🪐

it’s chloe

[secondpersonpov]

Saw a headcanon about a character being transfem which is ofc beautiful but it was a whole long post with evidence that this is the logical conclusion and the evidence was like… this character acts submissively and is implied to have been the victim of sexual violence. Um

[secondpersonpov]

Idk maybe I’m being ungenerous here but like “o think this character is a woman and the narrative exploring some of the sexual trauma and dynamics that can coincide with that” ≠ “having sexual trauma and being submissive makes you a woman. because those are Woman Things” and the post did not really do anything to not be the second take

[secondpersonpov]

Saw a headcanon about a character being transfem which is ofc beautiful but it was a whole long post with evidence that this is the logical conclusion and the evidence was like… this character acts submissively and is implied to have been the victim of sexual violence. Um

[secondpersonpov]

Ugh ok I called sick and I’m going home now. After sped ign most of the day getting basically nothing done and probably humiliating myself in front of my coworkers who could probably tell I was trying hide having a breakdown

[secondpersonpov]

Goddddd this is so embarrassing what if I killed myself on the bus home

[secondpersonpov]

Ugh ok I called sick and I’m going home now. After sped ign most of the day getting basically nothing done and probably humiliating myself in front of my coworkers who could probably tell I was trying hide having a breakdown

[secondpersonpov]

I am like. having a breakdown about Remi right now and I’m kind of thinking maybe I should ask to go home from work but I also don’t think anything will be different at home except that I can stop trying to hide that I keep breaking down crying

[secondpersonpov]

It is soooo fucking humiliating to be doing this oh my god I know my coworker can tell I’ve been crying and is just awkwardly not bringing it up

[secondpersonpov]

I am like. having a breakdown about Remi right now and I’m kind of thinking maybe I should ask to go home from work but I also don’t think anything will be different at home except that I can stop trying to hide that I keep breaking down crying

[secondpersonpov]

I’m just getting more and more worried I made the wrong choice not to try surgery with Remi maybe it would have been fine maybe she could have had another year. But I’ll never it’s too late to try that now her tumor has grown so much and she’s obviously getting tired. I think I only have weeks left with her if that

[secondpersonpov]

I feel so horrible about it it feels like I failed her. I was hoping she’d at least live to a year and a half

[secondpersonpov]

I’m just getting more and more worried I made the wrong choice not to try surgery with Remi maybe it would have been fine maybe she could have had another year. But I’ll never it’s too late to try that now her tumor has grown so much and she’s obviously getting tired. I think I only have weeks left with her if that

[secondpersonpov]

Once again my struggle to try to form a concrete understanding of how gender works and to try to situate myself within it is being foiled by my inability to read the minds of everyone around me to understand how their gender works

[secondpersonpov]

Like once you start questioning whether the idea of a “man” and “woman” are categories that actually have any merit or material basis outside of constructing patriarchy everything gets so ??????? Trying to talk to people with a firm concept of their gender like ok so did you get your gender bc this is the way that works best navigating a world where we happen to have come up with this insane binary or bc you have some sort of Immutable Spark of Gender within you that we based the whole binary thing on in the first place. And then you talk to a cis person and they’re like. “I think men and woman have completely different brains” and it’s like ok god. right i forgot we were starting here

[secondpersonpov]

Once again my struggle to try to form a concrete understanding of how gender works and to try to situate myself within it is being foiled by my inability to read the minds of everyone around me to understand how their gender works

[secondpersonpov]

Anyone else feeling absolutely insane lately

[secondpersonpov]

I NEVER LEAAARN

[secondpersonpov]

Anyone else feeling absolutely insane lately

[secondpersonpov]

I have not rlly been keeping up with a lot of the transmasc + privilege discourse bc I feel like it’s not rlly my lane but one of my mutuals has been making little comments lately where I’m like whaaaaaat is going on here

[secondpersonpov]

My coworker is clearly in a bad mood this morning and is typing SO aggressively it literally sounds like he’s trying to hurt keyboard

[secondpersonpov]

In my switch to edibles to protect my poor little lungs I am realizing that maybe the fun part of smoking weed mostly isn’t even the getting high part it’s the smoking/vaping part 😭

[secondpersonpov]

Random bc my reading for class just reminded me of this, but my friend’s sister (who is my age, my friend is a couple years older) is autistic and has been living in a group home with other autistic women for most of her adult life and hearing how much she and her housemates have their autonomy restricted (not allowed to leave without being signed out, having their phones and other belongings taken away, etc) was so eye opening for me, but one thing in particular that has stuck with me is that apparently one woman doesn’t have any family living near the home so she only got to leave when her boyfriend signed her out

[secondpersonpov]

I’m meeting with my dnd party tonight so we can all like like. talk about some tensions that have been coming up before it becomes an issue (one of the players is being kind of annoying in rp and I think sort of missing the point of the campaign but the other two are frankly too pressed about it imo). Which is 100% the right thing to do to make sure we’re all having fun but it’s so funny and unserious to me. Yeah sorry I’m busy I have a meeting with my dnd group to figure out how we can all play dnd better

[secondpersonpov]

This one player is kiiiind of pmo tho. I know he means well and I get it’s the character he’s RPing but we’re doing a political intrigue campaign and his character wants to always tell the truth and just immediately kill anyone who isn’t a good guy unless he thinks we can redeem them. And everyone else has characters who are like… comfortable with lying and politicking to some degree so whenever this becomes an issue (many, many times!) his character argues with us and tells us we’re bad people 😭 last session my character straight up told his that if he wants to be a hero he needs to find a different mission to be on so I was a little worried the drama was my fault but apparently he’s actually mad about something another character did weeks ago instead