"How did the appointment go?"
James settled onto the sofa beside Sirius and handed him a steaming mug of tea.
Sirius accepted it with a quiet thanks, staring down into the cup as the amber liquid rippled from the movement. He didn't drink it. He just watched it settle while James waited beside him.
James tipped his head, "Just fine?"
Sirius gave a small, uncertain shrug.
"I thought..." He searched for the words. "I thought I'd be more excited. Seeing it, I mean."
Sirius let out a slow breath, "I'm still scared."
The admission came quietly.
James stayed silent, knowing Sirius would keep talking if he wasn't interrupted.
"What if I mess everything up?" Sirius whispered. "What if I'm not cut out for this? Gods, James... I never thought I'd have to think about any of this."
He carefully set the untouched tea on the coffee table before it slipped from his hands.
"And now everything's changing."
James nodded thoughtfully, "How's Remus handling it?"
Sirius couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth.
"Gods..." He rubbed at his eyes. "He's handling it better than I am."
"He keeps telling me he wants whatever I want," Sirius continued. "That if I decide I can't do this, he'll support me. If I decide I can, he'll support me."
He leaned sideways until his head came to rest against James' shoulder with a tired sigh.
"But he's terrible at hiding how excited he is."
"He tries so hard to keep his own feelings out of it because he doesn't want me to feel pressured."
Sirius laughed softly through his nose. "And he's absolutely rubbish at pretending."
"Every appointment..." Sirius murmured. "Every scan. Every time we hear something new..." He smiled despite himself. "His eyes light up."
James reached up, absentmindedly running a hand through Sirius' dark hair.
"And he's allowed to be happy," Sirius said quickly. "He should be happy."
"I just hate that he's trying so hard to make sure I'm okay that he barely lets himself enjoy any of it."
For a while, neither of them spoke.
Rain pattered steadily against the windows.
Finally James broke the silence.
"So..." He kissed the top of Sirius' head. "What are you going to do?"
Sirius closed his eyes, "I think..."
He exhaled slowly. "I think I'm just going to embrace it."
He laughed weakly, "I've never wanted kids."
"No," James agreed gently. "But you've always been good with them."
Sirius snorted, "Being good with children doesn't automatically make me a good mumā"
"Dad," James corrected without hesitation.
Sirius looked up at him. A smile broke through despite the tears threatening his eyes.
"I'm still figuring out how that works."
"It works however you want it to work, Padfoot."
James gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze.
"You don't stop being you just because you're carrying a baby."
Before Sirius could answer, the front door opened.
A gust of cool, rainy air swept into the house as Remus stepped inside, shrugging off his rain-soaked jacket before kicking off his shoes.
"Well," he called from the entryway, carrying two grocery bags, "they didn't have the chocolate you wanted, so I stopped at Publix and found the same brand there, and I grabbed those sour gummies you've been craving too becauseā"
The smile on his face faded the moment he saw Sirius.
He immediately set the bags down.
Sirius stood before Remus could reach him and wrapped both arms around his waist, burying his face against his husband's shoulder.
Remus hugged him just as tightly.
Remus kissed the side of his head. "You don't have to pretend with me."
Sirius looked up at him then, his eyes still damp but calmer than they had been a few minutes earlier. He leaned in and gave Remus a soft kiss.
When they pulled apart, Sirius rested one hand over the small curve of his stomach.
"You..." His voice caught for just a second. "You can tell your parents."
For a heartbeat he simply stared.
His grin was already threatening to escape despite his obvious attempt to stay composed.
Sirius nodded, "I'm sure."
Remus looked at him for another moment before his gaze dropped instinctively to Sirius' stomach, his expression filling with a kind of wonder he'd been trying so hard to hide for weeks.
