks say they’re clever & tenacious — but when they think no one’s listening ? it’s more like untrusting & merciless. are the rumors true ? maybe not … but it sure makes life around here a little more interesting.
— ❤️🩹 — pinterest, musings, starters.
known connections ( so far! aka, ones people around town might know ) emilio "milo" flores, ex husband. maisie flores, daughter (15). orientation, availability bisexual & not actively looking for anything. she's rather burnt out on all things romance. prominent traits clever, resentful, tenacious, untrusting, logical, merciless, gutsy, calculating, unfazed, attentive, stubborn, poised, bold. twinnies, kinnies, etc wendy byrde ( ozark ), nancy wheeler ( stranger things ), katniss everdeen ( thg ), gerri kellman ( succession ), naomi lapaglia ( the wolf of wall street ), honey best ( the incredibles ), sasha williams ( the walking dead ), the angriest dog in the world by david lynch, mama bears, the warm and quiet glow of the rising sun, stray cats with sharp claws, and the dull ache of a lingering bruise.
helena's story doesn't have a pleasant start. her father was a hateful, selfish, abrasive son of a bitch. her mother was checked out of life, resigned to taking the path of least resistance, and intent on making sure helly chose it, too. it didn't stick, of course. helena was a ball of fire: full of life, energy, and a dogged determination to fight.
her childhood is marked by screaming matches, slammed doors, and going it alone. there isn't anything anyone can tell her that she hasn't already heard before; nothing anyone can do that will scare her. it made her strong, a hyper - independent and bold woman, but it also made her deeply resentful. if they were her parents, why couldn't they be her parents? why did she, the child, have to be the strong one?
unsurprisingly, her father couldn't hold down a job, and he insisted on dragging them from place to place between stints. the constant moving was difficult at first, but her life had always been unstable, and so she eventually grew used to being untethered. in a way, it was kind of freeing ( #copium ). she was a free bird, flying from place to place, doing and being whatever she pleased. she would be gone in a year anyway, so who cared what anyone thought of her? helly marched through this world like she owned it and no one could tell her otherwise.
she was fifteen when they moved to wicklow ridge. loath as she was to admit it, she loved it ( which she hated because she knew that would make moving even worse ). once the first year was up, she was fully ready to hear the news that they'd be leaving again, only for it to never come. they stayed for another year more, and then another, and another still. for once, it seemed the sauer bunch had finally settled.
by the time high school graduation came around, helly was itching to leave. she didn't know what she wanted to do just yet, but she knew she wanted to pursue something stable. she went to a state school and eventually landed on... accounting. yeah. was she expecting that? no. but she liked it well enough — liked anything that would prevent her from living the same life her parents had. she saved her electives to explore things that truly interested her, like photography, history, art, and literature. she practically lived in that library.
helena had been looking for work near her school after graduation when she got a call from her mom saying she was getting a divorce. her mom, who had always bowed her head and gone along with everything her father said. her mom, who had never been on her own before. her mom, who had finally apologized for never taking her side. blindsided, and less resistant to the idea of going back home now that her father was out of the picture, helly tentatively decided she'd return to help her out, see if anyone was hiring in the meantime.
not long after, one fateful trip to the book nook brought emilio flores into her life. part of her would like to be romantic and say the next two decades of her life were a blissful blur, but that would be inaccurate. it wasn't a blur. helena remembers everything with crystal clarity: their exciting start, blissful middle, and explosive end. helena loved being his wife, and she loved being a mother — two things she had always been so terrified of, so sure that they would never be meant for her. she loved him and the life they'd made for themselves up until the cracks grew too large and it all shattered at their feet.
infidelity. helena couldn't believe it. she still can't. it never made sense to her. she was a beautiful, smart, and capable woman. she always put her family first, always supported them in everything they did. she was the mother of his child. for god's sake, she was helena fucking flores sauer. she was not the kind of woman you cheated on. ... or so she once thought.
all too aware that this was not something you came back from, helena promptly called it quits once he confessed. she had been a fool to stay for as long as she had, hopeful to the point of delusion that they would get through this eventually, and she wouldn't continue to put her daughter through that. she couldn't.
their divorce was finalized a year ago, and helena has been living in a haze since then. half of her life, who she thought she was and could be — all of it went down the drain just like that. it's like childhood all over again: being untethered, being angry, being forced to fake it till she makes it. she keeps her head held high for her daughter, for herself, and moves like everything is perfectly fine. like she hasn't failed at this: being a mother, a wife, a woman worth wanting. like she isn't terrified of fucking things up for maisie. like she isn't a bird who trembles atop its perch, the cage door ripped off its hinges. everything is fine. it isn't, and hasn't been for a long time, but she has to pretend like it is. she has to.
personality helena is a free bird. she says what she means, does what she wants, and yields to no one. her mind is always whirling, eyes always seeing more than she lets on. she's purposeful in everything she does — never careless, especially not with others. she can be a teasing little shit or a callous bitch, just depends on you ( but she hates having to be an ice queen, so please don't make her 💔 ). serves mama bear mommy realness and will mother you without meaning to. would sooner eat her own hand than let anyone see her bleed / likes vulnerability in others while hiding her own. born to be a ride or die, forced to master detachment. other tidbits carries herself with the grace of a cat. talks a smidgen low and slow, forcing you to listen good. out-bitches judgy parents on local facebook groups because fuck 'em. applied for the finance officer gig six months ago like thirty minutes before the deadline thinking she wasn't actually going to get it. did indeed get it. has the kind of gaze you can feel. always dolled up and you will never catch her with chipped polish. an amateur photographer who enjoys taking pictures of the people and things she loves. has her daddy's temper. actually likes a good chatterbox and welcomes infodumps. shortie. spoils her daughter because she can. has a wicked sweet tooth. definitely is not repressing all of her emotions regarding her divorce only for them to show in other ways, like weight loss, sleepless nights, and stress.
WANTED CONNECTIONS —
FRIENDS! all of the friends. best friends / girlfriends. friends she lost in the divorce. friends that she did not lose in the divorce but it's different now. high school friends ( she was a social butterfly, but mostly hung out with the ne'er-do-wells ). college friends. unlikely friends. friends who are more like siblings. friends who are reconnecting. friends who drifted apart. new friends / blossoming friendships. people who randomly shared a vulnerable or intimate moment once and they're not really friends but that shit was so #real it kind of feels like they're not not friends.
fellow parents and / or divorcees!
milf enthusiasts wya? 🫦🙏 is she looking for anything? no. but! i think she can have a little treat anyway. maybe. what this would mean or look like is 100% muse and vibe dependent. doesn't even have to be anything fr. could be an almost something. an animal awareness that they haven't acted on. a friendly outing that felt a little more than friendly. something she alleges was a lapse in judgment and will never happen again ( ok ms girl... ). lonely people being a little less lonely together. idk! open to anyone.
mentor / mentee type relationship. maybe your muse is on the younger side and helena acts like a supportive figure to them? be prepared for some tough love, though. honestly, they don't even have to be younger. anyone is welcome to apply. it'd be nice to focus on someone else's problems instead of her own.
someone she always sees around town, whether it's at everwood café, crystal springs, miss glamourpuss, or something like that.
literally anything that comes to mind! i typically say yes to everything tbh. don't be shy! 🫶
