Opinion: People don't need to be "good" in order to deserve basic human compassion.
Treating people poorly because they're "bad" can actually lead to even more destructive behavior, coupled with poor coping mechanisms that may prove fatal. That's not my background in abnormal psychology studies talking. That's me, the person behind the screen. I've always tended towards, for example, Slytherin House, Team Valor, the factions with the bad reputations... not to be cool or edgy, but because I know what it's like to be ostracized and unwanted. I know many of you will relate to me on this, and it brings me comfort to know I'm no longer alone. I grew up with a few different disabilities and disorders. I was bullied in school and, whenever I retaliated, I was the one punished for bad behavior. I was suspended and expelled from so many schools, for what I saw as "trying to stand up for myself when no-one else would." My family was... critical, to put it kindly. I was a straight-A student for most of my academic career. 100%, A+, got me praise and affection. Anything less, even 98%, was met with disappointment and "What did you do wrong?" I was a dutiful student and I was embarrassingly obedient as a child, at least until it came to not retaliating. I was labelled a problem child because I had a TEMPER. Actually, what I had was an undiagnosed personality disorder that no-one knew how to name or treat back then. So they punished me for it. I became the type of person who was afraid to get attached to anyone. When I did have a friend-- usually just the one, maybe two if I was really lucky-- I was extraordinarily jealous and protective of our time together. Those friendships didn't tend to last long as a result, so I went through life feeling abandoned, because I was too young to really comprehend what I was doing wrong. I could have easily become just as evil as any villain you see in books, movies, or TV. Actually, in my mid-teens, some would argue that I was, and I wouldn't disagree. I remember trying to invite classmates to my 16th birthday party; the teachers told them not to come, and the parents threatened to call the police. When I was 19, I got back in contact with someone I'd hurt. I apologized and explained to them how karma had gotten me back. This person has the most amazing, loving heart of anyone I've ever met. She forgave me, sat patiently with me (both online and in person) through many outbursts and meltdowns, helped me process relationships where others were causing more damage to me and my personality. Without the compassion and kindness she showed me, I could have spiralled and been an even worse person than I'd been before. In my life, I've been abused and taken advantage of in every possible way. I could have easily succumbed to misanthropic nihilism, and for a time, I did. When my friend dropped contact with me in our mid-teens, she made it clear that I was actually the worst. After a period of self-pity, followed by a period of self-loathing, I noticed there were so many kind, pure, loving people I would have loved to be friends with, but they didn't want anything to do with me because of my awful reputation. So after some time, I decided to try to become better. I wanted HER forgiveness, and the fact that she granted it several years later was just so extraordinary to me. It's what pulled me back from the brink. She's guided me towards becoming a better person bit by bit. I need people to understand that that is a PRIVILEGE I was granted. Not everybody has that kind of connection in their life. Not everyone HAS SOMEONE who can model healthy behavior or offer unconditional love. That is why I'm so quick to offer compassion and forgiveness towards villains. I'm analytical of their behavior and the *reasons* behind why they do what they do. I can be sympathetic and compassionate without CONDONING their actions, and that's a nuance that I feel is lost to a lot of people, if some of the fandom discussions I've been witnessing are any indication. Unfortunately, that also means I've gotten hurt a lot by continuing to give people the benefit of the doubt long after it became unhealthy and unreasonable to do so. After they'd already shown me their true colors. I try to see the best in people because someone saw the flickering possibility of good in me. And once someone betrays my trust, well... that's their mistake to make, I guess. I'm here to encourage empathy, not make threats right now. I was, due to a series of misfortunes and traumas inflicted on me, once a horrible person. Someone showed me persistent compassion and kindness, and I was careful not to throw it back in her face once I understood how valuable that kindness was. That's it, that's the point of this essay. My favorite characters are the people I most see myself in, whether old or new. Make of that what you will. And PLEASE, try to let people have opinions on THEIR favorite characters, factions, what-have-you, without making judgment calls about their personal morality. Don't be tacky 💚