TW@M, Tumblr Edition

[scottneelan]

The Bridge That's Burning

There’s a lesson in everything and maybe someday I’ll learn (ince I keep repeating the same mistake) There comes a time and place to turn and walk away before the bridge that’s burning collapses under my feet and the river carries me far from where I’m going Somehow I keep getting stuck in the gaps between and watching helplessly as it falls apart like every one before

[scottneelan]

I'll Find A Way

I’ll find a way if for no other reason than to spite you and the words you wield so sharply If you care so little I’ll walk away and you won’t have to worry about either of our failure You’re nothing of who and what you used to be and I refuse to let you be the albatross around my neck that drags me down

[scottneelan]

The Heart of Everything

I don’t know what I’m doing if I ever really did I just keep moving in the same direction hoping someday I’ll find it Whatvere it is that I’m supposed to without actually understanding what it is or where I’m going One day closer to the end whatever that might mean feeling far too lost and hopeless No idea where this wind blows except to push against me and this weight of the…

[scottneelan]

Without Me

Never quite enough not to matter no one sticks around left to drift on through a world that ever turns Sun rises, sun sets, nothing happens nothing ever changes No meaning no importance no lasting impact no impression no future Nothing sacred only wasted time I’m just wasting time waiting for the end as everyone and everything moves on without me

[scottneelan]

Absence

It’s been a year today and it somehow feels like each and every one So much has happened and so much feels different for nothing of importance to have changed Still in the same place trying to fill the emptiness Going through the motions of a world that looks much darker and a life you left behind too soon Same old same old when it’s all just a little less than the day before Still…

[scottneelan]

Tear Away

Don’t worry the hole you left behind when you walked away is still there In fact it’s only gotten bigger in your absence It’s just not worth filling when everyone that stands there always finds a reason to leave And every time they tear away another piece of who and what I am and drag it off with them A little less of me stays standing day by day a little less sure a little less…

[scottneelan]

Right

It’s not always easy to be proven right When you share your deepest worries only to see the one you trusted make them come true Was I wrong to say it then? In the end I saw it coming despite all her denials and now it’s been how long? Feels like an eternity like she’s a remnant of another life another world I never lived in only dreamed of I knew she would disappear those words…

[scottneelan]

Visions of the Past

It seems like a lifetime ago when visions of the past creep up and take hold Heart racing and stomach churning as memories flash by like your life when death comes calling I can’t shake the feeling can’t get past the failures that haunt me People and places lost in my life no longer except when they decide to appear again at random and trigger fight or flight

[scottneelan]

Disappear

What hurts most is the bitterness The anger festering underneath the surface that the thought of you or the site of your name brings rushing forward This what you’ve left me with when I became too much We were just like family much like a shitty workplace Family so long as some value can be found But once the well runs dry you move on and I’m still here still dealing with the…

[scottneelan]

Schedule

We schedule each day each week, month, year, as if they’re promised and as long as we have something coming we’ll find our way there But nothing is for certain no matter how we fill the spreadsheet We can arrange the future all we wish move plans and thoughts and appointments like points on maps or flow charts but there’s still no guarantee and all the empty assumptions won’t make the…

[scottneelan]

Walked Away

It seems like such a waste losing touch with something that felt so important then Guess it doesn’t matter now as they slip to memory There are much more pressing thoughts that I should be busy having than to worry about someone that walked away

[scottneelan]

Wrong

Another wasted day another empty year and one pointless breath after another Is there even a reason? Or is this all some grand illusion a cosmic joke without a punchline? Well I’m not laughing I’m suffering through Crawling through this tunnel and there’s not even the light of an oncoming train No point no purpose, Just pain and then nothing and when nothing is the best you can hope…

[scottneelan]

Such Great Distance

Feels like forever since these words last crossed my lips Somehow it seems like yesterday and yet another lifetime I wonder how we got here so far from where it all began Late nights under starlight Drives and dives and endless potential a long and winding road that led us completely different directions But we still have those moments and memories to tie us together across such great…

[scottneelan]

Place

Thank you I really needed the reminder I was starting to believe I might actually matter But what’s the old line? (the one I always hated) Something about what you get for thinking… I bought into the platitudes and somehow forgot my place is that I don’t have one Not anymore

[scottneelan]

All This Silence

It’s awful quiet here, alone where I’ve been left behind again Crisis brings the chaos and everyone else swoops in Someone always seems to save me from falling in completely But they always disappear back to their own worlds Others can walk away from this but I can’t leave myself and the isolation calls so cold, so dark, so empty so free from the pain of falling All these last-minute…

[scottneelan]

Love Stories

Surrounded by these great love stories wondering when my turn will come if only I could stop falling for the broken and unobtainable I try so hard to give my heart away to those not ready or not available or far too scarred from their own past failings only to watch drop it in the nearest trash can as they walk as far away from me as the path can carry them Is it any wonder that some…

[scottneelan]

You Break Me

You break me in ways I can’t explain Leave me twisted in impossible knots Throw out every higher function and all that remains is a babbling mess It’s so far beyond understanding the how’s and why’s and what you do without effort, without knowledge, without even having to try I wish I had your strength so that I might shore up defenses solid and sturdy enough to hold against whatever…