Today, I fucked up... by going too far with mosquito repellant
This fuck up is so fresh I just got done scrubbing it off myself in the shower..
So there I am in the outdoors section of my local store with my girlfriend looking at bug spray. I’ve successfully convinced her to come fishing with me three times recently, but she has now tired of the mosquitos. I have as well.
We usually use dry Off spray. Last time we went we had to respray ourselves a few times. The store was out of said spray so we try to look for something stronger.
Now, there is a variety of spray available… non DEET, 15% DEET, 25% DEET. We notice a 40% DEET spray and decide that we really fucking hate mosquitoes. We look for something higher than 40% mosquito Auschwitz level hell but have to settle for that as there is no higher percentage.
Fast forward to us standing near the dock, drenching ourselves in 40% DEET spray. We’re wearing tank tops and shorts for context.
My face starts burning but I don’t say much. I enjoy the hellfire as I cackle imagining all the mosquitoes around me promptly dying in a blistering inferno.
A few minutes pass…. my girlfriend pokes me and asks if her chest looks red. I take a look and folks, it looks like she’s been sitting on a baking sheet in the Arizona heat trying to fry herself up like an egg. We both look sunburnt.
Fuckup number one: dousing ourself in the equivalent of hatred fueled gasoline.
So after a lot of sweating and swearing we get home and into the shower. I grab for this soap my girlfriend uses to get this shit off of me! As I’m scrubbing myself voraciously like I’m trying to become a simple skeleton, my poor skin begins to burn MORE somehow. This is when I realize…
Fuckup number two: using microdermabrasion abrasion soap to get DEET hell off, but instead rip my skin open in tiny abrasions so it can further punish me for my sins.
I am now laying on the cold hardwood floor trying to let my skin cool off. My girlfriend is not thrilled with the experience and probably will not be as receptive to fishing outings anymore.
TL;DR tried to combat mosquitos with what felt like jet fuel and wound up melting skin like steel beams :(
By: Adventuredditor
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